Catch 22

AN: A double bind/catch 22 is a dilemma in communication in which a person receives two or more conflicting messages and one message denies the other, a situation in which the person will be put in the wrong however they respond, and the person can't comment on the conflict, or resolve it, or opt out of the situation.

AN2: I am not sure how I feel about this at all. I really want some feedback on it, cause it's way out of the ordinary and not at all how I originally envisioned writing this couple. I doubt I will ever do something like this again, but then again, we all know I have no control over my muse at this point. She's totally calling the shots. Obviously.

He couldn't come out of this ahead. It had taken him two days to figure that out, and now he was no better for it. No matter what he did here, he was going to lose.

He supposed that should make the choice easier.

His best course of action was to avoid it. Avoid the problem at all costs, and the choice could be put off. He wouldn't have to act if he could put it off long enough and then maybe the problem would just go away.

But the problem was Theo, and he showed no signs of going anywhere. If his goal was avoiding Theo, then he was making up impossible goals. Theo was everywhere; they worked together, they fought together, they lived together… Theo was everywhere. Even in Casey's head.

He was the voice in the back of his mind telling him to straighten his posture, the common sense that told him to ice his ankle when he pulled it, the anal retentive tendency that made him wipe down the shower when he was finished. The fact that Theo told him to do all those things out loud was just an added annoyance to the way he could predict the words perfectly in his mind.

The only thing he could come up with was that Theo had made him do it. Maybe if he could blame Theo, avoiding him wouldn't give him the sick, knotted feeling in the pit of his stomach that it currently was.

Was it Theo's eyes that made him feel guilty? His eyes, burning into Casey's back at all times. Those eyes were freaking unavoidable. Casey had them memorized.

It was ridiculous, really. It was Theo's fault. It had to be. Theo must have done something because Casey couldn't accept that he'd just let Theo get to him. Theo was responsible for all of it; he'd gotten inside Casey's head and made things so horribly confusing. Casey couldn't have been the one who did that. He couldn't have let himself fall so drastically without warning for this young Asian man was OCD and attitude. That was the unsolvable, unanswerable question.

How had he fallen for Theo without even noticing it?

It wasn't the only question tearing him apart, either. There were other ones, like what had made him kiss Theo in the moonlight? Or why had Theo responded like he'd never been kissed before? And why had they gotten so terribly angry with each other when it was over?

They'd been angry enough to kick the hell out of each other. Casey had barely walked away. His lip had been so swollen he couldn't close his mouth, and his eye hurt like hell. His only consolation was the limp in Theo's step, and the bandage around his wrist.

This of course had provoked many questions from the group. Mutual answers of "I fell" were not going to subdue them.

Casey wanted to hit him again. Every time he looked at him, he was filled with such rage and such conflicting amusement that he wanted to do something very, very violent to the blue ranger. And he could see it on Theo's face, too. He was angry and hurt and volatile, but somewhere behind those dark eyes there was this glee and giddiness of a schoolgirl.

The crossed wires and mixed signals were beginning to drive Casey insane.

So he avoided them like there was no tomorrow. No matter what he did to try and fix this, he and Theo would never be friends again. And if he fixed it another way, and they became something much more complicated and confusing, Casey knew he'd just screw that up in the end and he'd loose Theo's respect on top of his friendship.

There was no way to win, and therefore no reason to act on any of the impulses he felt towards the smaller boy.

Unfortunately, Theo wasn't going to let him get away so easily, and Casey found this out when he was slammed up against a brick wall so hard that the wind was knocked out of him. Had it not been for Theo's little but strong hands holding his shoulders against the wall, he could have collapsed right there.

"I'm sick of this!" A rattled Theo declared as Casey gasped for breathe. "Either kiss me or slug me, but stop trying to act like I don't exist, Casey!"

Casey opened his mouth to answer, but the air had only just returned to his lungs and he couldn't get the words out. Instead, a strange sort of smile rose to his lips as he though about Theo's ultimatum, and he couldn't decide which one he'd do if he had the breath.

"Hey!" Theo shook him, his face still a mix of aggression and strife, and Casey reached over and smacked him gently to get him to stop. Theo let him go, and Casey slumped over.

"Not so hard next time, okay?" Casey pleaded, taking air into his lungs and finding his voice.

"Next time?" Theo wondered, his voice softening and picking up, and Casey was annoyed that that was the part of the sentence he had chosen to hang onto.

Casey managed to stand back up and lean back against that wall somewhat gracefully, and Theo crossed his arms over his chest sullenly. Like he had somehow been foiled because Casey retained some of his unnatural ease.

God, they were acting like children. He'd never acted so ridiculous in his entire life, and that was saying a lot because he'd done some pretty strange things. Theo just made him want to be outrageous. Theo provoked that response from him without even trying, and all Theo was doing was reacting to Casey.

He supposed they were mutually responsible for each others stupidity.

"Do you want me to kiss you?" Casey demanded when Theo said nothing. Theo looked at him like a dear in the headlights. "Yes or no Theo."

Theo's body said yes, but his mouth was not so enthusiastic. "No."

And Casey was torn. Torn between doing what Theo told him to do and doing what Theo wanted him to do, which apparently were completely opposite. He was caught between Theo and a brick wall, both literally and metaphorically.

So he just did what he wanted to do, instead of paying any attention to Theo. He smacked him across the face, and when Theo was in the middle of retaliating, he smashed their lips together. Theo's punch swung his arm over Casey's shoulder, and Casey managed to hold onto the back of Theo's neck long enough for Theo to calm down and kiss him and it seemed to be over.

He was in the most awkward position, knees bent and half bending over just to reach Theo's lips. It was another confusing mix of emotions as his legs told him to stand up and let go and his lips told him to continue his assault on Theo's mouth. It was his legs that eventually won out, and as he pulled away Theo's breathless lips hit his neck and he shivered.

The two foot height difference was back in-between them and Casey was ready for whatever Theo threw at him. Nothing happened in the aftermath of that second kiss, though. That one had gone decidedly better than the first.

Theo just looked at him, lips swollen and eyes revealing his glee just like before, even if his body language was weird and hunched. Casey wondered if his own face was any kind of reflection of that.

"This isn't going to work, you know." Casey told him after a moment of silence.

"How do you know?" Theo asked, reaching out to dust off Casey's shoulder.

"It never does, with me." He didn't realized how sad that made him until he said it, and how pathetic it must have made him sound.

"Ever had something like this before?" Theo smirked for the first time since their first kiss, and Casey mirrored him.

"Decisive no." Casey replied, reaching over and fixing some of Theo's ruffled hair.

It was weirdly enticing, these acts of tenderness muted by words of harsh realities. This fiery passion echoed by outbursts of rage at what? At their own indecisiveness? It was, by far, the weirdest relationship he'd ever had with another human being.

"Don't decide how it ends before it starts." Theo advised. And he punched Casey lightly in the gut for good measure.

Clearly, Theo had made up his mind for him. And he had no say at this point. After all, he obviously had no clue what kinds of signals he must be sending to get that in return. How was he supposed to read between the lines and figure out what he really wanted? It seemed that was Theo's job, and Casey's job would be to do the same for Theo.

Simple, yet unbelievably obtuse.

And that pretty much summed up Casey and Theo's entire relationship from that point on.