AN; This chapter turned out to be a freakishly longer than what I was going for. Hope you enjoy it either way :D, I thought about splitting it up into two chapters. But where would be the fun in that...

I hope this chapter wasn't too confusing, but if there are any questions that you feel just need to be answered, feel free to PM me.

Disclaimer – I do not own Death Note or any of the characters I use, Nor do I own the song;

Fall For You by Secondhand Serenade

"Matt" I call "Don't lea–"

"I don't think its a good idea" he interrupts.

And as he leaves, I feel that painful lump in my throat again. Soft sobs escape my mouth, as I try my best to repress them so Matt can't hear. Although he probably can.

I'm lonely, I'm confused, I'm drunk and I just made a pass at my best friend. What else could go wrong right now? I shouldn't jinx it.

In the Dark

I wake up slowly, with the sun in my eyes for the second morning in a row. I don't remember falling asleep. But I imagine I cried myself to sleep. My face feels tight and swollen, especially my eyes and...my lips...

My memory of last night is coming back in bits and pieces, I remember...Matt, and a bar, and a Matt look-a-like. Home, couch and...shit.

I sit up instantly, regretting it a second later, when a chasing headache catches me painfully. "Fuck" I swear under my breath. My mouth tastes like something crawled in it and died. Mixed with an ashtray, a dirty ashtray. My throat is sore and my head is throbbing. I can barely open my eyes against the light pouring through Matt's curtain-less windows. And thoughts of last night keep circling my mind...how embarrassing. Really, what was I thinking. I was thinking I was lonely...probably.

Still, I must have been somebody else last night. The real me.

After the throbbing in my head stops long enough for me to look around, I do just that. The place is actually kind of...clean, for Matt. If you excuse the beer cans scattered in various places all over the apartment. There all empty as well.

But some how Matt's happy, I mean, he seems like he's happy. He's always got a smile on his face, he's hardly ever upset, and yet all he needs for that happiness is. Himself? No, there must be more to it.

I hear a door open. Speak of the devil. And Matt strolls out of the bedroom with that look on his face. The hangover look. I can't help but allow a smirk to take over my lips, that face he makes always makes me laugh.

He's just in his boxers, I'm surprised he didn't freeze to death with all the windows open last night. Then again, I guess I'm lucky to be alive, it was colder in this room.

I need to apologise to him, clear things up. I don't think of Matt in that way, I'm sure he knows that too. But either way, I need to say I'm sorry.

Almost as if he read my thoughts;

"Don't worry about it, do you want breakfast?"

Fine with me, if he doesn't want an apology, I'm fine with not giving one.

"Erm..." is the most intelligent response I can think of.

He just smiles and drags his feet into the kitchen. I can't imagine Matt cooking, or making breakfast in general. I guess he can be pretty handy.

I suddenly hear the sound of saucepans falling and glass breaking just as the thought crosses my mind. That doesn't restore much confidence.

Then Matt pops his head around the door frame.

"There's a café down the road"

I laugh out loud at that point. I knew there was a reason I missed being around him. We look at each other briefly and both burst out laughing. It wasn't that funny, but it was...you had to of been there.

As the laughter begins to die down, it stops abruptly when there's a knock on the door. A soft knock, a knock that says 'nothing too important, but I need to see you' so to speak.

I look to the door, then look to Matt, then to the door again. For some reason, I can't bring myself to move, I just stare at the door for one reason or another. Weird.

Matt doesn't seem that bothered, he just casually walks over to the door. Who could be knocking at this time? Does this happen often?

He places his hands on both the lock and the handle, and twists and pulls at the same time. The latch is on so the door only opens a few inches. I can't see who it is, the door opens at an angle away from me. All I can see is Matt, slightly facing sideways.

Matt seems surprised by who ever is at the door.

"N-Near?" he stutters "What are you doing here?"

Near?! What! Why the hell would Near be here, at Matt's place, where Matt lives?

I just sit there staring blankly at what I can see of the door and Matt's face. My mouth agape.

I can't hear what Near's saying though, but my curiosity is getting the better of me.

