First and foremost, I would like to apologize for not updating for a loooong time. I don't know any way to compensate to you guys other than presenting this chapter. So please, do enjoy the chapter, and don't forget to review! Your every word is precious to me :)

Note: Le Destinee's Chapter 20 is almost done, left is PR. So make sure you tune in!

Disclaimer: You know the drill.

未来のために ~ 第五章 ~

.Mich.

"To tell the truth, I didn't really want to get involved."

A dream?

"Are you sure about this? For every decision you make, you will have to bear responsibility for it."

"Yes."

It's too dark and fuzzy . . . I can't see a thing . . .

"Why didn't you want to remember them all?"

"Cause' it's too painful?"

"No . . ."

"Cause' you are meant to be forgotten?"

Forgotten?

"She's too immersed in it. Try to distract her a little."

"Understood."

Naoko's . . . voice?

"I'm so sorry Mikan, it was never meant to happen this way . . ."

"It's okay Mom . . ."

Mom?

" . . . it's not your fault. It was I myself who chose to do this. So please . . . don't blame yourself . . . "

"Take these Alice stones. Make sure you keep it safely with you and never ever let it fall into the Anti-Alice's hands."

"Take her away! Why is she conversing with a corpse?

Corpse? Oh yeah, now I remember. It was after . . . that.

My vision suddenly was blinded with flashes of light and by mere seconds, the light was gone and replaced with a gigantic screen.

Fire. Rain. A girl. A boy. Blood.

I couldn't hear them speak – I could only make out a few incoherent words when their lips moved.

It was weird. I could hear the rain falling down heavily onto the grounds and the wild red flames roaring behind the scene. But I just could not hear a single word they say.

The boy looked as if he was crying under the rain, begging. While the girl looked at him, bored as she kept a monotonous face.

Are you remembering?

The gigantic screen immediately extinguished and I was greeted with pitch black. And another screen appeared. This time, clearer.

I could see the woman who handed me the bag containing the 'Alice stones' started whispering to me.

"Mikan, live."

SLASH.

I could feel hot liquid being splashed onto my face. I tried to open my eyes, but when I did, the light above me was blinding my sight, and the next thing I know, I felt a weight fell on my stomach.

It was 'Mom'. Dead.

I woke up and immediately sat up. My mouth opened and tried to calm myself, breathless. My face was dripping with sweat and my right hand grabbed the wrinkled blanket.

"Mikan!"

The calling of my name instantly made me turn towards the person, and I could see her face stricken with horror.

"What happened?!"

Naoko rushed to my side from the opened door, I turned around, there was no one else in the house. She left her sling bag on the floor and sat on my bed.

"I saw the door opened wide and when I came in, you were lying here, but you don't look like you're sleeping! More like you've fainted! Did you know how much it scared me when I saw you just a moment ago?"

"I …"

I couldn't speak a word. I was still sweating profusely as I felt my whole body wet and sticky, a few drops of it fell on my hands.

What was that? A nightmare? It's too damn real to be one.

"Was there … no one else in the house when you came in?" I whispered.

Naoko, in return, shook her head. "I just saw you, lying there, like you've passed out. And I thought the house's being burgled. But everything seemed untouched and looked the same when I went out this morning."

I composed myself, not as breathless as before. I turned to look at the blonde girl, and immediately pain rushed into my head.

"Argh!" I whimpered as I placed both of my hands at my ears.

"What's the matter?" Naoko tried to put her hand on my shoulder, her face concerned.

"Don't touch me!" I yelled at her. And then, I realized… I turned to look at her, "I mean, Naoko, I mean."

She was dumbfounded, shocked as she placed her hand back on her lap. "I'll …make you something to eat."

What the hell was that? It felt like someone just took over my body and controlled me.

I slumped back down at the bed with my arms wide open. I stared at the ceiling, my mind wandering aimlessly as I smelled the fragrant aroma coming from the kitchen.

"Here. Eat something." Naoko approached me with a tray complete with a bowl of porridge and some small fish.

"Thank you Naoko-chan. And I'm sorry about earlier." I looked at her as she placed the tray on my lap.

"Don't worry about that. Now eat up." She smiled at me gently, her finger pointing at the bowl.

"Oh by the way, Mikan-chan. I just got promoted."

She beamed at me and showed me a piece of envelope. "It's my promotion letter, together with my bonus! So you want to hang out this Tuesday? I finally get a day-off after working for seven days a week for like two years already!"

