Written for Nozomi-sama. (Dear, I hope you like it. And, uh, seriously.)

Comments and criticisms are definitely welcome.


"Can I kiss you, Itachi?"

Kakashi wasn't exactly sure what implored him to ask that. Maybe there was something that moved him in the fact that only he and a subordinate of his, Uchiha Itachi, were the only ones left of their six-man ANBU team.

It had been what most would call suicide missions. It was just like every single mission Kakashi and his platoon would take. Except, for some reason, one large fluke had occurred and everything went down for their team.

The mission was a success. But he could've gone without his dead teammates.

Itachi looked up at him.

And nodded.

Kakashi supposed that this was because Itachi thought that what he said was more of a command than anything, and Itachi was the perfect ninja and would, without a doubt, follow his superior's orders.

But Kakashi was more of an opportunist than a man of morals.

He leaned towards Itachi and bent his head a bit. Then, he placed his lips on Itachi's lips.

Their eyes were both open and their lips were both somewhat cold and chapped, especially Kakashi's. That smell of blood which made them feel something coppery-tasting on their mouths hung around their surroundings.

Itachi didn't bother to respond to Kakashi's kiss. He saw no reason to. And he knew that Kakashi really didn't expect him to return the favor.

Kakashi decided to be more daring and placed his slightly quivering hands on Itachi's shoulders.

The boy felt cold, he reckoned. Which was normal since it was freezing. He knew that he probably felt cold, too.

He could feel blood caking those partially bony shoulders. He thought that he didn't mind.

After a while, Kakashi placed his hands back to his sides and he stood erect once again.

"I will not tell anyone," Itachi said.

Kakashi looked a bit surprised for a speck of a moment before he nodded.

He found himself asking, "Would you like to have dinner with me after we pass the mission report?", after a while.

He had, initially, planned on stopping what could and would happen with that kiss.

Though, as always, he'd never really had enough control over his life.

He found himself being rejected a minute later.

"Perhaps lunch, Kakashi-san," Itachi said. "Tomorrow. As I don't suspect you'll be able to pass the mission report today."

"Of course," Kakashi said.

That, perhaps, was when the two of them started forming a rather odd bond.

But odd bonds were normal in their line of work.


Kakashi had gone over to Itachi's house with a basket of food on the excuse of discussing strategies and tactics with Itachi. Mikoto had invited him in with a smile on her face and a twinkle in her eyes like the good housewife she was, and remarked that it seemed as if Itachi would be receiving a lot of visitors today. Shisui, basing from what she said, had just left around half an hour ago.

Kakashi had to wonder where the great ninja that she used to be was. The woman had been — and, it seemed, always would be — infamous in ANBU.

He shrugged those thoughts out of his head once he was came inside Itachi's room.

Currently, he was lounging on the floor with a hand languidly twirling locks of Itachi's hair as the other read various scrolls filled with jutsu.

"You don't need a heart to love," Itachi said all of a sudden, his eyes still on a scroll.

"You're odd, Itachi-kun," Kakashi said, chuckling at the end. "What made you say that?"

"The mind is able to fool even itself." He continued as if he hadn't even heard Kakashi. Though Kakashi certainly wouldn't put it against him if that turned out to be the case. "The mind is able to stimulate these so-called emotions which make the person feel what we call love."

"This isn't love." Kakashi stopped twirling the lock of hair wrapped around two of his fingers.

"I am aware of it. Though your actions continue to baffle me, Kakashi-san."

It baffled Kakashi, too, and in every sense of the word. He didn't know what prompted him to give Itachi gifts every now and then, or to take the boy to restaurants and pay for all of the expenses. Or to actually spend some time with Itachi just like what he was doing right now.

Perhaps it was because Itachi was an Uchiha like Obito, and the latter would certainly liked all of those things as Obito was, as far as Kakashi could remember, a sucker for free things, just not the ones Kakashi gave to him. Then again, Kakashi never did give him anything.

"You've probably never felt love before," Kakashi remarked nonchalantly.

After a while, he was surprised to hear, "I have," coming from Itachi. The words had been uttered softly, had been handled with such gentleness that he wasn't quite so sure really came from the Itachi he knew.

"Oniisan, Hatake-san! Okaasan said that it's dinner time now!" someone chirped.

The two could see a faint silhouette of a young boy behind the sliding paper door.

"Of course, otouto. I'll be right down," Itachi said.

