A/N: This chapter attacked me! Okay, that's a lie. I did have to beat it with a spiked club to force it out though, and it shows, but I did what I could at the moment. Once I (hopefully) become a good writer, I am redoing this entire bitch! 'points at her story' You hear that, you piece of shit?! You're going to have to obey me eventually! 'yelps' Hey! No biting!

I had way too much fun writing angry and ranting JD, so he's probably on the OOC side. Also, I am growing to love creating banter between JD and Cox, partly because it's surprisingly easy, and partly because it amuses me... Of course, I am pretty easily amused. A lot more cussing is in this, too, but that's to help set the mood...

There's a bit of sappy JD&Turk love, but I swear it could fit in with canon. 'twitch' I loathe writing fluff... but I did it quick like a razorbla- I mean Band-Aid.

Disclaimer: 'hostile stare' All of you can go to hell...

Warnings: Mild Slash, Language, and JDA (I finally noticed how much I gratuitously abuse his psyche)

Italics – JD's thoughts

Bold – JD's daydreams

Chapter Five

There is a certain amount of decorum that is required when working at a hospital, but unfortunately, doctors are still human. Sometimes tempers flare and unpleasant incidents may occur...

My mind races frantically as I try to come up with a way to prevent what is currently unfurling right in front of my eyes.

Turk throws another punch, but this time Cox sees it coming. He ducks under the fist that swings towards his head and lowers his shoulder into the surgeon's chest; shoving the man hard up against the nurses' station. I wince at the startled cry of pain from Turk as his back connects viciously with the sharp edge of the counter.

Ooo, that had to hurt! Maybe I should just let them rough each other up for a bit... No! Dr. Cox would definitely be suspended again for fighting with a co-worker and he might end up hurting Turk badly. Sure, my Chocolate Bear can hold his own in a fight, but Cox is in a lot better shape than he is. Sorry, C-Bear, I'd never admit that to you, but it's true... This is accomplishing nothing! Get out of your head and do something! Now, Dorian!

"I can't get an erection!"

There is something unnatural about the complete and total silence that falls over such a crowded area; there are not even the somewhat comforting, quiet murmurs that you hear at funerals.

Damn it, JD, you did not just shout that out loud for everyone to hear...

"You know, it's probably a side effect of the medications I'm taking..." I clear my throat at the humiliation that washes over me, and then gaze vacantly at my best friend and my mentor.

At least the blood can still rush to my face. Okay, remember how to breathe... This isn't the most embarrassing moment of my life; just really, really close to it.

The two men stare at me with dumfounded expressions.

Turk is motionless; his arms paused in his attempt to force the attending physician into a headlock, and Dr. Cox is straining away from the hold, not allowing it to become secure around his neck. His body is tensed up, and he is turned slightly at the waist with his clenched left hand cocked back in obvious preparation to strike the surgeon directly in the stomach.

I jump at the hand that suddenly clasps onto my shoulder and glance at Dr. Kelso; the look on his face is condescending, but I detect the faintest trace of sympathy from the older man.

"Dr. Dorian, I realize how serious such a condition must be for you, but this is really a matter that should be taken up with your psychiatrist, don't you think? Not in the middle of my hospital. Okay, Sport?"

"Of course, sir." I manage a taut smile at the Chief of Medicine as he removes his hand.

"And you two," he directs a glare at the men that remain tangled up in immobilized combat like bizarre, living statues, "roughhouse with each other on your own time!"

Apparently having said all that he had intended to; Kelso makes his normal, abrupt exit from the area.

I immediately return my attention to Dr. Cox and Turk.

Please let the information about Mr. Peeps be important enough that they will stop fighting. Ithink it's that important... Besides, Turk never stays angry for long, and Cox should be just a little preoccupied with that news after what I just did to him...

"Wow, that sucks, V-Bear." Turk straightens his stance uncomfortably, and to my relief he releases my mentor.

Dr. Cox turns his head back to stare off to the side of my best friend for a second, before angling his fist away from Turk's stomach and socking him solidly across the jaw. A look of wounded shock appears on the surgeon's face as his neck twists alarming to the side from the impact.

"Damn it, Dr. Cox!" I launch myself into action and latch onto the man's arm, hauling back with as much strength as I can muster; which is a surprising amount since I am trying to avert any more damage from being done to one of the people I care about the most. I even manage to move him back a couple of steps.

