A/N: Hola! Sorry it's taken me so long to update… (Yes, three days IS long for me. I usually update every day) but I've been super busy with school and junk… anyway here you go!

CHAPTER 9

Advice from Someone Who Knows

Jess awoke about thirty minutes after Leslie's letter arrived for him. Ripping it open he read his friend's words, feeling sick as he did. He knew he shouldn't, but he did. She was sweet, innocent, forgiving, and peaceful. Same as always. She didn't blame him for her accident, she wanted to thank him. She needed to see him, know that he was alright. She needed him as much as he needed her. And that terrified him out of his mind.

What do I do!? He was screaming in his mind. I'll never, ever be able to have peace about not telling Leslie now!

Jess was nauseous. He didn't know what to do. What could he say to Leslie? He couldn't just blurt out 'I love you.' Like he wished he could. He pondered the scenarios in his mind.

Walking to Leslie's house, flowers behind his back. He's older, sixteen or seventeen.

"Hi Jess."

"Hi Leslie. Listen, there's something I gotta tell you…"

"Wait me first!" She's excited.

"Yeah?"

"You know Bob Smith?"

Jess paused for a minute. Bob Smith was Leslie's imaginary boyfriend, he realized.

"Yeah…"

"Guess what?" Leslie is ecstatic now.

"What?"

"On our date last night, he told me he loves me!"

Jess shook his head. He hated that one!

"That's what'll happen if I wait too long." He muttered.

He tried another.

Jess and Leslie are thirteen, two years in the future.

"Les, can we talk?"

"Sure Jess, What's up?"

"Leslie…I've, um, felt this way for a while, two years now, and I'm really hating this secret between us."

"Okay….." Leslie eyes him. Jess begins to sweat.

"I…I…lo…"

"You what, Jesse? You know you can tell me."

"I love you!"

Leslie pales and runs away, never to speak to him again.

Jess choked back a scream. This was awful! Almost as bad as his nightmare. Leslie wouldn't hate him that much for loving her…would she?

"Unless she loves you back." He spoke aloud, and clapped a hand over his mouth. That was the first time he had admitted verbally that he loved Leslie.

"Ugh! I can't! I can't tell her! I won't. That's it, I won't. I'll never ever, EVER see Leslie Burke again! EVER!" He didn't mean a word, even he knew. He would speak to his friend again, someday, but today was far too soon, in his eleven year old mind.

He picked up Leslie's letter and stared at it.

"You're smarter, Les." He whispered. "What's wrong with me?"

He suddenly grabbed the letter with venom, rage filling his every pore.

Idiot! His mind screamed. She doesn't love you! You're so stupid, Aarons. Stupid and hopeless.

Hopeless…

Hopeless. That was it. He was hopeless. With or without Leslie Burke, he was hopeless.

He was about ready to rip the letter to shreds when Doctor Tibnon entered.

"You're awake! Finally. Your friend was about to have a heart attack, waiting for you to write her."

"Humph. She won't like me soon enough." Jess spat, venom dripping like chocolate in August.

The man raised his white, bushy eyebrows. Very curious…

"And why is that, Jess?"

It was Jesse's turn to be surprised.

"How do you know my name? Are you my doctor?"

"No. I'm Leslie's doctor. She's told me quite a bit about you, sonny."

"Like I said, she's hate me soon enough. What does it matter?" He was practically growling.

"Why will she hate you? And I can assure you, she will not. She adores you."

Jess perked up. "Does she? What did she say?"

The same reaction Leslie had when I mentioned his affection for her… interesting.

"She thinks you're a wonderful friend."

Jess was visibly wounded. "Is that all? You swear?"

Tibnon chuckled. "That's hardly a shabby compliment, my boy."

"I know." Jess sighed. "I was hoping…" He stopped himself. What was he thinking?!?! There was no way he was telling some doctor he was in love with Leslie!

No words were needed, however. He saw it. He saw it all. They love each other, and the other has no idea. Tibnon closed his eyes, remembering a young lady named Lisa Harrington, a love he had tragically lost.

"You love her, don't you?" Tibnon asked.

Jess paled. Had Leslie told him? Did she know?

"Yeah…she's my best friend…" Jess could barely say the words without choking.

"I didn't mean friendship, Jesse. Do you love her? Would you want to spend the rest of your life married to her, have children with her, be hers forever? Do you find yourself dreaming of her, sometimes in awe of her physical and spiritual beauty?"

YES!!! His brain was screaming.

Instead, he stuttered. "I-I, do-d-don't know. I'm a k-k-kid."

"Follow your impulses boy! The elderly man was nearly shouting. He had to save the boy, the girl, and their families, from the fate he had endured.

"What are you feeling now? If you could marry her now would you? Do you possess the undying love in your heart that would support you both forever?"

Jess stared at the papery blanket. "I love her more than my own life." He whispered, tears forming in his dark eyes. "But she might not. I couldn't lose my best friend. Not after today."

The doctor softened. "You are wiser than I."

"Huh?" Jess looked up. His voice was stronger, but his eyes held the hours of pain he had possessed since the afternoon in the rain.

"As a boy, my best friend was Lisa Harrington. She was a lot like your Leslie. I loved her from the moment I met her. We met at school, at age thirteen, a few years older than you are now. Well, I harbored my love for her for almost seven years. Then, one day, when we were twenty, she announced that she was going to college in England. She would be leaving in a week. I was furious. If I had told her only three years earlier, she might not be leaving the country. So I told her. And she was mad. Not mad because I loved her, in fact, she loved me too, but she was mad because all those years I had kept a secret from her, a big secret, and I allowed it to eat me up inside, ruining the years of our friendship."

"What happened?" Jess was engrossed in the story.

"She got in her car and drove off. She was speeding, and hit a telephone pole. Everything would've been fine if she hadn't been speeding, but she was. The pole fell, making a lighting like bolt. She was hit by it, and it killed her. She was dead, because of my secret. Because of me. I had killed Lisa, the love of my life, my best friend. All because I was scared."

"Oh." Was all Jess could say. "Oh."

"Leslie isn't Lisa, Jesse. Don't make her become Lisa. Don't make my mistake." He was whispering.

"Okay. Okay." Jess was determined. Leslie, his Leslie, wasn't going to become Lisa Harrington. She would know. She would trust him.

"Write her, boy. She needs you." With that he rose.

He was only a few steps out the door when he heard Jess say softly:

"I need her too."