Without making a sound, I rise off the couch, doing my best not to move too much. Any unnecessary sound would be...well...unnecessary.

I walk cautiously over to the door, trying my best to avoid the creaky floorboards.

I'm up against the wall, the door next to me but the opening facing Matt. We have a good view of each other now, I can see his full expression...still shocked.

I can hear Near's voice

"...I can't fine him" I'm guessing he's talking about me "Do you know where he is?"

With that Matt looks at me through the corner of his eye.

"Erm..." he starts, but I shoot him a death glare. If Near knew I were here, he'd demand to be let in. He'd want to see me, he'd want to...talk.

Matt registers pretty quickly to what my glares mean.

"N-No, he's not here" Idiot! He asked if you knew where I am, not if I'm here.

"I see" he says quietly. I can't help but feel satisfied by this. After all I've been through in less than twenty-four hours. Actually, if you count how long Near's been acting like a prick, it adds up to weeks. I smile inwardly to myself.

"Matt, if you know where he is...please tell me" wow Near, that was unexpected, then again, Matt sucks at lying.

Matt shakes his head quickly and slightly dramatically "I don't know where he is, Near"

"Fine" he answers simply. "Sorry for the intrusion"

Matt closes the door a few seconds after the last word's were spoken, and just looks at me.

"He's worr–"

"I don't care" I interrupt. Well, I don't. Not really. Maybe. Not enough to do anything about it anyway...not right now.

"So how long are you planning on staying here?"

"Huh?" the question caught me slightly off guard. Staying? I guess I never really thought of staying. But, where else have I got to go to be honest. I don't really have much of a choice but to stay, do I?

What am I so worried about, this will be great. Me and Matt. Matt and I. Living together, having a laugh. Getting drunk every night going to exhaust, or smoke...or whatever that club was called. No cares, no commitment...no Near.

Just picking up guys...and girls, getting laid whenever we feel like it. Not getting rejected every time you feel like being with a white fluff ball. Not being told to 'get off' when you want to be close. Not...not...

"Mello, are you okay" comes Matt's voice.

Then I realise, I'm just standing there, leaning against the wall. My face probably looks as though I'm about to cry. Because I am.

"Mello?" he asks again, looking a little more concerned.

"I don't want to be with just anyone" my voice is breaking.

What the hell is wrong with me, why am I acting like such a...a...I don't even know. Why am I so emotional, why do I feel like I'm going to cry every other minute. Why do I –

Next thing I know, Matt's so close to me I can feel his body heat. He's, hugging me? He's hugging me, tightly. Trying to comfort me, trying to make me feel better.

Tears are pricking in the corners of my eyes, threatening to over flow.

"W-Why am I always crying, Matt?" my breathing is coming out in pants. "Why am I...never happy for long?"

I can feel his arms get tighter around me, really tight. Reassuringly tight.

So, I guess I'll be staying with Matty for a while.

†

"When are you going to get your stuff then?"

"It's a bit too soon isn't it?"

"Its been three days hasn't it?"

"Well, what if he's waiting?"

"If you haven't come back in the first forty-eight hours, people normally give up"

"Near isn't normal"

"Either way, the 'L' job is pretty time consuming. I doubt he's got time to work, and wait for you at the apartment"

"...I guess"

"Uh-huh, so go get your stuff soon, its already almost midnight. He'll be working right?"

"Yeah..."

"Great...I'll wait here for you. Go, go, go Cinderella, before you turn into a pumpkin"

"Matt!"

"...ouch!"

I leave Matt's apartment, after hitting him that is. He's so careless, sometimes I find myself just watching him and...feeling jealous.

Its pretty cold out tonight, like seriously cold. I can see the condensation of my breath against the night air in front of my face. The city is pretty busy at this time. There's cars speeding back and forth, lights on every building in sight and...girls standing on street corners.

It doesn't take me long to bus it to where I used to live. This part of town is much a contradiction to where Matt lives. Its quiet, quiet enough to think. I look up to the top floor of the apartment complex, there aren't any lights on. I think I'll be alright.

