Warning - contains man love XD

Slight spoiler if you haven't got up to episode 25 of the anime.

Hey guys, me again. There is much more of a plot here than my last, so if your just into SMUT for no reason, you shall have to read anyways lol xD...I absolutely feel your pain.

The reason – The reason I have decided to make this the sequel to Watching you watching me, is because it refers to the competition between Mello and Near, through the feelings they have for each other and how they use each other to find each other...enjoy.

The story switches from Mello telling the story to Near to Mello telling the story to us. Its not too confusing so don't worry too much. e.g 'I hate you' - 'I hate him'

Watching You Betray Me - Mello Prov

Anime: Death Note

Pairing:Near/Mello

Genre: Hurt/Comfort/Romance/

Rated: M for language and reads of a sexual nature :P

Disclaimer:I obviously DO NOT own Death Note...I actually don't know why XD

Mello feels as though Near is avoiding him, what with all the rejections etc. Can this relationship really last much longer...what is he up to. He is definitely hiding something.

Sequel to, watching you watching me.

†

Its Hurts...

I love the feeling of him being inside of me, a feeling like no other. When we're so close to each other, so complete...its impossible to become any closer. But what am I forced to believe when he's forgotten me so suddenly. Is he bored of me now, have we done everything we can with each other and now he's moving on. Moving on to becoming better then me?

Who are you to tell me about fair, you never gave me a chance to fight back. Never gave me a chance to hurt you the same way you hurt me. I never thought I would be so vulnerable to your words, to your actions. And to be honest I absolutely hate myself for allowing myself to be this way, for allowing myself to be seen this way.

We've been living together for a little over a month now, and already, cracks are beginning to show in this 'flawless' relationship.

Its been going like this for a while now, Near comes home late. He barely acknowledges me...no matter what I do. If I were lying sprawled out naked on the bed for him, he would probably just ask me to move over. I'm feeling...rejected, I'm feeling...lonely. I'm feeling a lot of things, and none of them are good. I'm going to do something about it.

I sit up as I hear the tumbler of the lock. He's home.

I wait patiently as he walks in casually, with that usual expression on his face. The expression that shows he isn't thrilled to be home. Shouldn't he be happy coming home to me? Shouldn't he?

This is becoming painful.

He strolls into the kitchen, not saying a word to me, shocking considering you have to go through the living room to get to the kitchen.

He doesn't even glance.

Its painful, Near...your hurting me.

He comes into the living room with a glass of clear liquid, I assume its just water...Near doesn't drink the alcohol in the apartment. That's my job. Probably can't hold his drink very well either.

He sits down in his usual place. The place where he only spends six minutes before getting up and going to bed. Still not a word said, and its beginning to irritate me.

I decide that my best bet is to, strike up a conversation. Even though it is something I hate doing.

"Near..." I say.

He doesn't look up, he has a book in his hands now. Letting his eyes dart around the double page, as he continues to ignore me. I know he can hear me, he twitched as I called his name. He's doing it on purpose. The bastard.

"Near..." I call again, I'm going to stay calm.

Still he doesn't look up from the pure white pages, stained with black ink, telling a story that no one cares about.

I can't take much more of this, this is painful Near. How long do you plan to ignore me so blatantly?

I rise from my seated position. You may be home at the same time every night Near, and I may become excited when I see your figure walk through that door. But everytime I forget, that when you are home...everything just seems colder.

I walk towards our bedroom, my bare feet padding on the cold wood floor. Waiting to sink into carpet. Warm, white and always there when I long for it. Like Near used to be. The room is dark, and I keep it that way. It matches my mood as of right now.

I unlace the cords on my leather pants, and slide them down my thighs, not bothering to pay attention to detail. I remove my vest and discard my clothes on the floor. I'm left in just my silk black boxer. The boxer's I'd of liked to be removed by Near tonight...But I guess that's not happening.

Allowing myself to fall forward onto my side of the bed, I let the satin quilts around me run over every part of my body, as I curl up under the covers.

Its not long before I realise, I'm not gonna get any sleep tonight.

