Chapter 1: Realization

This takes place at the end of the sixth movie: Baron Omatsuri and the Secret Island! (The one with the flower lily thing!)

EDIT April 2, 2010: I'm rewriting the series, correcting grammar and spelling mistakes and rewriting some parts so they flow together better. The plot will stay the same, only the way it is said will be change. And for those that read this before, yes, I have since actually seen the movie now, which is why more corrections have been made.

When Luffy saw the rest of the crew before him he made sure to look at each of them, ensuring him that yes, they are okay, as in alive, as in not-dead.

The pure relief and joy that he gained from the thought made him slightly dizzy but he continued to examine his crewmates, assessing for himself any injuries they might have obtained

After he assured himself that they were all indeed alive, blinking several times to make sure he wasn't dreaming, he laughed.

His nakama looked at him strangely than at each other. Luffy paid them no mind as he continued to laugh. The pure joy and relief that he felt overwhelmed him, he couldn't help but laugh to relieve some of the emotion. High of adrenaline and happiness Luffy sat himself up, not even feeling the wounds on his back and arms as they stretched and strained and reopened. Currently they weren't bleeding but if he wasn't careful they would soon.

He looked at his nakama who were still staring at him and flashes of memory started to flow through his mind unwillingly

"There goes the racoon-dog."

His laughter was slowing down but did not stop as another flash went by.

"There goes long nose."

His laughter was calming down immensely and the starting of a frown were beginning on his face. The others didn't notice as they were involved in their own conversation.

"There goes a girl."

Luffy's laughter had stopped completely and still the others paid no mind, assuming he had just calmed down.

"There goes the cook."

Luffy was now sitting still gaze unfocused as the day's events flew by in his mind. He glanced around again once more assuring himself that they were all okay.

"There goes the other girl."

He had been almost too late. The thought struck a cord deep with in him causing his body to shudder. 'It was too close' he thought as he gazed at Zoro.

He watched helpless as his swordsmen, first mate, best friend and final Nakama fade away into the lily's ethereal light. A sense of peril and anguish and fear filled him as his head was forced back, having been stretched out as far as it could go, his gaze never leaving the place Zoro had once been. They were gone. They were all gone.

'Far, far to close'

He was shaking now. 'What ifs' began to fill his mind as different scenarios played like a cinema reel behind his eyes. What would Luffy have become if he had no Nakama? The answer was simple, nothing. Luffy tried to stifle back a sob as he remembered his nakama fade into the light, as he watched completely helpless. The sound that resulted was quiet, but not quiet enough, as it caught his loyal first mate's attention. Luffy was hunched over his hat covering his eyes and his shoulders shaking as he clamped his mouth shut as he was determined not to cry.

'Not here. Not Now. Not in front of them. They need you to be strong.' Luffy chanted over and over in his mind. He could feel the swordsman's gaze boring into him as the laughter of the rest of the crew and the others filled the air.

"Shut your mouths." Zoro's harsh voice filled the air; his gaze never leaving Luffy's hunched over, shaking form.

The others were staring at him at him at his blatant remark. Sanji opened his mouth, most likely to call him a stupid marimo head who has no right to tell others to shut up especially Nami-swan and Robin-chwan. But he and the others realized that although the first mate was obviously talking to them he was not looking at them, in fact, he was staring narrow-eyed at their captain.

The others' gaze followed his and toward the captain. They all stared wide-eye at him. Nami took a tentative step forward, most likely to attempt to see what was wrong when a quiet sound echoed through the air.

It was a sob.

Despite his best efforts Luffy couldn't control the emotions rushing through him like a waterfall. He tried to cover it up with a laugh now that he knew for a fact that the others were staring at him like he had grown a second, no a third head. But the sound that emitted sounded strained and almost strangled. He couldn't cry, not now with everyone watching. His arms were wrapped around himself, as if the motion alone would help hold his composure long enough to get back to the ship. It offered little comfort and only served to make him look even more pathetic.

The surge of emotions was suddenly overwhelming as he heard and felt another sob rip through him. His shoulders where shaking horribly as he curled into himself, even more so, until he was almost in a fetal position.

His crew was watching this scene unfold with wide eyes. Never before had their captain expressed emotion in this way. They only expressions that the crew could ever recall on him were happiness, anger and the occasional thoughtful look. They unconsciously believed that he couldn't feel sorrow of any kind, at least not true sorrow that could cause him to cry in this way, a soul-crushing heart-wrenching kind of sorrow found in the elderly men and women who had seen far, far too much. What had happened while they were unconscious that caused their captain to react this way?