After exiting the elevator, I make a beeline to the apartment door. Its always quiet on this floor, its creepy.

After twisting my key and unlocking the tumblers as soundly as I can, the door pushes open with a squeak making me feel even more on edge.

What's the matter with me, why am I feeling so nervous. So what if Near is here, which he most likely isn't. Its not like his feeble body could stop me from leaving. Not like those small arms could hold me down. Not like those lifeless eyes could tell me to stay...not like – I do think too much.

Entering the pitch black apartment did prove to be difficult. I couldn't remember where I left all my stuff. Plus doing it in the dark was even more difficult.

I grab an old travel bag from inside the closet, and seize as much of my belongings as I can. I'm feeling a little anxious, probably the reason I'm trying to get in and out as quick as I can.

Underwear; Truck loads

Clothes; Duh

Leather; of course...

"I'm all set" I whisper to myself.

I exit the master bedroom, and put my hand on the door ready to turn when...

"Mello?"

Shit.

"Mello, where have you been?"

I turn around to see Near on the couch in the open plan living room. He looks as though he's just woken up, but that doesn't matter. I look away and twist the door handle, only to be stopped my a pale hand on top of mine. He got up so quick.

"Mello, what are you doing?"

He's been asking all the questions tonight, its pissing me off.

"I'm leaving, what does it look like?" I say bluntly. And for some reason, he actually looks slightly surprised, only noticeable by the slight widening of his eyes.

"Why?" he states simply.

Why? WHY?! Why do you think Near. Are you stupid, are you insane for forgetting what you did. Are you –

My thoughts are cut off when a pair of soft lips are on my own. There warm, and I could really close my eyes right now and forget my anger towards him. But that's not my style, is it.

I push Near off me violently, he hits his head against the wall with quite a 'thump' and I almost cringe at imagining the pain. But he's still standing, so it can't of hurt that much.

"Mello, you can't leave, you ca – "

"Who are you to tell me what I can and can't do" I interrupt. I can feel my anger pulsing through me. He's so blunt, yet he doesn't tell you anything. He's so intelligent, yet he doesn't do anything smart. He's so emotionless. Yet he can make you suffer the wrath of your emotions all at once...so painfully.

"I'm leaving because of what you've done!" I advance towards him slightly "I'm leaving because you've made me feel like the most irrelevant person in your life!" my voice is getting louder and louder with every syllable "I'm leaving because you've made me hurt so bad! I hate you, I hate you so much! Near...you bastard!"

I'm seething with annoyance, anger and anxiety. My breathing is heavy. My face is hot. My patience is wearing thin.

"Mello?"

He's pissing me off. How dare he be so calm right now.

"Have you been eating well?"

"What?" what is he talking about?

"I hope you haven't just been eating chocolate..." he smiles. A really small smile though. Like a fake smile.

"I-I" I'm caught slightly off guard here. What is he getting at.

"You've been cooking right, Not just take out? I assume living at Matt's for a few days, you wouldn't of bothered with eating properly"

What is he trying to do, is he trying to change the subject, or even...lighten the mood? He's really trying though, I can see it in his face. He was worried. But unfortunately, that doesn't change the facts of what has happened, and it was all down to him.

"And what about–"

"Shut up Near! Just shut up. Don't use your twisted mind games on me. I won't fall for it. Not this time, not after what you've done!"

He continues just standing there, looking at his sock covered toes.

"Your hidden agenda is obvious Near! How your trying to get above me, how your trying to surpass L!" I'm angry again, it didn't go away for long "I trusted you Near! I didn't pursue my ambition of becoming number one because...b-because" oh no, my voice is breaking, I'm going to cry. But I can't.

"Mello?"

"Because I wanted to be with you, if I worked with you, I'd be able to stay with...Near" Near...you've truly broken me. I'm angry at myself for relying on you so much, I can't stay with you anymore. I know I'll barely be able to live without you, because of this. Its going to be hard, really hard. But it hurts too much now.

I hear tapping on the floorboards as my tears fall onto them.

