Author's Note: The result of boredom and the horrible, crippling writer's block interfering with the fan-fiction I should actually be working on. My apologies if it has been done before. Dedicated to "Anonymous," who would happily beat me to death if I revealed his/her (cough-her-cough) name. Thank you for the fresh subject.

Disclaimer: Insert something wonderfully clever that ultimately sums up to me owning neither Twilight nor its characters (or Midnight Sun for that matter) here.

CHAPTER 1: FIRST SIGHT

The thirst was driving me crazy.

It had been two weeks—two long weeks—since the last hunt, and the cafeteria was packed with human bodies. Soft, fragile, delicious humans. An incessant ripple of worry worked its way through Alice's every movement, and her eyes shifted in my direction whenever she thought I was significantly distracted. Apparently I was not concealing my hunger as well as I'd hoped.

I looked around the cafeteria aimlessly, searching for even the most trivial of distractions. My gaze eventually settled on the apple lying atop my lunch tray. A century and a half ago, I might have enjoyed the lopsided little fruit. My grandfather used to pay me for help around the farm with fresh apple pie and a short glass of cream up until my twelfth birthday. It had been a favorite of mine well into the War.

I squinted hard at the fruit, trying to force myself into finding it appetizing. Nothing. We may have been "vegetarians" in the vampire sense of the word, but apples were hardly sufficient.

My sudden musings on the past surprised me. Our kind did not often dwell on our human existences. There was no purpose in pondering what had occurred or could have been. And yet, strangely, I could not help but wonder what had become of the old farm just west of Houston. Not that it made any difference. I would never return to the South if it was avoidable, but…

My body froze and my mouth watered. In the name of all that is glorious, the scent!!

I tensed, my eyes immediately finding the source of the intoxicating, salty aroma. A silly little girl standing in front of the heater. So wonderfully defenseless. So easily dealt with! It took everything I had not to rise from my chair and take her. It would be as simple as leaning down to whisper in her ear--to allow my lips time to reach her throat. I could practically feel her pulse beating against my teeth before permitting the delicious red liquid to glide along my taste buds. My mouth filled with venom at the very suggestion, eager for something fresh--something satisfying.

Edward kicked my chair, his eyes disapproving.

I drew my daydream to a halt instantly. Of course, even the tiniest of thoughts was going too far. No matter how fantastic the idea, Edward would know. I almost wanted to have the girl anyway—to justify my reproach—but the desire was gone.

"Sorry," I muttered.

Edward shrugged, preoccupied with another's thoughts for the moment.

"You weren't going to do anything," Alice said soothingly. "I could see that." She glanced at the girl and spoke more quickly. "It helps a little if you think of them as people. Her name is Whitney. She has a baby sister she adores. Her mother invited Esme to that garden party, do you remember?"

"I know who she is," I snarled softly, looking away from her.

I regretted my tone almost immediately. If there was anything worse than being the weak link in the family's resistance to our natural diet, it was being rude to Alice. She was my entire world; the meaning of my eternal existence. But feeling her pity was beyond unbearable. No one had the right to allow her flawless smile to falter, least of all me.

I felt her leave my side and focused harder on the long, thin windows leading to the outside world. Perhaps my time with Maria had permanently weakened my endurance to anything less than instant gratification. I would have to hunt tonight. There was no other option. I would not be the one to break everything we had worked for. This was my home now, and no one was going to take it away from me.

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Edward's head snap to attention. It was a brief movement and he quickly relaxed, chuckling under his breath and turning his attention to Emmett.

"Jessica Stanley is giving the new Swan girl all the dirty laundry on the Cullen clan." He smiled at Emmett's unspoken question. "Rather unimaginative, actually. Just the barest hint of scandal. Not an ounce of horror. I'm a little disappointed."

I had long ago adjusted to Edward's half-spoken conversations, but with Emmett it was particularly easy to follow. I could not imagine him ever thinking anything he would not willingly put into words.

Edward leaned forward slightly, clearly seeking out the new girl's reaction. A strange expression flickered across his face for a moment. Annoyance? He concentrated harder, staring at the girl. I felt a flash of unease, even a touch of anger. My eyes moved to my brother's face immediately. But he heard the girl speak and turned away, hiding his smile at some thought he was clearly not meant to overhear.

