Disclaimer: I'm trying to get a job now, but I still don't think a minimum wage salary would be enough to purchase the magic of One Piece though. It might be enough to get a Wii and One Piece: Unlimited Adventure (if I ever find a copy…) Here's hoping!
Summary: Maybe the reason he's so happy and friendly is because he's scared of losing even a single friend. Truthfully, Luffy just can't stand being alone. But he never will be as long as Zoro's there. AU ZoLu.
Warnings: Two guys are going on a date in this chapter. Oh noes, teh horror!
Um, guys… am I in trouble? Do you hate me? Am I gonna get a bunch of angry letters in my mailbox? Should I hire a personal bodyguard? I'm scared… BUT! like a phoenix, this story has risen once again after a two month (now nearly three month) hiatus! Seriously, I understand if you guys are like super mad at me. I stopped right on the chapter when Zoro and Luffy were supposed to have their date. How many of you constantly checked your inbox just hoping to see this story updated? I'm so sorry! My only excuse is laziness! And school work. They are both oh so deadly when combined together.
Ja, let's get a go-go on this highly awaited chappy!
Cumbersome Tryst
(Part 2)
Knock, knock, knock came a rap on the door. The biscotti Ace was chewing on promptly snapped in half at the first knock and his eyes grew wide with a mixture of anger and apprehension at the following two.
There could be only one.
"Hai! Coming!" Luffy sang, appearing from the bathroom with a comb in hand. He danced so lightly across the living room floor that if you weren't paying close enough attention, you would swear that the younger of the D. brothers was floating.
"I still don't support this…" Ace grumbled to no one but himself, stuffing the smaller half of the Italian cookie into his mouth as to avoid saying something he shouldn't have.
Luffy opened the honey-colored apartment door with great enthusiasm and grinned even brighter than usual at his quote/unquote "date" for the evening. Zoro himself was blinded by the mere sight of the raven-haired boy's teeth. Blindly reaching forward, the would-be bushido felt around Luffy's boyish face until he grabbed his jaw and firmly (yet gently) shut it to restore his eyesight.
That's one… thought the older brother to himself, never taking his eyes away from the 'rapist' who had just attempted to molest the mouth of his innocent little brother.
"Sorry, sorry!" Luffy called in his usual cheerful tone. "I was so nervous, I couldn't stop brushing my teeth while I was getting ready!" he grinned again, causing the taller of the two to flinch backwards.
"I can tell," Zoro said flatly, placing a hand on top of the grinning little monkey's nest of soft raven fur (a.k.a. his head).
That makes two… By this time, Ace was seething at the huge HUGE amount of physical contact between the two. Had Zoro no shame!? Doing these kinds of things in front of Luffy's own brother! How dare he?! That green-haired bastard!!!
"Where're we goin'?" the bouncy junior asked without even trying to hide his excitement.
"You'll see when we get there," responded Zoro offhandedly. He most certainly wasn't used to the dating scene and truly had no idea how to act. Drawing what he deemed to be the best conclusion, Zoro decided to act like he had when he and Luffy were just friends.
When? They hadn't even gotten out of the house yet and Zoro's mind had already registered them as a couple! Wasn't he the one who was supposed to be against this?!
"Damn hormones," he bit under his breath.
"Huh?" Luffy questioned, tilting his head to the side.
"Nothing; let's just go," responded the man with seaweed-colored hair.
"Hai!" sang the younger once again, clinging to Zoro's arm affectionately.
And goddamnit, that's three! Ace immediately bolted up from the kitchen counter, a dangerous aura of flames beginning to surround him.
"But I'm warning you," Luffy stated, "There'd better be a lot of meat at this mystery place."
"What is it with your unhealthy obsession with meat?" asked the senior, only slightly concerned that the younger boy had now attached himself to him. The walk to his car would be awkward… Slowly, the man sniffed the air. "Hey, did it just get warmer in here all of a sud--"
"NIICHAN ATTACK!!!"
In the blink of an eye, the lawn-headed man was on the ground trying his hardest to get his poor neck out of Ace's lethal protection grip of death.
XXmYoWnPaCeXX
"Yosh! As you all know, it was just a little while ago that we discovered subject Roronoa Zoro was head over heels for subject Monkey D. Luffy. Quite expectedly, our quote/unquote 'captain' feels the same. A lot more acceptingly if I might add. Tonight, it is our mission to make sure that this plan to make their first official date a success is realized without fail! Do I make myself clear?!"
