A/N - Thank you for the reviews!! Sorry I didn't reply to any reviews for this story, I just don't have much time. You would rather I spend what free time I do have writing right? Lol. Anyway, so I was a little uncertain about how I was going to write this last chapter, but once I actually started writing it, I fell in love with it. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. :D

p.s. I was on youtube the other day and I was listening to I Can't Live a Lie by Carrie Underwood and I realized how perfectly it fit this story. I was going to try to incorporate it into this chapter, but it didn't work out. Still, go listen to it, it's a great song! :)

Disclaimer - I don't own Twilight

Calls for Christmas

Chapter Four

One Year Later/Christmas Eve

I had cut down a live tree this year, so that if Edward asked I could tell him. I doubted I could stand that bitter sorrow he had expressed last year a second time. I needed him to be happy, because his happiness constituted my own joy. It was almost ironic how he could still influence me from the other side of the country. New York City seemed a world away from my own tiny residence in Forks, but he still seemed capable of reaching out across space and time to pull at the strings of my heart.

"Edward," I whimpered sadly without bothering to stop the onslaught of pain that enveloped me. I had given myself up to the misery this year. A small part of me rationalized that it was still only on Christmas Eve, but in reality I simply didn't care anymore. My yearning for Edward had become an unbearable, physical ache, and after a year of shoving it down, I had to give myself up to the agony.

I shivered from my spot on the sofa and curled my body closer in on itself. It was below zero degrees outside and my heater was broken. Presently I was wrapped up in two thick afghans, but even they didn't suffice. To add to my oh so joyous night, I'd angrily slammed my fist into the wall next to the thermostat when I made the unfortunate 'no heat' discovery. Now my fingers were bruised and aching.

All it did was tear my heart up a little more as I imagined Edward's amused chuckle if he'd seen me do it.

Is this what it had come to then? My pathetic excuse for a life centered around a single day of the year, and I clung to the hope of Edward's voice with boundless anticipation, bordering on obsession. I knew it was dangerous, but I couldn't bring myself to let go of the last small part of him that belonged to me.

I began to meander reverently through the copy of Romeo and Juliet in my lap, careful not to twist my bruised fist. It had a worn cover and several pages were doggy-eared; it was well loved. I slowly opened to the very first page in the book, knowing exactly what I would find. Brushing my eyelids to prevent tears, I read the inscription:

To My Angel,

Bella

The light of my life

The reason for my existence

I would die without you, my love

Happy Anniversary,

Edward

I released a strangled sob. I treasured those words with all my heart. I kept the book locked safely in a case beneath a mound of underwear in my dresser. Sometimes, when I was weary and grief-ridden and wanted to escape from the dreary, monotonous pattern that I called my life, I would slip it from its hiding place. I would stare at Edward's words like they were a promise of some hidden secret, a happy ending that could still be ours, concealed from me until now. Hidden promises and false hopes were all I had left anymore, and in my blind grief I grasped at whatever I could purchase a hold on.

I sadly drew a loving hand over Edward's message and held onto the book tightly. Sometimes, if I didn't think to hard, I could imagine that those words still rang true. It was so hard for me to accept that the love we had had was lost in an abyss that I couldn't breach without Edward to guide me. What had happened to those carefree moments, the affectionate touches, the loving gestures?

It had all still been very much alive the day Edward gave me the book. I remembered it so well, as I could still recall with perfect clarity all the tender moments Edward and I had shared…

-Flashback-

We were cuddled up together on the couch after the most wonderful dinner at my favorite restaurant, La Bella Italia. Usually I enjoyed a night out with Edward, but tonight all I had wanted was to be home, alone with him. And now he was putting me through this torture.

"Edward, no more presents, please," I whined, more for show than in actual complaint. I'd given up beating Edward at this game long ago. Somehow or another, he continued to sneak around my order that he wasn't to give me presents for our anniversary. He had already skirted the rule twice, with dinner and a diamond necklace that even I had to admit was beautiful. But it was getting a little ridiculous. What else could he possibly give me? I didn't need anything but his heart.

