Disclaimer: I have never, still do not, and will never own Gakuen Alice.

The giant chick wearing a glimmering size XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXL wedding dress with Frisbee-sized sequins stood at the back of the church. His arms were linked with the person who was famous for his Alice of Human Pheromones, the notorious Narumi-sensei.

The groom gasped at the sight of his still-for-some-reason-teacher, and his gasp became even louder when he glanced at the audience and saw his best friend, supposed first crush, and personal blackmailer, although he almost had a heart attack when he saw literally everyone he knew in the chapel.

Ruka shrieked at the priest, "My wedding with Piyo-chan was supposed to be a secret! Why are there so many people?!"

The priest shrugged in reply, "How should I know? This is your wedding."

He almost got his face distorted by a headbutt, but Ruka wanted the wedding to go smoothly for his beloved Piyo's sake.

As Piyo moved towards the front of the chapel where Ruka was standing, the soon-to-be-husband jumped up and lovingly hugged and twirled around with his soon-to-be-'bride', "Oh my dear Piyo-chan!"

Coughing the priest, took out a book to show that he was going to begin the wedding ceremony. Ruka and Piyo got in place, while Narumi was blowing his nose and wiping his tears and whispering, "Oh Ruka... You're getting married. It was a good thing I overheard you, so I could get everyone to come..."

The flower girl was one of Piyo's baby cousin, half the size of himself. A little girl chick named Yaya. The ring boy was one of Ruka's nephews. He was Ryuu and loved Ruka very much.

As the priest-dude continued with the ever so boring speech, Ruka and Piyo kept staring at each other with sparkling eyes.

"Do you, Nogi Ruka, vow to take NLN Piyo as your wife?"

"I do."

"Do you, NLN Piyo, vow to take Nogi Ruka as your husband?"

"-Tweet-"

After a bit more of the boring speech...

"You may now kiss the bride."

The couple had been waiting for that sentence. Piyo, being fully capable of understanding the human language, bent over to kiss his lover.

RIP

The Frisbee-sized sequins started to fly off in every which direction they could. A huge rip was going down Piyo's wedding dress that Ruka had specifically ordered just for that day. Screams reverberated through the chapel as the a fraction of the audience got injured by the flying projectiles ricocheting off the walls.

"NO! MY BELOVED HAIR!"

"OMIGOSH! MY FAVORITE SHIRT!"

"THE BEAUTY OF MY FACE HATH BEEN RUINED! ACK!"

"MY ARM! IT CUT OFF A CHUNK OF MY ARM!"

Another fraction of the audience was distracted by the noise and ran to help and assist all those who were victims of the evil sequins. Only three members stared intently at the lovely scene as Piyo and Ruka were passionately hugging and kissing amidst the ruckus. Another member felt aghast and was gaping at the thought that an animal and a human just kissed.

SNAP SNAP SNAP

Flashes were shot at the couple. Hotaru's trusty camera was waiting for action, and the money signs were burning from greed in her eyes. The pain she felt when the money wasn't coming in...

Natsume, on the other hand and for some reason, just could not accept the fact that his best friend's first kiss was with an animal.

'Ruka! You could have kissed a random girl and then done this with the chicken. This will give you bad memories in the future! I mean I accept Piyo as your 'bride' or husband, but it's just that he shouldn't be your first kiss!'

But of course, the flame caster dare not say anything for fear of hurting his best friend's feelings.

After their 'love' scene ended, the newly-wedded pair turned around to thank the priest, only to find out that the sequins had successfully stuck itself into his stomach, causing him to fall unconscious. As the people were sent to the hospital, or going with the injured to the hospital, all that remained were Mikan, Narumi, Ruka's parents, Hotaru, Natsume, Sumire, Tsubasa, and Misaki.

They continued with comments, compliments, praises, and all that other good stuff...

"Ne ne... I wonder what kind of kids you will have... Oh! I'm so excited to know! Send me pictures when you have them okay?" Mikan giggled with joy and happiness.

"Oh Ruka-kun! I feel as if you're my son-in-law... Don't you feel so happy that I spread the word about your wedding? You're famous now! You can show off Piyo-kun to the everyone!" Narumi oh-so-fakely wiped away his tears of joyness with a pink silk handkerchief that came out of nowhere.

Right when Narumi said that, the doors to the chapel swung open revealing a beautiful blond woman wearing expensive furs and a plain man by her side, "Don't you dare call my Ruka your son-in-law! He's MY son-in-law! You arrogant dumbo!"

The man by her side screamed at his son, "RUKA! How could you?! Marrying an animal. It defies all the laws of Physics!"

Flashing numerous pictures from the incident when Piyo's eventful dress ripped, Hotaru smirked maliciously, "These will sell for quite a lot... But because today was your wedding, I will give you some advice. Don't put Piyo in a dress EVER again. Your taste in fashion is horrible, and it'll make me lose money because the pictures don't look good enough."

Natsume placed his hand on Ruka's shoulder while smiling a tiny bit, "I hope you're happy... If you're not, we can eat fried chicken. There will be lots of meat."

"Why?! I know I'm much prettier than a giant chicken. I KNOW it," Sumire bit a handkerchief and started to pull, "Ugh! It's just not possible that I lost to a chicken!"

Tsubasa looked at Ruka and started to dramatically weep into his own arm, "It's so surprising... Ruka-chan... You were all blushy with Mikan-chan before, and now here you are married before your sempais."

Misaki patted Ruka on the head even though he was unfortunately taller than her now, "Good luck, I wonder what giant chicks eat, but you used to play with Piyo-chan a lot, so I'm sure you know."

Quickly, Narumi became a painful lump after being whipped by Ruka's mommy and kicked by Ruka himself as well. Ruka's daddy was pissed off that his son-in-law was a giant chicken, though soon it caused him to become emotional.

"Why...? I thought she gave birth to a healthy and normal son... Oh yes... It's because of that Alice... Animal Pheromones wasn't it?"

After dividing all the cake and refreshments, everyone excluding Ruka's father started telling the two to dance!

And dance they did. As Piyo grabbed Ruka and started twirling around, the ripped edge of the dress had a sharp piece of sequin still stuck on it. Eck... It cut through the walls of the chapel and the whole entire building collapsed.

Such a tragic day...

Author's Notes:

Lol this was written out of my own interest... I'm sorry if you don't like it because it's kinda Shounen Ai-ish... And it's an animal x human... I'm sorry if this offended your religion... -Sniff-

Also, seriously, I have no idea what happens in a wedding, so if I got the words wrong... You can tell me... I'll keep note of it. XD NLN stands for No Last Name by the way :P Because Piyo really doesn't have a last name right?

Thank you omgwho.amiagain for being such an awesome person that read this and laughed at it. It made me feel very happy. :) And also for sharing your grapes and crackers with me :) Hohoho... She is someone that must not be harmed... Cuz she's my huggy-toy :)

Feel free to send threats to me for being an idiot and writing this... -Ties self up to get killed-

Thanks for reading :)

chris3169512