"State the obvious"

Synopsis: Can House ever really get bored with girl-on-girl-on-girl action?

Warning: Rated M for smut, language, and femslash (Cameron, Cuddy, and Thirteen- sort of) No spoilers, no respect for the House timeline

Disclaimer: I don't own House, but I put his ladies on my Christmas list

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Cuddy left her office and let herself into the little office next door. Cameron and Thirteen sat on the couch and waited for her to speak.

"He thinks that he is winning. I just stormed out of my office, apparently furious, to find the two of you." She smiled even as Cameron and Thirteen laughed quietly.

"On to phase two?"

"Oh yeah."

......................

House sat on his couch, having a few fingers of Jameson's, and feeling victorious. Watching Thirteen's forlorn face and Cameron's worried expression were nice but Cuddy's blind rage had pleased him enormously. Usually Cuddy was a pretty tough nut to crack but her newfound lesbian circumstance had softened her. House smiled a bit at the wounded look that House had caught Cuddy giving Thirteen's back when she thought no one was looking.

He looked down at his coffee table and the spread of photos before him. His groin tightened and he quickly glanced toward his windows as if expecting his boss and her girlfriends to be peering back at him. He briefly thought about whether he should do what he was about to do. Of course I am gonna do this. He reached for his belt and undid it. His fingers unbuttoned his pants and began to slide down his zipper but paused at the buzz of his doorbell.

Shit.

House grabbed the pictures and quickly stuffed them under his sofa. He grabbed his cane and limped towards the door even as it buzzed again. He remembered his unzipped pants as he open the door but his visitors made him forget again.

Two brunettes and a blond stood there with inquisitive expressions.

"Dr. Gregory House?"

He nodded mutely and the blond handed him an envelope. He opened the envelope and read in Cuddy's flowery handwriting.

Merry Christmas. Look, but don't touch. Enjoy it, House. This is as close as you are ever going to get.

House was thrown, but when the women pushed him inside- he was only a little confused. He was pulled toward his sofa and pushed onto the cushions. Even as he settled himself, House wondered at Cuddy's actions. Did she honestly think that sending him hookers would get him to stop teasing her and her underlings? House scoffed at the idea even as the blonde next to him poked him in the ribs.

"Pay attention."

House refocused himself and tried to follow the scene unfolding before him. His television was off now and the brunettes stood in front of it, kissing. He popped two Vicodin and let the blonde cuddle against his side. His lips parted to ask when she was going to join in but her hand stroking his good thigh stopped him. He guessed that Cuddy's rule of no touching only applied to him.

He watched the darker haired brunette nibble her way down the other girl's neck. Her hair was pushed aside and her skin was bitten and sucked between eager lips. Hands slid down and grasped clothes, revealing bras then breasts. Each woman took her turn on the other's breasts. The women pressed against each other and continued to devour. Hands and teeth and tongues traveled in every direction and vacationed in every location. House delighted in the women's obvious devotion to the job they were hired for.

He was distracted again by the little blond's hand easing into the front of his pants. He grit his teeth as the feel of her small hand expertly stroking him and wished for her mouth next. House looked back towards the brunettes, who were now completely naked and moaning. One woman forced the other to the floor then climbed atop her. She continued to kiss and lick her way down the other girl's body as she dipped her fingers into her. She lowered her mouth down to the prone girl's center and slipped her tongue inside. She rocked her face between the older woman's thighs and pressed another finger deep within her.

House leaned forward to see his paid company better but turned a bit so that the blond could continue stroking him. He noticed that one of the brunettes had a 13 tattooed across her the small of her back. He smiled at the strange coincidence. However, he was more interested in her tight ass than in reading her tramp stamp. The moans and groans that filled his apartment, along with the blond's quickening wrist, spurred on his impending orgasm.

He began to thrust into her hand, still staring at the fucking hookers on his floor. He felt himself spurt through the girl's fingers while the bottom brunette gasped out her orgasm and collapsed. The blond was polite enough to let him finish in her hand before she released him to join the women of the floor. She stripped off her blouse and crawled off the couch. Her movements forced House's eyes to follow her and to notice that she also had a tattoo across her back.

House leaned forward to read it.

Cameron

House leaned back to ponder at Cuddy's ingenuity.

She really is evil.