Tuesday. Oh yeah. The meeting.

"Oh I'm sorry Naoko-chan." Mikan cut the girl half-way through her ranting. The latter stared at her questioningly, urging her to continue.

"I've … I've got something to do on Tuesday …"

Naoko frowned, her enthusiasm wavered a little. "I guess … It's alright then. Anyway," she touched my forehead , "I think your fever's gone down. You'll be fine. Now get some rest. I'll wake up you up tomorrow."

"Thank you, Naoko-chan. And sorry about that earlier."

She smiled at me gently and shook her head. "No problem."

And within minutes, I slept on my comfortable bed, peaceful at last. But the content of the nightmare was inevitably disturbing.

-

Sunday's the day, the busiest day of the week.

People rushing in and out of the bank.

Clearing off bills, making claims and etcetera.

Sometimes I get to meet up with people I've lost contact with since the days after Alice Academy was destroyed and the Anti-Alice Organization took over the government.

Rare chances they were, but we only get to talk for brief moments as either me or the person are busy of our own errands.

"Hotaru! Why are you here?"

"I'm here to ask you out for lunch of course dummy, what else." The lady replied dryly, her head shaking slightly at the thought of her once best friend's –me and my oblivious side.

There was something different about Hotaru today. The way she dressed I mean. She didn't look like a private investigator, at all. She was wearing a purple tank top, the sleeves almost hitched up to her shoulders and she had a khaki pants on. She looked like a regular person walking across the streets.

"Are you done drooling yet Mikan?" she muttered when she noticed I was looking her up to down and up again.

"Oh wait. Hold on." I snapped my gaze back at my desk and tidied it before walking towards Hotaru and off to lunch.

After walking across a few blocks and arguing with Hotaru whether to have Korean or Indian, we finally settled in a Chinese restaurant. When we walked into the restaurant, I was partially impressed. I don't usually dine in Chinese', so I don't know much about the architecture but this place is simply amazing. Though it was obvious that they have put red in emphasis, the slightly brown and gold-ish pillars across the dining hall give a mild ancient and homely feeling, and it was nostalgic. We seated on the table far right to the window, where we can get a full view of the streets. We ordered a plate of Chinese style fried rice and a bowl of hot soup noodles.

"Ugh. The chopsticks hate me."

I was practically struggling eating the noodles using chopsticks. I was a quite fluent user back then in the Academy, but ever since it happened, I stopped using chopsticks and opted for the western cutlery instead. And Hotaru just rolled her eyes at me and stretched her arm out to grab the chopsticks from me. And when she did that, her sleeve hitched up a little and I saw a scar at her right shoulder. Something is wrong, I thought, as Hotaru is known to have flawless pure white skin, and she wouldn't allow herself to obtain such a scar, a big one in fact.

I leaned in a little to have a good look at the scar, and my heart skipped a beat when I saw the form of the scar. It was a clean cut of the Japanese kanji '桜', and my hand unconsciously reached out and grabbed her shoulder, resulting on the wooden chopsticks to clang away softly and a shocked Hotaru.

Her amethyst eyes were widened as she sat back on her chair and resumed eating her plate of fried rice as if nothing had happened.

"What … what is that scar?" I stammered as my hands trembled on my shaking legs. My body has been giving out strange reactions towards different things ever since I was drugged and after I had the terrible nightmare.

Though I knew I was in fact drugged, I dismissed the thought of someone trying to threaten me, should my real identity be leaked out. Naoko knows nothing either, so it was no point in asking her. It was my fault at first, to let my guard down in the first place by accepting the anonymous yet necessary items.

As if contemplating whether to tell me or not, Hotaru fidgeted uncomfortably on her chair. She had already finished her meal.

"Mikan." she started off with a serious look and cold eyes. "Do you know what this character meant?"

My heart skipped a beat again when she rolled her sleeve up until the part where the scar lies.

"Yes. It means … Sakura."

"It's your trademark."

She sighed heavily, slightly shaking her head at the situation.

My trademark?

"What are you talking about?" I chortled. "You're meaning that I inflicted that scar on you? Stop kidding Hotaru."

"Yes."

It suddenly became awkward. The silence that enveloped us despite of the crowded dining hall. I moved uncomfortably on my chair.

She sighed again and broke the silence. "Don't worry, it's not like you done it on purpose. I bet you don't remember it anyway. Just come on Tuesday, you'll be able to clear off the confusion on your mind then." She paused as she took a sip of Orange Juice, "Bill please!"

