Yo! Everybody! Here's one of my submissions to Zaratan's Halloween Hijinx contest… I will be also trying very hard to enter a second story, if I get a chance to.

Disclaimer: I do not own ANY of the characters involved in the following story. There are also references to actual products, which I also do not have any affiliation with…

HenchCo's First Annual Villain and Hero Halloween Costume Contest and Party

(AKA: HenchCo's Folly)

"You want me to wear WHAT?" Dr. Drakken yelped when his cousin Edward suggested what they wear to Jack Hench's Halloween party.

"Aw c'mon 'cuz… it'll be GREAT! Our costumes ROCK and we'll be sure to win that prize money, seriously. 70/30 split… remember?"

"What? I remember it being 50/50… Eddie." Drew said giving his cousin the hairy eyeball.

"Yeah whatever… Just get in your costume and let's go. We're going to be late. Seriously."

After waiting for another 15 minutes, Dr. Drakken, AKA Drew Lipsky, and Motor Ed, AKA Edward Lipsky, climbed into one of Drakken's hover cars and headed out to the big party. With the advantage of travelling in a vehicle that didn't need roads, that meant no traffic. So it didn't take them very long to arrive at the Tri-City Convention Center.

…x x x x…

"C'mon Eddie… I thought you said we were running behind." Drakken said as he was a few steps away from the parked hover car, looking back at his cousin. He could tell that Eddie was fidgeting, and pulling on part of his costume.

"Hang on Dude, I gotta… adjust. This things giving me a wedgie… Seriously."

"I SO did not need to hear that." Drakken said with a slap to his face, and when he dropped his hand, Eddie was suddenly standing next to him. "How did you…?"

"C'mon Drew… hop to it. We're gonna miss the costume contest! Seriously!" Drakken responded by grinding his teeth, and eliciting a small growl.

After crossing the parking lot as fast as they could, the two cousins finally entered the convention center by bursting through the front glass doors. Instantly they were confronted by a small group of henchmen, all wearing the distinctive uniforms that said they worked for Jack Hench himself.

Eddie was the first to speak, raising his hands to show he didn't have any weapons. "Whoa dudes… wait a sec. We're here for the costume contest… Seriously. Are we on time?"

One of the henchmen looked up and down at both Ed and Drew Lipsky with a raised eyebrow and spoke. "All contestants need to line up on the right side of the stage. You two just made it in time… Now get up there before we decide to throw you two out for indecent exposure."

The two cousins looked at each other with confused looks on their faces, and then scurried off the get in line next to the stage. They were in such a hurry, the two never once noticed the various reactions that people in the audience were having to their costumes. They ranged from horror, to disgust, to outright laughter. There were a few that actually looked like they might even throw up.

"Did you just feel a draft?" Eddie asked Drew as they stood in line behind someone who was wearing a large plastic mask and an impeccable suit.

Drakken just shook his head, and then turned to the person standing in front of him. "Who are YOU supposed to be?" Drakken asked after tapping the man on the shoulder, and he turned around.

A high pitched, annoying voice echoed from behind the mask. "I'm Richard Nixon! Can't you tell?"

"Lucre? Is that you?" Drakken asked with narrowed eyes, and Francis Lerman pulled the plastic mask up and rested it on top of his head.

"Oh! I should have known it was you Dr. Drakken." Lucre said with a big smile. "I SO glad you came." He then noticed the costumes that Drakken and his cousin were wearing. "Great costumes guys… but… didn't you forget something?" He pointed down towards the legs of both men.

"Umm… No." Was Drakken's reply, and he glanced at Eddie with a questioning look. "I don't think so… did we?" Before Edie could respond, a voice boomed from the speakers mounted throughout the room.

It was none other than Jack Hench. "Good evening one and all to the First Annual HenchCo's Villain and Hero Halloween Costume party." There was a bit of polite applause from everyone in the audience. "I'm sure you can all see the line to my left, that is made up of all those who are participating in the costume contest. Please give them all a round of applause for subjecting themselves to the humiliation of walking across stage, and being judged." Polite applause echoed through the room.