I frowned. If all was well, then why did he keep exuding such an unusual level of frustration?

"Shall we?" Rosalie asked, flicking her hair behind her shoulder and rising from the table with her usual elegance.

The three of us moved to follow, Edward's frustration still seeping from his every pore.

"So, is the new one afraid of us yet?" Emmett asked with a grin.

My brother shrugged and we left the cafeteria. I followed his strange trail of emotions with mild curiosity, unable to make any sense of it. My mind kept careful tabs on his particular emotional wavelength, eager for any distraction from my innate thirst as Emmett, Rosalie and I walked into class.

We were playing the part of high school seniors this time, though perhaps "playing" is not the right wording. After all, that might imply enjoyment, and I received none from this particular piece of our human drama. All I wanted from high school was to get through the tired charade without killing any of my classmates. If I happened to pick up another diploma along the way, well, so much the better. Apparently the humans were somewhat against my plans today. That, or they were just very, very stupid.

"Um, J-Jasper?"

I stared down at the child blocking the way to my desk for a long, wordless moment. The poor little fool. Didn't she realize how heavenly she smelled as the blood rushed to her face? I fought against the wild urge to lean in and silence her fluttering heartbeat. Alice had said it helped to think of them as people, but I couldn't place her name. Catherine? Cassie?

"Do you need something?" I managed at last, tightening my fingers into a fist. Control was crucial. The South had taught me that both in life and this new eternity.

A heavy wave of embarrassment. I relaxed slightly at the emotion. Something personal. I could not feed on awkwardness.

"I…" the girl's voice faltered. She stared at the ground and thrust a note into the careful space between us. "I know there are some rumors going around that you and your sister… Well, that doesn't matter, I guess. What I mean to say is, on a scale of one to really lame, how do you feel about, um, love…letters?"

Mechanically I reached for the note, measuring the carefully folded piece of paper in my palm. After two or three seconds of forced deliberation, I closed my fist on the letter and easily tossed the crumbled mass into the trashcan near the blackboard.

"Sorry, I'm not interested."

With the girl still too startled to be hurt, I slid into my seat beside Emmett just as Mr. Fowler fumbled into the classroom. The impossibility of being with someone else—a human no less!—nearly made me laugh aloud. Where Alice ended, I began. There was nothing of any importance before or after that single, unalterable point.

"So," Emmett began, exaggerating the word as the teacher droned on about physics. "The weather should be perfect for another little one-on-one. Are you in?"

I scowled. Knowing Emmett, he would consider massacring the entire student body an even trade to a wrestling rematch. He had never been one to take defeat gracefully, and, unfortunately, I did not have the self-discipline to indulge him. Even the squirrels scurrying outside the window were starting to look appetizing. "I don't really think…"

Desire! My body snapped to attention. Never had I felt any emotion so completely dominate someone's being. It overpowered me--knocking the air from my lungs.

"C'mon, Jazz," Emmett continued, blind to my sudden incapacitation. "I'll take you down quick, I promise. What do you say?"

I shook my head, my eyes wide. Shame, revulsion, dread, bewilderment, irritation, loathing--the emotions cycled through me, blocking out all room for thought. There was no way such feelings could be coming from Edward alone. Someone going through this would have to be absolutely mad. The possessive tension in the air alone…! It was simply not possible.

I opened myself to the other emotions surrounding the immediate area, subtly sampling the various ripples and bursts of feeling. Cassie's rejection smashed forcefully against my psyche while Emmett's mild disappointment buzzed quietly in the background. I sifted through the people around me carefully, empathizing with them in the most absolute sense of the word.

Edward's energy was unmistakable. It poisoned me; oozing a tangled combination of passionate yearning and contempt. I tapped my foot against the linoleum, unaware of the movement until Rosalie raised a perfect blonde eyebrow in my direction.

Take action or stay put? It went against all of my instincts to even have to consider the latter option. But how to leave without drawing attention from the others? My brother's conflict continued to rage within me, interfering with any attempt at reason.

"Will you just relax?" Rosalie snapped, her lips moving far too quickly for human ears. "You're making the entire class frantic."

She was right. I was being careless—allowing my own emotional energy to leak into the rest of the room. There was no need to go wandering after Edward. Alice would know if anything of importance had taken place. I willed my body to calm, ignoring Edward's frantic fluctuation of emotions for the moment. There would be time for that after class.