-

"Stop getting messed up with the scar idiot."

We were walking back from the Chinese restaurant to my working place when Hotaru suddenly yelled at me and hit me on the head.

"Ouch!"

"I said, stop getting that dumb brain of yours messed up because of this silly scar. It's nothing."

I hung my head low. "There must be reason that you didn't use your invention or whatever to scrap off that scar. I know how much flawless skin is important to you! There must be something! Something really important! But I can't … I can't remember it …"

"Hey Mik—"

I groaned in pain. It's back! The same pain I felt when Naoko tried to touch me. It's like eating me from the inside. I knelt down on the streets, my eyes firmly closed as I bit my lip. My head felt like it was about to break apart. Without me knowing, tears started flowing down my cheeks and when the pain became completely unbearable, I let out a sharp high-pitched scream and then, the pain was gone.

-

"Like I said, I didn't know what the hell happened."

Blink.

"I'm a private investigator, would I be stupid enough to stay beside my target if I was an assassin?"

Blink.

"You're completely ridiculous, now get out of the room before something real bad happens to you."

Blink.

"Hotaru?"

"Yes Mikan?"

"Where are you?"

"I'm right here."

"Open your eyes Mikan."

"It's opened! But I can't see a thing!"

Hotaru leaned it to take a look at the girl's eyes. Indeed it was opened. But above her hazel pupils was a layer of green shining fluid.

"Okay Mikan. Calm down."

She took a few deep breaths while grabbing tightly on Hotaru's hands.

"Tell me, is your eyes watery. Any liquid flowing?"

"No. It's dry. Why?"

"Because I'm looking into your eyes now and it is not your usual brown. It's covered with some kind of green shining layer. And it's floating around your pupils as if it's fluid."

BREATHE.

Her head immediately snapped towards the direction where she heard someone else breathing. "Who's there?"

I felt Hotaru's hands on me loosen. "There's someone there." I whispered softly.

Nogi .

The name chimed in my mind. Nogi Ruka.

"Ruka?"

I heard soft gasps and Hotaru squeezed my hands. "Ruka?" I called again.

"I remembered you'd always called me by Ruka-pyon though. But Ruka's good enough."

"Ruka!"

I felt him embracing me, a warm hug I'd always wanted since like forever. It felt really good, and though I can't see, I knew he was smiling then.

But something triggered within me. My arms, which were around Ruka's neck, slowly slid off and my hand unconsciously touched the back of his neck.

It's there!

"How did you know it was him?" Hotaru asked, her tone questioning.

I removed myself from the hug, both my hands still at his shoulders as I turned my head towards the girl. "I kinda heard someone breathing really softly at the side, and then suddenly his name just chimed in my mind."

"Weird huh," Ruka said, "Your instincts are still as good as Nat—"

"Nat—?"

I heard Ruka coughing a little as I removed my hands from his body and the weight on the bed was no more.

He has the scar too.

"Heh Nogi, it seems like you and Mikan have a pretty strong bond heh?"

I knew Hotaru was teasing him again – from her tone, and he just cleared his throat to avoid the topic.

"Just want to tell you that nothing could describe how much I'm glad to have you back here Mikan. And I was really shocked when Imai told me that you fainted."

"You guys—" I paused, "—still Nogi and Imai?"

This time, Ruka coughed even louder. "We're just accomplices, that's all.

I chuckled. "I smell something fishy though."

"Anyway, Mikan." she completely cut me off, "What exactly happened back there?"

"Before that, Ruka."

I heard him respond.

"The back of your neck. The scar."

And I heard another human being in the room. The one who just tsk-ed.

"Did someone just tsk-ed at me?" I asked impatiently. I turned my head towards random directions as I couldn't confirm where that person was.

"Tsk-ed? Not that I heard anything?" Ruka reasoned.

"I might be hearing things. My body's been acting strangely recently. Anyway, like I said, the scar."

"Uh … Was there a scar?" I heard him ask, his tone shaky.

"Yes there is. I felt it when you hugged me just now." I retorted.

"Nah. There's no any scar there. Anyway, Hotaru, Mikan, I need to take my leave now. Hope to see you this Tuesday. And Mikan, thanks for coming back. Got to run, bye!"

CLOSE

"I knew you were here."

He grunted.

"Not that I'm worried about her or what. Let's go."

"I think she's regaining her memories. And she saw, I mean, felt my scar too. And it doesn't explain why she suddenly became blind."

