DISCLAIMER: We do NOT own Mai HiME. Damn.

We were on crack when we wrote this. Forgive us!

Shizuru smiled happily. It was finally here! All thanks to her Natsuki! 'Shall we start this...' Shizuru cleared her throat, and turned the mic on. Yes, perfect.

"Attention all students, teachers and personnel currently in Fuka!" She started. Immediately, all around Fuka, the various people wandering around its halls wondered where the voice of their beautiful Kaichou was coming from. She's everywhere. She's perfect.

"This is your own Student Council President, Fujino Shizuru, talking to you all via your new inter-com!" The Kyoto born woman smiled pleasantly. "From now on, you'll all be able to hear all the important information the moment it reaches me!" Needless to say, everyone went rabid fangirl/boy mode after such announcement.

"And let's not forget," she continued "this was all the idea from a certain hot student from here, Kuga Natsuki!" She continuously smiled. 'Oops, I said she was hot? Not that it isn't true...' Shizuru smirked. Natsuki, who had just entered one of the halls, was trying to hide from fanboys (and girls, eventually). Also, Shizuru had temporarily loosened her mind as she thought of Natsuki's hotness. "mmm... Natsuki... oh yeah..." When Shizuru came to her 'senses', she instantly blushed. She was indeed glad that no one was there, specially Haruka.

She cleared her throat once again.

"Huh, anyway, that's all. Your Kaichou, out!" Needless to say, Shizuru went back to daydream. She forgot one thing though...

"Oh, Natsuki... Yeah, shake your ass... SLAP! You like it, don't you bitch? You like it when I treat you like a..." Natsuki passed out, as well as most of the college, out of blood loss. Shizuru went snow white when she saw the signal in her mic.

Green.

"OH FUCK IS THIS SHIT STILL ON?"

We know Shizuru's a bit OOC here, but then again we were on crack. Kill us.

REVISED: One or two spelling mistakes.

Please, review!