Kakashi could see the faintest of smiles on that normally expressionless — if not that, then bored — face which he called Itachi's visage.


Kakashi got himself confined to a hospital.

The med-nin had said that he was incredibly fortunate to have still lived. He had, after all, been subjected to a new poison Kirigakure developed. A poison which, admittedly, had been aimed at Itachi and one which Itachi could've easily avoided. But Kakashi's body had moved on its own and things went haywire. Though the mission was a success.

Kakashi's first visitor had been Gai. And he had said that Kakashi's youthful will was incredibly powerful.

Itachi visited on Kakashi's third day of hospitalization. It seemed as if he was the one who'd been made to tie up the loose ends in the mission and submit the report to the Hokage.

The boy sat on the chair beside the bed and stayed quiet, not even bothering to ask Kakashi if he was doing fine because that, both of them thought, would've just been stupid.

Kakashi was happy that Itachi was, as always, quiet. He'd had his fill of noisy visitors, namely, Gai and the other seemingly rambunctious jounin of all sorts of jobs that could stand his presence.

"I'm leaving, Kakashi-san," Itachi said, breaking the almost comfortable silence that had hovered around them.

Kakashi opened his mouth a bit before he closed it and licked his lips. Then he nodded. He'd anticipated that such a thing would come across Itachi's mind — he himself had the same thought once upon a time, but he had Minato-sensei to stop him. But Itachi had no Minato-sensei and Kakashi was a far cry from being that revered man.

"I understand," he said.

"Please do not try to stop me," Itachi said, "as you are of no condition to do so and I have no plans of immobilizing you further more."

He'd always had the upper hand, both of them knew that.

"I had no intention to," Kakashi said. "Stop you, that is."

"I see," Itachi said. A beat later and he added, "Thank you." Though Kakashi wouldn't have been surprised if it was more an act of formality than one of hidden affection.

"But the next time we meet..." he left it hanging at that.

"If you will be in the way of my goals, I will incapacitate you," Itachi continued.

Kakashi would've probably been happier if the other hadn't voiced out his thoughts as he never really mulled about what he thought outside of the battlefield.

He could've stayed in denial of the fact that his lover, subordinate, partner, or whatever Itachi really was to him would eventually come across the need to kill him. He could've thought that maybe Itachi would spare him if ever such a gruesome occasion happened.

But it seemed as if Itachi wasn't as whimsical or hopeful as he.

In a way, he was grateful.

"And I, you," Kakashi said.

"I wouldn't expect any less," Itachi said.

Silence sunk between the two of them yet again.

They stayed like that for a couple of more minutes before Itachi spoke. "I would like to have spent more time with you, Kakashi-san, but I am needed at our house."

"Of course," Kakashi said.

Itachi stood up.

There was an air of finality around the two of them.

Maybe they were really living on borrowed time, Kakashi mused as he looked at Itachi with somewhat fanciful eyes.

All shinobi were.

Their lives weren't even their own. They were at the disposal of their village, of those organizations they were tied to.

Kakashi had known this for such a long time that he couldn't say that he cared anymore. The one thing he'd obviously never win against was Life. It was pointless against battling that as the outcome would always be the same. It was much better that he'd leave it be. Less hassle on his side.

Retreating wasn't a form of cowardice. It was a strategy.

But for once, after everyone else had died, Kakashi wanted to change his supposed morals and do something against the Life that he'd come to know.

He wanted to grasp Itachi's wrist and perhaps, perhaps, say something that could make time stop, make the younger boy stay.

When Itachi turned his back on Kakashi and began to walk away, Kakashi wondered if there was a point and time in their relationship that he could've possibly, honestly loved the boy.

Perhaps that time could've been now. But he was far too grown-up to chase after someone like Itachi.

Itachi stopped in his tracks as soon as he reached the door.

"I hope that you get well soon, Kakashi," he said in a soft voice.

Though it seemed as if Itachi himself wasn't as grown up as he thought.

It was getting harder to resist the thought of standing up and running after Itachi.


Three weeks later, the Uchiha Massacre occurred, Sasuke was inconsolable, and Itachi had disappeared.

Kakashi never said that he'd known it would happen beforehand. He'd simply locked himself up in his apartment.

It was around two days later when he gave his resignation letter to his superiors and was reinstated as a normal jounin by the Hokage.


When Sasuke had attempted to leave, in a fashion a bit like Itachi's, Kakashi managed to extend his arms, thinking that perhaps he could change Sasuke's mind.

He failed.