Now if there was only something to distract me from my thirst…

The day went by painfully slowly, though I had come to expect that now. My family had long ago developed their infallible patience, but I struggled to match them. Planning, preparation, biding my time; these were simple. They suggested an action in the near future. But this tedium was intolerable! I needed excitement, a challenge, anything! Humans could offer me nothing…except temptation, of course.

I wheedled away the hours concentrating on nothing in particular. Edward's frantic emotions disappeared by the time we changed classes, leaving me with only Emmett's incessant nagging as a distraction. When the bell rang, it took everything I had to move forward at a "normal" pace. I wanted to run out, find the closest beast in the vicinity, and feast.

But no. We slowly walked to the car, and "patiently" waited for Edward to arrive. The human charade was not quite over.

Alice danced to my side, casually linking her arm to mine. "Someone has a crush on you," she sang, laughing like a child with a new toy.

I raised an eyebrow. "You were watching me all day, weren't you?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Of course not," I murmured, finding her hand and quickly brushing my lips against her fingers. "Thank you. It's not a good lie, but it helps."

Emmett's disgusted snort broke through any mistaken sense of privacy. "Come on already, Jasper! I can bring you down in five minutes—maybe three, if you want."

A dark growl rumbled against the back of my throat. "No."

"Look, give me just one minute and I'll let you have the next grizzly."

"Don't make promises you can't keep, Emmett. Besides, I have no interest in grizzlies."

My brother's retort was interrupted by Edward quickly sliding into the driver's seat, leaning against the steering wheel and gasping desperately for air.

"Edward?" Alice asked, alarm in her voice.

He shook his head.

I raked my nails along my kneecaps to fight against Edward's violent emotions. There could be no doubt now that the feelings were his and his alone. The revulsion and yearning were made all the more potent by his close proximity. For a wild moment I could not separate his feelings from my own. I wanted something--I needed it with every fiber of my being. The blind desire was absolutely agonizing!

"What the hell happened to you?" Emmett demanded, distracted from our rematch for the moment.

Edward threw the car into reverse and sped out of the parking lot, his driving much more reckless than he would normally allow in the presence of our classmates. All eyes naturally fell to Alice.

She shrugged, her expression solemn as she "saw" Edward's future. "You're leaving?" she whispered at last.

"Am I?" Edward hissed through clenched teeth.

"…Oh," she said, her eyes widening as she went deeper into her vision. "Oh." I found her hand as the lightest trace of fear worked through her system. She seemed to delve further into her trance, trembling against something we could not see.

"Stop!" Edward groaned, the word strangled with suffering.

"Sorry," she whispered, her eyes wide. She gently pulled her hand from mine and edged closer to him. "I'll miss you. No matter how short a time you're gone."

Emmett and Rosalie exchanged an apprehensive glance.

"Drop us here," Alice instructed softly. "You should tell Carlisle yourself."

The car rolled to a stop just in front of the turnoff onto the long drive before home. We filed out of the Volvo in silence, Alice pausing just long enough to touch her brother's shoulder.

"You will do the right thing," she ordered. "She's Charlie Swan's only family. It would kill him, too."

"Yes," Edward said curtly, staring straight ahead.

With a nod, Alice moved to my side, a steady trickle of anxiousness polluting the air around her as the silver Volvo drove away.

"What happened?" Rosalie demanded.

"Give him time to tell someone himself," Alice said quietly, staring after the car. In one graceful movement she disappeared, leaving the three of us standing alone in the woods.

With a heavy sigh, I pulled my hands through my hair and set off in the opposite direction.

"Where are you going?" Emmett yelled.

"Hunting." I would not follow when Alice did not desire my company. That much I could give her.

A slow, fierce smile crept to my face as I broke into a run. There was nothing like the feeling—the utter release of energy as the wind hit my body and my feet moved across the earth. It was not happiness, but freedom. And power. I moved against my limitations…against Alice's worry and Edward's cryptic emotions. Everything in me writhed with restlessness. I flew faster through the forest, breathing in the woody smells with grim satisfaction.

My heartfelt pity to the unfortunate beast I ran into first.

And I guess that's the experiment (for now, at least)! Thank you for getting this far!

Praise and criticism are appreciated! :)