Edward smiled patiently, obviously anticipating my inevitable reaction. "Bella, I bought this with money that belonged to me. You are my wife; therefore, what's mine is yours. Technically love, you bought this for yourself." He smiled widely at his teasing logic. "And besides," he added. "You'll love it."

I sighed and looked down at the inoffensive little rectangle sitting on my lap. "Fine," I huffed. "But if you ever do this again—"

"Don't be melodramatic, love," Edward cut me off, kissing my cheek. "Now open it," he commanded.

I rolled my eyes. "You're so pushy," I huffed.

"I love you too," he responded with a crooked smile; the one he knew I couldn't resist. I melted instantly and reluctantly started pulling at the wrapping paper. When the beautiful copy of Romeo and Juliet was free from its confines, my lips stretched into a small smile, and I felt a little choked up. Of course Edward would have noticed how battered my own copy of Romeo and Juliet was, and he knew that it was my favorite classic, whatever his distaste of it was.

Edward noticed my smile and he grinned crookedly in response. "I figured if I can't stop you from reading it…over and over and over – " he nudged me, "— then I don't have to watch you flip through that poor excuse for a book that you have right now."

"Hey! Be nice to my books," I complained. Edward's eyes sparkled, unrepentant.

"Look at the inside of the cover," he urged eagerly, ignoring me.

I raised an eyebrow but did as he asked. My gaze landed on a message, written out in Edward's unmistakable lacey script. I read it slowly once, twice, and then again.

"Oh Edward," I whispered, unable to stop the tears this time. I ran the tips of my left hand fingers over the inscription. Edward's fingers joined me after a moment and he laced them through mine, bringing my hand to his lips and kissing each of my fingers lovingly before kissing the wedding ring on my ring finger. I sniffled.

"It's not fair." I sighed.

"What's not fair love?" Edward asked, closing his eyes and holding my hand to his cheek. He inhaled deeply. He looked so beautiful, and I almost forgot what I'd been saying as I admired him.

"It's just…you do all this for me," I motioned to the book and the diamonds around my neck. "And I had no idea what to get you and—"

Edward cut me off swiftly, kissing my lips. "Oh, my Bella," he murmured, gazing at me solemnly with those emerald eyes. "Don't you see? You have given me you. That was already more than I asked for, and certainly more than I deserved. You owe me nothing, love." And he smiled crookedly.

I cuddled closer to him, trying not to let any space intrude the privacy of the moment. I pressed my face against his chest and breathed in the scent of him. One of his arms wrapped around me, bringing me onto his lap. His other hand lifted my chin so he could look into my face.

"Don't hide from me, love."

"I love you," I whispered back, touching his face.

And we kissed.

-End of Flashback-

I buried my face in my hands and cried.

……….

The phone still hadn't rung. My gaze flashed between the portable phone on the arm of the couch, the cell phone in my lap, and the book in my hand. I was trying to read, eager to attempt any method that would prevent the dread creeping up on me. It was nine thirty and Edward never called this late. Why wasn't he calling?

I didn't want to consider the possibility that he might not call at all, but as ten o'clock rolled around, I didn't know what to think. I contemplated calling him myself, but I was afraid that if he didn't pick up then my suspicions would be confirmed that he wasn't going to call at all.

Ten thirty. I was scared now. I moved to pace the kitchen, my eyes fixed on the phone resting on the counter, willing it to ring. In my panic, I resorted to biting my nails, a habit I had deserted years ago. When I finally stopped to consider my actions, I finally realized just how dangerous my obsession was. Literally, I couldn't live without him. I would have given up years ago, but I had to keep going, I had to live through one more year so that I could hear his voice.

Ten forty five. Fingers shaking, I reached for the phone. I had to do something, because the frantic twitching and pacing was getting me no where. I dialed the numbers that I knew by heart but had never had to punch into the keypad. I lifted the phone shakily to my ear.