"Speaking of judges… Let me introduce the three of them to you. To make things as equal as we can, there is one judge representing the villains, and one judge representing the heroes. I will be the deciding factor if there is a tie. First let me introduce… me. My name is Jack Hench, and I am the single largest supplier of Henchmen in the business."

Once again, a small smattering of applause came from the room of about 50 or so people that were in attendance. "Representing the hero side, there is Mr. Timothy North, who was also known in his younger days as the Fearless Ferret." This time the applause was more pronounced as the aging actor stood from his chair and waved.

Jack continued with his introductions. "Representing the villain's side, we have someone who is known only as Gill. He was previously known as teenager Gilbert Moss until he was mutated by toxic runoff into Lake Wannaweep." The applause for Gill wasn't a great as that for Timothy North, but he still stood and waved a finned hand to the audience.

"After I introduce all of the participants in the costume contest, the voting will then commence. There will be four awards, and they will be as follows: Most Original, in which the winner will get 100 dollars. The Sexiest, in which the winner receives 500 dollars. Best Overall, in which the winner receives one thousand dollars. The fourth award is a Mystery Award, which will be revealed and announced after all other awards. The prize for this will also be a surprise.

"After the winners are announced there will also be a dance. We also have a wet bar, for those who are of drinking age. Need I remind you, the bartender WILL be checking ID's, and they are trained in spotting fake ones… Now, without further ado… Let me introduce to you the first contestant in tonight's costume contest." Jack looked to his left, and saw the first two… well, actually one and what looked like a statue, come onto the stage.

Acting as MC for the remainder of the event, Jack Hench read from small 3x5 cards. "This is DNAmy and her partner, Monkey Fist. As you all know, Mr. Fist was turned to stone a while back, so he is not entitled to any winnings, but DNAmy will take his share. DNAmy is dressed as an… OtterFly? Is that correct?" Jack looked at Amy who nodded with a big grin on her face as she pushed Monkey Fist ahead of her on a two-wheel cart. "And apparently Monkey Fist is dressed as a… RabbOnkey?" DNAmy nodded again and readjusted the fake rabbit ears that were in place on top of Fist's stone head. Polite applause drifted through the audience again as the two judges scribbled notes down onto small notebooks.

"Next, we have Camille Leon as… Camille Leon?" Jack was a bit confused, as Camille had strolled onto the stage looking as she always had.

"Hey… you can't get any better than this." Camille said while striking a pose. "But this isn't my contest submission." The shape-shifting starlette then closed her eyes, and suddenly she morphed into a perfect copy of Scarlet O'Hara from the movie "Gone with the Wind". The audience showed their appreciation for a classic with more than just polite applause.

"That's all I get?" Camille huffed, and morphed back into herself before leaving the stage. Again, the two judges made some notes.

"I guess so much for depending on the kindness of strangers, huh?" Jack quipped, and received nary a laugh. With a bit of a sigh, he then continued. "Next, we have a group of heroes called the Go Team."

Hego, Mego, and the Wego's strolled out onto the stage amid a series of boo's and hisses. The audience response was mainly because it as made up of mostly villains, but also because of Team Go's costumes. They were all four dressed as cops. Keystone Cops, to be exact. They quickly did a small skit of slap-stick and prat-falls before leaving the stage. Howls of laughter followed, as when they left the stage, Mego tripped and fell into the Wego's, who fell into each other, and then into Hego. All four ended up in a mass of arms and legs and rolled off the front of the stage. All four quickly stood back up, not any worse for wear, but very embarrassed.

At seeing the accident with the Go Team, Jack Hench drew a hand across his face, not quite believing what a bunch of boobs the team of Heroes were. He then looked at his note cards, cleared his throat, and announced the next contestant.