"Now we are even, Gandhi." Cox levels a strict but relatively calm stare at Turk, who is rubbing gingerly at his jaw.

Turk's hand falls, his mouth drops open indignantly, and then he scoffs.

"Like hell we are! After what you did to JD?! We are so not even!"

"Yes, Turk! Yes, you are! You hit him and he hit you. That's a fair exchange!" I thrust a finger at Cox as he opens his mouth to speak, and hiss threateningly at him before he has the chance to voice a comment. "You! Shut up for once in your life!"

A very scary expression instantly materializes on the older doctor's face, and he roughly shakes my hands off of his forearm in response to my heated words.

With all the rage that is flowing through my body at the moment, there is absolutely no question about continuing my tirade.

I definitely need to clear a few things up.

"Alright, both of you shut up!" I snap as I notice the satisfied smirk that Turk flashes at Dr. Cox, and it quickly fades into a look of hurt as he pouts in my direction. I turn to face him completely. "Turk, I know you're upset because of how messed up my mind is, but you have no right to blame Dr. Cox for it!"

Without delay, he lips start to form a protest that I cut off harshly.

"Let me fucking finish."

It's kind of entertaining being this mad...

"Cox may have triggered it, yeah, but he sure as hell didn't cause me to have this condition. Me and that fucking shrink I hate so much have been over this, and we actually agree that I have shown mild symptoms of schizoaffective disorder my entire Goddamn life!"

I use my fingers as I tick off the examples.

"Let's see, there are the daydreams that venture on hallucinations. The often scattered way I have of speaking and thinking. My total lack of feeling any emotion in situations where I sure as hell should feel something, and the way the world crashes down on me when everything does finally sink in."

My tone lowers in derision, and I feel a stab of self-loathing as I carry on with my rant.

"Or, how about the fact that I have never even tried to do any of the important things that I want to do in my life. Hell, I'm almost convinced that becoming a doctor is a fucking fluke."

I ignore the startled, wide-eyed stares from the both of them, as well as from most of the hospital staff that have gathered in the vicinity to watch the show.

I attempt to drive my point home.

"And if anybody deserves to punch Dr. Cox, that person is me, Turk, not you!" I don't even try to stop myself from crossing my arms over my chest in a distinctly Coxian manner. "Do you understand that?!"

"Yes, JD." Turk is now gazing at the floor guiltily and looking utterly miserable.

I hate seeing him like this.

I drop my arms abruptly, step up to my best friend, and wrap myself snugly around him; burying my cheek against his neck.

"I'm sorry for yelling at you, Super Chocolate Bear. You know I love you..." I whisper in his ear, adding as much affection to my voice as I can.

"I know, Vanilla Bear, I know..." His reciprocation of the hug is almost painfully tight. "I love you, too."

"I really do na-ot want to be watching interracial, gay theater."

The dry words from behind us rudely interrupt the bittersweet moment that my Brown Bear and I are sharing.

I let go of Turk and swivel around slowly; fury once again clouding my features.

"And you, Dr. Cox! Don't think I am so dimwitted that I haven't noticed that you have been blaming yourself. You are not such a special person that I would try to kill myself over you, no matter what delusions you feed your over-bloated ego. Fuck! A hangnail might have been what pushed me over the edge!" I lean in close to the other man and state the following sentences laced with a stinging malice that I had no idea I could produce. "Let me tell you just one more thing. You make a God-awful martyr and it's fucking pathetic."

That is definitely not the smartest thing I have ever said. Stay strong, Dorian, and maintain the fierce glare!

I do manage to keep up the glare, but I can feel my mental defenses start to crumble as I anxiously wait for his reaction and watch a facial tick jump violently in the muscles of his right cheek.

Oh God, I just basically snarled a very insulting rant at Dr. Cox! This is not a good way to ensure my survival and personal safety...

"I think we do need to have a little chat, Priya, seeing as how we didn't get much talking done earlier."

I flinch involuntarily when Cox seizes my left bicep and begins to drag me none-too-gently down the hall.

"In private." My captor mentions to me offhandedly.

"JD!" Turk cries out in alarm after us, and I arch my neck around to give him what I hope is a reassuring grin as I call back to him.

"It's alright, Turk! I'll be fine!"

