Disclaimer: I do not own any recognisable characters - Just playing with JK Rowlings toys.

The Great Hall was teeming with students, teachers and guests. The feast was over and the tables cleared away leaving the dance floor empty.

Everyone was dressed in their finery, in particular Chief Medi-Wizard Arkwright, who was standing at the podium, a hammer in his hand. His robe was shining gold and blue and had tiny sequins sewn in intricate designs along the hems. He surveyed the scene and his eyes glinted brightly, his face split into a wide smile.

As caring and as qualified as he was in his position, Bentley Arkwright was essentially a businessman and a moneymaker. He loved the annual charity ball for St Mungo's, it always raked in a lot of galleons for the hospital. Money also went to the Aging Wizards Benevolent Fund, of which he was Chief Treasurer. He smiled smugly and started to plan how to spend his own personal cut, him being an aging wizard and meeting the criteria for a regular allowance and all.

'Bentley, we need to round up the prizes,' Minerva peered at him over her spectacles, her lips pinched slightly as she observed him. This man didn't deny himself anything, she noted. His silver hair was swept back and hung loose over his collar. He was wearing very expensive cologne and on his fingers were two large gold rings, encrusted with rare gems. His wand was rare ebony, containing dragon heartstring that he had purchased from Alfonso Weevil's Rare Wand Emporium, the most expensive wand shop in the world. He liked to tell people that on a regular basis.

Bentley turned to Minerva, his smile not reaching his eyes. 'Naturally, Headmistress. And may I take this opportunity to thank your good self and the Professors for giving of their time so generously. The money will go to very worthy causes.' He flashed his perfect white teeth at her.

One of the worthy causes, Minerva thought bitterly, and regretted agreeing to this ridiculous auction for the umpteenth time.

Bentley considered Minerva for a short moment. She had always been bitter, even at school, he remembered. Never any fun and always stuck to the rules. He had enjoyed school and still did OK. He puffed out his chest, raising his gavel high in his hand and hammering it hard onto the podium.

The gathered crowd stood and faced the podium expectantly.

'Ladies, Gentlemen, Students and Invited guests,' Bentley's voice was like sickly sweet syrup as he spoke, enunciating each syllable roundly 'we will shortly be starting our auction, if you could gather around. And auction prizes, we need you on the stage, if you please. I thank you.' He beamed around at the smiling faces.

There was movement in the crowd as one by one the Professors of Hogwarts walked towards the stage.

Hermione turned to Ron and sighed deeply. 'Better go up.' She shrugged.

Ron grinned at her. 'Don't worry, I'll bid for you then I can find some excellent jobs for you. Starting in the bedroom.'

Hermione laughed a little and wandered up to the stage, taking her position between Professors Flitwick and McGonagall. Only Professor Flitwick was smiling. The other Professors were stony faced as they gazed at the crowd.

Hermione scanned the crowd and saw Lavender Brown staring up at her, her face set. Hermione looked pointedly at her and she nodded. There wasn't much love lost between them, but she had her uses, did Lavender. Hermione fought back a small smile; she knew she had her over a barrel. She scanned the row of Professors slightly. Her breath hitched in her throat a little and she turned her gaze forwards again.

Bentley spoke again.

'Here are the rules. Anyone can bid on one of our wonderful volunteers. The Professor you win has to spend two hours of their time being put to good use, using their own particular talents. What they do is up to you. You win them, you choose.'

The crowd gasped and then applauded. This was a new dimension to the ball and only suggested by Bentley because it meant no initial outlay in purchasing auction prizes. He smiled and mentally patted himself on the back.

Severus Snape scowled at the crowd. He could not believe that he had been dragged into this ridiculous charade, to be paraded in front of people and sold like a piece of meat. He would not be forced to clean someone's house or assist with children's homework, some of the more exciting tasks they may have to carry out. He scowled again in the hope it may put people off bidding for him. As far as Severus was concerned, there was only one good thing about this auction. He looked into the crowd and nodded at Mundungus Fletcher, who grunted and nodded back. Severus smirked. He knew Mundungus would carry out his instructions; he had too much to lose. Severus smiled to himself as he recalled walking into Fat Sam's Magical Equipment Store in Diagon Alley and observed a badly disillusioned Mundungus helping himself to the goods. He owed him one. Severus had allowed him to walk out of the store unchallenged, he knew he could manipulate the situation to his advantage at some point and that time was now.

Bentley stepped forward. 'Our first volunteer is Professor Weasley. Step forward please, Professor.'

Hermione glanced at him and stepped forward, forcing a smile onto her face.

'Professor Weasley teaches Potions here at Hogwarts, taking over from the illustrious Professor Snape when he moved into Defence Against the Dark Arts. Now, Mrs Weasley has agreed to tidy houses or office buildings or even use her Potions talents. Perhaps you need a love potion to tempt that certain someone?' Bentley smiled around the room as Hermione closed her eyes and winced. 'So what am I bid for the lovely, and if I may say it very beautiful, Professor Weasley?'

The bidding began, first Ron putting up twenty galleons, followed by a tall woman with her hair tied up severely on her head towards the back of the room, who upped the ante to forty galleons.

'Forty galleons? Is that all? Come now, ladies and gents, really….'Bentley shook his head sadly.

Severus glared at Mundungus, who shuffled to the front of the crowd.

'Three hundred Galleons, Mr Arkwright, Sir…' He called up. Hermione gasped. Three hundred? She looked over at Ron who mouthed 'sorry'. Their budget was only One Hundred galleons.

'Well, well, Mr Fletcher, that is more like it! Any further bids?' He looked around the room hopefully. 'Didn't think so,' he muttered under his breath. 'Professor Weasley to Mundungus Fletcher for three hundred Galleons!'

A cheer ran around the room and Hermione looked at Mundungus with disgust, but smiled a small smile to herself.

'Next up, the man himself, Professor Snape. Step forward, there's a good man.'

Bentley started to laugh but Severus stopped him with a glare.

'Right then, yes. Professor Snape, well known to all. Hero of the hour only a few short years ago… hasn't specified what tasks he's prepared to undertake, but I'm sure someone can find a use for him,' Bentley smiled hopefully.

Lavender Brown immediately shot her hand in the air. 'Fifty Galleons.'

Hermione glared at her. They had agreed to take it slowly. Lavender caught her eye and blushed.

Narcissa Malfoy stepped forward and pointedly looked Severus up and down. He spread his hands out as if to say 'Come and get me.' He smirked a little. This would be fun.

'Two hundred Galleons.' Narcissa drawled at Bentley.

'Well well, a bidding war, perhaps, what say you?' He looked over at Lavender.

'Three hundred Galleons…' she sputtered.

'Four Hundred…' Narcissa looked down her nose at Lavender, who glanced briefly at Hermione who lifted a finger imperceptibly.

Lavender pulled herself up to her full height. 'One thousand Galleons,' she stated clearly.

The crowd gasped, and Snape stared down at her incredulously. His eyes flicked towards Bentley who was beaming from ear to ear.

'Excellent bid! Well, Madame Malfoy, the ball is in your court, I believe?'

Narcissa glared at Lavender, who started to quail in her shoes. Hermione rolled her eyes.

Narcissa looked up at Severus. 'Next time, old friend. Forgive me.' she purred, then turned and slinked her way to the back of the room.

Hermione's hard eyes followed her as she walked away.

'Well done young lady! You have won yourself a Professor!' Bentley clapped his hands and Lavender let out a small gasp of relief and smiled broadly.

Unseen, two teachers caught each other's eye for a brief moment, then the auction continued.