"Next we have Professor Dementor as…Is this right? Superman?"

"Ja! That is correct!" The diminutive Villain said as he stepped onto the stage. Still wearing his signature helmet, Professor Dementor was also wearing the distinctive red and blue of Superman, complete with cape. He then reached over and pressed a button on his belt. Then he raised his arms in the classic pose, and yelled out, "Up, up and avay!"

A small jet pack strapped to his back came to life, making this modest version of Superman take flight. He made a few loops over the audience before finally returning back to the stage, and landing next to Jack Hench.

As Professor Dementor started to walk off stage, Jack called out. "Oh Superman?"

"Ja?" The small man responded, and suddenly sniffed at the air.

"You're capes on fire."

"Aaahhhh!" The miniature Superman yelled as he ran off stage to find some water. His voice then echoed out onto the stage as he was screaming at someone else. "Myron! You told me zis cape vas FIRE PROOF!"

Jack Hench cringed at the volume of the man's voice, and then proceeded to announce the next person. "Let's see here… Next we have a young woman by the name of Adrena Lynn who is dressed as a… Vampiress? What is that?"

Adrena Lynn proceeded to slink out onto the stage dressed in an all black dress that was severely low cut, and went down to her ankles in hem length. The dress hugged her body snuggly, and a string of black pearls adorned her neck that went dangerously low between her breasts. Jack unknowingly began to straighten his tie as she strode up to him.

Before he could even say "Hi", Adrena opened her mouth in a gruesome smile that exposed the fangs she had in her mouth, and said her signature word, "Freaky!" Jack immediately backed off a few steps, and let her pass in front of him so she could leave the stage.

"Most definitely… freaky." Jack said, and once again raised his cards to read the next person in the contest. "Next we have Gemini, and he's dressed as… Steve Austin? Who's that?"

Gemini strode out onto the stage in a pair of dress slacks and a MeZod collard shirt. His left eye looked like it had a bit of a squint, and in his robotic hand it looked like he was carrying a steel ball of some kind.

"You know… Steve Austin… The Six Million Dollar Man? The bionic man?" Gemini then raised his metal hand and crushed the ball in his hand, and dropped it onto the stage. It landed with a loud 'thunk', and splintered some of the wood. "That, my friends, was a 16 pound shot-put. I do hope the judges realize that this is NOT a costume." He then raised his metal hand and made a fist before walking off the stage as all of the other contestants had before.

"Need I remind the contestants that there is no intimidating of the judges…" Jack said when he saw that the two judges were watching Gemini leaving the stage with worried looks. Gill took a drink of water to keep himself hydrated, but the glass noticeably shook as he raised it to his mouth. Mr. North just narrowed his eyes at Gemini and mouthed the word 'Punk'.

"Let's continue… shall we?" Jack said trying to get things rolling once again. "We had another group entrant at this time, but they couldn't make it as they are still in jail. The group known as 'The Fasionistas' will be stricken from voting. We do have another pair at this time though who are taking their spot. It is Señor Senior Senior, and his son, Junior. They are dressed as…" Jack chuckled a bit to himself, "Prisoners."

Señor and Junior strode out onto the stage dressed in the classic 1920's prison garb of black and white stripes. Each of them carried a fairly large steel ball, which was chained to an ankle. They each gave a smile, exposing blacked out teeth, which completed their ensemble. There was a bit of applause from the audience, but not much.

"Come, Junior. I thought this was going to be the perfect costume for us, but alas, I guess not." The younger Senior then followed his sulking father off the stage.

Junior's high-pitched voice could then be heard just behind the curtain. "But Father… I wanted to make this my second singing debut by performing the classic hit, Jail House Rock!"

"I'm sorry…" Jack said, "Singing is not allowed in this contest. The next contestant is Kill…" A crash was then heard off to one side of the stage, and the distinctive sound of a plasma blast was also heard. A ball of green plasma flew out from the right side of the stage causing Jack to duck.