Thirty minutes have passed, and sleep hasn't even begun to take me. Not tempted to close my eyes, nor to count sheep. I'm wide awake, I can hear every sound around me. The ticking of the clock, the sound of the dripping tap coming from the on-suite. The sound of delicate water, hitting against the marble sink. Constantly hitting that marble, but it can't penetrate it. The sounds of such things irritate everyone around, close enough to acknowledge it...but not the marble, the marble doesn't care. Damn it...I can hear myself comparing everything to Near and I.

But I can still hear everything, the ticking, the dripping, the...the sound of Near coming to bed.

I grow eager, waiting for him to enter the room.

He does. I can see him. Dark, but his form stops the light from entering the room directly, instead it finds its way around him.

He undresses to just his boxers also. I want to be the one to take them off tonight Near. But will that happen?

He climbs into bed, different from the way I do. He lifts the covers and slides his way in between the satin and silk.

I can feel his body, its really warm. So warm.

We're back to back, my cool back against his warm one. Do opposites attract? I think so.

I want you Near...But can I have you?

Will you reject me like you do every night?

I can hear myself becoming desperate, I've forgotten the feeling of being so close to you Near. That feeling when you can't get much closer. The feeling of becoming one.

I turn my body over, I'm now facing your pure white back, I can see your rib cage expand as you breathe. But...I want you to pant!

I move close to you, you can probably feel my breath on you neck. I can see strands of colourless hair, dance around. Let me touch you Near.

I'm anxious, I'm scared of the out come to being so direct.

I raise my hands and let my fingers trail up your back, following the path of your spine. Can you feel it? Of course you can, but...can you feel how horrifically desperate I've become?

Its like the first time we did it...remember?

How you teased me, but we both knew we would get something out of it. How you pinned me to my bed, and forced me to feel pleasure...and pain. But that was real, wasn't it.How you tricked me into allowing you to be Seme. Remember? Do you remember Near?

I can feel your body shiver beneath my touch. Aren't you going to stop me? Or do you think your dreaming? Would you dream of such a thing? You seem to hate me right now. If your going to stop me – stop me now!

I move close. So warm Near...will you let me?

I move close enough, so close that I just need to purse my lips, and then I can taste you. I'm at your neck, I kiss it. I suck on it and nip at it. Your breathing is getting heavier.

Remember, I want you to pant!

I look at your neck, I've left a mark. Red, fading to pink. Soon to fade more and become un-noticeable, how unfortunate. It can't stay there forever.

I move even closer. I'm against you, so close to you. I continue to work at your neck while I run my hands down your back; lower and lower still.

Why are your eyes shut so tightly. Your mouth is slightly open while you try to control your breathing. Are you enjoying it, Near?

Your breathing is getting faster. Almost panting. I can feel myself seriously turned on. Don't tell me to stop.

My hands are beneath your boxers, I can feel the crease that separates you. Will you let me in?

A little more, your almost panting.

"Mello..." you sigh.

Yes, are you going to tell me to go faster?

"What is it...Near?"

"Stop" you say.

Stop?! No, that isn't what you just said, is it?

"Stop, Mello..." you repeat, but it sinks a little deeper this time.

No, you bastard!

I do as you say, reluctantly...I stop.

I get up almost immediately after. That hurt Near, that really did.

Climbing out of the bed, I make my way to the on-suite. Watching as the droplets of water continue to tap at that marble.

I have a growing problem, and I don't have you to help me, so I guess my hand will be my lover tonight...I shut the door behind me.

I remember, you asked me. That first time, you asked me 'Am I cold' Do you remember what I said?

'if you want to keep yourself to yourself that doesn't make you cold'

But this is different, this isn't a matter of wanting to be alone Near...your being cold!

I sit down on the toilet seat, I'm practically sulking for having to do this myself. I've only got silk boxers to cover it, and already its looks as though a tent has been erected. But its not a tent that's erected here...

I grip the waste band of my boxers, sliding them down, lifting myself up as I carefully manoeuvred it over my now weeping erection.

