Story: Big Hammer
Author: Arsenic Android
Rating: M (for safety purposes and sexual innuendos :D)
Summary: Your hammer's very big Lavi.." Confused by Allen's innuendos, what will Lavi do when he figures it out? AllenXLavi
Disclaimer: None of the characters used in this story are mine. Even though I once cosplayed as Allen, he still doesn't belong to me. Sniffle.
Note: I've only read up to the end of volume 4, so if some things don't add up, I'm sorry. I know that Lavi should be the one teasing Allen, (oh come on, Allen is just so innocent) but I did a little role reversal, so Lavi is the naïve, innocent kid.

"Your hammer's very big Lavi.."

The redhead turned his head so fast that you could hear his neck crack. He had been bent over his anti-akuma weapon that he had just received back from Komui after getting it repaired, when Allen interrupted his inspection. Spotting the grinning white haired teen, Lavi looked at him in confusion.

"If you banged me with it, would it hurt?"

Lavi continued to stare. A few seconds later he replied while scratching his head in bewilderment.

"Um, well it's made to kill akuma, so I guess--"

"Lavi, does it taste good?"

At this point, the usually good humored teen was getting frustrated, and he wasted no time in jumping up off the wooden chair that he was sitting on and marching angrily over to his friend. Allen made no move to back up as Lavi started questioning him to his face.

"Bean sprout, it's made out of wood, why would it taste good? I'd get splinters if I licked it."

Grinning wider, Allen gazed up into his friend's eyes, and reached out for Lavi's hammer that the other exorcist was still holding in his clenched fist.

"When you get excited, does it grow?"

Backing away from younger boy, Lavi went back to his chair and sat down with a thump, confusion still evident on his face. He had just been thinking about Allen before he walked in, but when the exorcist started asking him strange questions about his hammer, he didn't quite know what to do.

Never fully experiencing the strange situation that he was currently in, the red haired teen was flabbergasted at Allen and his strange antics. Besides, they were in a large, empty room, so Lavi could beat Allen up if he annoyed him too much, and no one would be any the wiser. Rubbing his temples and taking a deep breath, Lavi attempted to answer the other boy's strange queries, as bewildering as they were.

"Allen, you have to understand. When I'm out fighting akuma, I don't get excited about it, I just activate it, just like you do with your weapon."

Instead of being put off by Lavi's practical answer, the grin on Allen's face got wider, and he started inching closer to the red haired teen, licking his lips at the same time.

"If I had a weapon like yours, it would be getting longer and harder by now."

Lavi jumped off of his chair in fright. Staring at his surroundings, he startled Allen by shouting at him.

"Why!? Are there akuma around us now?" He swung his hammer around himself in a circle, and was about to activate it, when he realized something strange.

"Wait. What do you mean…hard?"

Letting out a low chuckle, Allen completed the distance between him and Lavi, and pushed the older boy back into his chair. Sitting on his lap and straddling the red headed teen, the younger boy pushed back Lavi's hair and whispered huskily into the other exorcist's ear.

"You don't get it, do you?"

Unsure of what he was supposed to 'get,' Allen was talking nonsense, not him, Lavi just chose not to answer and stayed silent.

However strange the things were that Allen was saying, Lavi couldn't help but get slightly turned on by the voice that the other teen was using. Sure, he had feelings for Allen for a while now, but he just pushed them away and assumed that they were feelings of admiration and friendship, and nothing more. The fact that the other exorcist was straddling him didn't quite help him in ignoring those feelings that were very persistent in letting themselves be known, and his lower regions that were beginning to stir and stand up proudly.

Lavi was getting frantic, so in his desperateness, he pushed Allen off of him only to succeed in making them both tumble to the floor, with the younger boy sitting on top him.

Allen was getting slightly impatient with his clueless friend, so in an act to make him understand better, he snaked his fingers down Lavi's chest, tweaking a nipple along the way, and stopping to rest his hands on his friend's pant's button.

Again, very huskily, Allen repeated his very first statement once more. "Your hammer's very big Lavi.."

All brain circuits slowing down when Allen was feeling him up, Lavi faintly heard what his friend was saying, and realization came crashing down upon him.

"My ham...mer? Oh my good--"

Getting interrupted with a kiss was the best thing that could ever happen to Lavi, and it was given by Allen, which was even better than he could imagine. Feeling his 'hammer' begin to 'activate', the red head just accepted the fact that he was attracted to his friend, and responded to the kiss without further ado.

Allen was not very experienced, but after reading up about certain acts in his spare time in between missions, he felt he could figure out what to do. After successfully unbuttoning Lavi's pants, which he left open for the time being so he could have easier access for later, Allen slowly ran his hands up underneath the other boy's shirt and felt for a nipple.

Letting a moan come forth from his mouth, Lavi let the tension flow away from his muscles and leaned back to enjoy the kiss, and let Allen have easier access. Just as the younger boy was about to start removing his friend's pants, Lavi heard the door open behind him.

Kanda was shocked. He was beyond shock. He was stupefied, and horrified, and surprised and any other '-ed' words that were not registering in his brain at the moment while he was gazing at the scene in front of him.

Allen jumped up with a smile, and helped a sheepish looking Lavi off the ground. Giving a slight giggle at a mortified Kanda, the white haired boy started leading his soon to be lover out of the room, while Lavi just kept his eyes on the ground.

Just before the door was about to slam shut behind him, Kanda heard a shout, coming from Allen.

"Your sword is very BIG Kanda!"

To say the exorcist was embarrassed was a huge understatement. The large tent in his trousers had made an appearance after Kanda had seen the sight of a flushed and moaning Lavi on the floor, and had triumphantly been noticed by a retreating Allen, who wasted no time in mocking him about it.

"Damn kids.." Muttered Kanda as he cupped his erection and headed off into his room to take a cold shower, obviously forgetting that Lavi was the same age, and that he was very turned on by the sights he had witnessed.

"Fucking Lavi gets all the fun." Grumbling all the way out the door and down the long hallway, Kanda chose to ignore the ruckus that was coming from the direction of Allen's room, and the throbbing erection that he was sporting.

I hope you enjoyed this story as much as I liked writing it. :)

I know that they don't have showers, but for the sake of the story, they have individual ones in their rooms. Wow I love Kanda, he's amazing. lol. Please review! :D