Chapter 1: Then the news hits

I have to do this disclaimer because of copyright reasons, I do not want to be prosecuted by the BBC. So I decided to make it a little entertaining. Basically this is me in Sherwood Forest and meeting a few buddies, and a few enemies.

Me: Can I have Robin Hood?

anonymous voice (A/V): No!

Me: why not, I could do so much for this show!

A/V: Oh yeah, like what?

Me: Bring Marian back for starters! How could you do it BBC!?

A/V: Who's the BBC?

Me: You are, stupid!

A/V: No I'm not I'm Marian!

Me: WOW! You're supposed to be dead!

Marian: Many times over

Me: Wow great quote!

Marian: What did you want anyway, you strange person?

Me: I want Robin Hood.

Marian: What, my Robin!?

Me: Erm, I never thought of it like that! Marian, put the sword down!

Marian runs at me.

Me: Oh no! It's the Sheriff!

Marian: Where!

Me; (running away) ha ha, these fictional types are so easy to trick!

Marian: (Chasing me) Come back here you little runt!!

So I'm afraid I still don't own Robin Hood. Sos about that looooooooooong disclaimer! So I decided to do this to cure my writers block. Sos to all those people waiting for an update on my other stories. I am suffering from BAD writers block and a cold.

Hope you like this...

Once upon a time there was a beautiful girl, she lived in a Kingdom called Nottingham. The princess was called Marian.

She was living with her cruel Uncle, that she hated. Because her parents had perished.

Her handsome Prince Charming had gone bravely off to fight in the righteous war and the princess waited for him night and day...

Stop! Stop!

What's all this about waiting night and day? Please!

I am Marian, royal princess and rightfull heir to the throne. Hah! Like that's gonna happen any times soon. To become queen I have to marry and I have decided that men are a waste of space and taste.

Take Robin of Locksley, my Prince Charming, he ran off to war and cut off our engagement. Way to make a girl feel special! But he did knock sense into me, which is why, whenever my second charge, Guy of Gisbourne, approaches I don't reflect his 'feelings'. The thing about Guy is that he is my Uncle's son, so I can't exactly tell him to back off... I've decided that Guy reminds me of a spaniel. Always sniffing around me!

Fortunately, I found a cure, well, more a well, diversion. I am the Nightwatchman. Okay, this is going someplace safe. You see no-one is to know that I am the Nightwatchman. He, she, whatever, is a wanted criminal. See, I, as the Nightwatchman, give out food or money to he poor. So that means breaking into the Sheriff (my uncle's) bank account.

It's not like he needs it. I did it for a while and then he twigged that the Nightwatchman was taking for him and so... Well the next bit is simple really.

I must agree with the fairytale, my Uncle is amazingly cruel. I am quite fascinated by his icy heart. He hates me, but he needs a certain someone (that someone being Gisbourne) to be King and if I die some weird King on the other side of the world is next in line. So if he marries me he gets to be King and have, as I have heard the Sheriff call me, a 'pretty little leper to have his way with'. He disgusts me.

But he won't try anything until the Sheriff is ready to step down, no time soon then. I could always not marry him but there is an unspoken threat of what will happen if I do that.

So that's me, pretty tragic hey?

Here is my life.

Xxx

I sighed and put down my quill at the sound if a voice.

"Lady Marian!" It was Guy and he was outside my door, a regular stalking place.

"Just a minute!" I shoved my things away and hurried to the door, I had learnt that it was no good to keep Guy waiting.

"I do think that I should still be addressed as Your Majesty." I raised my eyebrows.

"No." He narrowed his eyes. "That's me."

"I am next in line." I pointed out.

"But my father is King." He said. "It seems we are both next in line. Maybe we could come to some sort of arrangement." He put his arm around me and I tried not to shudder. I detested the way that he looked at me, like some sort gravy covered morsel.

I pulled away. "Perhaps not."

He frowned.

"What did you need?" I asked, quickly.

"Oh I just wanted to tell you our outlaw has returned."

"Excuse me?"

"Robin of Locksley is home."

Xxx

"Robin?" I whispered.

"Yes Locksley." He frowned. "I know you were once engaged."

I turned away "He means nothing to me now." I said, hopefully with more conviction than I felt.

"But, once you were?" He persisted.

"Yes once upon a time we were."

"You still hold feelings?" It was more a statement than a question.

I took a deep breath and turned back to face him "That was along time ago. I was a child then."

"Good," he seemed to breath a sigh of relief also. "We will hang him after the council of nobles."

"Hang him!" I gasped.

"Yes, do you not remember his family?"

I nodded stiffly, I remembered the Locksley's. In fact Robin's sister, Elsie had been a good friend of mine. They had been hanged, for 'consorting with outlaws' just like the rest of the nobles loyal to my father and I. I choked back the lump in my throat.

"Anyway." Guy seemed unaware of my obvious distress. "The Sheriff wants you with us at the council of nobles."

"What?!" I gaped. They never let me come with them to the council.

"He wants you with us at the council." He repeated.

"I will change my dress." I said, still a little dazed.

"It is in a hour." Guy informed me. "Don't be late."

"Oh, I won't, now I need to change." Guy still hadn't moved. "Sir Guy." I said pointedly.

"Oh yes." He snapped out of his daydream and walked out of the room.

I sighed and slumped on the bed.

There you are, next chapter should be with it. I'm getting into this. And don't worry there is a plot. My mate Lucy who is reading this has just raised her eyebrows at this bit. Okay Luce, half a plot.