"Sir! Yes sir, Nami-swan!" Sanji eagerly responded without hesitation. The empowering speech his wonderful and gorgeous Nami-san had delivered had put him into full on love-love mode. Though he did kind of mute the parts that were about Zoro.
"I still don't get how I got dragged into this," Usopp mumbled to himself with his head in his hands. "Tonight was supposed to be Chopper's bath night."
"Suck it up and make the best of it!" Sanji yelled to the long-nosed teen. "If Nami-san says we're having a group meeting, then it should be your top priority to get to said group meeting!"
"Oh yeah?! I'll suck you up!" came Usopp's hasty retort. A little too hasty at that.
An uncomfortable silence fell upon Nami's living room.
"Usopp, no. Rephrase that," the blonde stated slowly.
"In any case," the bluenette heiress began, determined to get back to the subject at hand, "Does anyone even know where Luffy-kun and Mr. Bushido are supposed to be having their date?"
"Of course! I've had my top agent working on that ever since Luffy announced his little rendezvous!" Nami exclaimed proudly.
"Top agent?" pondered the curly-headed teen aloud as he stroked his chin.
"Nami-san, I think it's best if you explain." agreed the part-time cook.
The orange-haired woman pointed a finger toward her long and winding staircase. "There," she began as the sound of footsteps began echoing from the flight of steps. Vivi and the rest looked on in awe as the figure made its way to the final step, ending with a graceful stride.
Sanji's love-love level increased.
"Ooooooooh!!!!! NAMI-SWAAAAAAAAN!!!! Not only have you came up with this completely ingenious plan, but you made the number one operative in charge of gathering hidden information of this whole thing the older and much more mysterious beauty our very own librarian, Nico Robin-chwaaaaan!!!"
The raven-haired woman giggled at the introduction. "Oh, a good evening to you, Cook-san."
"Mellorine…" he sighed with content.
"Disregarding that," Nami continued, looking over to the mysteriously attractive woman, "Were you able to find out the location of Zoro and Luffy's date, Miss All-Sunday?"
Miss All-Sunday? What is this, a spy movie? Sound oddly familiar… thought the long-nosed teen watching the scenario unfold.
"No ma'am Navigator-san, I didn't find out anything at all," Robin replied with a simple smile and shrug of the shoulders.
"Great! As expected of someone of your talents," Nami nodded in approval. "Hold on; what did you just say?!"
"I said I was unable to confirm the location of the date between Captain-san and Swordsman-san."
"Robin-nee-san…" whined the beli-grabbing mastermind with tears coming to her eyes.
"You have my apologies, Navigator-san, but being the librarian was my job first if you'd forgotten." the tall woman stated as calmly as possible.
"I suppose this means we're back to square one," Vivi chuckled weakly.
"Can I go home now?" questioned Usopp.
XXlEt'sGeTrEaDyToRuMbLeXX
"You're okay, aren't ya? Nii-chan didn't leave bruises, did he?" Luffy asked with a semi-concerned tone after shutting the door to the taller man's primary mode of mechanical transportation. The two of them had just arrived at whatever place Zoro had decided to take them on their date. It look sort of like an arena.
"Damned Fire Fist…" grumbled the senior in a low tone. He gently rubbed his neck while giving off a evil scowl of death to anyone who happened to be passing by. The afflicted area was a light shade of red by this time. It was better than before, however. After the younger of the two D.'s had finally managed to pry off his older brother with the jaws of life (I.e. brotherly face of affection), Zoro's neck resembled a ghastly red in the same shade as Hester Prynne's A in The Scarlet Letter.
Rolling his eyes playfully, the raven-haired boy decided that his friend (because they were still in that awkward phase between 'just friends' and 'boyfriends') was more than okay and merrily bounced up to the front of the huge dome-shaped arena. Grumbling a few more obscenities, Zoro followed behind at a moderate pace.
And gosh, he just couldn't help but notice the shape of Luffy's… well, butt. It was like a little plum, the way it was shaped. The way it swayed back and forth as its owner bounced around and around seemed to hypnotize the green-haired man as he barely continued to walk forward in a straight line.
It appeared as if Luffy had opted to switch into a whole new outfit between school and the time Zoro said he would pick him up. The Straw Hat teen now wore a pair of tight (but not too tight) dark blue jeans perfect for keeping his bare legs from shaking in the brisk night air and also for showing off that nice piece of Devil Fruit stored in them.
