A/N : Hey!! I'm new to this site, though I've read some stories on here before. This is my first D. Gray Man fanfic, so it may be a little rough lol. I'm open to any words of encouragement as well as criticism (there's a difference between that and being an ass). I hope you enjoy it.

Warning: T for mature language, sexual content, and violence. Rating will go up to M later (I'm sure of it).

Indicates a flashback, dream, or past thoughts

Indicates current thoughts

Disclaimer: I don't own D. Gray Man or any of its characters. (sadly)

Redemption

You've died while I've had to face my sins

So die.

My soul died along time ago

Stillness

Stillness. Clouded thoughts. Pain beyond measure. Blurred eyes. Blood...

Slender hands reached out desperately, trying to keep him from falling. She grabbed hold of his now blood stained white shirt, but his dead weight pulled her to the ground along with his near lifeless form. Between gasped breaths and panting, their eyes managed to find each others; a brilliant green finding deep brown. Through trembling lips smeared with blood that did not belong to her, the girl managed to choke out

"Don't die."

Her voice was raspy and her throat dry. His hand found her trembling face, even at a time like this, she didn't want to seem weak and tried to hold back tears.

"Its okay, Bumble Bee," he whispered, calling her by the name he had given her when they were young. Tear glazed eyes stared down at him, while the growing warmth of blood spread over him. By now his body was numb and the knife wounds that cut do deeply in his torso seemed to gor wider. Breathing was starting to become harder and more painful. The air burned his lungs; he was pretty sure the knife had cut into one of them.

Her wall finally crumbled and streams of tears fell rapid, when malicious laughter broke out a few yards ahead of them.

"Hehe," a playful innocent like grin spread across his pale face. "I told you, I won't let him have you" he spoke in a sing sing voice, his head tilting side to side, eyes, unblinking.

"Shut up!" she trembled, her body and mind unable to handle the scene she had been thrown into. She turned her attention back to him, fearing that he has slipped away in that brief moment. She cradled him, his body partially in her lap, blood staining her dress.

She examined him; his flawless caramel skin was smeared with blood, his childish yet handsome face no longer had it usual brightness, and his curly sandy brown hair had fallen from its usual tight ponytail. The only thing that remained the same was his unusual and brilliant eyes that gazed into her own. He was dying, but his eyes had never been so alive, she found terror in the way they seemed to welcome death.

"Don't leave me here alone," she cried squeezing his hand.

He smiled, "You'll never be alone." A small stream of blood poured from his mouth, as his wounds grew worse. " But..its too late Bumble Bee,"

Shante jerked out of her sleep. It took her a moment to remember where she was. She stared around the quiet train compartment, relieved that no one had noticed her awkward behavior. General Klaud had been too preoccupied tending to her cute, yet irritating monkey while General Zokalo frowned, looking out the window. This was only the second time the girl had seen him without his hideous mask on

Shante moved from her comfortable sleeping position to see clearly out the window. The grey sky, fog, and drizzle of London made the city seem so humdrum and sad. The weather brought her nothing but boredom which left her with nothing but her own thoughts. Shante left to her own thoughts, usually wasn't a good thing. That's what had led to her dream, or what she liked to call, her "life's nightmare"

She shuddered as she remembered the sound of his twisted voice and sick smile when he looked at her with cruel eyes...how he laid helpless in her arms... the way her last hope had been taken from her... the smell...and the feel...of blood.

Had she been weaker the mere though of the event that took place close to a year ago would have sent her into unstoppable tears. Now all she felt was an ache in her heart, where something was missing. But she pushed the feeling aside. She had to be strong. Strong for him.

Starting a new life at the Black Order, would be where she began. It would be strange. In fact, before a couple of months ago, Innocence, exorcists, akuma, Noah and the Millennium Earl, where things she would have condemned any one crazy for believing in. That was before she had met the two generals who realized she was compatible with the innocence.

"Shante," a deep rough voice called out, pulling her back from the depths of her own mind. She played with the thin sleeves of her shirt and flicked a piece of lint from her brown skin.

"Yes"

"Your daydreamin again,"

She smiled "I know, I get lost in my own thoughts occasionally"

The massive man scrunched his nose and crossed his arms before looking out the window again, "Umph..daydreamin is for fools"

She felt her smile fade and frowned. Glaring at the man, she replied

"Excuse me?" Her sharp tongue ready to attack

Zokalo chuckled and set his lips to talk.

"Winters leave her alone," Klaud spoke, finally entering the conversation.

The young woman felt slightly irritated; her "dream" along with Winters entire presence ( she never cared for the man much) and the ridiculously grey and foggy day had her nerves on end.

"That's it?" Shante asked slightly leaning forward, neck stretched, and curious brown eyes squinted to see how far the dark and dimly lit underground canal went.

A something sharp and hard pressed on her head, followed by laughter, "No stupid, this just leads to the Order. She frowned, but bit back the angry remark that played on her tongue.

The three clambered in the the small yet sturdy boat, similar to a gondola, held in position by a rope tightly wound about a thick pole rising from the end of the dock. The finder sent to wait for them stood in the boat holding the paddle and smiling.

"Welcome back Generals, and greetings, new exorcists," he said with a bow before turning to untie the rope.

The young Black girl sighed, not knowing whether to be relieved or scared at her quickly approaching new life. The more the finder paddled, the quicker she felt her heartbeat becoming. Twisting the golden diamond ring on her finger, a smile graced her face, if it be from pleasure and happiness she could not tell, it may have been her trying to hide her uncertainty as the end of her journey quickly approached in the form of a vast stone staircase.

But this isn't the end yet. Its far from it. She thought to herself. It's just the beginning. This was the road she would take for all her sins and the blood that stained her soul.Closing her eyes, she breathed in the scent of water and wet stone as the boat drew closer to its destination, only a few yards away.

This was her start at a new life.

Live...

Everything in the past...

Live...

Everything that had broken her...

Live for me..

Everything that had condemned her...

Live for what we had

She wanted to leave in the past. She had promised to live, promised to look forward and be strong.

Livethe memory of his voice played in her mind along with her promise as she climbed the endless staircase to the Black Order, the two Generals aheads of her.

Klaud turned when they reached the door, facing the young girl who stood with shinning eyes.

"Well Shante, welcome to the Black Order" as she pushed against the doors.

The girl smiled as light enveloped her from inside, still twisting the ring on her finger and thought sweetly

I will live. This will keep me alive and I will live for you and you alone.