Identity

By Elle Kitty

Let us go then, you and I,

When the evening is spread out against the sky

Like a patient etherized upon a table;

Let us go, through half deserted streets,

The muttering retreats

Of restless nights in one-night cheap hotels

And sawdust restaurants with oyster shells;

Streets that follow like a tedious argument

Of insidious intent

To lead you to an overwhelming question…

Oh, do not ask, "What is it?"

Let us go and make our visit

The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufock

T.S. Elliot

Atris had told the youngest Echani Handmaiden many things about the Jedi Exile, some most disreputable but, as Brianna investigated the rooms of the Ebon Hawk, all she could deduce was that he was a human being like any other. There were not many items of personal value in the vessel; perhaps the TSL had removed all of his property or he simply was not the sort of man to allow anything that could tell anyone about him to lie about for someone to pick up. What Brianna did find did not prove to be incriminating, as she was supposed to be looking for evidence that could point to the Jedi Exile as the source of the recent destruction of the Peragus Mining Facility, but she did uncover other interesting facts. What she did find, which included a pair of Pazaak cards that had fallen below the pilot's seat, a disabled HK unit in a side cargo compartment, a shoe left under a bunk in the starboard dormitory, and a pair of dirty socks in the refresher, did indicate that the majority of the current occupants of the Ebon Hawk were not female.

Brianna could not help but wonder what sort of man he was, as she stepped lightly into the main hold. Would he be clever enough to find his way to this academy on the ice cap to recover his ship and T3 unit? If so, would he be angry with the Echani Handmaidens and their mistress for having "stolen" his ship from its hanger on Citadel Station? If he was what Atris had claimed him to be, what would he say when he met the Jedi Historian once more, this time as a returned Exile? Would he notice Brianna? Would he take her somewhere, somewhere far away, far, far away from her sisters' cruelty and malice? Or would he walk past her, fixed on whatever mission he had appointed himself to follow?

She brushed her small hand through her short silvery hair with a sigh and resigned herself to the fact that she could never follow the Exile; that she would never allow herself to trust someone whom Atris so despised, no matter how much she wanted, no, needed to get away. But, even as she was able to steal a private moment for herself in which she could think, one of the five reasons for Brianna's need to "get away" stepped into the Main Hold.

Adele was older than Brianna, taller, slimmer, and willowy. She wore her beauty like a cool pale mask, like a thin sheet of frost that covered her features and only under that was the real woman. Identical beauty, Brianna reminded herself. And what good is beauty when all around you possess your same features? Except Brianna. The youngest Handmaiden possessed a different face from the rest of her sisters, a different beauty. Her features were bolder, rougher, and where Adele's eyes were silver, Brianna's were blue-gray. Brianna's beauty was more striking than that of her sisters, if only in its uniqueness. But, such unique beauty soon had proved to be an affliction rather than a gift.

"Sister," said Adele, "just because you recovered the ship does not mean that you must spend all of your time aboard. Your time would be better spent perfecting your fighting stance. Sometimes I do not understand you. You have some potential and, were I you, I would develop what little potential I possessed, even if it were to amount to nothing."

Brianna forced herself to smile at her half-sister. Half-sister. There was the root to the older sisters' hatred of the youngest Handmaiden. That hatred had grown like a weed, sprawling until it bubbled over until it was not only Adele and Clytemnestra who found offense with Brianna, but also Serena, Lyra, and Alianne.

"I do not know, sister," replied Brianna through clenched teeth, "but perhaps it is something about this ship that calls me to come here. It is easy enough for me to practice my pattern dances in the ship's cargo hold. I would hate to get into your way in the training room."

"Or perhaps you are drawn to this place because it is a reminder of one of your few accomplishments," said Adele musingly, a sweet snake. "Truly, we are indebted to you for your recovery of this vessel. We are also grateful for your devotion to search the ship from top to bottom but I tell you that there is nothing here. There is no longer any purpose for you to spend your time here. Besides, Atris has no use for this ship herself; it is only part of a test."

"A test?"

"To wait and see if the Exile finds his way here in pursuit of his "stolen" vessel. Until he arrives, there is little reason for you to be here. Come. Let us go."

"Let us go" Adele had said but Brianna was uncertain that she wanted to follow her elder sister. "Let us go" the Echani had said, the perfect Echani who embodied the epitome of serene combat, but Brianna did not want to be that. If she followed, would she soon find herself in Adele's position, silently unhappy with the duty of a nun charged with organizing unruly schoolgirls? If someone else said "Let us go" to Brianna, would the youngest Echani be more willing to listen? But Brianna only stepped forward and followed her sister out of the Ebon Hawk. As far as Brianna could tell, there was only one way out of the ship and only one way to find her place in the galaxy and that was to follow Adele and the others until she could finally break away. But, as to how she was going to break free, that was a mystery.