"Mello I'm sorry. I'm sorry for–"

"I'm not listening to you...not anymore Near, I'm not"

"Mello"

"No!" I cover my ears with my hands childishly, shaking my head, tears still running down my face.

"Mello!"

"I said no! No! No! I'm not listening I'm not–"

"I'LL QUIT!"

What? What did he say? I've never heard Near scream so loud before. I've never heard Near scream at all, or quit at anything. What is he thinking, what is he –

I look up at him, totally surprised, my eyes wide. He's standing there still, his head bowed low and a-a tear?! Falls to the floorboards?! What have I done to you Near?

"Don't be so selfish, Near"

He looks up at me, surprised. I kinda surprised myself with that one too.

"People need L and without him, who would be the one to free the world from psychos like Kira?"

He opens his mouth to speak, but I just turn and walk to the door again.

"Mello, wait"

I'm not going to wait Near, there's no reason for me to.

My hand is stopped as I try and make it to the door. Near's hand is holding onto my wrist. Tightly.

"What are you–!" I start.

"Your not listening"

"I don't need to!" I pull my arm away from Near, releasing his grip.

"Yes you do!" he tries to grab my wrist again as I advance to the door. But I push him against the wall instead, pinning him by his shoulders. Dropping my bag in the process.

Looking at me blankly he doesn't seem surprised, or scared or...anything. But...he looks, angry? No way, Near, angry, I don't think so.

"Your just being selfish!" I yell at him.

With a swift movement, Near pushes me hard moving towards me, forcing me to fall onto the floor on my back.

"Why can't I win with you, I said I'd quit but you won't stop!" Near's raising his voice, and I can't help but let a smirk show on my lips. This is exciting, to see what Near is really feeling. But at the same time, I'm scared. I've never seen Near this way before.

"You can't quit now, you've taken it" I say, just looking up at him. I'm going to drive you crazy Near, I'm going to make you regret this...I will.

"Then what am I supposed to do?!" he's frustrated, his face is becoming flushed.

"Nothing" my voice is calm "Be L, forget me, I don't care, just let go"

Before he has a chance to, I roll so he is underneath me. I look at him briefly, making a mental note of how my ex-lover looked.

I get off of him, and for the third time, try and make it to the door.

"Mello stop!"

He grabs me from behind, wrapping his arms around my stomach, stopping me from moving. He's really strong for his appearance. I forgot.

He pushes me against the wall, hard. My head hits it full on, resembling the 'thump' from earlier.

I'm up against the wall now, my chest is pressed hard against it, and Near puts me in an arm lock, pulling painfully.

"P-Piss off" I manage to say "Let me g–"

"I'm doing this for you!"

I whimper slightly, it hurts to move, and every time Near speaks, the movement makes the pain worse.

"How are you?"

"I'm doing this to protect you"

Again, how are you Near?

"You left the Mafia in a mess, I received information about everything"

"What are you talking about?"

"You have so many enemies, people know you now, people want revenge. Its unbelievable the amount of people that want you dead. Its organised and its dangerous Mello!"

I hear Near's words, and they effect me. Its obvious people would want me dead. I've done a lot of things, to a lot of people. But right now, all I'm concentrating on, is Near's breath against my ear. Its tickling. He's the same height as me now. I can't really push him around anymore.

"I did this so I could do something about it"

"I don't need your help"

"Obviously you do, because without me becoming L, you would be dead right now"

It hits me hard, really hard. Near's been protecting...me? That's what he's been doing, that's what's with all the late nights and stress and – what have you done Near? What have I done?

I slide down against the wall, kneeling now, Near moving down with me. He's still holding me close to it. I can feel that lump in my throat. The one that tells me, all my pride is about to disappear. Near...fine, you were protecting me but why, why –

"Why did you forget me?" my voice is broken, the tears pricking at the corners of my eyes have fallen. My forehead is the only part of my body against the wall now.

"...I didn't, I just couldn't look at you...I felt so guilty"

"You...rejected me..." my sobs are forcing me to take breaths between my words.

