Disclaimer: We do not own Code Geass… or Zero's Cape… or Suzaku's Lancelot… or Pizza Hut... or Taco Bell... or Alice in Wonderland... I think that covers everything.

Author's Notes- Okay, to explain everything! My friend Jordan and I were just simply e-mailing each other… Everything I said is in normal font. Everything she said is in italics. This trend will continue to be simple… I've edit our scripts to be in the Third Person.

Anyway, our e-mails were the start of something great, stupid, and funny. This is what would happen if we were ever in the Code Geass World, what we would steal, and who would be our best friends and whom we would annoy the hell out of. They start out a little strange and like a weak narrative, but they eventually turn into script form!

Author's Notes- I apologize to the ALL GREAT AND MIGHTY ONES (The Readers) for the inside joke about the "Carry me!" thing... Just had to put it in there... And no, I'm not on crack, I just want to be… Hope you enjoy!!

Important Notice!!!: Please keep in mind, that this chapter is severely... well, brain damaged. And if you're positive we're on drugs, at least look at another chapter. I may sound desperate, but Chapter One definitely does this story No Justice.

xXx

"Orange Boy"... Ha, now Lelouch is just messing with him.

Yeah probably... well Lulu is mean... MEANY!

I know what he'd say to that…

"Well, the soft at heart have no hope in destroying a system as cold and evil as the Holy Britannian Empire."

And I'd look at him and go..."what??"

And he'd say "Exactly."

And then I'd skip off and tackle Pretty Green Eyes to the ground and complain to him that Lelouch is being mean.

Then Suzaku would try to talk to him about it but he wouldn't be able to find him because he would be out chasing me, swinging a heavy blunt object over his head, yelling, "Stop stealing my cape, dammit!"

Then you guys would run pass us...and I scream ASHLEIGH!!... And Lelouch would stop and try to hide the heavy object behind his back

Then Suzaku would look at all of us and ask if that was Zero's cape?

Then I'd look at Lelouch- who's glaring death at me- and slowly say: "Uh... nooo..."

You'd probably be laughing your ass off behind Suzaku's back but when he turned around you would stop and grab his wrist, drag him away screaming let's take the Lancelot through a Drive-Thru!

Then I'd scream C.C were going to pizza hut!!

She'd come running out the door...Out of the corner of her eye see you two... stop look at you and ask why you have the cape. Then would probably ask you if you want the mask to go along with it?

I jump up and down screaming "YES!" and Lelouch would act like he's going to beat himself with the heavy blunt object. She'd tell me where it is and I'd sprint into the Clubhouse at top speed with Lulu still chasing after me. Then C.C. would run off with you two to the Lancelot.

C.C: SHOTGUN!
Jordan: DRIVING!!
Suzaku: (Shudders in fear)

Jordan: Kay so how Do I start this thing
Suzaku: Maybe I should drive…
Jordan: NO!

Meanwhile…

Lulu: Gimmie back my cape!
(Chasing Ash around his room)
(Ash ducks under bed comes out other side)
Ash: FOUND IT! (Mask in hand-Runs into the dinning room)
Kallen and Nunnally: What's going on?

Ashleigh: (Wearing the mask) (Stops in the dining room and looks at Kallen and Nunnally) I FOUND IT!! (Though because she's wearing the mask, Zero's voice comes out instead of her own)
Kallen: Zero? What? What's going on? Why are you here!? Lelouch?
Lelouch: (Stops with the (let's call it a bat) held just above her head) Uh... I found Zero! Let me just knock him unconscious and-
Ashleigh: Ah! No! You can have your stupid mask back! (Takes it off and shoves it into his arms) But I'm keeping the cape! (Runs away)
Lelouch: Hey! (Runs after her)
Kallen: Wait, Lelouch, I've got some questions for you! (Runs after him)
Nunnally: ... What just happened? Hello?

Meanwhile...

