Ok so this is like my 1st fanfic but its ok because I'm a naturally funny person so at least you'll laugh a lot. Enjoy :D.
Disclaimer: I dont own twilight altho I would loveee to own Edward... RAWR... or at least a piece of him :D
Chapter 1
Hunting Bella
BPOV
"Bella, come out come out where ever you are," I heard my psycho of a best friend/sister whisper like those creepy people off of those creepy movies. "Bella!! ugh for freaken goodness sakes come out I'm not gonna eat you!" she put her hands on her hips and stomped her foot. Was it my imagination or was she really angry?
"Says you!" I shout as I ran to a different hiding spot right when Alice pounced on the area i just left. There was no way in hell I was turning visible now. She was probably going to capture me and go shopping or worse... play Bella-Barbie -shudders-.
APOV
Ugh Bella is so freaken annoying when she's freaken invisible. Why did she even have to get that power? Probably because she would always get embarrassed so easily. Stupid Bella embarrassingness. -Has vision of Bella changing hiding spots and deciding to hide on Bella/Edward's bed-
"Bella don't you ever try to hide from a psychic vampire," I purr mischievously.
BPOV
Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap that cannot be any good. I really need to find a new hiding spot NOW! - looks around- hmmm I'll just hide on top of me/Edward's bed.I sneek another peak at Alice. Luckily she was looking the other way so I took off and gracefuly jumped on me/Edwards bed. It's a extremely good thing I'm a vampire or that little stunt would of caused me to trip, fall, and die, even though technically I'm already dead... but I'm pretty sure I could still find a way to trip and die.
"Bella tsk tsk, you are making this wayyyy harder than it needs to be. Especially when I was just going to tell you about the family outing we are all going on." she shakes her head as if ashamed of me.
"1st of all Alice there is no way in hell I'm going on another -air quotes- family outing. -air quotes- Do you even remember what happened at 6 Flags?!" I squealed "Plus I promised Emmett I would blow him up on Medal of Honor when the boys got back" I stated while becoming visible and instantly regretting it.
"GOTCHA!!" Alice squealed as she launched herself through the air and smashed into me. We rolled around on the bed a couple of times before she ended up pinning me on the bed below her. Ok how the hell did the midget pixie pin me below her? she weighs like 80 pounds while I weigh like 125. This made no sense what so ever. Although nothing made very much sense anymore.
"Alice?" I questioned her while tilting my head so I looked like a confused puppy.
"What now Bella?" she rolled her perfect topaz eyes at me.
"Ummm I don't no how to put this but don't you think that we might give our husbands the wrong impression if they walk in and see me pinned on the bed below you and you on top straddling me?" I told her while rolling my perfect topaz eyes at her. Sure Alice has been alive way longer than me but sometimes she was so clueless about how the world thought about certain things. I mean come on if I walked in on us now I would think we are making lesbian love or Alice is raping me or something like that. Ewww mental pictures eww eww eww.
APOV
-Has vision of boys walking in-
"Hmm Bella are you sure?"
"About what...?" she looked seriously confused now.
"That the boys will mind silly," I said while slapping her shoulder playfully.
"Umm Alice what are you trying to say?" ok now she looks really scared. Hmm i wonder...I started to grind against Bella and she instantly moaned. This is going to be easier that I thought.
"Alice!!"
"What??" I put on an Innocent face.
"What on earth are you doing?" ok now she looked seriously confused. Haha Bella looks stupidwhensshe's confused. Her facial expression looks kinda like Emmett when Rose tells him to balance their checkbook haha.
"I had a vision Bella, so just play along, and trust me you are going to like the results. Especially if this little movement," I ground against her again "Will make you make that sound."
BPOV
I couldn't help it so I moaned again. I haven't seen... or touched Edward in a week and I... and apparently my body missed him... ALOT. Alice just looked at me with a smug expression. Grrr stupid Edward missingness. Luckily Carlise is at the hospital, and Rose and Esme are shopping for new love seat because Emmett and Jasper broke the last one in a wrestling match.
"Alice!!" I hissed "our husbands will be home any freaken minute and they will hear us." Ok where did Alice's brain go because I haven't the slightest clue.
