Author's note: Although making Carth into a slightly homicidal maniac is a bit out of character for him, when I was writing his dialogue, it just seemed right, so I went with it.
1. Not Supported by Facts
The Ebon Hawk, the former and once more conveyance of the once Dark Lord of the Sith turned saviour of the galaxy turned businessman belted silently through hyperspace. Revan sat motionlessly in a force cage inside the ship's cargo hold, meditating. His recent return from the great beyond outside the known galaxy wasn't yet common knowledge. Indeed, only his fellow passengers on board the ship knew he was even still alive.
He intended to keep it that way. Across from Revan, a gaping tear in the hull of the ship had been temporarily patched with the 'help' of the unfortunate astromech droid, T3-M4. He hadn't been happy to have been jammed in there following the ship's crash landing on Malachor V and he still wasn't happy. T3 emitted a series of beeps that, roughly translated, amounted to, "When I get out of here, I'll ram my shock arm up Atton's..."
Revan's eyes opened as the sound of booted feet on deck plating reached him. The Exile, Ilona stood in the doorway looking at the figure in the force cage.
"What are you doing in there?" she asked as though afraid of hearing the answer.
Revan turned his dark eyes to her green ones and replied, "I like it in here. It's private."
"Right, whatever. Atton says we're a couple of minutes out from Telos." At this point T3 gave rise to a shrill outburst of droid-speak.
"Look, T3, we've been through this before. Many times," the Exile explained, "You are not going to ram your shock arm up Atton's rear and end see how far it goes. End of story."
"Beep, bleep, boop," T3 protested.
Ilona sighed heavily, "I suppose 'accidentally' shoving him down the loading ramp is OK."
From the cockpit, Atton called out, "If that little junkpile on wheels comes anywhere near me, I'll tell HK to blast him."
"Statement: Meatbag, I would be more likely to blast you. At least the droid has some use around here," HK replied from his corner of the cargo hold.
"WILL ALL OF YOU JUST SHUT UP?!" Ilona yelled. "Eeeeee."
Revan looked at her. "You really oughta learn to relax, sweetheart. Just chill."
"Do NOT tell ME to chill," Ilona snapped. "And another thing, I am not your 'sweetheart.' Ever since you came on board, all you've done is sit and meditate and not lift a finger to help. Well let me tell you something for free, 'sweetheart' the free ride ends now!"
Revan smiled wolfishly. "As I recall, darlin' this is my ship. I make the rules, and if I decide to sit around doing nothing then that's what's gonna happen. Savvy?"
Being reminded of the change of the Hawk's ownership caused an unhealthy-looking red flush to creep up Ilona's face. Pazaak, she thought. How could she have been stupid enough to gamble her ship, her ship on a game of cards? And then lose on top of that? The mere thought of it caused the flush to deepen, almost matching the colour of her hair.
Revan eyed Ilona curiously; he could see a vein in her forehead pulsing rapidly. That much blood pressure probably wasn't a good thing, he thought.
After observing the rise and rise of her blood pressure, Revan decided to relent a bit. After all, he didn't want her dropping dead on him. Aside from the snappishness which he suspected was mostly hormonal, she was actually a pretty cool chick. At least she didn't go on at him about the dark side like Bastila had. He had been the Dark Lord of the Sith after all. He could probably lecture entire academies about the perils of the dark side.
"All right. Calm down. I promise to help out a bit OK?" Revan stood and shut down the force cage. He stepped over to where Ilona stood, still in the door way and placed his hands on her shoulders and looked into her eyes. They were a deep green and with flecks of hazel. A guy could lose himself in there he thought and shook himself. Where had that come from? As much as he liked Ilona and as much as he could watch her swish around the ship all day, and did, he wasn't about to go all ga-ga over her. Let Atton and what's his name, Mical go all dreamy over her.
"We happy?" Revan finally asked as the hands-on-shoulders and looking into each other's eyes thing seemed to have ended.
"We happy. For now.
Anyway, I came to tell you that the Telos authorities are going to
want a full report of events at Malachor. I don't know what to tell
them."
Revan shrugged and walked towards the front of the
ship, "The truth." Then he looked back, "Except for
the part about finding me and all that. If the Republic finds out I'm
back.."
At that point the humming of a repulsor lift became audible has the droid G0-T0 floated in from whatever dark corner it had hidden itself. A metallic sounding voice, kinda like Malak's had been post-jaw severing issued from a speaker set into its spherical shape.
Ilona cursed and muttered, "Weren't you killed when we made Malachor go bye-bye?"
G0-T0 turned his optical receptors onto the Exile and replied, "A common misconception not supported by facts. Did you really think I would risk travelling the surface of Malachor V without leaving behind a replacement chassis with my personality uploaded to it?"
G0-T0 then dismissed Ilona's presence and turned to Revan, saying, "The Senate must be informed of your presence in Republic space so that you may serve as a rallying figure for the Republic."
"Uh...huh,"
Revan said. "And what makes you think I want
to be a rallying figure? The Republic has gotten by just fine without
me these last five years."
"Actually, you and Malak
really did a number on Republic resources back in the day. You
shoulda seen the post battle reports that came out of Telos...I'm
friggin' impressed," Ilona said.
"Yeah, about Telos...I can't claim credit for that. That was after Malak tried to kill me, the rotten bastard. Well I showed him, didn't I? hehe." Revan smiled as he remembered that final battle aboard the Star Forge. Him and Malak, leaning into each other, lightsabers locked and crackling. Malak doing his whole, "You cannot defeat me! I am the Master." bit and so on and so forth. Then the look of suprise as Revan pulled a little sneaky pistol from inside his robes and shot Malak between the eyes.
"If I may continue," G0-T0 broke in.
"What?!" snapped Ilona and Revan at the same time.
"As I was saying, the Republic is really quite fragile right now and I must insist that the Senate learn of your presence here."
Revan looked at HK-47 from the corner of his eye and back at the floating sphere in front of him, "Of course, G0-T0," he said in the soothing voice he had used whilst torturing pisioners, "We'll do everything you say,"
"Excellent," G0-T0 floated away.