I know and I'm sorry but I really had a new idea for this story so I want you to read and tell me what you think.

Disclaimer: Do Not Own Shaman King.

Yoh had truly changed, not changed as in he's more built and more seme to me any every way change. It's just that he not as lazy as he used to be, he's lazy just not like he used to be. His eyes are what really changed. They were so dark, loving but cold, it's a if I was looking at myself, a mirror. That's what I always wanted, for Yoh to be like me, yet when I look at him I can't help but get this feeling. A feeling that haven't felt in a long time. To realize only now that that feeling was fear, it was shocking to say the least.

He gave up his friends, his spirit gaurdian, and his best friend, the human, to achieve one single goal.

Ever since he had gotten rid of Opacho, Spirit of Fire, and my powers, I never would have thought that Yoh's most truthful intention was to break me. Was it weird that I could never read Yoh's thoughts as clearly as I could read others? Was it foolish of me to have brushed it off as nothing when Yoh was planning something for my demise?

My heart, my will, my soul. He wanted me broken, because in my search for a shaman only world I had refused to give him the one thing that I truly needed.

To never be alone again.

I guess that's why he broke me, the great Asakura Hao.

Yoh broke me.

It started with that girl, his ex-fiance. What did Anna do to Yoh for him to have been so angry? I don't know, to be honest I could care less about that woman. Even though I truly hated that woman I could not help but stare. The way Yoh beat that girl it struck something something that should have told me to leave, runaway, or even better kill myself for that would have been a perfect means to escape. But even that would not have stopped Yoh especially since he is Shaman King now.

It all happened so quickly and it only took one year, you would think that I would have lasted longer than that but I didn't.

Anna.

He beat her so savagely, the hatred that burned in his eyes, the betrayal that burned in hers. Why did I feel such pity for her, why did I feel so bad. Was it because he pulled out a rope and tied her to the tree outside. Was it the way he hung her from her neck forcing her to gag and cry in reflex. Maybe it was the way he made the short human, who had come with her, watch as he screamed for Yoh to stop. That human blamed me for the way Yoh beat Anna asking what I had done to Yoh.

I wanted them both to die, yet I did not because I felt... pity. I don't know why I felt this way or why I wanted Yoh to stop. He looked at me standing in the doorway with an over sized button up that stopped at my thigh and no pants. I was his faithful uke then and I was glad that he wanted me in the end. The way he looked at me, 'dressed as my wife should' as he would put it. I am his Shaman Queen after all. Maybe that's why he did it, why he had beaten that girl. And I was happy for that one minute that he would do this for me. Yet that girl was not important.

He didn't need to do it yet he did it anyway, and I had to rethink those words he said to me that day.

"I do this for you."

That's what he said before setting the girl aflame, and I stared as those red flames turned blue before extinguishing to leave her laying in a crumpled breathless heap before he sent her home in a flash of yellow. To burn ones soul was a simple message that I did not see to until the end.

One thing I do know is that I ran upstairs, feeling that feeling that I had not felt in a long time, fifteen thousand years to be exact.

Why? That I did not know.

Yoh's POV

When I finished Anna off I watched Hao run up the stairs and slam the bedroom door. I knew I had to go get him and explain, for the hundreth times since I have been with him, what I did. I sighed as I went up the stairs to get him.

"Hao, Hao let me in this is the big bad Yoh. Let me in or I'll blow the house down." I laughed waiting for a response my lazy smile spreading as usual.

"... that's not funny Yoh. Do you really thinks that's okay? What if your friends come over here pointing their fingers in my face?" Hao demanded opening the door in the process.

"They won't, want to know why? Because I'll do them the way I did Anna, and if that doesn't work then off with their heads." I say laughing lazily. I knew my eyes had darkened because Hao gives me a bewildered look staring longer than nessacery.

"Yoh, what's happened to you? This isn't like you at all. Maybe I should tell the patch council or have you chopped their heads off too?" Hao asked anger rising in his voice.

"No actually I had them return to America and stay. I told them not to bother me either, besides," I say watching his reaction slowly morph into a a confused sadness. "They will know what happened to Anna in time." I finish reaching out and pulling him into a french kiss. He yanks away and gives me a hard look.

"Hao, you should know better than to say no. It can and will get you in a lot of trouble." I walk over to the bed and laid down. I unbottened my shirt as I listened to his confused ramble.

I swear, Hao really just didn't get it. None of them did. The old Yoh they all knew is gone or better yet he never existed to begin with. I got tired of pretending a long time ago or better to say the day Hao refused me.

"Hao," I call out softly. He looks at me a tear sliding down his cheek. Hao didn't notice the change I placed within him. If he did he would notice that when his tear hit the floor it turned into a red pearl, that I will put into the box on the bed stand. A dark red and orange box that he never pays any attention to when he goes to sleep. He walks over to the bed and slides his shirt to the floor. I pull him into the bed and kiss him from head to toe. I pull him under me and slowly caress him until he started moaning to my every touch.

" Hao." I say again.

" What?" he says pulling me into another kiss.

" Do you love me?" I ask ready to laugh at the look on his face.

"Do you want this or not," he remarks snidely.

"Yes, but I want to know if you love me." I tell him while rubbing against him making it hard for him to answer.

"Yes! Yoh, please stop that and do it already!" He yelled gripping me hard just the way I like it.

"Okay " I say grabbing the lube from the night stand. I worm one finger in watching him hiss and squirm. Then I put in the last two as he started rubbing his erection against me. I position myself before thrusting in. He bucked pushing back against me.

I swear that it felt so good that I started to get rough thrusting in and out violently as he screamed. I threw his legs over my shoulders as I rammed into his prostate making him scream even louder. It was then that he started fighting me and pushing me out making for a tight squeeze. So I reached between our bodies and stroked forcing his tense body to relax and take what I had to give him until we both came together. I always enjoyed it on the rough side mainly to deliver the pain Hao had once to many delivered to me.

"Hao," I say calming down slightly.

"What?"

"You know I love you right?" I ask I know the answer is plain and that he is used to saying this phrase everytime we make love, rough love.

"Yes Yoh and I love you too." Hao replied before drifting off.

I looked at him. He is so peaceful in his sleep, it's a peace I want to last for eternity.

"I love you more than you think Hao, you just don't see it yet." I say before I fall asleep too.

I know I know. But tell me what you think.

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