"Silly Bella. Trust me Edward misses you as much as... you apparently miss him. Sooo our husbands will be home in 52 seconds and when I say go, I'll do this," I couldn't help it so I moaned again "you do that and our "boy toys" will hear you, run in, and give us both a little "present"...rawr." She did have a point, but I would never admit that to her. She would gloat for days. Well she is my best friend/sister so I guess it would be ok, still kind of creepy because she was a girl but ok.
"Fine Alice do whatever you want because we both know you would any way reguardless of what I thought," she scowled
"Aaaannndd go," this time she put some force behind it, which made me moan even louder than both times put together. Just as everything got quiet the boys busted through the door to find us in this stupid position. I took a glance at their faces and they were full of pure lust. Then I took a glance at his buldging pants and moaned his name louder.
EPOV
As me Jasper and Emmett were returning from our little "camping" expedition, I could hear Alice yelling at me through her thoughts. I sighed.
"Edward!! when you come home and come up to your room don't be mad at the "position" you find me and Bella in. It was my idea and her fault because she was hiding from me so I caught her and then had a vision that I know you will like so bring you and Jasper up to your room to get a welcome home present," I chuckled at this.
"What is it??" Questioned Jasper.
"It seems your wife has arranged a little "welcome home" surprise for us in me/Bella's room." I shook my head
"A surprise?" Jasper seemed cautious yet excited.
"Yep." Then all of a sudden Jasper's emotions hit me like a tidal wave. A huge lust and excitement filled tidal wave from the passenger seat of my Volvo. It is such a good thing Emmett took the Jeep so he could help Esme and Rose with the new love seat. Mmmm love seat. I really want to make love to Bella in a seat, or the couch, or on my piano, or..."Jasper stop with the freaken emotions!!"
"Sorry," he said apologetically.
As soon as I pulled the car in the driveway Jasper and I heard Bella moan my name. I instantly got hard. She is definitely the most dangerous creature I know. I wonder what they are doing in there. Well whatever it is I should be the one making Bella moan, and definitely not ALICE!Jasper and I instantly jumped out of the car and ran upstairs. I practically ripped the door off it's hinges to see what the crap was going on. What I saw definitely surprised me to say the least. I saw Bella laying on the bed with Alice on top straddling her, and to top it off grinding against her with Bella moaning my name... WOW.
JPOV
WOW my wife is soooo freaken HAWT. Even on top of Bella mmm RAWR! I mean oops sorry Edward, but you know i do have a point.
EPOV
I nodded towards Jasper to show he was forgiven... and did have a point. Bella did look pretty hot under Alice moaning my name, but she looks wayyy hotter under me moaning my name.
"Umm Alice I think I got it from here."
"Sure no problem. Besides I have other... Business... to tend to..." she gracefully "dismounted Bella and ran to Jasper. He picked her up and run to their room. Like I don't know what their about to do. -shudders- Oh well because I have have... business... as Alice would put it, of my own.
"Uhhh Edward??" I chuckled
"No need to explain love. Alice did on our way over here." she looked relieved. That's my Bella for you. I walked over to her and sat on the bed, and heard Jasper giggle from their room.
"Did Jasper just... giggle?" Bella asked while trying to contain the giggles of her own. ok enough waiting I wanna make Bella... giggle. She pushed me down on the bed apparently thinking the same thing. She literally ripped all her clothes off and my shirt off then instantly attacking me with kisses and playful nips.
"I missed you Edward. Did you have fun hunting?" she questioned in between trailing kisses down my jawline, then down my neck to the top of my pants, and instantly ripping them off. Ok wow Bella was really in the mood. I think I will have to thank Alice later for her little stunt she pulled off.
"Yes love I did, but not as nearly as much fun as we are about to have." I said huskily while kicking my boxers off. Mental note to self, find and pick up all the pieces of clothing scatterd across our room. I flipped her over so I was above her. Just how I like it. Bella purred. I made love to her
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
BPOV
"Mmmm Edward you are so good to me," I whisper while turning around to face him.
"Not as nearly as good as you are to me," he contradicted "Lets pick up our...mess and get dress before I lose control and keep you in here forever." I purred. As Edward picked up the room I got dressed and went downstairs. All the family was sitting in the living room waiting for Alice's "announcement". As soon as Edward was in the living room Alice squealed out
"WE ARE GOING TO THE ZOO!!"
So What did you guys think? Please review! I gladly take questions advice and praise and even negativity :D..