Disclaimer:

I do not own Harry Potter, I do not own Kim Possible, and I do not have any permission what-so-ever to use them. Harry belongs to the lovely J.K. Rowling, and all the book publishers (Bloomsbury and Scholastic Press) and move moguls (Time Warner Studios) involved. Kimmie belongs to Disney.

Chapter Four:

Harry Situation

Kim and Ron sneaked, once again, into the current hideout of her arch-foe, Dr. Draken, hidden on some foggy island in the North Sea by the Hebrides. They were on a mission to see what shenanigans he was up to now. All they knew was he purchased a hundred Doctor Spock books, crates of baby toys, and who knew what nefarious purpose he was going to put them to use for.

Silently rappelling from high duct-work, Kim spied her target hunched over a laptop, clicking away at the keys. That was when Ron went falling and screaming by, tangled in his rope. The element of surprise was lost. "Ron!" she complained.

Dr. Draken immediately closed his laptop as he spun around, computer in hand. "Kim Possible! And her sidekick … uh …"

"Say my name," Ron yelled from where he was dangling in mid-air.

"Buffoon!"

Kim dropped cat like to the floor. "What ever it is you are up to, I am putting a stop to it."

"She-Go!" Draken hollered for his sidekick.

The green-clad bruiser came bounding in. "What is it, I was in the middle of … Kimmie," she growled the last part as she caught sight of her nemesis. With an inarticulate roar she launched herself at the young hero.

Draken, meanwhile, dodged for the door. "Looks like it is time to … Runaway!"

"K.P., Dr. D. is getting away!" Ron called from where he was tied up. Rufus, meanwhile was busy gnawing at the rope binding him. However, Draken had already fled through the door.

"A little busy here, Ron," Kim called as she duck a hook and went to leg sweep She-Go, who had back flipped out of the way. Kim then had to dodge and roll as She-Go threw her green colored blasts.

Ron screamed as suddenly he found himself free and falling fast to the floor. "Oomph. I'll go find -" but he never finished as the roof blew off .

"She-Go," Dr. Draken yelled as he lowered a rope ladder from his flying contraption. "Come on, we're leaving."

Without even a glance at Kim, She-Go quickly made her way to the pilot seat and the two blasted off.

"Well, that went easier than normal," Ron remarked.

Kim shrugged. "Was it me, or did She-Go fight extra ferocious or something … like, she was … I don't know, protecting something?"

"I think you're reading too much into this, K.P. Clearly we caught them unaware and they weren't ready to deal with the awesomeness that is Ron Possible and his sidekick."

Kim gave Ron a flat stare. "He doesn't even know your name."

"Technicalities. He clearly fears me."

"Whatever. Let's look for clues." She pulled out her Kimunicator. "Hey, Wade. Get ready to analyze some data. I want to know what he was up to."

Somewhere, in another secret lair, Dr. Draken was bent over one of the most important tasks he has ever attempted. "Wait, where does this tab go? Why are there so many tabs?!" He raised his arms to the heavens as he railed, clothespin stuck firmly to his nose.

"You changed that diaper yet or what? His dinner is growing cold." She-Go grouched from the next room over.

"You think there would be an instruction manual or something," Draken groused.

She-Go came into the room, rolling her eyes. "There is. You didn't want to read it so you gave them to the henches."

"Fabulous idea. I'll have the henches do this." Draken pushed a button on a remote and half a dozen of his minions came running in prepared for diaper-duty. They had gas-masks, rubber gloves, and hazmat aprons on while one carried a bomb-disposal box and another a three foot long pair of tongs. "Clean up this mess and prepare him for dinner."

At She-Go's stare, he corrected himself. "I don't mean prepare him for our dinner, I mean prepare him to eat his own dinner." He then muttered to himself as he stormed from the room. "Sheesh, it's not like we're cannibals or nothing."

She-Go followed him out. "What are we going to do about Kim Possible? You know she's going to drop in sooner or later."