"I'm sorry, Mello"

"I hate you right now, Near"

"I know"

I feel his breath move across my neck, down to my shoulder blade.

"I'm sorry Mello..." his mouth clamps onto my shoulder blade, sucking gently at the skin there. Making me shudder.

"I'm really sorry Mello" his muffled voice. His hand that was holding my stomach moves up my chest and grasps my chin, forcing me to face sideways. Near meets me halfway, and captures my lips with a heated kiss.

My eyes widen before they become half-lidded, and eventually close.

I had almost forgotten what is was like to be so close to you Near. I'll forgive you, just this once.

"Mmph!" he runs his fingers over my crotch, causing me moan, only to be muffled by his lips. Matt's shorts aren't as thick as leather. I can feel every one of Near's movements because of it.

The kiss breaks briefly, while we both gasp for air.

I feel like I'm on fire, I feel like I've needed this for so long...Near, where have you been?

I want more. I lean in and push my lips against Near's roughly, closing the distance between us. He says something, but his voice is muffled.

He bites my bottom lip hard, causing me to unexpectedly open my mouth.

His tongue enters my mouth, massaging mine with his. I moan into his mouth as I try to do the same, but he holds my tongue down with his own.

He pulls away slightly, and nips and sucks on my bottom lip. It tickles a little. Feels good though.

I feel his hand move away from my crotch, I whimper slightly in protest. I was becoming hard. Instead, his hands move up to the collar of my shirt I'm wearing. I feel the buttons pop open as he pulls on it roughly, buttons hitting the wall as he does.

He pulls the shirt off hastily, revealing my bare torso, and gently runs his fingers up my stomach, up to my chest as clasps onto my nipple.

I groan out at the sensation.

My arm is against the wall, my hand flat against it trying to claw as he continues to roll the soft pink numbs between his middle and index fingers.

My other hand is supporting me on the floor, stopping me from falling sideways.

Finally, his mouth moves from my own and instead, secures on my neck. He kisses it gently, sucking even more gently. It's causing me to moan, and pant and want more.

Not a word has been said between us, the only noises filling the room is the sound of me moaning, and Near's heavy breathing.

I hear the sound of metal clanging together, when I feel the air around me.

Near's unbuckled my belt.

He slips his hands below the waistband of both the shorts and boxers. I immediately react, thrusting my body upwards as the feeling of his hand grips around my erection hard.

"Ahh, Near!" is all I can manage to say.

His hand just rubs against me, softly. Teasing me painfully. I move my body up and down slightly, trying to make the feeling even more intense. But when I do, he just stops all together...on purpose. Forcing me to stay still while he does whatever he wants to me.

My breathing is really heavy now, and every now and again, a small groan escapes my throat.

"N-Near, wa–"

Before I know it, Near goes round to the back of my shorts, running his fingers over my entrance. I whimper from both the shock and the pleasure. He pulls the shorts down low enough and without much warning, he pushes a finger into me.

"Ah! Fuck!" I swear in a loud whisper. His fingers were dry, but the more he repeats the movement, the slicker they get, moving in and out of me with ease.

He goes to add another finger, and the minute he does, my body jolts up.

"Am I hurting you, Mello?"

"N-No...I'm fine?" I lie. It does hurt, I haven't been touched there for a while. Its a feeling that I'm waiting to get used to.

After moving in and out of me at a steady pace, I begin to get used to the feeling and start moving my hips in rhythm with Near's fingers. But I don't want his fingers anymore.

"Nea–" I stop, as I feel him pull out of me quickly.

I feel a prodding at my entrance, and before I have a chance to respond, I'm forced to bite my lip as a burning sensation fills me and heat enters me.

He grabs onto my hand against the wall instantly, and entwines our fingers.

Impaled by Near, I feel slightly crippled. I don't move, or make a sound. He pushes in further and a low grunt escapes my throat. When he's all the way in, he starts a really slow steady rhythm. I suck air between my teeth while I get used to the feeling.

He's going faster now, its not hurting anymore. It feels really good. I buck my hips in rhythm with Near's thrusts and start moaning in rhythm as well.