Aaagh! Dr. Cox actually wants to talk to me! I am being led to my death!

I cringe and let out a small gasp when my bare skin comes into contact with an icy surface as I am considerately pushed down into a rigid, metal chair.

Dr. Cox carefully pulls the steel manacles over my wrists, tenderly attaches them to the armrests, and then kneels down to repeat the gesture with my ankles. Once he is finished, he looks up at me with such happiness and contentment that my breath catches in my throat. He voice is peaceful as he speaks to me.

"Now, Newbie, I want you to be completely honest with me..." His eyes are earnest as he stares at me with barely concealed longing. "How do you want me to do this?"

"Uh..." It is the only sound I can manage to choke out.

Very eloquent, JD.

"Do what?"

That was better. Two syllables.

The other man smiles widely, and his countenance takes on a disturbingly out-of-place, dreamy appearance.

"Don't be coy, Zoraida. This is something I have wanted to do for a very long time..." His tone is undeniably suggestive.

"What?!"

Damn it! I'm regressing!

The first trace of irritation shows, and he draws his eyebrows together at my response.

"There are ma-han-ny ways that I can do this, but if you don't choose, I will, and you may not like it, Newbie."

"I'm pretty sure I'll like anything that you decide to do to me, Dr. Cox." I moan his name out huskily, and stare with unrestrained desire at the sexy man that is still crouching in front of me; his large hands resting firmly on my exposed thighs.

"Fair enough."

I can already tell that this is going to be a very good fantasy... Wait a minute! Why is he holding a knife?!

"Hey, Dr. Cox... what's up with the knife?" A bolt of unease races down my spine as I focus on the sharp object that is now being held loosely in his hand, and the way the light glints off of the blade menacingly.

"You're right; you did already try that one..." He sets the knife down onto a table to my right and then lifts up another item from it to examine. "Maybe an icepick, then? Ooo, or a hammer? Although, I suppose I could strangle you... I think I would greatly enjoy that, and it would be a little more personal."

"Um... aren't you planning to have sex with me?"

He laughs.

"Newbie, Newbie, Newbie..." The older man shakes his head in amusement as he repeats my name slowly, and then glances at me in sudden, intense annoyance. "No! I am going to kill you."

He sighs in pleasure.

"Finally..."

"If you murder me, people will know!" I fling the words accusingly at Cox.

Why did I have to be naked in a daydream like that?! My mind is a cruel, vicious tease!

I halt at once when I realize exactly where we are and struggle to break free from the restrictive hold the doctor has on me.

I am not ready for this! Hell, I just found out about it today!

Dr. Cox merely squeezes my arm harder at my attempts to flee back down the stairs, causing a distressed yelp to slip from between my lips, but also calming me down somewhat. The feeling of anger welling up in my chest is becoming eerily familiar to me, and I don't fight back the scowl that contorts my face as I stare at him with blatant disapproval.

"I am not ready to do this yet, Dr. Cox, and you wouldn't be pushing so hard with any other patient. Why do you have to be so fucking mean to me?" I say the words evenly, adding emphasis to the ones that I consider to be the most important.

"I thought this was just a hangnail, Newbie." He cocks his head to the side and studies me with false confusion.

Damn him!

At a loss for how I should respond to his mild statement, I do the only thing that suggests itself as I gaze at his lips.

I bend forward and glide my tongue, from corner to corner, over the mouth that is currently trying its best to drive me crazy.

The hand that is on me clamps down brutally and I wrench myself as far away from the other man as he allows; gritting my teeth at the agony that flares up in the mistreated limb.

"I have always known that you are a sadistic bastard, but you really like to hurt me, don't you?"

"You have to stop doing things like that, right now."

"No." I fidget with irritated discomfort in his grip. "If you are going to try to force me to deal with something I don't want to, I am going to make you deal with something that you don't want to."

I try to pay no attention to just how childish my assertion sounds even to my own ears as I am unwillingly pulled closer to Dr. Cox.

"Listen up, Kyra, because your newfound testicles seem to be impairing your judgment and your perceptions. I never said that I didn't want to," with a grimace, he spits out the next word at me, "deal with this, whatever the hell this is." He waves his free hand around in a vague motion.

"Oh really? Then you have no problem letting the mother of your child know exactly what happened in the on-call room?" Renewed pain shoots up my arm. "Christ! Will you let go of me?! It's already going to bruise!"

