Solitude

We fought again, I swear this time will be through, even if we already said our vows, I can't believe he would change that much, of course he was already weird months befor our wedding, we had constantly fought about non-sense and I was so close to call it off, we had been a couple for long time, we started dating age 16, then I dumped him, 'cause he was a jerk, and a ladies-man, I dumped him age 17, a whole year after that, we went back together, and we dated for 8 years, with ons and offs, he proposed to me when we were 21, and 5 years later we got married, january the 12th, in october we fought really harsh, I was gonna ask him the divorce, ut he pleaded and cried, he won me over with his words.

Now December, he made me cry again, I just can't take it anymore, we kept fighting over stuff and he is never home, he abandons me when I have a party with my girl-friends, they invite him over of course, but he never goes, and he yells at me that I'm cheating on him, and stuff like that, I loved him so much I could never had cheated on him. I have never felt more lonely than now that we are 'together'.

I asked him him for the divorce, now I will really leave him, he won't cry this over, he has been pleadingmy parents to convince me not to leave him, but when we are alone, he looks as if he doesn't care, he keeps eating while I that will leave him by my own word, can't even see food, he keeps being 'cool' with me, but when someone else comes, he looks sad and deffenceless.

I can't stand him anymore, my friends warned me about him, asked me to think it twice, but I was in love and heard no one, I thought he would change back to the loving caring boyfriend he was, but he didn't.

I'm done with him i hate him, I really do, it's just taking mer time to get rid off him than I thought, he keeps begging, and crying, he knows I can't stand a man crying, he asked me to go to therapy, but I told him off, I won't let him stand on my last nerve, I won't let him crush me with his words, he never hit me, but that doesn't mean he never hurt me, his words, his jealosy, his attitude were more than enough to crush me.