'fuck' the toilet seat is damn cold. I'm reluctant to do it, but I will. You bastard.

I grip my hands around my penis, its now seriously swollen. I began an up and down motion. "hnn" I moan out, this feels really good, but it could have been better if you weren't such a...

"ahh" I'm trying to be quiet, I don't want you to hear, although you probably can.

The pumping is getting faster, harder, violent...

I'm hurting myself, but the pleasure is preventing me from stopping. I bite down on my lip hard, there's nothing to grab on to. I feel the beginnings of a cut on my bottom lip as I begin to taste that metallic liquid.

"hah...Ah nn" I'm panting now, Near, it was supposed to be you.

I can feel that funny feeling in my stomach, I'm getting close. I was only supposed to see your face when I felt like this, remember that's what you said. Well where are you now?

I buck my hips up, I can never control them when I'm like this. "Ahn, ah fuck!" I curse loudly as I can feel the beginnings of my orgasm washing over me. Bucking up a couple more times, in rhythm with my pumping the pearly white liquid spurts out, landing on the tiled floor.

You can barely see it, the floor is white. You picked it out.

Still gripping tightly onto my member, I wait until the last waves of my orgasm wash over me. My body is convulsing gently...

Now I feel tired, I could sleep right here, right now. If I weren't so pissed off at you that is.

I slide my boxers back on carefully.

That fucking tap is still going, and that's when I decide. I'm not going to do this for much longer Near.

I get up to leave, but before I do. I turn of that damned tap; twist it tight. It wont meaninglessly bother something that doesn't care. I will stop it, now!

†

I wake up to bright light in my eyes. 'fucking hell' Its morning. The seven o'clock sun is seeping through those thin net curtains, and its irritating me. Groaning as I do, I sit up, squinting. My eyes still half closed and me still half asleep. Your side is empty, and the covers are tightly made. Clean freak. Ack, more light but its coming from the bathroom. Near, your actually here this morning. I can hear the shower. Everything is getting on my nerves this morning. The light, the covers that you feel the need to make every single time you lift your ass off of that bed. And now the shower, the sound of water that only reminds me of last night, and everything that happened.

I move quietly from the bed, I'm planning to just leave the room. I need to be away from you. I get up, but as I walk past the bathroom. I catch a glimpse of Near in the shower, reflected in the mirror. Oh great, I can't leave now can I.

There's no way Near would be able to see me from where I am and where he is. I lean against the door frame, but not enough to push on the door. Wow this brings back memories doesn't it.

But from where I am, I can only see his face and half his torso. You've grown a bit since the last time I saw you completely. You look taller Near. I smile soundly to myself, how can I be content with just seeing you like this? That's right, I'm not!

But yet I'm entranced by the way the water hits your delicate skin. Splashing into your hair, running down the side of your face. Finding a path to make it down to the floor. That water can explore every inch of his body, so why can't I? I could have all of that if I just walked in, but I can't bring myself to...because I'm scared of his rejection.

I get up quietly, the last thing I want is him to know I was there. I walk out of the room, past the living room and into the kitchen. "I'm hungry" I mumble to myself. There's no food in the house, it was supposed to be my turn to go shopping, but...I kinda forgot. Usually when that happens Near does it instead. But he's hardly been home lately, there's no need for him to shop for the both of us. I'm left to fend for myself.

I search the cupboards frantically looking for something edible. I check the fridge. Lucky, there's sour milk, mouldy cheese and a bar of chocolate that's only been there for a few days. It doesn't take a scientist to figure out which I'm gonna go for.

I make my way back to the couch, I think Near has finished his shower. I can't hear the water anymore.

I fall backwards onto the leather, letting my legs rest on the arm of the chair. Un-wrapping the chocolate I start to eat as if it were the only thing I've eaten in days. It is.

Near walks out of the bedroom. I can see him over the chocolate bar I'm holding, but I pretend I haven't noticed him. I wonder if he's going out today.

Its Wednesday I think, I don't really keep track of the days like that alien over there. But as I thought, he grabs his coat and keys and heads for the door.