Draken shrugged. "What do you want me to do? Just build some random device for her buffoon to destroy so they can think they stopped whatever evil scheme I am cooking up and not look any deeper to find out our secrets?"

She-Go glared. "That's exactly what I want you to do. Now get to it."

"Fine, fine. You're such a taskmaster. How about I build a ray that-"

She-Go cut him off. "I don't care what it does, just make it."

A week later, Kim came crashing into a room finding Draken fiddling with a machine. "Kim Possible," Dr. Draken greeted. "How I have been expecting you. Though, I was expecting you three days ago. Do you know how rude it is to keep people waiting?"

"Whatever. I'm going to put a kibosh on your newest plan for world domination." Kim sized up the large and strange construct in the middle of the room. While she was looking it over, Draken pushed a button and some henchmen came running in. A couple in gas masks and hazmat aprons, which did not go unnoticed. "Where's She-Go?"

"Oh, you know women. She said something about a Spa day or something. I wasn't really listening. Yap yap yap, manicure. Yap yap yap, mud facial. It was really boring." Then Draken pulled a giant red lever on his machine. "Ha ha ha, behold the glory of my latest invention."

A whining sound started to build up and the machine slowly shook. "It just needs a few minutes to warm up first."

"Ron, you take out that contraption. I'll get Draken."

"On it K.P."

Draken pulled at his hair. "What are you guys waiting for? Get them!"

Without She-Go, the battle was short and one-sided and soon Ron was tripping into a console that set off a self-destruct sequence.

"Darn you, Kim Possible. I'll get you next time!" Draken then managed another last minute escape as the lair began to shake and shiver.

Kim whipped out her Kimunicator and took some quick scans and photos for Wade to analyze. "Come on Ron, time to go. We have an exam in history tomorrow to study for."

Later that night, Kim was getting a report from Wade. "Any idea what that machine would have done."

"From near I can tell," Wade paused to sip from a large coke and type on some keys, "it processes dirty diapers."

Kim's eyes narrowed. "Oh? Into what? A nitrogen based bomb? Collecting the scent to make a city wide stench bomb? Maybe a plan to make zombie, robot babies?"

"None of those. It just makes compost out of dirty diapers."

"That makes no sense. What use would Draken have with compost?"

Ron leaned in from where he was pretending to study history. "Maybe he wants to win a 'Best Block Garden' award?"

"Whatever he's up to, I am sure we'll hear more about it soon enough."

Kim did not expect to see what she saw as she dropped in, figuratively, on Draken by way of his sewers. Draken and She-Go, both covered in food splotches, were trying to feed a small toddler.

"Come on, open the garage for the submarine. Look, it's a submarine. Pew pew pew pew pew." Draken zig-zagged a spoon of mashed beets towards the boy's mouth. The boy was stubborn and shook his head no.

"What the hello is going on here?" Kim exclaimed as Ron tumbled out of a floor grate behind her.

Draken and She-Go spun around. "Kim Possible! And that tag-along."

"Ron Stoppable," Ron groaned.

"What are you doing to that baby?" Kim accosted.

Draken suddenly was on his knees in front of her, hands clasped. "You're a babysitter. Oh please you got to make him eat. He's being difficult because we left his favorite spoon back at the last lair."

"You – uh – I – What? Where did you get that baby?"

Dr. Draken had begun to say 'England' but only got to say 'En' as She-Go leaped at Kim with a growl. "I ain't letting miss goody two shoes here near him. Now scram, you ain't wanted here."

The two grappled, and while they fought, Ron went to play with the baby. He tickled it on the chin and soon got it to laugh, followed immediately by stuffing a spoon into his mouth.

"Buffoon, you're a life-saver," Draken dramatically commented. Ron rolled his eyes.