"Ah, Mello your so tight"

"Shut up N-Near, its your fault...you forgot–"

Nears pulls out almost all the way, and thrusts up mercilessly.

A long low groan leaves my mouth as I almost see stars. That felt amazing.

"I didn't forget you..."

He repeats the action and I moan out again. He keeps hitting that spot, that spot that drives me crazy.

I can feel myself getting close, if he hits me there one more –

"Hahh!" Our movements are insane now. I'm now bouncing on Near. I'm gonna come...soon.

"Near...Near I'm gonna–!"

He thrusts into me one last time, hitting that spot dead on. I scream his name loudly before exploding on the wall in front of me. Not long after I feel hot liquid enter me. We ride out our orgasms completely before I rest my head against the wall and fall sideways onto the floor, with Near following.

Were both breathing really heavy, and its becoming totally silent. I can feel him playing with strands of my hair, smoothing them down making a strange tingling sensation cover my head. All that's in front of me is the wall, and I don't really feel like turning around to face him.

Near wraps his arms around me and pulls himself close to me from behind. He kisses my neck before saying.

"I'm sorry" I wonder how many times I can get him to say that.

"You said that already" Its getting annoying.

"Does that mean you forgive me...for not telling you?"

"I guess I have no choice" Even though, I'm really the one thats sorry.

"I'm going to quit...After, everything is done"

I move further away from Near, so his arms can't reach around me.

"Don't be selfish..." I told you before.

There's silence for a few seconds.

"If selfish means that I want to keep Mello close to me, and not have him as an enemy. I guess I really am selfish"

Near how can you keep a straight face when you say such embarrassing things. Sure I said something similar, but...you expect the unexpected. Still, it means something that he actually cares enough to quit. Even if he has finished the investigation, he still isn't one to quit.

I like the fact that I'm the reason why...

"Who will be L then?" I am curious.

Quite a gap of silence passes before it is broken.

"Matt?"

"Matt?! Ha! Matt?!...don't tease" I silently laugh to myself, with the biggest smile on my face. Matt, that's funny.

"I'm serious"

"What?" Matt? I guess he's smart. I mean he's only third, so he would be. Looking at me and Near, he'd have to be smart to beat everyone else behind us.

"I guess he is smart...to a certain extent"

"I'll ask him tomorrow"

That was strange.

Matt, Matt as L. He'd certainly investigate uniquely. This would be interesting.

Where both still sitting there, naked on the floor. Breathing in each other, being close to one another.

I can't say I know how things will go from here, because I don't. Who knows how our relationship will continue, although I'll try if he's willing to...I guess. If I think about it, I do come to a conclusion;

I think I love you Near, maybe. No, probably definitely. I might be able to actually say the words one day...

I even said I'd go back to Near if Matt becomes L...weird huh...?

...

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting
Could it be that we have been this way before?
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core

But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a guy like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

This is not what I intended
I always swore to you I'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may have failed, but I have loved you from the start

Oh, but hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a guy like you is impossible to find
It's impossible

So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in, I'm yours to keep
And hold on to your words 'cause talk is cheap
And remember me tonight when you're asleep

Because tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a guy like you is impossible to find

Tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a guy like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

Fall For You by Secondhand Serenade

AN; Yes...I've totally altered it how I like, I ended it that way cos I think it works for everyone (Matt, Near and Mello) so don't flame me for my dramatic change in story line :D...Please.

This was the third and final chapter of the series, and there will be no more. So...please review, tell me what you thought, was it good? Could it be better? Thank You!

Babbling - I actually found this chapter difficult to write cos...so much is going on, and I'd like you guys to be able to 'visualise' what's going on, so I tried to put in as much detail, without putting in too much detail, if you know what I mean?

I had to put that song at the end because, while I was writing the whole Mello and Near, finally calming down, I thought of that song...even had it playing while I was writing lol I felt it fit in with the last scene pretty well. But that's just me.

Obviously I changed;

Because a girl like you is impossible to find to Because a guy like you is impossible to find

Hehe XD

BuhBye xx