"So, Newbie, you're planning to tell Jordan in order to get back at me?" The light irises that are focused on me darken and his tone is dangerous as he inclines his head nearer to mine. Such proximity is now extremely unnerving, and I resist crossing my eyes to look at him.

"No! I am not a home wrecker! Okay, maybe just a little with the whole on-call room thing... but I wouldn't do anything to hurt Jack!" I exclaim; sincerely offended. I disregard the way the older man recoils as though I had slapped him. "I was just trying to prove that you aren't as okay with this as you claim to be!"

The injured expression on Dr. Cox's face, and the way the lines around his eyes crease with worry, let me know that I had hit the issue directly at its core.

No big surprise there. I know he loves Jack, and things are going better between him and Jordan than they ever have... God, everything can get so fucked up in such a short amount of time. What was I thinking...? Truth is, I wasn't, at all, and it was purely selfish on my part... Damn it, Dorian, you have to fix this!

"Dr. Cox..." I sigh and look up at him imploringly from my overly-slouched position. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have used your guilt against-"

My apology is broken off as firm lips are crushed down on mine, and Cox uses his weight to shuffle me back until I am pressed up against the wall of the stairwell. Hands slide up to delve into my hair and caress at my scalp.

Yes! He let go of my arm!

I am caught up with indecision on whether I should tilt back against the fingers massaging my head or lean forward to increase the pressure on my lips; both sensations feel so good.

Luckily, I don't have to make up my mind. The Irish man opens his mouth, takes a hold of my bottom lip and suckles on it, causing me to arch back into his touch with a breathless moan. He follows my movement, pushing harder against me, and a light vibration runs through my skull as his knuckles collide with the unyielding surface behind me.

He is kissing me! Quit being an idiot and kiss him back, JD!

Provoked by the exasperation I feel at my own lack of involvement, I dart my tongue out, stroke his slightly-chapped upper lip, and then dip inside of his mouth to taste him.

The flavor I encounter creates a frown on my face that I am only dimly conscious of.

Having literally no room to relocate myself, I reach my hands up in between his arms and clasp his jaw. I pause a bit in distraction and rub my fingertips over the rough stubble that covers the area, before I make an effort to urge him away from me.

After a lingering pull on the pink flesh that he is molesting in a way that makes me want to grab onto him and force him to continue, Cox severs the contact and moves back, but not very far.

I choose his left eye, which I like better for some reason, to focus on and aim a glare at.

All those romance novels lie. It's impossible to look into someone's eyes when you're this close without flicking your own back and forth like a twitchy junky...

"You have been drinking, and I am guessing fairly recently, at that." I growl in a low tone at him. "Did you sneak alcohol into the hospital?"

"Of course not, Rochelle." He admonishes, and then smirks at me. "I drank a lot before I came to the hospital, and I have to admit, I'm still a li-it-itle tipsy."

Goddamn it.

"You can't come to work drunk, you hypocritical bast-"

As I talk, he trails his right hand down from my hair, over my cheek, and then slips his index finger into my mouth to shut me up.

"Quiet."

He thrusts the digit in and out along my tongue; his own lips parted, and he watches the action with so much intensity that a violent shudder courses through my body. I constrict my mouth and suck vigorously on his finger, licking playfully at the rough skin, and look at him coyly. My lips curve into pleased smile when I hear him groan softly.

Visual aid is fun!

The expression of lust unexpectedly drops from his features, and he gazes at me solemnly; dragging the tip of his finger over my lower lip before removing it from me.

What the fuck did I do now?!

"You really can't...?" He seems unable to decide on how to phrase his question.

Oh. That...

"Yeah..." I look to the side for a moment, and then back at him with an awkward smile twisting at my mouth.

He is definitely not the person I want to be talking to about this.

"As soon as my dosage is figured out, I'm sure Mr. Peeps will be just fine." I nod and try to radiate more confidence than I truly possess when it comes to this, uh, sensitive subject.

"Why didn't you say anything, Newbie?"

"After what happened the last time I tried to talk to you about something like this? You laughed at me, damn it! So forgive me if I didn't feel I could confide in you."

"Christ, JD..." He buries his fingers into his hair and tugs at it in frustration. "This is a different situation, and you know it. It's not just about your 'peep' being on the fritz."