C.C.: (On a cellphone) Yeah, I want four large pepperoni pizzas with extra cheese and- you guys want breadsticks?
Suzaku: (Panicking) Watch out for that-!! Oh, nevermind... but that truck-! Ah, never- HEY THE SPEED LIMIT IS 45!
Jordan: That only counts for cars, not big yellow robots!!
C.C: And an order of breadsticks!

Jordan: Hey Suzaku what's this button do?
Suzaku: Umm I'm not sure Lloyd just always said not to touch it.
Jordan: Its really shiny…
C.C: (Not paying attention, still talking to pizza hut guy/girl, comes over and sits on button...)
(Lancelot goes into hyper speed)
Jordan: How do I stop it!!

Meanwhile…

Kallen: Lelouch! Come on wait up!
Lulu: I'll destroy you!!
Ash: You can't catch me! I have the super cape!
(Next thing they know, the Lancelot comes out of know where and runs out in front of them.)
(Jordan, C.C, and Suzaku are all screaming for help)

Ashleigh: Oh dear God... (Turns and runs away from the now Killer-Death-Machine-Giant-Yellow-Robot)
Lelouch: Oh, you've finally given up have you? Now give me back my- (She run past him and he turns around) Damn you!
Kallen: (Sees the Lancelot and notices that Lelouch somehow didn't see the damn thing) Uh, Lelouch...
Lelouch: What? I'm a little preoccupied at the moment, Kallen.
Kallen: Do you want to die?
Lelouch: Is that a threat?
Kallen: (Turns the dumbass around)
Lelouch: (Shrieks like a little girl)
Suzaku, Kallen, Jordan, and C.C: (Look at him)
Suzaku: Hey I think I found the stop! (Reaches up and hits a giant red button, but because he had to get out of his seat to press it he goes flying out the windshield-thing)
Lelouch: (Sees Suzaku flying right towards him) For the love of- (Suzaku bashes into him at high speed and they both get shoved backwards and land in an interesting situation on the ground... coughcoughwinkwinkhinthint)
Ashleigh: (From somewhere far away) FANARTFANARTFANART!! NO!!

Jordan: (looks at C.C) Wanna go get the pizza now?
C.C: Yes please!
(They jump out of the Lancelot and decide to walk)
(Kallen helps Suzaku up while Lulu is cursing under his breath)
(Suzaku jumps back in the Lancelot before Jordan gets another chance to, and takes it back to Lloyd)
(Lulu gets up and starts chasing Ash again telling Kallen to help him)
(Finally he catches her, and uses geass telling her to give the cape back)
(She does)
(But he forgot to tell her to never do it again)
(So as soon as he gets the cape she snaps out of geass and grabs it back and runs)
Lulu: Damn…
Kallen: Jordan, C.C wait up! I'm coming with you!

(Lelouch eventually catches her again and tries to use the Geass... but forgot that it only works once)
Lelouch: Now, give me back my cape...
Ashleigh: (Looks at him like she's in a trance so he thinks it worked) (Gasp!) The eye thing! Do it again! Do it again!
Lelouch: (Sighs) Great... (Walks away because he knows that she'll follow him yelling, "Do it again!" over and over... which she does.)

Meanwhile...

(Suzaku walks into the local Pizza Hut to find Jordan, Kallen, and C.C. enjoying the pizza.)
Suzaku: Where's my piece?
Kallen: (ooks up from her half finished slice with an open mouth that slowly turns into a meek smile.) Sorry! (Sarcastically)

C.C: Does anyone have money to pay for our pizza?
(Kallen and Jordan look at Suzaku)
Suzaku: Ugh fine... now lets go.
(They return home)
Jordan: Ash we're home!
(They see Lulu sitting down on a seat with his face in his hands)
(Ash behind him in a deep, low voice saying, "Do it!!")
(C.C takes mask off table and takes it upstairs)
Jordan: Ash quit bugging him.
Ash: But I want him to do the Crazy Eye Thing…
Jordan: He did the Creepy Eye Thing?
Ash: Yep!
(Jordan goes and joins Ash in the "Do it!" chant)
(Finally, Lulu gets up uses Geass on Suzaku to make him forget he saw the cape and convinces Kallen it's a costume)
(While Jordan and Ash stare in amazement)