Kim had the upper hand and was about to spin kick She-Go when a strange burst of multi-colored smoke erupted in between them, sending Kim to land on her rear. She-Go was about to capitalize on her new advantage when Draken called for her from his escape pod. "Next time, Kimmie-Cakes."

After they left, Ron helped Kim to her feet. "You know," he told her, "I think their kid made that smoke."

"Don't be ridiculous, Ron. How did he do it? Magic? And Dr. Draken said they they got the baby 'in' something. Did they find him in a box? In a dumpster? It's a mystery and we're going to solve it!"

hr

This went on for some time, Kim would sometimes drop in on the two in the middle of some evil scheme, and sometimes in the middle of a domestic scene. Like currently, when her and Ron dropped in to find all the Henches with their mouths duct taped shut and Draken rocking the boy to sleep.

"Kim Possible!" he whispered. "Can we reschedule for in an hour or two? I'm kind of tied up at the moment."

Kim merely rolled her eyes and pulled out a book to read in the meantime.

The boy, who Kim had already learned was named Harry, was a lively five year old as Kim, Draken, and She-Go teamed up to stop the aliens menacing their planet.

Being lauded as heroes, after helping to resist the enemy which Ron utterly defeated, Draken and She-Go turned over a new leaf. Which lead to the current meeting at a Bueno Nacho. She-Go had pulled Kim aside as Draken gave a weird stare to Ron.

"What, do I have El Diablo sauce on my chin?"

"There is something I been meaning to ask," Draken said as he looked uncomfortable.

"Don't worry. I get it all the time."

Draken looked at the young man curiously. "You do?"

Ron nodded. "Yeah, how do I keep such a great bod when I eat Bueno Nacho all day long?"

"That wasn't it," Draken growled.

"Oh?"

"Willyoubemybestman," he rushed out.

Ron tried to piece out what Draken had slurred together. "Did you just ask me to … be your best friend? I'm flattered and all, but that position is already filled."

Draken smacked himself in the face. "I said best man, not best friend."

Ron looked at Draken suspiciously. "Are you coming on to me, because I have a girlfriend so that position is already full too."

Whatever Draken was going to angrily retort went unsaid as the two heard a loud squeal from nearby. Looking over showed Kim hugging She-Go and dragging her over. "Ron, guess who asked me to be her maid of honor?"

"Is Bonnie marrying Senior Senior Junior? Because I think they should give it another two years, first."

Draken ground his teeth. "No you brain-dead buffoon. I'm marrying She-Go. Are you going to be my best man or not?"

"Huh? Oh! Yeah, I would be honored. Yep, me, Ron Stoppable. Bestest best man ever."

"Now that's out of the way, we can do the most difficult question," She-Go said in relief.

"Oh?" Kim pursed her lips in thought.

She-Go nodded. "Asking my brother to give me away."

Harry was playing quietly in the family 'wreck' room, building a toy doomsday device from LEGOs and aluminum foil, as his parents were getting dressed. The doorbell rang.

"Harry, honey. Can you get that, please? It's probably Kimmie-cakes."

"Aunt Kimmie!" Harry cried in excitement as he ran to the door. Checking the surveillance monitor, he saw both Kim and Ron. "And Uncle Ron!" He opened the door. "Hey guys!"

"Hey there, Harry," the two greeted as they came in.

"Tell me more stories, Uncle Ron," Harry demanded as he hug Ron by the legs.

Ron looked into the wreck-room and saw Harry was playing with LEGOs. "What you building?"

"It's a Doom-Ray-Inator! When I am done with it, it'll cause fear to quake in the hearts of my toy soldiers."

"Cool beans!"

Draken came into the room just then, dressed in a nice suit. "Why does everything always end in an '-inator' with you? I swear, you must get that from your mother's side."

"I heard that," She-Go called from another room.

"So, Kim Possible, we meet again." Draken bowed to the young woman.

Kim giggled. "Dr. Draken. For a change of pace, tonight, I shall help you accomplish your goal … of a date night with your lovely wife."