…

But if there was one person that Brianna did wish to follow, that would be Atris, the Jedi Master and Historian that had been the one-time master of the Exile. Atris had taken all six Handmaidens under her steady hand, matronly in a way, and had trained them to be resistant to anything that might taint the sisters. She had taken all six under her wing regardless of parentage and for that Brianna was grateful. There could so many who might set the youngest Echani aside from her sisters, consider her to be "impure" because of her father's actions, but Atris had done no such thing and for that Brianna was indebted to her.

It was her that Adele and Brianna left the ship in order to meet with but, before they stepped into her council chamber, there was a sound like a scream across the sky and the two sisters stopped and turned. There was a sound like a crash, as though something hard and metallic had slammed into their very ceiling, and then Adele nodded to her younger sister and said, "Take Alianne and see what has happened up there."

Brianna nodded, presenting a show of obedience to her sister, and then went down into the training room before activating the door that led into the small room she shared with Alianne, the sister closest to Brianna's age. The young woman was lying on her cot, staring up at the ceiling, silver eyes wide open. Brianna stepped towards her own cot and then opened the footlocker below her bed, retrieving a set of white furs that she then wrapped about her torso and head. Alianne rose from her bed and asked, "What has happened?"

"Adele wants us to go up onto the plateau and see what is up there," answered Brianna as she clipped her quarterstaff onto her belt, allowing her hands to rest for a moment on the weapon that her father had once held in his hands. She shut the footlocker and then opened it again when she saw that a corner of a silvery gray robe had become caught in the hinge. She tried to remove the fabric without damaging the material as Alianne watched curiously. "It sounds like there was some kind of crash landing."

"But who would know where to find us her?" questioned Alianne with a slight tremor in her voice. "Who would know where to look? It couldn't be…"

Knowing that Alianne was about to say, Brianna shook her head. "It couldn't be him. Not even he could track his ship down in so little time."

"But what if he has come here? What if he has come here and he is seeking retribution? What if he is here to destroy us all in revenge? What if what Atris has told us about him is true and he has fallen to the Dark Side and he is here to enslave us? What if-"

"Or what if he is only confused and wondering where his ship has gone and somehow picked up on this small structure?" interrupted Brianna, closing her footlocker again. "What if he only wants to talk to Atris and is not seeking retribution? I saw nothing on his ship that would indicate any fall to the Dark Side."

"But there was nothing to see!" exclaimed Alianne. "Anyone who hides any trace of his presence surely has something to hide."

"Alianne," she stood up and took her sister by the shoulders. "I do not think that he is here to kill us; I do not think that he is here at all. Whatever Adele and I heard was probably only a scouting droid or something of that kind, sent here to evaluate the area and shot down by one of our turrets. Surely it is nothing but we have to look. I need you to keep your head and come with me, alright?"

Alianne nodded and, after retrieving her own white furs, followed Brianna out towards the exit onto the plateau. Lyra stopped them before they could exit. "Our cameras have recorded some kind of space shuttle landing on the plateau," she told them, "outdated model, little threat. What it brought here, however, could be a threat. Are you certain that you do not want someone more experienced to accompany you, Alianne?"

"I am certain that we are more than capable of handling this mission on our own, Lyra," said Brianna coolly. "Thank you for your concern."

She nodded at Alianne and then they entered the elevator and stepped onto the icy plateau, the shrill biting wind gnawing at their faces. Even bundled in warm white furs, they shivered. Alianne's teeth chattered as they moved towards the wreck, the black scar against the white of the snow, and stood beside the shuttle. Brianna knelt and took off her glove, cringing at the wind brushing up against her skin. Nevertheless, she placed her numb fingers against the battered hull. "Still warm," she murmured. She circled the crashed ship and then pointed out a large hole in the underside of the vessel. "It was shot down."

"One of our turrets?" Alianne asked.

"I am… unsure. Lyra did not mention anything and, well, she was the one who examined the feeds. I think it was something else. Unless-"

They both jumped at the sounds of blaster fire and ducked instinctively behind the wreckage. Atris had taught them to attack only as a defense. And, as they crouched in the snow, sure enough, the sounds stopped. Alianne made a move to look around at the other side of the ship, but slipped and landed with thud on the ice.

And it was well enough that they had paused as three figures made way to the entrance to the new Telos Jedi Academy. Brianna made way as in pursuit, but as confrontation was not necessary, their sisters would take care of that, Alianne held her back. "Wait," the elder instructed and then knelt in the snow.

Beside the Echani sister was a crumpled figure. Brianna helped him up. "Shh, you're safe now," she said patiently. He was a Zabrak, mechanic from the looks.

He looked up at them. "Bao Dur," he said, gesturing to himself. "You are?"