Lelouch: Are you happy!?
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Look at each other) Yes!
Nunnally: (Comes into the room) Lelouch? Is that you? What was all that chaos earlier?
Lelouch: Uh, nothing! Don't worry about it.
Jordan: Yeah, it was just Lelouch and Suzaku messing around outside. (Wink)
Ashleigh: (Shivers) NO! YAOI FANART!! (Hides behind the couch)
Suzaku: (Blushes) What are you yelling about!?
Kallen: (Tries to zone out of the conversation)
Millay: Did I just hear what I think I heard?!
Lelouch: Student President? What are you doing here?
Millay: What does it matter, Lulu? I just came in to hear about you and the new transfer student are a little closer than we thought!
Suzaku: (Blushes more) That's not what's going on!
Jordan: (Hides with Ash behind couch, listening)
(They look at each other)

Jordan: (Pops up) Then why are you blushing!!
Millay: Oh and what do we have here? Lulu?
Lulu: I have no idea. They appeared out of nowhere…
Ash: We came for the cape!
Jordan: And the big shinny robot!
Millay: Suzaku, Kallen are they friends of yours?
(Both shake their heads No)
Suzaku: So what do we do with 'em…?
Lulu: (Under his breath) Well their defiantly not staying here…
Millay (Overhears him) Good idea Lulu!
Lulu: But... but!!
Millay: No but's! You have room here!
Jordan and Ash: (Look at each other and scream YAY!!)

Jordan and Ashleigh: (Run upstairs to tell C.C the good news)
Jordan: We can stay! We can stay!
C.C: Really?
Ashleigh: Yes, now I can have the cape!
Jordan: And the Big Yellow Robot!
C.C: Uh-huh... (Pause) Wanna go swimming?

Meanwhile...

Suzaku: (Red-faced) I swear Madame President, Lelouch and I would never do THAT!
Kallen: (Successfully zoned out)
Lelouch: (Walks away to make Hot Coco or something...)
Millay: Then what's this I hear about "Particular Arrangements"?
Suzaku: What!? You saw that!?
Millay: Wow, something like that actually happened?
Suzaku: Well, yes, but- It was an accident! I would never-
Kallen: (Suddenly) THE BLACK KNIGHTS!!
Everyone else: (Stares at her)
Lelouch: (Sips his coco apathetically)
(Jordan, C.C, and Ashleigh run in wearing bathing suits. C.C is blindfolded.)
Suzaku: What are you doing?
Jordan: The pool's closed! (C.C steps towards her and she runs away from her a bit)
Ashleigh: So we're going to compensate by playing in the Clubhouse! (C.C steps towards Ashleigh and she scurries away too)
C.C: (Looks frustrated) MARCO!!
Jordan and Ashleigh: (Very loudly) POLO!!

Lelouch: Don't break anything…
(Crash)
C.C, Jordan, Ash: SORRY!
Suzaku: Will they be enrolling in our school?
Millay: I suppose so...They seem nice enough…
Nunnally: Who's staying and enrolling here??
Kallen: Two random girls that Suzaku and Lelouch found.
Nunnally: You go and find girls randomly…?
Lelouch and Suzaku: NO!
C.C: I caught Jordan!
Jordan: Marco??
C.C, Ash: POLO!!
(Jordan grabs Lelouch)
Jordan: You're it!
Lulu: I'm not playing.
Ash: (Whispers in his ear) Do it or I'll steal the cape again.
Nunnally: Go on and play!
Lulu: Fine... Marco...
C.C and Me: YOU HAVE TO PUT ON THE BLINDFOLD!