"I still can't believe babysitting is still on the list of services you render. Mixed in there with stopping international crime, world saving, and solving mysteries."

Kim blushed. "Babysitting is only available to a select, few individuals, of course. Otherwise, it would take up too much time."

"Who wouldn't want K.P. to watch their kids. It's probably the safest hands they could be in. Unless Warmonger comes gunning for her again, or one of the other usual crew of nutballs."

"Well the usual crew of nutballs better be taking a night off," She-Go retorted as she entered the room, wearing a sexy and expensive looking dress. "The last time we let Harry anywhere near Killian McDuff, he wanted to wear a kilt for a week."

"Wow, hot mama! Awwooo," Kim elbowed She-Go. "Looking good there."

She-Go blushed. "Aww, this old thing?"

"Old thing? You spent six hours this past weekend picking it out." Draken got elbowed in the ribs by She-Go. "Oof. I mean, you look as lovely as ever my little, terrifying mistress of evil."

"So, what do you guys got planned for the night? Dinner? Movies? Invading a small, third world nation to corner the market on pickled oysters?" Ron speculatively eyed the pair.

Draken rolled his eyes. "Invasion? On my teacher's salary? Puh-leez! Just a quiet carriage ride, that I built out of left over jet parts from my younger and wilder days, dinner in a drab, Lowerton diner, and who knows where the night might lead us after that."

"Younger, wilder days? That was, like, three years ago," Ron huffed.

"To-may-toe, po-tay-toe. Let's just agree to disagree as long as you agree with me."

Ron crossed his arms. "Nuh-uh. I saw what you did there."

"Boys, break it up. Come on, you two have to get going. And She-Go, I want all the details tomorrow." Kim escorted the married couple to their door.

"Wait, all the details?" Draken gulped nervously.

"Thanks again, Kimmie!" She-Go said over her shoulders as she dragged Draken away.

"Hey, any time you guys."

Kim closed the door and spun to find Ron and Harry were deep in making the LEGO doomsday device. "Hey Ron. Think you should bring Hana over to play too?"

As Harry turned eleven, he was excited for his birthday party. His father, a professor at Upperton University, and mother had took a summer off from work so they could travel the world, recounting their many adventures. It wasn't well known, to anyone but Draken and She-Go, that the day they celebrated his birthday on was picked out of a hat. They had a rough age to go by, when they found him, and knew he was a summer baby. They had chosen, blindly from the hat, a date in the middle of July. So they had plan to be in England mid-July, so they could celebrate in the same country they had found him in.

"I am pretty sure we were south of London that night, She-Go."

She-Go gave an exasperated sigh. "Like you could ever read a map properly."

While his parents jabbered about some nonsense or other, Harry hadn't paid them much attention. He was busy texting Auntie Kimmie, trying to wheedle out of her what his present was going to be. He couldn't wait to see Aunt Kim and Uncle Ron at his birthday party.

'Uncle Ed said he was going to give me a large block hemi. I'm not exactly sure what that is' he typed into his smartphone.

So, while the two grown-ups were bent over a map, trying to plan their day, and while Harry was bent over his phone, texting friends, an owl flew into the room and hooted.

"Ah!" Draken screamed and turned around. "Kim Po- I mean – Look, an owl. She-Go, kill it for me."

She-Go rolled her eyes. "First spiders and now owls. What's next, gonna want me to kill your shadow?"

"I think," Harry said has he pointed to the leg of the bird, "that he has a message. Who do we know that uses birds as messengers?"

"I still don't know She-Go. This whole Warthog thing sounds fishy to me. Or would that be piggy?"

She-Go rolled her eyes. "We sent the letter to Global Justice and they confirmed it was legit. We'll just have to wait for the representative to show up and then we can ask some questions."

