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Hidden Sentiments

Part IV: Breaking Dawn

Bella tugged gently at Renesmee's shirt, to straighten it as she said goodbye. "Have fun sweetie," she said to Renesmee.

"I will momma," Renesmee responded. Bye daddy! She waved to me through the window. I smiled and waved back.

She gave me one more brilliant smile and then ran to the edge of the woods, following Esme, Carlisle and Jacob. They were all hunting together.

Esme had asked for some time alone with Renesmee, without Rosalie and Jacob clamoring for her. Bella agreed, so Esme and Carlisle had decided to take Renesmee hunting. Jacob had thrown a fit at the prospect of going a day without her. Esme had eventually relented, and said he could go with them. Bella had talked to him before they left though, saying that Esme had rights too. She had basically ordered Jacob to let Esme and Nessie have some bonding time. He had readily agreed, knowing that he could be cut off from Renesmee for more than just a day if he made Bella too mad.

Seth, Leah, Quil and Embry were spending the day at La Push. Just having time with their friends and family was hard, now that they were bound to Jake. He had insisted that they go back today though. They had all agreed. Leah was probably the most enthusiastic. More about being away from us though, than spending time in La Push. I knew that she was still hurt very deeply by what had happened with Sam. Quil was happy as always to spend the day with Claire, but he already spent much more time in La Push than the rest of them. All because of her, of course. It would've killed him to be away from her for any length of time. Jacob understood and made a point of sending Quil back home often.

I smiled slightly to myself as I thought about where my brothers were. Alice and Rosalie had insisted on a couples' day, and were spending the day shopping. I gave a small chuckle, I was sure that Bella and I would be with them, if shopping was what Bella wanted to do. Thankfully, it wasn't. Not for Alice's lack of trying though.

Alice had put forth tremendous effort to convince Bella to spend the day with them. Even though Bella had vehemently and repeatedly refused, Alice hadn't given up; until Jasper smiled and gently pointed out the time. As a last resort, Alice had thrown Bella her best pitiful feel-sorry-for-me-and-please-do-what-I-want look. Bella had just shaken her head in exasperation and said, "Have fun guys."

Alice had reluctantly left, but not before Bella demanded that Alice not buy her too many things. Alice had agreed, but then made us promise that we'd come on the next couples' outing.

Replaying all of these events in my mind, I shook my head and smiled. I still stood, staring out the window and let loose a small chuckle. I heard the air whistle around me, and felt a familiar pair of arms wrap around my waist from behind.

"What are you chuckling about?" Bella asked as she pressed her face against my back.

I chuckled again, "I was remembering this morning, actually."

I could feel her smile through my shirt as she asked, "Which part are you referring to?" She gently squeezed.

I turned around to face her and wrapped my arms around her, then grinned. "All of it, of course. But I was mostly thinking about Alice's failed attempt at getting you to join her for the shopping-extravaganza-slash-couples'-outing."

Bella smiled again, giving a light chuckle. "I don't know if I'll ever understand her."

"Few of us do, but why in particular? Maybe I can help you."

Bella gave a slight laugh, "Why anyone would think that I'd rather go shopping in a group than spend the day with you alone is beyond me."

"Well, maybe she's hoping that with the prospect of eternity, you'll get sick of me." I said this with the most serious face and tone I could manage. Bella looked at me, her face incredulous. I could no longer hold in my laughter.

She looked at me, mock-disapproval on her face, and gently smacked my arm. Then she looked into my eyes more seriously, "Edward, even with eternity before us, I don't think there is any way that I will ever get sick of being with you."

I stared back into her eyes, noticing the smallest fleck of orange in the center. "And I know, that even if I could live through eternity twice, I would never tire of your company." I pulled her even closer, and murmured into her hair, "And that is the absolute truth, I promise."

We were silent for a moment, then I heard Bella emit a small sigh. "What?" I asked her.

She shifted away slightly, so she could look at me again. I was worried for a moment, but she had a small smile upon her face. "It's nothing."

I gave her a look that clearly communicated that I knew better. She smiled wider, and twined her right hand with my left and spoke, "You always say the most romantic things. I admit, there have been a couple corny ones, but I know that even those, you mean with all your heart. Whenever you say things like that, I know that you mean them, and that they come from the depths of your soul. And that is one thing that makes them mean so much to me. They come from your soul. Even you cannot deny that. And the fact that you actually mean them when you say them to me... it takes my unnecessary breath away."

I ran my free hand through her hair gently, "I truly do mean what I say, yet even the most complex and lengthy speech could not come close to adequately portraying even a fraction of what I actually feel and think."

She leaned up towards me, and placed a delicate kiss on my cheek. "And that, Mr. Cullen," she whispered softly into my ear, "is what makes me fall in love with you again each day."

I gave her my best smile and then quietly asked her, "So, what were those grand plans you spoke of earlier?"

She grinned back, and spoke quickly as she tugged me gently up the stairs. "We, my dear husband, are going to have an old-fashioned, human-paced moving day."