Ring. Ring. Ring. Ring

No one picked up. All I got was an answering machine, and I resorted to listening to it only to hear his voice. He apologetically stated that he was not home and to leave a message. Not bothering to say anything after the beep, I slammed the phone down with a cry, my last shred of hope gone.

The tears flowed fast now and I was powerless to stop them. I rocked back and forth, clutching Romeo and Juliet against my chest. "Edward," I sobbed. "Edward, I love you. Don't go. Please…please…" But no amount of pleading would bring him back to me. It was all over this time. Really, truly all over. I collapsed on the kitchen floor, my cheek pressed against the cold tile, crying into the book.

Eleven o three.

The doorbell rang.

Crap. I froze in dismay. I really didn't need Alice or Rosalie or anyone else seeing me like this right now. They didn't need to know. I could be a big girl. I could deal with this on my own.

Wiping my eyes, I hastily got to my feet, choking back more sobs. In my hurry, my legs got tangled and I fell back to the floor. I heard Edward's amused chuckle in my head, but I pushed that thought down. No more. No more. If he was determined to leave me behind, then I would leave him behind too.

I swiped a few fingers through my matted hair and rubbed my eyes one more time before deciding that it was as good as it was going to get. Abandoning my book on the couch as I passed it on my way through the living room, I headed towards the door. Dreading whatever confrontation I was about to deal with, I opened it.

And froze.

And took a step forward. "Oh my god," I whispered, all my reactions completely reflexive now, because my brain had switched off. But I knew him. Still, after all these years, I knew him. The same tall, muscular body, the same messy bronze hair that couldn't stay in place no matter how long he combed it, the same emerald eyes that could speak more with a glance than any sentence uttered, the same emerald eyes that dazzled me, the same emerald eyes that I had fallen in love with.

Edward stuffed his hands in his jacket pockets. "Hello Bella," he said quietly. I didn't know what to think or say or do. My mind hadn't caught up with what was happening yet.

"If this is a bad time," Edward started to say, but I shook my head quickly. No matter what else I was uncertain of, like why he was here, and what he was thinking, there was one thing I knew for a fact and it was that I didn't want him to leave.

I stepped aside to offer him entry, still not saying a word. He gave a puzzled glance and slid past me. I followed.

"Wow, Bella…the place looks great," Edward said, attempting to fill the awkward silence with small talk.

That snapped me out of it, because 'the place' hadn't changed much since he'd last seen it, and I suddenly found that particular fact hilarious, because I started to laugh…no…not laugh exactly…chortle. Insanely. Because, now that I thought about it, I realized that I had been maybe one minute from true insanity in every literal sense of the word just before he arrived. And then, with perfect timing—because really, everything he did was perfect—he stepped in and saved me.

"Bella?" Edward asked in puzzlement, coming forward and gripping my arms. I let out a strangled sob, because I remembered his touch along with everything else about him, and the crying was added to the…chortling.

"Bella!" Edward said again, alarmed now. I felt myself collapse against him, and I leaned all my weight into his body, letting him hold me up.

"Edward…Edward," I moaned, crying.

"What's gotten in to you?" Edward shook me a little and I noted the concern and panic in his eyes as he tried to figure out what was going on.

Then it hit me. He was actually here. Standing in a place I never expected to see him in again, his arms wrapped tightly around me. Gazing at me with concern etched in every one of his features.

And I was crying my heart out without knowing anything about what was going on.

My eyes widened and my cheeks turned bright red with heat. I disentangled myself from his arms and backed up and few steps until I hit the arm of the couch. I looked everywhere but his eyes, appalled with myself. What would he think of me now? I wrapped my arms around my body, my eyes still wandering.

"Um…hi Edward," I mumbled, my face still flaming red. I vaguely realized that my legs were shaking and wondered why.

Edward looked relieved. "Well, at least I know you can talk."

Humiliated, I didn't respond.

Edward ran a hand through his hair. "My god Bella, don't scare me like that! What in the world were you thinking?" He laughed humorlessly. "I was two seconds away from calling 911, you know. Sheesh! I've never seen you spaz like that!"