Ashleigh: (Looks around)
Lelouch: Why can't I just close my eyes to play your childish game?
Jordan: Because you'll cheat.
Lelouch: What makes you think that??
C.C: He cheats a lot. He's a sore loser too.
Lelouch: You…
Jordan: Just put on the blindfold, Lulu!
C.C: Yeah, Lulu…
Lelouch: (Narrows his eyes at C.C.)
Ashleigh: (Suddenly puts the cape on him… but BACKWARDS!) There! Now you don't need a blindfold! The massive collar makes up
for it…
Millay: These girls cosplay?
Jordan: Yeah, sure, why not!
Lelouch: (Starts swinging his arms around) Dammit, why the hell would you-
(Crash)
C.C, Jordan and Ashleigh: DON'T BREAK STUFF, LULU!

(Lulu stands back up)
Jordan: Hey you guys! Lets play Ring Around the Lulu!
(Jordan, Ash, C.C, all start. We bring in Suzaku.)
(Kallen and Millay are on their asses laughing)
Lulu: I give up…
Ash: WE WIN!!
C.C: What did we win?
Jordan: We have no idea... I want Taco Bell...Suzaku??
Suzaku: No!
Ash: Please??
Suzaku: No.
C.C: What is Taco Bell??
Jordan: Fine… Wanna play dress up?
(Ash shakes head eagerly)
(They grab Lulu and Suzaku and run upstairs)
(When they finally bring them down, Lelouch is dresses up in C.C's white outfit and Suzaku in one of Nunnally's dresses.)

Lelouch: (Sighs) How did it come to this, Suzaku?
Suzaku: (Smiles and plays with the frill on the dress)
Lelouch: (Shakes his head) Get it together!
Millay: (Messes with Suzaku's frighteningly short dress) (Wolf-Whistle) Sexay, Sexay!
Kallen: (Looks at Lelouch and tries to cover her laughter but fails miserably) (snicker)... Bondage... (snicker)
C.C: (Sees Lelouch and taps her chin. She eventually throws her hands up in the air.) I'm sorry Lelouch, but that All-Out White makes you look pudgy.
Nunnally: It's all that Pizza Hut you're always eating, Big Brother... I told you to cut back on that stuff.
Jordan: Yeah, just leave all the touching and rubbing to Suzaku…
Suzaku: (Turns around) Hey! (Realizes that when he turned around the bottom of the dress flew up and showed off his undies)
(Kallen, Millay, Jordan, C.C., and Ashleigh all collapse in laughter)
Lelouch: (Raises an eyebrow) ... Unicorns?
Suzaku: (Blush) Shut up! It's- uh- Laundry Day...!

Kallen: I think both of these outfits need something, but what??
Jordan: Bows?
Kallen: No
Ash: Lipstick?
Millay: Save that for later!
C.C : Cat ears??
Kallen, Jordan, Ash: YES!
Jordan: Hey Ash let's dress em up like Alice in Wonderland!
Lulu: Oh no you don't! (runs back up stairs)
Ash: Wait, wait, Lulu! (Trips a bit) Carry me!
(Everyone just stares while Jordan laughs)
Jordan: Now what?
(Suzaku finally goes upstairs to change after he's done playing with the dress)

Meanwhile...

Lelouch: (Leaning on the door inside his bedroom) No! No Alice in Wonderland!
Ashleigh: (Trying to push the door open) Common! Pweetie Alice!!
Suzaku: (Stares for a moment) ... (Suddenly cheerful) Can I be the Hatter?
Jordan: (Running up the stairs) NO! I AM ZEH HATTER! (Pause) You can be the White Rabbit!
Suzaku: Okay!
Ashleigh: Bunny Rabbit!
Lelouch: (Groans behind the door)
(They eventually give up on Alice in Wonderland because Lelouch refused to come out of his room and Jordan and Ashleigh- with their ADD- get bored and move on to something else.)

XxX

Author's Notes- Well that's our first chapter! It's really stupid and really random, I know, but it sets up for all the other chapters. The rest of the chapters actually have plotlines!

Author's Notes- Sorry about the "Carry me!" inside joke, but I had to put it in there! All Great and Mighty Ones!

What she said,

-Destiny