I can't just let him leave like that.

"Near!" I shout accidentally, I don't want him to just go. I'm sitting up now staring at him.

You've stopped, I've got your attention. But now that I do, I don't know what to say. Your looking at the floor though, not at me!

Your hand is still on the door handle though, your still turning it. Your still gonna leave.

You don't look up "I don't know what day I'll be home"

Pardon?! What day? Not what hour but what day now. Near...you, you...

"You bastard" I say quietly, my voice breaking. I know you heard me, the place isn't that big. But you still leave the house, slamming the door behind you.

"Bastard" I mumble, I feel like I'm going to cry. There's a pain in my throat, my mouth is getting moist. It hurts to hold it back, but I will. I wont cry for you.

I let my forehead fall into my hand. I can't believe you've done this to me, Near.

But now I know, your keeping something from me.

I can hear something vibrating, its really annoying. Where is it coming from. I look around the room, something flashing on the table. I think you left your phone Near.

I walk over to it, its flashing up a name that I don't recognise. 'Suki – Headquarters'

Who the hell is Suki from fucking headquarters, what headquarters?

I'm still fuming mad so I won't respect Near's privacy.

I press the green button.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Near? Where are you?" I don't recognise the voice, but its still jabbering on "The case isn't going to be solved in time if you don't get here soon"

"W-What?" What, what case, Near is working on a case? What you talking about Suki!

"Hello? Near? Just be quick!"

The phone line goes dead, that dull continuous tone.

A case, that's it, I have no choice but to snoop now.

I storm into the bedroom, this may be your room Near but its mine too!

I go straight for his corner unit, I open the drawer angrily nearly pulling the whole thing out. There's nothing in here but...Near stuff. A comb, a few of those toys he likes to collect, some lotion. 'bloody hell'

Where would he not want me to look, somewhere I wouldn't think twice about looking...the...the cleaning cabinet.

Moving to the on-suite, I rummage through the arrangement of different bleaches and cleaners. I'm pulling everything out now, my head is half way in the cabinet,

I can see something, something that looks like boring letters. But I pull them out regardless of why they're there or what they are.

It has a lot of writing on it, I might as well read it. I'm not getting anywhere with this searching game.

'Dear Near'

Is this what I'm looking for?

'Near, as you well know'... Blah, blah. Skip, skip 'It is of our best interest if you accept the role of becoming L and taking the rest of his cases' What the fuck! L, Near, what have you done?

I begin reading the other letters.

'Near, thank you for accepting the role of...'

So that's it Near. I've read the letters over and over again. It states it in black and white. Near...you've betrayed me.

When me and Near left the Wammy house to live together, we promised none of us would take the role of becoming L, simply because we knew it would rip our relationship apart. We both knew it would only turn into a competition all over again, and to be honest, we didn't want that at all...did we Near. But obviously you didn't care.

I cant believe what I'm seeing, but there it is as clear as day. What he's done, and what he's destroyed...

He's done it on purpose, I know he has. He's done it to rub it in my face, I'm number two, he's number one. That bastard how could he do this to me.

I feel that feeling again, the pain in your throat when your about to cry, but this time...I might of let one tear escape my ducts and roll down my cheek. Causing the ink to smudge on the letter. What do I do now.

There's a sound from behind me, I turn around swiftly. Its him, that traitor "Near" my voice is breaking again.

"M-Mello" he stutters.

I actually have your full attention now, when it matters.

We're both just standing there, your in the door way. I could just push past you and leave you where you stand. But I can't, I deserve an explanation. I open my mouth, shaky as the words sound as they leave my mouth, they still hit you hard.

"Everyone has a secret Near, but can you keep it?"

Yesh I know they wouldn't be as common as to send a letter, but I'm only human here.

I hope that didn't become to boring for you people, what with all the feelings etc. lol

Please tell me what you think, if you like it I shall start the next chapter immediately, if you don't theres no point :( Please review this, constructive criticism appreciated...but not total flames please, they hurt me lol.