"Moving day, huh?" I asked.

Bella continued tugging, "Well, more of a partial transfer of select items than an actual move."

"Ah, I see. What items are we selecting and transferring?"

She stopped and gave me slightly admonishing look, "Don't tease Edward, you might regret it later."

I did my best to look abashed, "Sorry, love."

She rolled her eyes in good humor, and answered my question as she started up the stairs again, "I thought that we could go through your room and see if there's anything that you want over in our house." I smiled, she had absolutely glowed as she had said "our house."

We reached the top of the stairs, and I pulled her to my side and answered, "Sounds good to me."

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We had started with my music. We had finally reached the halfway point, and the large stacks of CDs, eight-tracks and records were proof of our progress. I smiled and then turned to my wife, "I think we need to clear some floor space, Bella. We're running out of surface area to sort on."

"Yeah... There are a few boxes somewhere downstairs, can you go look for them? No cheating, human speed, remember." She gave me a teasing grin.

I was the one to roll my eyes this time, "Of course Bella. What are you going to do while I'm on the hunt for cardboard?"

"I think I'm going to start clearing out your closet."

"My closet, huh?" Why would she want to clear out my closet?

She gave me another grin. "I'm getting a bit tired of looking at CD cases. And I want to pick out a few things to take over to the house."

I gave her another smile, "Whatever you want. Just be sure to leave some relatively comfortable outfits here."

She leaned over, a teasing grin lighting up her face. She reached out and gently brushed her fingers across my cheek as she spoke, "What I want is to finish at a relatively fast human pace so that we can have some more alone time. Time where we can do more than transfer."

My smile grew, and I gave a small chuckle at her comment, "Your want is my command." I touched her cheek in return and then headed downstairs at a - reluctant - human pace.

I began searching for the boxes that Bella had spoken of, and listened to her as I went. She was humming softly to herself as she dug through my closet. After searching for a bit, I found a couple of boxes. I grasped them and went back upstairs.

I re-entered my room, speaking to Bella already, "I found a couple of the boxes. I don't know if they'll hold everything, but it's a start."

As I started packing the music, I could hear the smile in her voice as she replied, "Well, I can always send you on another hunt later."

I chuckled, "I suppose you could. How are you doing in there?"

"Well, contrary to what I thought upon my entry, your closet does seem to actually have a back wall. And I've almost managed to reach it."

I grinned, even though she couldn't see me, "I'm surprised. Even I haven't seen the back of my closet for a year or more. Alice always rearranges whenever she feels the family needs to update their style."

Bella was the one to chuckle this time, "Alice will be Alice. How long did it take you to realize that your closet was no longer your own after she joined the family?"

I gave another light-hearted laugh, "Only a couple of months. I think she convinced everyone else before me, though."

Bella continued rifling through the closet as she responded, lightness still coloring her tone, "Stubborn Edward. Stuck in your habits and..." Her voice trailed off.

I heard a small rustle of what sounded like paper, then silence. I pushed back the illogical bit of worry that was building up, "Bella, is anything wrong?" The worry slightly crept it's way into my voice, but I stayed put as I asked again, "Bella?"

"Uh," She seemed to be pulling herself out of deep thought. "Nothing Edward, hold on a second."

I heard more faint rustles, then her footsteps as she slowly walked back toward the front of the closet. When she appeared, I smiled and asked her, "What took you so long? Did Alice put so many clothes in there that you got lost?" I almost began to chuckle, but the sound died on my lips as I took in the look that was on Bella's face. Serious, and something else I couldn't identify.

She held up a piece of paper, folded multiple times, "What is this Edward?"

I gave her a puzzled look, "I don't know. Where did you find it?"

A hint of suspicion blossomed on her face, "It was wedged into a crack on the back wall of your closet, I think. I'm pretty sure that I knocked it loose with all of my shuffling around."

Oh.

Memories from more than a year and a half ago pushed themselves to the forefront of my mind. "Oh." I reiterated. Aloud, this time, looking down. I had forgotten about that. I had never planned on her seeing that. I was feeling a bit embarrassed. Mostly because she had found it in such a manner, but also because I was a bit nervous about what she would think.

"Oh?" She questioned.

I didn't answer, so she pressed further, "Edward, what is it?"

I was silent for a moment, then mumbled, "It's something that I wrote a long time ago." The volume of my voice would have been more than inaudible to her just a month ago, but now Bella had better-than-perfect hearing, and caught every word.

"Is it a song?" She sounded almost confused as she continued to probe for answers.

I debated quickly in my head, then gave a small, resigned sigh. I suppose I'll just have to see what she thinks. Or at least see what she tells me she's thinking. "You can just read it, Bella."

Now she looked at me, slightly abashed, "I already did."

I looked into her eyes now, "Really?" Nervousness colored my tone.

She gave me a questioning glance, "Why are you nervous, Edward?"