An emotional buzz races through me, the same way it always does, at the rare sound of my actual name coming from the other man's lips.

"And I know that you look up to me like I'm some kind of perfect-"

I snap out of the distracted trance I had fallen into when he said my initials.

"Hey!" I pull my hands from his face and arrange them into a 'holdup' gesture. "Perfect is not a word I would ever use to describe you, Dr. Cox!"

"Let me finish, Fatima."

The quiet and controlled tone he grates the words out in is more frightening than all of the times he has yelled at me, and I comply; dropping my arms at my sides.

"You look up to me, and you go out of your way to do anything to try to please me like an annoying, abused puppy; no matter how many Goddamn times I kick you."

He doesn't understand at all! Every single one of his relationships must have been completely dysfunctional.

"I didn't do that to please you, Cox." My glare and voice grow more hostile when he snorts in amusement and lifts an eyebrow at me. "I did it for me. Because I wanted to. You think I can't enjoy something just because I can't get off?"

That sounded a little more manly in my head...

Feeling surer of myself from my verbal affirmation, and from selectively ignoring my mental comment, I raise my hands back up to his jaw and pet teasingly over his prickly facial hair.

I wink at him and murmur in what I feel is a seductive manner.

"I love when you're all scruffy... and you shouldn't listen to Elliot about using 'Just for Men', because I think the grey looks good on you."

Wrong thing to say! Take it back!

"It's barely noticeable. No, on second thought, you can't even see the-"

Dr. Cox growls at me, looking unhappier at each word that I say. Finally, he just takes a hold of my gown, yanks me against him, and reclaims my mouth.

I slide my hands down his neck and dig my fingers into the muscles of his shoulders, grinning when he quickly parts from me to nip sharply at my chin in retaliation and then promptly returns to assault my lips with even more fervor.

I can't help but compare the way the older man actually kisses to how he did in my hallucinations, and I find myself giddily thrilled that my mind had been so close to the truth. The only difference I can detect is how much more attention he gives to my lips, and I am certainly not planning to complain.

As if to prove my unspoken observation, he interrupts the clash of our tongues and brushes a conflictingly tender lick along the side of my mouth, his lips grasping and drawing lightly on the skin there, and then he nibbles across my swollen bottom lip. I shiver at the oral fondling, my breath coming out in rapid gasps, and he plunges back into me; once again firm and demanding.

Dichotomy. That's the onlyway to describe Dr. Cox; rough and gentle, cruel and kind... And sex, yes, I think sex is an accurate description of him, too... No, I don't care that it's not an adjective, brain!

He is holding his lower body away from me, which is probably his way of showing consideration for my circumstances, but it still causes me to feel a spark of aggravation. I position my right thigh and deliberately shove up against him, earning me a jagged intake of breath from the man as I rub at his hardness. He jerks his head away from me and halts all movement; his jaw clenched and his eyes closed.

"Newbie." His voice is gruff and filled with warning.

"You have a very impressive recovery time for someone your age, Dr. Cox." I smirk; this time I am trying to piss him off and I'm not disappointed.

His hands seize my wrists tightly and he pins them up above my head, before grinding his hips viciously against mine. I arc myself up into his movements and watch the man through heavy-lidded eyes, searching for a difference between anger and passion, but I don't find much of a distinction.

I wonder if I could get him to do anything sexual just by taunting him. Must be tested later...

I match the undulations of his body and strive to escape from the hold he has on my arms; not in a genuine effort to get loose, but because I have never found it gratifying to keep someone captive when they aren't even attempting to get away. I also have the idea that the other man might take as much pleasure in subjugating me physically as he already does mentally.

A feeling of triumph rushes over me when, with a gathered surge of strength, I manage to force my arms almost a couple of inches from the wall.

For a second, anyway, then they are slammed back against the hard barrier and razor-sharp jolts of agony spike through my body from my restrained limbs.

My mind temporarily fades to white, and I cry out in pained rage.

"Shit! Fuck your mother, you whoring son of a bitch!"

After my outburst, I pry the eyes open that I don't remember closing and stare at a motionless Dr. Cox, who is staring right back at me; startled.

"That is some re-he-hely horrible dirty talk there, Deyanira." He regains control of his expression, but then frowns as he releases me and slowly withdraws his hands. "Fuck."