"I would just feel better," Draken replied, "if we had a bit more back-up, in case things go south fast. Like a few dozen henches, a death ray or two, even just an escape vehicle that isn't a twenty year old jalopy we rented just to tour this awful island. I mean, what kind of island is England anyways? It doesn't have any active volcanoes, no automated defense system, why it even lacks an unwelcome mat or two."

"Well, I called Kim and she's enroute with Ron. Probably come parachuting in any minute now."

Harry nodded. "I bet Ron will have lost his pants, again."

She-Go snickered. "That's a chump bet."

As it so happened, the next moment had Kim gracefully landing on the balcony to the hotel room as Ron plummeted into a pants-less heap next to her at the exact same time as a knock to the door.

"Perfect timing, as always. Time to tell this charlatan that no son of mine will be learning mystical mumbo-jumbo when there's perfectly good science to be had." Draken pointed his finger up to emphasize his point.

"Shut up dear. I want to see what they have to say." She-Go glared at her husband.

There was another polite knock on the door.

"And if you don't like what you hear?" Draken glared back at his wife.

The knocking turned impatient.

"Then I'll level the school and leave no brick upon another."

Harry rolled his eyes. "I'll get it." He opened the door. On the other side was an old, matronly lady who looked very prim and proper. "How can I help you, ma'am?"

The lady looked spooked to see Harry standing there. "Spitting image of your father," she whispered.

"Hardly, what with his blue skin and all."

"Huh?" McGonagall was confused by Harry's statement.

"Won't you come in, ma'am." Harry stepped aside to allow her entry.

Harry sighed as he pushed a cart loaded with his school supplies. His family was with him, though it was a shock to learn he was adopted. 'No, more like abducted. Seeing as I wasn't even legally adopted to begin with. To be fair, though, Dad always had a bit of a problem with doing things the legal way.'

Kim and Ron were there too. They wore casual clothes, but the way they kept eyeing their surroundings and everyone in it, Harry knew they were in full-on mission mode. 'How is me taking a train to school even a Global Justice or Team Possible worthy mission? Sure, that McGonagall chick seemed mighty upset, turns out every magical citizen of Britain has been looking for me for years. Though she did imply she thought my real relatives were a horrible bunch and I was probably lucky to be taken away from them. But I don't think they'll just kidnap me back … right?'

The good-byes was a tearful affair, and then Harry was being whisked away on an old steamer style train. She-Go, Draken, Ron, and Kim were still watching it as it disappeared into the distance when a couple strangers in black robes came up behind them.

"Hello. I'm Jason and this is my partner, Casey. If you'll all look at these sticks for a moment … obliviate You never had a son named Harry Potter. And you have no interest in staying in London any longer."

Three of the four looked at each other and shrugged; Draken stood there looking dazed and confused. A strong wind suddenly whipped around, playing with the hems of cloaks, robes, dresses, and shirts of all who were still on the platform. A bunch of ropes dropped down from a hovering Global Justice jump-jet to hang in front of the four Americans.

Kim grabbed her rope. "Come on Ron, we better go report the illegal mind attack to Director Director."

"Right behind you K.P."

She-Go grabbed her rope and was being pulled up. She snagged Draken as he was still slow on the uptake. "Huh, what? Where are we and what are we doing here?"

She-Go rolled her eyes. "Thanks a bunch," she called down to the two. "But after all the other things I been exposed to, your little light show was ineffective. Be back in the spring for my son." And if her hands weren't full with rope and Draken, she'd leave a little parting gift in the form of exploding plasma.

"She-Go, I demand you tell me what's going on here. When did you have a son? And why does Kim Possible look all grown up?"

Harry sat on the stool as an old hat was placed on his head.

"Hmm. You are smart. Ambitious too. You tend to play cavalierly with the rules, but are loyal to your family and few friends. All the result of your rather unorthodox upbringing, but that is neither here nor there. You'd do well in any house, but where to sort you?"

Harry shrugged. "I don't really know myself."

"In that case, it better be ..."

Yep, that's how it ends. Ain't I a stinker?