While straightening himself, Jack then saw, of all people… Shego come out onto the stage. "But you're not on the list."

"Oh, I think you better check that list again." The green woman said while igniting a hand with her signature plasma glow. Shego stood with one hand on an out thrust hip, and she wore the same jump suit that she always wore.

"But you're not even in costume." Jack said trying to put on a brave face. "This is a costume contest, you know…"

"Excuse me?" Shego said, and pointed at her face. Then Jack and everyone else saw what the green woman was indicating. It was a simple black mask that went around her eyes. It was simple, classic, and made her look even more dangerous than before.

"So… umm, what do you call yourself?" Jack asked, and flinched a bit when Shego leaned into his ear and whispered something.

"Ah… yes. Of course." Jack Hench then lavishly indicated with his hands the stunning woman before him. "Here is Shego known simply as… The Villainess!"

Shego kept her stance with the hip out, and her hand still resting on said hip, but the other hand was raised and sheathed in her green and black plasma flame, which was at least a foot high. The look on her face could only be described as pure, unadulterated… evil. Albeit sexy evil. The crowd responded with the best round of applause yet, which also included a few catcalls. Shego immediately silenced those catcalls with a couple of well-placed plasma shots.

After the applause died down, the dangerous looking green woman doused her plasma flame, and strode off the stage. She glanced over at the judges and blew a seductive kiss to each one, causing each to respond with goofy looking grins.

After watching the swaying hips of Shego sashay seductively off said stage, Jack finally was able to regain his composure. He cleared his throat again for possibly the third or fourth time tonight, and announced the next to come out on stage.

"As I said before we were interrupted, the next person to come out here is Duff Killigan. He is dressed as…" Jack's eyes narrowed at the card. "Who is this?"

Duff Killigan strode out onto the stage dressed in what could only be described as medieval Scotland garb. The jacket he wore was buttoned at an angle across his chest, and a shawl was draped over his shoulders, which was connected in front with an elaborate clasp. On top of his head was a strange winged animal that had a pointed tail, and around his waist was, of course, a kilt.

"I am Sir William Wallace, Knight of Elderslie, ya dolt!"

"Ahh…" Was Jack's initial reaction. "Wasn't the man drawn and quartered? Then gutted, AND beheaded?"

Killigan dropped his head. "Aye…"

"You're not going to do any of that here, are you?" Jack asked pensively.

"Ach! No! I jus wanted to dress up as the man! I thought the lot of ye would at least know yer Scottish history?"

"Sorry…" Jack said, feeling properly chastised. He then watched Killigan as the man stormed off the stage, his boots thumping on the hard wood floor. His stride was quick enough that it kicked his kilt up a bit, showing a bit of a hairy leg, which Jack just happened to see.

"Ohh… I did NOT need to see that." Jack said to himself, and he then promptly turned back to the audience who was patiently waiting for him to announce the next person to come onto the stage. "Our next, and last, Hero group of the night is none other than… Kim Possible and her sidekick."

A chorus of boo's erupted just before the two young heroes entered the stage, but everyone suddenly became quiet as soon as Kim and Ron entered from the right. The Teen Heroes were dressed as none other than Bonnie and Clyde. Rufus was perched on Ron's shoulder dressed in a miniature Seer Sucker Suit, looking like the duo's partner, Buck Barrow.

But it wasn't the suit that Ron or Rufus was wearing that everyone was looking at, it was Kim Possible. She wore a tight gray pinstriped skirt that hugged her legs and hips quite nicely, which went down to just above her knees. She wore a matching jacket that was open in front, showing a bit of cleavage, which was pushed up by what she was wearing underneath. A white collard shirt was around her neck, and atop her head, sitting slightly askance, was a matching Fedora hat.