"Ruka. I'm not deaf. I heard everything. And so what? I don't give a damn about her. Not anymore. I'm tired. Can we go?"

Ruka sighed. "Fine fine. Let's go to the pub near your house."

-

I felt Hotaru staring at me.

"What?"

"For now, I want you to stop talking about the scar. Not in front of anyone. The answer to your question will come eventually, hopefully by Tuesday. Now, I want you to tell me what exactly happened to you that brought you into this kind of state."

"I … I was down with a cold. Since Saturdays are my day-off, I stayed at home. Then sometime during the morning, someone knocked on my apartment door and when I opened it, there was only a white paper bag on the doorstep."

"And you accepted it." Hotaru said bluntly.

"Well … I did inspect the content, but it was just porridge and some drugs for my cold. And a get-well card. A creepy one." I winced at the thought of the card.

"And?"

"Then after eating the porridge, I kinda felt dizzy and I think I fainted. I don't know whether it's the drugs' effect or somebody just drugged my porridge. But I think the latter is much more logical. Before my consciousness went off, I heard the door opened and closed-locked and someone stroking my hair. But I couldn't do anything."

Hotaru stared at me, "Are you sure you are not violated?"

That phrase immediately struck me. "Was I?"

I heard Hotaru sigh again. "If you were a blonde, I would've have thought that you're a dumb blonde. No offence though."

"Naoko-chan's a blonde! She's not dumb … But she's childish most of the times."

"Ohh…" was what escaped her lips. "So she's a blonde … And I thought she was the one with brown hair the other day?"

"Well," I stifled a laugh, "apparently her dye came off and she was complaining about the quality of the color-lock shampoo the whole day."

"I see … Hey, you want some water?"

"Sure. Um, Hotaru. Are you okay? You sound … unmotivated."

I heard the sound of water pouring into something solid.

"Here. Water. And I'm fine." Hotaru took hold of my hands and placed it around the glass.

"Thanks. Okay, if you say so."

"So what about the dream?"

I took a gulp of the water and a deep breath after that. The dream was still fresh in my mind, crystal clear, and I remembered every single detail of it, or at least most of it.

"You see, it was just flashes of blurry images. There was something about Alice stones and someone whom I called 'Mom' and then I was brought into another scene where the rain was pouring heavily and fire everywhere, then there was a boy and a girl. They were talking, but I couldn't hear a single thing. And before anything happen, I saw that 'Mom' again, and apparently she was stabbed or something and the next thing I knew, there was blood everywhere and I woke up breathless after that. That pretty much sums up everything. But after that dream, my body seems to go haywire and all. I even yelled at Naoko for no reason at all when she tried to tend me when she found the apartment was broken into."

"Hold on, you said that someone opened your door and," she paused, "… violated you, right?"

"I wasn't violated." I hissed, irritated.

"Whatever. Then you said the door was opened, and closed BEFORE that stalker touched you right?"

I nodded meekly, trying to understand what Hotaru tried to imply.

"Then logically, when the person left your house, he or she would've closed the door, cause your apartment wasn't burgled nor was it messed up, right?"

"True." I responded.

"Hm … Nevermind. He or she probably just forgotten to close the door after violating you."

"I said I was not violated!" I snarled, completely ignoring that I was still in the hospital.

"Okay okay. Chill."

I smiled at her and plopped down on my pillow. Long day it is…

What I didn't know with my eyesight gone and all is that, Hotaru was uncomfortably fidgeting and her normally expressionless façade was replaced with a slight frown.

-

"Give me another glass of this."

"Whoa Natsume, that'll be like your ninth glass. You should really stop drinking. I don't want to carry you back home with all your pukes."

"Shut up Ruka. Either you drink with me or you leave."

Ruka looked at Natsume's wavering face, "You're exhausted."

"I told you I was tired, didn't I?" He replied dryly.

"That's not what I meant."

Natsume grunted as he gulped down another glass of tequila one-shot.

Seemingly knowing Natsume's troubles, he said softly, "It's like a dream. Like a bad dream repeating all over again." he said as he swirled his glass of ice in a clockwise manner. "But you know."

He stopped again, and Natsume turned to look at him questioningly. "I'm just so glad that Mikan is still here."

The sound of the blocks of ice gashing against the inner wall of the glass chimed across, and Natsume turned away to drink down another cup of the alcohol.

"Just one thing though Natsume. Don't make the same mistake again."