I glance down.

Yep, I'm thinking that might be my blood on his hands.

"Fuck!" He repeats the curse louder this time; tone angry now instead of mildly surprised. "With all of the times that I ranted at you for being an idiot, I go and do something like this."

My arms feel like they are frozen above my head. I watch impassively as the doctor reaches for and cautiously lowers the unresisting appendages down to my waist. He turns them over and mutters another oath at the blood-drenched bandages that are revealed; the injuries must have been bleeding for a while now to have soaked through the dressings.

How could I not notice something like this? How could Cox not notice? Are we selectively colorblind?!

"We need to get you back to your room."

I wonder if he would get mad if I told him he was pointing out the obvious... No, wait, I know he would.

The older man places a hand under my left elbow, curling his fingers up around the joint, and I, feeling a bit dizzy, obediently allow him to guide me down the stairs.

My mind flickers briefly to my medical knowledge and I halt; cocking my head to the side as I study the scarlet coverings. I am morbidly fascinated at seeing so much of my own blood, and it has a blurring effect on my thoughts.

"You said I did this three weeks ago. We weren't that rough; the wounds should be healed enough by now to handle it better than this." I look away from my arms and down at Cox, who is standing on the step below mine.

"Add two and two together, Newbie." He meets my curious gaze with impatience and speaks rapidly. "When you were not properly sedated during your psychotic break, you disrupted the normal healing process with the damage you caused by fighting against the restraints. Only a week ago you managed to tear some of your sutures open, and as a doctor, I should have been constantly aware of that."

He scowls and turns back around; tugging firmly on my arm.

"Don't beat yourself up about it, Dr. Cox, you have been drinking, and you can't be held accountable for not acting like a medical professional. After all, we are only in a hospital."

Turn the insolence off! This is not the time to be provoking him, Dorian! Doing it in the showers was stupid, but we are in a fucking stairwell! Abort!

I hold my breath and wait for punishment that is never delivered; he simply remains silent and pulls me after him down the stairs, then out into the hallway.

I groan quietly as we exit the softly-lit passage and walk directly into a fluorescent hell; the floors considerately buffed to a glossy shine in order to provide extra-glaring refraction.

Dr. Cox has light sensitivity... I am beginning to understand more and more why he is so cranky all of the time.

"Hey, J-Dawg, hold up!"

I make a face as I hear the deep shout and the sound of jogging footsteps from behind me. Automatically, I start to reduce the speed that I am moving at and Cox jerks my arm roughly, causing me to stumble to keep my footing.

I guess being nice to me was only a stair thing...

A hand grabs onto my right shoulder and steadies me. I glance over at Todd as he falls into step beside me and locks onto my eyes with a sad, empathetic stare.

"Dude, I wanted to apologize for earlier; I didn't mean to make fun of you. I just heard about your penis, and I would like to give you a sympathy five to make it up to you." He tilts his head a little to the side, and hesitantly raises his hand into high-five stance.

"Todd!" I hold my bloodied forearms up at him and my voice is slightly squeaky when I reply. "I'm a little busy right now!"

"You're right. Sorry." He takes his hand away from my shoulder, lifts both up in front of himself in a contrite manner, and then his tone returns to normal. "I'll come back for it later!"

Todd points a finger and nods at me with a relaxed smile, before veering off towards another hallway without a look back.

"Hey... Do you think The Todd has autism?" I slide my eyes to focus on Cox.

"I know that he's an idiot. Come on."

He obtains a stronger grip on my elbow and hauls me into a room to our left.

"You know, it's not exactly painless when you do that." I mutter as he releases my arm when we come to a stop by the bed, and I collapse onto the mattress gratefully. I am beginning to feel more lightheaded, unsteady, and nauseous.

"Do what, Newbie?" He questions disinterestedly as he heads over to a supply cart and wheels it to within reaching distance of me.

"Asshole."

"Oh no. Vivianne, are you sulking now?"

I remain quiet and glower at his back as he walks to the sink to wash his hands.

Maybe just a little...

Once he is finished, the doctor returns to my side. He pulls on some latex-free gloves, grabs a pair of medical scissors from the cart, and then starts to cut through the bloody bandage on my right forearm.

I watch his actions intently.