The Echani handmaidens shook their heads. "Such things should not be necessary," murmured Alianne, the perfect picture of the neutrality and indifference they had been taught to use in public.

Brianna was taken by surprised, but only slightly. This had been drilled into their heads since birth and it should have seemed only natural. But Brianna missed the wicked twinkle in her sister's eyes, the essence of mischief. But now was not the time for such things.

"We will try to forget your name, as we were not to have known," Alianne went along dutifully and her words had a sort of memorized quality clinging to each syllable. She wanted, needed to forget. But Brianna wasn't about to do the same.

Bao Dur nodded once, before asking for water. Brianna uncorked her flask to find it had frozen solid. "Never mind," she sighed, screwing the stopper back on. "We can get you some later."

And, once again the dutiful Echani sisters, they took him back inside. He passed out again soon enough and Brianna felt ashamed from not finding him water immediately. Was containing a potential enemy of greater importance than granting him a simple and necessary request? But Brianna did not have time to ponder such moral quandaries, or so she told herself, and she regretfully flicked the switch of the cell that Alianne had placed him in, confining the harmless prisoner.

When she returned to the antechamber, she found that her five other siblings, including Alianne who shot a worried glance toward Brianna, had surrounded a trio of humans, presumably the three figures she had seen on the plateau. If these were the same people who had inhabited the Ebon Hawk, she had been correct: there was only one woman in the party. How strange that even now, Brianna could find amusement in such a thing!

Her second eldest sister, Clytemnestra, threw her a triumphant look that only hinted at the glee she must had felt at being the one to apprehend the intruders, a look only Brianna could have deciphered. How she hated Clytemnestra! She hated the elder sister's proud walk, proud stance, and proud attitude. Atris had long since cautioned Clytemnestra that pride would go before a fall and Nessa, as only Adele was allowed to call her, had bowed her proud head and said responded meekly that she would try to do better in the future. Atris had been satisfied but misled, as the moment Clytemnestra had exited her mistress's presence, she had tossed her head back and laughed for sheer joy that she had deceived the kind Jedi Master.

But Clytemnestra had obviously hoped for a battle between the intruders and the sisters and had not yet relieved the newcomers of their weapons. Determined to take the lead once more, Brianna stepped into the ring. "Throw down your weapons," she said in a voice as clear as crystal, "and you will not be harmed. I would not do that if I were you," she told the man with messy brown hair as he reached for his blaster. "I will not touch you but I cannot say the same for my sisters."

The dark haired man smiled charmingly, almost leeringly, and said, "Surrounded by lovely woman, am I? I was just reaching for my Pazaak cards. You can tell your lovely sisters that they are welcome to do just about anything to me, provided that they-"

"Atton," the man in the center said warningly. "I agree with her. Your hand is getting too close to that blaster." The leader shook his dark red hair out of his eyes, displaying prominently the gold streaks. He grinned boldly at Brianna, a challenge, a hope, a wish. A look that might have been returned under other circumstances. Brianna could feel the blush coming to her face but his smile turned serious as soon as Brianna's mistress entered the vicinity. "Atris," he said without preamble, "I ought have known."

Brianna stared but kept her face a mask. Could this be him? Zeke Karis? The Exile? She pulled her hood over her head so that she could study him without his noticing. She took him in as Atris took him in. He seemed a kind man, if one cared to notice such things, which Brianna did. He was a handsome man, if one cared to notice such things, which Brianna told herself that she did not. He had brown eyes and hair that was of the shade of the redwood trees in Telos's new forests. Something about his stature was pleasing to the eye; Brianna had to stop herself before the sight of him brought a smile to her lips. And…there was something about him. Something that would, under any other circumstances, draw Brianna closer to him. She wanted to follow him, wherever he went, and for some reason she did not find that surprising. He was the sort of man that could make anyone want to follow him.

But now he followed Atris out onto the platforms that bridged the chasm that divided Atris's . Atris had put on a stony expression. Brianna watched them leave, regretful that she could not be privy to their conversation.

Serena, Brianna's fourth sister, raised her eyebrows and glanced at the two humans that had followed the Exile into the academy. The man whom the Exile had called "Atton" was now raising his hands above his head with a comical expression on his face, obviously thinking he was amusing and could charm his way into the sisters' affections, while the old woman, whom Brianna found she suddenly had a deep respect for, watched Atton's bravado with complete and utter disdain. Brianna beckoned to Lyra and Alianne and the three of them ushered the two companions to the holding cells where they could join Bao-Dur.

The old woman entered her cell willingly with the slightest of grimaces as she observed her accommodations but the male put up a bit of a fight. As Lyra attempted to usher Atton into his holding cell with calm words explaining that this would be temporary until Atris could determine the Exile's intentions, Brianna exchanged a confused glance with Alianne when his posture shifted into the stance of an Echani.