Ruka patted his back and left him alone to think. He knew his friend needed time, more than anyone does. But he is sure, and he trusts his only best friend to know what he should do next.

-

"Tell me Sakura Mikan. Who are your friends?"

"Hotaru. Ruka. Mitsume. Youichi. Aoi. Nobara. Tsubasa. Misaki. Narumi-sensei. And the list goes on."

"Aren't you forgetting someone?"

"His existence is erased from her memory. There is no way she can retrieve it."

"My, don't you have many friends. I meant, who are your REAL friends?"

"My real friends …"

"Remember your friends, Mikan."

It's that 'Mom' again! It's that girl and that boy.

"These corpses are of your so-called friends. They believed in you, and yet you killed and slaughtered every single one of them ruthlessly."

I looked around. True, there were corpses everywhere and almost every one of them was either brutally murdered or had undergone tremendous torture to death. But I don't recognize any one of them. I winced at the sight.

"Mikan. The boy there. He is Hyuga Natsume."

Hyuga Natsume.

SLASH

I see the Natsume-guy falling on the ground, his chest opened and blood spilled out profusely. Everything seemed to run in slow motion. He dropped on the wet land with a loud thud, his crimson eyes completely widened as blood spat out from his mouth. His whole body shook as blood continued flowing out of him like water. I turned to look at the girl. Her white dress was smeared with blotches of red liquid, and she was drenched in the rain. Her head was hung low as she walked towards the boy.

Standing up high above the fallen boy, I see the girl stabbing on Natsume's body like a puppet. Blood spilled out more and dirtied the girl's face. She looked up to wipe the blood the away, and what shocked me was that the girl has the exact same face with me!

She looked at the last person she murdered resentfully, her butterscotch eyes were cold and lifeless, and a wretched smile was stuck on her lips, as if she was enjoying the mass-murder.

I turned back to look at the boy, he was still alive, barely. The final word which escaped his mouth before his soul left his body was …

"NATSUME!"

Another nightmare. Much worse than the first. I struggled to catch my breath and my face is completely wet with cold sweat. I gulped my saliva down my dry throat, my body still recovering from the shock of the bad dream.

"Natsume …" I muttered softly.

GASP

Someone just hugged me!

The room was pitch black and I couldn't see a thing, nor the person who is hugging me now. Oh wait, I was blind, right? I tried to pry open the tight embrace but my efforts were in vain, the person was too strong. I tried to scream instead, but he or she outwitted me and closed my mouth before I could say anything coherent. My scream came out muffled and soft.

"Shhhh …" he hushed me. It was male. I knew he was trying to control the resisting me.

"Who are you?" I whispered between his struggling hand.

"It's Natsume. You called me right?"

My body immediately relaxed at the whisper of his name. Even I didn't know what happened.

"Promise me you won't scream."

I nodded meekly and he slowly removed his hand from my mouth and his arm from my waist.

Before he could say or do anything, my body reacted by itself and jumped into his arms again. I felt him stiffened, and was most probably surprised at my reaction.

All I knew was that I was crying and crying and crying on his chest and I kept muttering his name 'Natsume' again and again.

He, in return, relaxed and slowly reached his hand to stroke my hair as he gently said with his mellow voice, "Hush Mikan. Stop crying. Okay?" He hugged me tightly, as if he didn't want to ever let go again.

I swiveled and tried to remove myself from him. The part I cried on him was completely wet.

"I'm … I'm sorry."

WAIT. I could see? I'm not blind anymore?

"I can see." I whispered softly.

"Yeah. I think it was temporary, or maybe someone just did a spell on you or something, I don't know." He mused.

"Natsume." I started off seriously, though my eyes were still wet with tears. "I dreamt that I killed you."

I felt him stiffened as he kept quiet. "I didn't, right? I mean, you're here. So you must still be alive."

"Mikan."

My heart skipped a beat when he whispered my name. "Y-Yes?"

His arms reached out from the darkness and pulled me into another tight hug. I felt my head landing on the wet part of his shirt.

"I don't want to scare you." He paused. "But you did kill me."

That phrase seemed to echo across the whole room. It took me a while for it to sink in my mind. I gasped and tried to move away from the tight embrace, but he held me more, preventing me from moving at all.

"What … What did you say?" I stammered. My hands were already gripping his shirt, which is probably wrinkled by now. He placed his lips at my right ear, his hot breath fanning my neck.

"I said you murdered me. All of us."

未来のために ~ 第五章 ~ 終わり

Green button please? :)