Zoro tore his eyes away as drool began to form around his mouth. He glared at the giggling school girls who had noticed his staring and they scampered on their merry way like good little yaoi fangirls. In his glaring, he managed to lose his sense of direction and bumped smack dab into Luffy.
"Geez, Zoro, you're acting like a zombie! I stopped to wait up for you and you nearly run me over!" Luffy exclaimed good-naturedly, helping the older youth stand. A small hand idly brushed against a firm bicep for a fraction of a second. Both men blushed softly, but otherwise completely ignored the contact. "What kinda place is this anyway?" Luffy coughed, wanting to get back on the matter at hand.
"You still haven't realized it yet?" Zoro asked with a slightly puzzled tone. Really, it should've been obvious even before they made it into the parking lot. It was a lot of work just to get tickets on such short notice too! But he had somehow gotten them into his pocket thanks to the carelessness of a blue-haired man who kept exclaiming how 'SUPA' the match of the century would be. Of course, Zoro had tried to give them back, but the man (he found out his name was Franky) had bought three so he could go with a couple of friends only to find out that those friends of his had backstage passes and didn't require two extra tickets. Also, the clerk was being a real a-hole that day and wouldn't give him a refund.
Long story short, Zoro got those tickets with little hassle.
"ANIKI!!!"
His face twitched at the familiar name.
"Yo, Johnny! Yosaku!" Luffy replied waving back at the inseparable pair. "What're you guys doing at this Mystery Place?"
"Mystery Place?" questioned Yosaku. "You mean the wrestling dome? Johnny and I come here every Friday night."
"It's like our thing," Johnny added. "But we've never seen you around here, Luffy-aniki."
"And they're without Nami-aneki and the other's too…" stated the bald man suggestively.
"Aniki, is it possible that… With Luffy-aniki…?"
"Don't go jumping to conclusions when you won't even admit to your own relationship!" Zoro snapped at them, flushing a bit.
"But we aren't dating!!" the two responded in unison.
"Ooh! Zoro, let's hurry! It looks like something super cool is about to happen!" shouted the hyper young lad as he once again attached himself Zoro's arm. "Bye Johnny! Bye Yosaku! I hope you guys have fun on your date too!" he yelled, bulldozing his way inside as people flew off in every possible direction.
"For the last time, WE AREN'T DATING!!!" Johsaku yelled simultaneously. The people who weren't bulldozed to the side, turned to give them odd looks.
"Ahh! Johnny, all these people are staring at us!" Yosaku gasped, clinging to the front of his partner's shirt.
"Don't worry about them," the man in sunglasses (even at night) responded softly, grasping the other man's chin. "You need only but to look at me, partner."
"Oh, John-chan!" sighed the other.
The fangirls from earlier giggled once more, snapping pictures with their ever-convenient camera phones.
Inside the large showground, Luffy stared in awe at the huge crowd of people. Everyone was screaming and shouting on opposite sides of the dome at the two burly men circling each other in the center. One was a man dressed up as a clown and with a nose so bright red that even tomatoes were jealous. The other was a man with long black hair and blue-ish body paint on his skin and teeth that looked as if they were about as sharp as a sharks. A slender woman walked seductively into the ring with card held up reading 'Round 1.' At the sound of the bell, the men charged at each other.
"Zoroooo!" Luffy shouted with childish enjoyment, "Why didn't you tell me we were going to a wrestling match!?"
"Because Yosaku told you that when we were still outside," Zoro responded under his breath.
"SUGOI!!"
Tsuzuku…
Ending Omake
Zoro: Two. Months.
Icebender: Ah, Zoro! I see you made it just fine.
Zoro: Sixty. Days.
Icebender: (nervously) Um, we're out of sake if that's what you mean…
Zoro: IT TOOK YOU TWO FUCKING MONTHS TO GET MY DATE WITH LUFFY AND YOU THINK SAKE WILL MAKE IT BETTER!?
Icebender: I… I had it imported…
Zoro: Nothing even happened yet! You divied this into three parts at the last minute, didn't you?!
Icebender: Lu-ffy! Control your dog, please!
Zoro: Give me one good reason why I shouldn't gut you and it sure as hell better be a damn good one!
Icebender: (thinking frantically)
Zoro: Well?! (draws Wadou)
Icebender: Dead authors can't update.
Zoro: (sighs and puts Wadou away) Goddamn you, Icebender…
Icebender: Please review all my love-lovies! I promise not to take two months next time. Please? At least 5?