He babbled on and I listened in confusion until I realized that he was scared stiff. Frowning, I took a hesitant step forward and Edward stopped talking. He watched me warily, probably anticipating another outburst.

But I said nothing, only reaching up to touch his face. I wanted him to relax. I didn't want him to be afraid anymore.

"I'm sorry," I murmured. "I'm ok now." More than ok, now that he was with me. "I was just…a little surprised to see you, that's all." Embarrassed, I quickly removed my hand and looked down at me feet.

"Only a little?" Edward drawled; a poor attempt at humor. But he sounded like he was trying to conceal disappointment, and I wondered why. Was he upset because he could see that I hadn't moved on? My throat closed at the thought.

I cleared my throat so that I could speak without giving myself away. "Um…would you like something to drink?" I asked, turning towards the kitchen.

He caught my arm. "Actually…well I was going to postpone what I came here to do for as long as possible, but after that—," I knew he was referring to my little 'spaz' episode, "—I think I'd better just tell you." He sighed and lifted my chin to look me in the eyes. "Because you're hurting as much as I am, aren't you," he guessed quietly. I stared at him with wide eyes, not willing to hope that he was actually saying what I thought he was.

Edward continued in that same quiet voice, never breaking my gaze. "Bella, I just wanted to say that I was a fool for thinking being separated from you would do me any good. It's done the exact opposite. I can't handle anything anymore, Bella. Not work, not people, not anything. You're all I think about. I got fired last month, and did you know that I haven't seen my family in seven years because I knew that they would only remind me of you?" I started to say something, but he put a finger to my lips. "I—I love you Bella. I mean that. I never stopped. I was such an idiot to think…" He shook his head. "If you don't want me Bella, I promise that I won't contest you're decision. I've behaved atrociously towards you, and I don't deserve your forgiveness. I know that. But please—consider it. I want you back Bella. I love you."

His green eyes penetrated me and I couldn't think. But I found my voice, finally.

"My books," I said slowly. He looked at me in confusion and I elaborated. "You said you would throw out my books if I didn't go to that stupid business party of yours." And I smiled sheepishly.

Understanding dawned in Edward's eyes and slowly, painstakingly slowly, the crooked smile that I loved lit up his face.

"You're going to have to give me that smile every day for the rest of my life if you want me to forgive you," I informed him smartly, rocking back and forth on my heels like a little girl sweet-talking her father into giving her a puppy.

"It's a deal." Edward promised.

Then he threw back his head and laughed joyously. He took me in his arms and lifted me off the ground, twirling us around in a circle. I giggled and locked my arms around his neck with no intention of ever letting go. I felt tears seep from my eyes, but they were happy ones this time, because finally, after seven long years, I was home.

Edward set me back on my feet at last, but never released his grip on me. I buried my face in his chest and inhaled his sweet scent.

"Don't hide from me, love."

I shivered at the sound of the endearment that I had missed for so long.

"I love you," I whispered back, touching his face.

And we kissed.

A/N - Ok...before anyone kills me, let me explain. First of all, there were a couple of you who wanted Bella to be the strong one who went to find Edward. I always like fics where Bella is the strong one, and in my next story that is going to be the case, but in this story it was never happening. I had this ending planned out since the beginning. I always imagined this Bella as a bit of a New Moon Bella, who was lost without Edward. She did handle it a little differently of course, because she didn't realize that losing Edward would break her heart until it was too late. She tried to stay strong, acting normal around her friends, but after years of pent up emotion and then finding out that Edward wasn't calling, it was too much, and her reaction became a New Moon Bella reaction, where she started going crazy because she just couldn't handle it. So...yeah. Please no flames. I was actually very pleased with this chapter. :)

Anyway...thanks to all of my readers!! I really, really appreciate it!! :D

I'm posting a new story now (a long one this time, haha), called Music in Vienna. I just postd the first chapter, so please go check it out. I really like how it looks so far. It takes place in Vienna, Austria (duh), and has a bit more to it than just a love story. Please read and review! I'd appreciate muchly! :p

Tootles!