"You can't be serious," Atton said. "You're telling me that I should be reassured to find out that my fate is dependent on whether or not your ice queen thinks Karis is sane? That's a battle already lost."

"Into the cell, fool," the old woman snapped. "Cooperate and you will survive."

Cooperate he did but it seemed that he could not resist exclaiming, "Why is it that everywhere we go I end up in a cell?"

Brianna let out an exasperated sigh and left to attend to Atris. She found her mistress standing alone in the council chamber. "You let him go then," the handmaiden said with wonder. "You let him go."

"I did," the white haired historian replied. "I let him go but I have his promise that he will attend to some… matters that concern him. The last Jedi. He is to seek them out and arrange a meeting with them and with me. I want you to go with him." That last sentence was said quickly and with finality. Brianna knew there was no room to argue. The Jedi continued. "I want you to accompany him on his mission and make sure that he does what he has agreed to do. I expect you to provide me with updates and record his behaviors. Mark those who influence him and should you run into any trace of the Sith, inform me immediately."

"Of course, mistress."

"There is another thing." Brianna paused when Atris said this. "I want you to… gain his trust. Befriend him. Discover what makes him… tick. Find the dark taint that I know must be deep within him and, when you do, contact me. I know that you will not fail me, Brianna."

"I need to know something, mistress. Something that might aid in my perception of his current behavior," she said and then hesitated. "What… what was he like? What was he like before the Mandalorian Wars claimed him as you say they did?"

Atris sighed and looked down into the abyss. "We all have our heroes. And we die as we watch them fall."

…

It had been simple enough to slip onto the Ebon Hawk. It was less simple to find an appropriate venue to announce her presence to the rest of the inhabitants of the ship without provoking an angry reaction. Brianna decided to make her next move when they were far from Telos and the Exile and his companions had gathered in the main hold, the main hold that Brianna had studied only a few days before. She hesitated for a moment, crouched in the corridor, and waited for the proper time to reveal herself. Finally, unable to remain hidden any longer, she stepped out into the light and said, "It would be a mistake to go to Nar Shaddaa unless you are certain that the Jedi Master has situated himself there."

There was a moment of stunned silence as each companion took Brianna in. She looked at each of them, silently willing them to accept her among them, and only then did she look to Zeke. "I would prefer that we went to Dantooine."

Zeke watched her but he did not see angered by her arrival. He reached out into the projected galaxy map and drew a line with his finger between Telos and Dantooine. "There have been reports of ion storms along that hyperspace route," he told her. "Onderon is in a difficult political… mess and… and I am not yet ready to go to Korriban."

It was then that Atton spoke up. "Are you here to steal the ship again?"

"I never said that I stole the ship."

"I don't need to take your word for it. You're obviously Atris's favorite little minion; otherwise, why would she have sent you here? You probably did steal the ship." And then he muttered, "And here I was blaming the trash compactor."

Brianna then chose to address the rest of her remarks to Zeke. "I am here to aid you in your mission," she told him. "I would accompany you, if you were to accept me."

"I would decline," said the old woman who had called Atton a fool. "It is not wise to keep a servant of Atris so close. But the decision is yours, Exile. But remember those who exiled you."

Bao-Dur smiled at the Echani. "Kreia is right that the decision is yours but, if she wants to come, I say let her," he said with a shrug. "If she is truly our friend, that is a benefit. And if she proves to be our enemy, well, 'keep your friends close but keep your enemies closer.'"

"I'd like you to come with us," said Zeke. Brianna smiled at his response. But Kreia scowled.

"I disapprove," said Kreia flatly. "If you wish to speak to me, Exile, I will be in my quarters."

"Yeah," agreed Atton. "So will I. I'll be in my quarters. But, since I don't have any, I guess I'll just be in my cockpit where I usually hang out. And she can stay in the cargo hold. Maybe that'll teach her a thing or two about locking people up."

Atton and Kreia exited as did Bao-Dur. Only the Handmaiden and the Exile were left standing in the main hold. "My name is Zeke Karis," he said, "I'm… well, I'm the Exile. I suppose that Atris has told you about me?"

Brianna glanced around, suddenly nervous. Here she was, alone with this man, and she did not know what to do! "Yes," she replied uncertainly. "I'd… I'd better go and see about that cargo hold."

"You don't have to stay there if you don't want to."

"It's fine," Brianna reassured him and then stepped away, pattering lightly down the hallway until she reached the cargo hold. She touched the bag she had deposited there earlier and sat down, leaning against the wall. She closed her eyes and then realized something.

His name was Zeke Karis. He had introduced himself, though he had no reason to as Brianna already knew who he was.

But Brianna had never told him her name.

…

In the room the women come and go

Talking of Michangelo

A/N: I feel so much better now that I've fixed this. Please review and leave your opinion about the rewrite. -EK