Damnation

Kakashi never prayed.

There was no more God for him. And If indeed a higher power existed, it had turned it's back on the evil world he lived in. No, not lived, existed. Living implied he had something to survive for, a goal to strive for. But Kakashi was merely a tool, a hollow shell coated in blood and regrets, lies and darkness, apathy and heartbreak.

This was the jounin-sensei assigned to team seven. A broken man who hid behind his mask and his repertoire of jutsus.

Two children had smiled up at him with genuine eagerness written across their faces and the third cast grudging respect on his form. Kakashi had felt nothing but numbness as he watched the three young ones begin their journey into the life of ninja. How long would their youth last? How long before they lost that gilded purity that bathed all three like a halo?

In this world, they took their children, their next generation, and plunged them in blood. This was what was necessary for the survival of the village and to maximize financial gain. To gain the prestige of one of the five great hidden ninja villages, sacrifices must be made.

And so, Kakashi instructed the determined blond with the cheesy grin the way to easily snap a neck with his bare hands.

And so, Kakashi showed the sweet, emerald-eyed girl the proper way to slit a throat.

And so, Kakashi taught the revenge-obsessed boy how to form lightning into a deadly sword of destruction.

And though with every day they became just a little bit more tainted and just a little bit more aware of the horror their life would soon become, Kakashi began to feel again.

Apathy turned to affection and affection turned to... love?

No, not love, dependence.

He needed them.

They were the string that kept him dangling over the precipice of insanity, of which he would have fallen into long ago. They were the drugs that kept him from slipping into a coma of nothingness. They were his cheeriness, his love, his sadness, his disappointment, his anger, his hatred, his passion, his light and his darkness. Through them he lived again and it was because of them that he was able to ignore the festering wound that had once been his heart.

But time passed and so did their innocence.

Now the stench of blood always lingered on the blue-eyed boy, on his weapons, his hands, his lips, his soul.

Now the pink-haired beauty's eyes were haunted with the apparitions of the souls she had reaped and sent to the otherworld.

Now the obsidian-eyed avenger had become but a distant memory with nothing to mark his existence but the stale laughter that still rang uneasily through the air.

And Kakashi faked a smile.

He faked a smile as the hokage-wannabe waved goodbye and trudged off into the distance, following in the shadow of the toad sannin.

He faked a smile as his only girl demonstrated shattering an entire mountain side, a feat she had learned under the slug-queen herself.

He faked a smile and pretended not to hear the rumours about his final student, stating that he had killed hundreds of civilians in cold blood under the tutelage of his snake sensei.

Then the day came that their team was reunited again... almost. Blue and green danced with happiness as they embraced each other and then turned to tackle him into a warm hug.

It was a embrace that was as much a welcoming gesture as it was a parting gift.

The next day, Kakashi watched his two students disapear into the sunrise, his arms wrapped around her shoulders and her head leaning against his shoulder. They radiated acceptance, resignation and so much love that Kakashi felt something shatter within him. The fox-boy was off to fufill his promise to his first love and she followed with every intention of protecting him with her life. Together they would bring back the final piece of their mismashed jigsaw.

It was raining the next time he saw them.

Blonde, pink and black mingled freely like beautiful strands of entwined silk.

To Kakashi the picture was a black and white scene from an old movie and the rain was the flickering effect of the silverscreen. The only colour that permeated the montony was crimson, almost sinfully bright on such a black day.

The blonde's pale blue eyes gazed sightlessly up at the sky, his face the very picture of peace. Had it not been for the gaping hole where his heart had once been, Kakashi would have believed he was only sleeping.

The black-haired boy lay close-by, his pale chest, visible in his plunging shirt, was splattered with mud and crusted with blood. For once, his ever present scowl had been replaced with an enigmatic half-smile, quirked on pale, bloodless lips. A deep slash marred his neck, his carotid artery had been ruptured causing him to bleed-out. In his limp hand, a bloody kunai glinted.

The pink-haired girl lay between the men, tossed on her side with half her face buried in the mud. Her lips were curled into a satisfied smile as if she had won an important victory. Her chest had been rendered to a meaty pulp and the wound was spiral-patterned in nature. In her back, a large ragged hole adorned the once flawless skin.

Rasengan and Chidori.

It seems that this time, Kakashi had been not been there to toss the boys into water-tanks.

But even in death, they seemed together, unbreakable, untouchable. He gazed at his kids, taking in their joined hands and their serene faces.

They had fufilled their quest to bring him home, Kakashi decided, because for the avenger, home was wherever the blonde-haired boy and the pink-haired girl were.

But he could not touch them.

He could not bring himself to gather all three into his arms and hold them. To rub the flecks of blood off their faces and smooth their matted hair. He could not tell them that they meant the world to him, that they were the precious people that he would gladly lay down and die for.

But for the first time in years, Kakashi felt a prayer form on his lips.

Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord.

He closed his eyes and fell to his knees. These were words he had abandoned with the death of his father and the death of his faith. Words that spilled unbidden from his lips, long forgotten and scorned.

And let perpetual light shine upon them.

The rain was dying away and beams of sunshine filtered through the clouds to fall on their still, peaceful faces. Kakashi felt an unfamilar prickling behind his eyes and a salty wetness that was definitely not rain moisten his mask. For a second, he thought he heard laughter pierce the air, boisterous, delicate and arrogant merging to form a deliciously genuine sound.

May the souls of the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace.

'Kakashi-sensei, chillax, like you'd ever be rid of us that easily!'

'Hn, I can't believe he's crying, what a loser.'

'Shut up Sasuke! Kaka-sensei, you know we'd never leave you, I mean come on, what would you do without us? You're our family Sensei.'

Amen.