The wonds that Luffy once couldn't be bothered to feel were now back with a vengeance that included warm sticky blood slithering down his back, soaking into his shirt and pooling around him. Head buried in his knees, the wounds on his arms began to open wide, as if gasping for breath, releasing crimson tendrils that drip dripped into the slowly growing puddle around him. The next sound the emitted from Luffy was a groan of pain as the self-awareness of his wounds began to affect him. The sobs were coming more frequently now as pain was added to the mixture of sorrow, relief, helplessness, anger, regret, and self-hatred that Luffy was feeling.

The shock that was originally affecting the straw-hat crew wore off as the blood pool around Luffy expanded at an alarming rate. Zoro quickly pulled his captain from his fetal position and realized that he had passed out from the blood-loss. He made a move to scoop the captain up and bring him back to the ship until a loud voice intervened.

"NO!"

To everyone's surprise it was their own Tony Tony Chopper who yelled out against moving the captain.

"If you move him his injuries will only get worse! Lay him on his stomach and remove that vest!" Choppers commands were loud and clear as he slipped into doctor mode.

Doing as he was told Zoro removed what was left of Luffy's red vest, how much of it was red from blood it was impossible to tell, and laid him on his stomach. What was seen shocked all of those present as dozens of holes covered their captain's back. Blood and pus seeped out as chopper began to clean and disinfect each hole in his back. Everyone remained silent as they all watched the young doctor work their captain wounds until the bleeding stopped.

Chopper silently signaled for Sanji and Zoro to help him lift their captain up as to wrap the wounds on his back. They walked over silently and the each took one of the captains freshly wrapped arms and lifted up into a somewhat sitting position, holding him there. The tear tracks on Luffy's dirt and sand coated face were clearly visible on his sleeping face. But no one said a word.

All of the crew stared at the captain as chopper worked. They took in his bloody appearance and they gazed at the scars that covered Luffy's torso from previous battles before they were covered up by bandages. Each scar having their own story some of which they mentally noted and checked off while others they had never seen before. The scar where Arlong bit him was one of the scars that were easily identified by the crew. But the scar diagonally across from his left side to his right shoulder. Was one none of them had seen before. But it looked to be old as it was nearly faded completely and would not have been noticed had they been not staring so intently at their captain. It looked similar to Zoro's own scar, obtained with pride from Mihawk, but this scar, deep and gashing and warped and shiny, looking like it had been ripped open repeatedly, was not a scar of pride…it was a wound meant simply for killing in a painful sort of way. The wound…a wound like that most certainly should have killed him.

They took in his matted hair, which was coated with sweat, dirt and blood both fresh and dried.

They examined his face which was also covered in dirt and blood but they also saw the tear tracks the lined through the grime. The salt from his tears probably weakened them they realized. That would mean that even if he wanted too Luffy wouldn't be able to cry because his devil fruit abilities cause him to weaken around if touched by salt. But that would mean that Luffy wouldn't be able to cry if he wanted too, so he must have smiled and laughed instead. The thought that their captain could be miserable without them knowing made the crew stiffen and scowl lightly at the captain. But the crew moved on with their silent examination of the boy, no man, that they call captain.

They took in his hands, though they looked smooth like a child's each of the crew touched his hands at one point or another and they knew that, in fact, those hands of his were covered in calluses and nearly invisible scars from all of his training. They were rough and strong hands that fought many battles. And, if turned into a fist, were often they reason of defeat for their enemies. But at the same time when they patted your shoulder or head or they squeezed your hand or arm in reassurance they felt soft and kind despite the wear that could be felt.

Although covered with bandages they knew that his arms were thin and scrawny but if he were angry or if one were to grab his arm they would feel or see the muscles easily as they flexed. The same went for his legs, with wirey tendons that seem to breate with a life of their own.

Captain, their captain, young and old and weak and strong and stupid and intelligent and kind and ruthless, an elastic mess of contradictory traits that made him the best and the worst captain they could ever ask for. He was a captain they would support and protect with their dying breath. Bit more importantly than that, something even more special than being a captain for whom they would willing die for, is that Luffy is someone they would gladly live for. Because dieing for someone, while is may be brave and nobel and ritegeous, is far to easy a path to take, one with no consequences for the person making the sacrifice, how can there be when he or she is already dead? No, living for someone is a far more noble goal, to be able to live for someone and face consequences and pain and sorrows with stide, that is the sign that a captain is truly good, when a crew is willing to live for them.

Their conviction was strengthened as they carried the broken, bloody mess of their child captain to the place they had all come to call home, a trail of blood droplets marking their path.