I am still deeply irritated by the fact that the other man is intoxicated, and I consider, for a moment, using the call button so I can ask a nurse for a different doctor, just to demonstrate how much.

He removes the soiled gauze wrap, places it into a red bio-hazard bag, and begins to carefully peel up the dressing from the wound. My eyes widen is surprise as the injury is gradually revealed. It is not even close to a straight line; mostly jagged and curved with numerous starting incisions, and the flesh in between the stitches is a vivid, swollen red.

I think I'm going to be sick... Keep it together, Dorian.

"You're doing that arm first just to fuck with me, aren't you?" I hiss vehemently at Dr. Cox.

"Not everything is about your feelings, Shayla." He grins at me, but it swiftly fades into a somber expression, and he doesn't look even slightly annoyed when he states the obvious to me. "The more serious wound needs to be treated first, Newbie."

Breaking eye contact, he refocuses on his task; cleaning and sterilizing my arm, applying skin closure tape to the areas that are pulling tautly at the sutures, pushing another dressing gently onto the damaged skin, and then finally rewrapping it up with gauze.

If I had not kissed him earlier, I would have believed that he was completely sober, and I feel uneasy as I wonder how many times he might have come to work a little tipsy.

No! He wouldn't endanger his patients like that! Well, okay, he has in the past, but that was only when he was going through a very difficult situation! Hey...

"You have been really worried about me, haven't you?" I almost wish I could take the words back as soon as they leave my mouth; I'm not sure if this is a safe topic to be bringing up with my mentor.

He pauses before he moves to cut away the bandage on my left arm.

"Drop it, Newbie." He voice is firm, but he doesn't look up.

"What? I can give you a blowjob, but you can't even admit that you are just a tiny bit concerned for me?" I give a short, jeering laugh for effect.

"Goddamn it!"

He throws the scissors at the cart and rips his gloves off furiously, tossing them to floor.

I shrink back away from him when he reaches for me. As I start to crawl backwards on the bed, my progress is halted by his hands clamping onto the sides of my jaw and his fingers enfolding around the nape of my neck.

I flinch as he drags me closer to him; his hold is nowhere near delicate, but it is not as rough as I know he could easily make it.

"Why does every fucking thing have to be explained out loud to you like you're a Goddamn four-year-old?"

His tone is irate, and he glares at me with so much fury that I am only able to open and close my mouth a few times; not producing a sound.

"Do actions even register at all in that thickskulled, girly, idiotic, and yes, dim-witted head of yours, Newbie? Do they? Because I would really like to know if I am wasting my fucking time here!"

His fingers clench excruciatingly tight into my neck and I whimper pitifully.

"Oh for Christ's sake."

He closes the rest of the distance to me and presses an almost chaste kiss to my lips.

"Pear-bear, you had better have a damn good excuse for this."

Dr. Cox immediately releases me and whirls away from the bed.

I feel as though a freezing bucket of water has been dumped over my body at the sound of that voice, and I numbly glance over to the doorway.

Jordan is standing there with her arms crossed under her breasts, and there is a controlled, vaguely amused expression on her face that I know from experience is a very, very bad sign.

Damn it! I had a real piece of blackmail to use against Dr. Cox, and now it's gone, just like that...

End Chapter.

E/N: Yep, a chapter where a lot is said, but nothing is actually resolved... And I'm aware that I continuously make everything go wrong that possibly can, but, believe me, if I tried to write something non-dramatic and normal, it would be a very boring read.

I couldn't resist using a direct line from Tonic's "Mean to Me"... I didn't just throw it in there, though, it fit, damn it!

Not as long as the last one, so I guess the length has stabilized, but at least my notes are shorter, right?

Also, I managed to accomplish a goal of mine: Complete a chapter with no time breaks. And if you don't count the daydream, I did! I have never been very good at setting normal goals...

Ack, I'm not prepared at all to write Jordan in more depth, but now I have to. I take back the comment from my first chap. Cox is not the character I have the hardest time writing; that honor definitely goes to Jordan and Elliot.

Random Thought: The content of this fic is probably kind of strange to read because of the point of view that it's in. 'shrug' Does that bother me? No, it's just something that I finally became aware of. 'glare' I know I'm slow; I don't need your input!

Recurring Thought: I have tripled the already hefty amount that I smoke since I started to write again... That's not a good sign, is it?