If the suit that Kim wore wasn't enough to get everyone's attention, the large mint condition Thompson Machine Gun that she also carried was also garnering a few glances as well. The three of them struck a pose in the center of the stage, looking out over the audience. Kim glanced at Ron, who then nodded with a toothpick in his mouth, and Kim fired a few quick rounds into the air making everyone duck for cover.

After uncovering his ears, Jack yelled at the two young heroes. "I thought there wasn't supposed to be any weapons allowed!" He then looked over at two of his own personal henchmen with a questioning look.

"Relax Jack…" Kim said. "Those were nothing but blanks in the gun. I had everything approved by your guards before even entering the building."

"Ya gotta admit Jack…" Ron said with a smile, "The gun really makes the costume. Doesn't it?"

"Yeah… heh heh… it does indeed." Kim and Ron then walked off the stage, amid the most rousing round of applause since the start. It was even more than what Shego her self had garnered. The green villainess stood back stage, growling at the reaction of the crowd.

"The next person we have is another single entrant, and it's a mister… Frugal Lucre. Almost immediately a lone person came bounding out from behind the curtains with a large plastic mask of Richard Nixon covering his face. He was holding his hands up with two of his fingers held in the 'Peace' gesture.

Slowing down his pace a bit, 'Richard Nixon' came up beside Jack Hench, and spoke into the microphone. "I am not a crook!" The audience howled in laughter, and Frugal Lucre beamed underneath his mask as he left the stage, still showing the 'peace' sign with his fingers.

"Well that was… interesting." Jack said, adjusting his tie. "The last two entries were a bit late, but made it in just on time. It's none other than the two cousins, Motor Ed, and Dr. Drakken. I'm not sure what they are wearing, but…"

Jack Hench's mouth stopped working as it had dropped open when he looked over at the last two contestants. Ed and Drew Lipsky strode out onto the stage amid… silence. Everyone in the audience, including all the previous contestants who were looking on from backstage had the same look on their faces… pure, abject, horror.

There, standing on stage, were two grown men, wearing dresses. But they weren't your ordinary everyday dresses. Ed Lipsky was wearing a cheer leader outfit of the same color and style that Kim wore her senior year in High School. Atop his head was a red wig, covering his own long blond hair. In essence, Motor Ed, AKA Edward Lipsky, was dressed as non-other than Kim Possible herself!

The dress that Dr. Drakken, AKA Drew Lipsky wore, was quite different. For all intense and purposes, it looked exactly like the dress that Shego had worn when they were at the Bermuda Triangle Night Club a couple years ago. In fact, it WAS the exact same dress, but Drakken was not going to tell Shego. But there was one minor detail that both men had seemed to have forgotten. Neither of them had worn any kind of leggings, or took the initiative to actually shave their quite hairy… legs.

In an effort to alleviate the heavy silence that enshrouded the entire gathering, Ed decided to raise a hand and yell out "Go Mad Dogs!" The action of his raising a hand up high did two things simultaneously. One, it exposed his hairy arm pit, and two, the stretching of his side made the skirt that he had specially made to fit him suddenly drop down to his ankles. Underneath all the man had on were his tighty whities.

Someone in the audience shrieked, and it suddenly became a mad house of everyone trying to leave the building.

"Wait!" Drakken said as he too then reached out, and tripped on the high-heeled boots that was now wearing. As he fell, a loud ripping sound could be heard, and Drakken promptly fell flat on his face, his butt up in the air so everyone could see his blue plaid checkered boxer shorts.

The last thing everyone heard before the room completely emptied was Shego yelling at Drakken, "That SO better not be my actual dress, Drakken!"

Amid all this chaos stood the MC, one Jack Hench. He just tossed the 3x5 cards he had been reading from into the air, and dropped his head into his hands mumbling, "I am NEVER doing this again."

To be concluded with the winners of HenchCo's First Annual Villain and Hero Halloween Costume Contest and Party… I will have this posted no later than Friday or Saturday night…

Hope y'all have enjoyed this so far!