The Jasper and the Ed Episode 2 Monkey-ing around

"No Edward! Stay away from the poor kitty!" Bella shouted in her sleep. I sighed at the insanity. What use would I have for a cat? "Let go of my monkey!!" Hmm...that gave me an idea. As if on que, there was a light rap on the window. I got up carefully, and opened the window for Jasper.

"SO what are we going to do tonight Edward?" He asked. A smile played on my lips.

"The same thing we do every night, Jasper. We're going to take over the world!" Emmett began singing below.

"The Jasper and the Ed, the Jasper and the Ed, One is a- OOWW!" He was cut off by a potato whacking him in the head, that I kept in my pocket for circumstances like this. We quickly jumped down to land beside him.

"What's the plan?" Emmett asked curiously, already recovered from the head blow. I smirked.

"All will be revealed in due time. But for now, to the takeovertheworld mobile!" We ran to my volvo. After a few minutes of driving, we arrived at a large metal gate. I turned and quickly filled my sidekicks in on their part in my plot.

Jasper's POV

I slid quietly past a snoring guard, toward a large room. Sure enough, just as Edward had predicted, there was a tubby man reading the paper at his desk.

"Excuse me..." I began. His head snapped up.

"This is personnel only, sonny." He told me, beginning to shoo me out. I pouted.

"But I need...help."

Emmett's POV

Silly humans, needing sleep. It made my job so much easier, and not to mention more boring. I found the man Edward had described, slumped in a chair, a rumbling sound coming from him. What was that? I made a mental note to ask Bella later. I walked forward, grasping the metal ring attached to his belt. He turned slightly, and I froze, but then he lapsed back into his noisy slumber. Silly humans.

Edward's POV

I watched as my plan unfurled before me. Jasper had the guard's full attention now, and Emmett was jogging toward me with the set of master keys I needed. He handed them to me wordlessly, and I turned and inserted one into the metal keyhole. The gate creaked open. I motioned Emmett forward, and we walked through the area, past cage after cage containing what could have been dinner. I arrived at the one I wanted, and smiled, raising the key to the slot.

"EDWARD!" Emmett all but shouted in my ear.

"What?" I snapped, eager to get my plan underway, for strands of light were bleeding from the horizon.

"What's the plan?" I sighed.

"We will unlock this cage, and release the monkeys inside. They will be enlisted in our monkey army, and take out our opposition, giving us free reign." I explained quickly.

"Why monkeys?" He asked curiously.

"Because when we're walking around, monkey army in tow, and someone disobeys us, we can say 'Now now, no monkey-ing around.'" He nodded, smiling. Turning back to the cage, I unlocked it, swinging the door open. But wait! I hadn't counted on! Aaah!

King Monkey the Third's POV

I watched as the blood-drinker explained his harebrained scheme to his companion.

"They plan to enslave us." I translated to the rest of the monkeys, who weren't very fluent in the strange words the blood-drinkers were saying. My right hand monkey snorted.

"Shall we show them we don't monkey-around?" I shook my head at the bad pun.

"We shall attack." I commanded, swinging to a high branch. The blood-drinker smirked at us, and opened the cage door.

"CHARGE!"

Edward's POV

The monkeys were suprisingly hard to get back in their cages. They leapt out at us, clawing and scratching. I now sat in the takeovertheworld mobile, thinking, trying to find a way to salvage the failure. Jasper came clomping back to the car, and took his seat in the back.

"So how'd it go?" He asked expectantly. I saw Emmett shake his head in the rear view mirror. Jaspers face fell, then perked back up again.

"There's also tomorrow night!" He suggested, and my thoughts turned around too. There was...

"Yes...there is...and next time we will not monkey around..." I felt the edges of a plan form in my mind.

A/N: Lets try this again... this is the second time rewriting this... Anyway, I thought the King Monkey thing was funny. Oh! Monkey idea goes to DANGERvenom. Sorry for stupid mistakes, I'm tired and irritable.

I live in Ontario, Canada, not New York.