I glaced away from her face again, and spoke quietly. "I suppose I'm worried that you didn't like it."

Bella gave me an incredulous look. "Edward, you can't be serious."

I looked back at her sheepishly, "It's just a poem, Bella."

Her face broke into a smile, shining with unadulterated love. "Edward, how could I not like it?" Her smile softened, "First of all you wrote it, and that's plenty right there. But what you say as well; it touches my soul, Edward. It's everything from back then all summed up, isn't it?"

I felt relief and gratitude at her response. "Not all, but a crucial part of it, yes. There was no way to put down all my feelings. You understand now how impossible that would be."

"I do indeed," she said with a slight chuckle. Curiosity colored her tone as she asked, "When exactly did you write this?"

I down, the embarrassment managing to slightly rekindle itself. "That first night that you knew I stayed. After our day in the meadow." Then I looked at her again.

It was silent for a moment. Then she smiled again, "I thought that you had just gone home to shower that night."

"Well, that's technically what I did. I wrote the poem in your room, after you had stopped talking - for the most part. I came back here with the ulterior motive of hiding that from sight."

"But why?" Bella was clearly puzzled about my reason for wanting to hide the poem.

"Well, my greatest desire was to have it printed or something similar, and make a big deal of it. But for many obvious reasons that would've been too compromising. I also knew that you probably wouldn't like all of the attention that it would garner. Selfishly, I also didn't want to be teased about it by my family. That's why I made sure that they were all otherwise occupied when I hid it." I grinned at her again.

"You most certainly made the right decision. You knew me better than you thought, even back then."

"Maybe not so well, if I was afraid that you wouldn't like it" I said, still smiling.

Bella smiled back. "Silly vampire, how could I not like anything that you wrote for me? Especially something as beautiful as this?" Bella paused her speech, and stepped closer to me, putting one of her hands on my chest. She looked up at my eyes as she continued, "Edward, this truly is beautiful. - And even if I didn't like it, I don't love you for what you write for me, buy for me, or even what you cooked for me. I love you because you are you."

Her face became absolutely serious as she continued "You're an incredible man who is kind, caring, understanding, accepting, forgiving, easy to love, and now - an amazing father. That is why I love you Edward. Your talents are just an added plus."

The entire time she spoke, I had fallen deeper into her eyes, losing myself. I still didn't know what twist of fate had brought us together, but I would be eternally grateful to whatever or whoever had orchestrated it. I simply could not imagine my life without Bella in it. And to think that I had ever had the arrogance to think that I could leave her. That it was the 'right' thing to do... I would still never forgive myself. Never, even though we had forever.

Forever, hmm. That thought gave me an incredible burst of happiness, and it manifested in a new grin upon my face.

Bella noticed, and asked, "What? Why are you grinning?"

I looked down at her, and wrapped my arms around her now, keeping her one hand trapped between us. "I was reflecting upon the thought that we have the rest of forever to spend together."

The soft smile returned to her face, her eyes still shining, "That would be something to grin about, wouldn't it?"

"Yes, indeed. I am more than delighted that you liked the poem, Bella-"

She softly interrupted me, "Loved. I loved the poem."

I held her tighter to my chest as I continued. "Of course, but I still love you more than words can express. It is a very good thing that we have forever because that might be how long it takes me to find an adjective or expression that could adequately convey how I see you and feel about you." I released her a bit, so that I could look into her face, and she stopped breathing. I leaned down, exhaling gently onto her face as I continued. "You are mine forever Bella Cullen, and I will love you for eternity and beyond."

She started to breathe again, but no words emerged. She just nodded her head. Bella's expression was unfathomable as she took her arm out from between us, and twined both of her hands around my neck. I pulled her face up to my lips, and before they met, I heard a small rustle as a piece of paper fell to the floor.

Then our lips meshed, and I mumbled, "Forever."

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- Author's Note: (Updated - Feb. 2010)

Hey to all my readers! This is the new and improved (reedited and checked for canon-compliance - if you find anything out of place, please let me know!) part IV of Hidden Sentiments. I hope you are happy with the final product, and enjoyed the whole story. I love constructive criticism, so don't be afraid to be a harsh (but correct) critic/reviewer.

*****Previous readers: Thanks for coming by and reading this again, my thanks are bountiful!

*****All readers: If you haven't already, I'd love it if you dropped me a review; and be sure to check out my companion pieces for Hidden Sentiments: "Hunting," "Anxiety," and "Revealed Affection."

P.S. - For any of you who want to read Edward's poem, it's included in "Revealed Affection."

Chapter info notes:
This part takes place in BD, obviously; But it is during the three months of happiness (mentioned in the beinning of chapter 27, Travel Plans). S.M. provided no scenes or dialogue, so it's all from my imagination. A chapter from scratch, if you will. I am hoping that I did an all-right job of keeping the characters relatively true to how they are portrayed in the books.

~Thanks go to my God, and everyone who has favorited, reviewed, or subscribed to this story!