Since I have received an overwhelming amount of reviews/favorites etc. on my stories I will continue them in the new year along with my two new ones. Also this one is slightly like Changed just with things from later on in the manga, it is also the first S.A fic where I will answer all reviews.

S.A is property of Minami Maki

Please buy either the Hana to Yume / Shojo Beat editions or whatever is available in your country

Also: I'm sorry if the characters are OoC

~Myst

Chapter One: Absence makes the heart hollow

"Excuse me students of Hakusenkan. I have very saddening news for the academy, today Hikari Hanazono was announced dead. The cause was stated to be a train accident although more information is still needed. Hikari Hanazono was one of our brightest most promising students and it's---"

"STOP IT!!" a nineteen year old boy yelled as he stood in the middle of the street. He blinked his weak eyes and turned towards the familiar road, he had to come back here from time to time as if to prove that she existed. That she had left something. As the residents of the neighborhood turned around the blonde realized just how conspicuous he was. Afterall it was a sight, a university student with a briefcase and glasses yelling at nothing. Odd, very odd.

With a deep breath, the blonde put his fist to his forehead and struggled to control his pain. It had been this way since he had heard that news, the only emotion he knew these days was grief. No matter what happened, what his grandfather did to him or his parents said could shift the fact that he still mourned the death of his girlfriend. It had been so long since he saw her smiling at him, since he last kissed her, since he last realized that she was more beautiful than he had believed. Where was the light of his life?

Hearing a voice behind him, the nineteen year old turned in that direction.

"Kei?" an eighteen year old, redheaded, French girl called. "Kei, why did we come all the way out here? When your grandfather told me that we were engaged, I thought I was receiving someone a bit more high-class than you. Why don't you take me out to a res---"

The blonde turned to her with tears in his eyes, "Do you think I want to marry you?" he asked coldly before realizing his words. "My apologies." With that he turned and faithfully followed his grandfather's plan. For the past two and a half years Kei had felt lucky to have his grandfather pull the strings on him, at least that made him get up in the morning and live; without these orders he didn't think he could cope very easily. No, that wasn't true. Kei looked at the girl and his heart broke again, he was glad for the plans but not for the people. No girl ever carried what she had. No girl was Hikari.

"I.." the girl seemed to cry over Kei's insensitive attitude, "I like Kei very very very much. I thought I was doing what I could to be Kei's perfect woman."

The blonde stared at her in disbelief, how could she ever attempt to compare with Hikari? She was nothing like her and in that nothing like his perfect girl. "Celine," he whispered as he felt his barely stable walls shake around him, "You're never going to be able to do that. I'm still in love with someone, you're nothing more than an arrangement that my grandfather set up, and...a friend."

"But I can be so much better than that girl Kei! I know that your grandfather put the two of us together but don't you think that there's a deeper meaning for it, that we're...we're destined to be together! I can be better than that other girl! I'm your true love!" As she stood there she saw his eyes drift off to a wooden house, her head dropped at once. She wanted to cry, he wasn't thinking of her at all but this house, this woman. "This is where she lives isn't it!?"

The blonde felt his throat grow dry at that question and he turned his attention to the ground, "Used to..." He took one last look before drawing another breath in and touched the girl's hand. "How about we get something to eat?"

"Because you don't eat Kei," Celine responded sharply, "You just sit there and look sad. All you do is look sad, all the time." After saying that she came closer to him so that her hand could latch onto his, "Plus what do you mean by she used to live here? If she used to live here why not go to where she li--"

Kei took another breath in as the red-head reached that word and he looked back at her and dropped his head in defeat. "She used to live..." As he said that his stomach churned again as it always did when the truth came out, he couldn't handle it. He closed his eyes and put a hand on his chest before turning in to lean on a brick wall. He had to get his strength back somehow.

"Kei!" Celine spoke up as she got closer to him, "Kei what is it? I don't understand, you started to say something and..."

"She's dead!! The girl I love died over two years ago." He turned back and caught Celine's taken aback expression, he hadn't meant to yell at her like that it was just hard to accept. It was hard to accept that he'd never hear that laugh, see that smile or be able to carry his princess. Accepting that wasn't something he could do and even getting this close hurt more than anything.

Celine touched his back seeing how hard this was for him, unaware that a hooded figure was watching them. The person bowed their head closing their eyes and wished inside that they could stop the blonde's pain. However, it had been made very clear that if they got closer to the Takashima future they would be the reason for his downfall.

"Kei, everything will be fine" Celine commented, "I can make sure that you're taken care of, you should try to forget all about her."

There was silence as the blonde stood extremely shakily, "I think I need a few moments alone." He felt so weak and he didn't want to let it bother her. "Can you wait at the apartment for me?"

"Of course Kei," Celine whispered, kissing her fiancee on the cheek and gave the person standing there a rather odd look before taking another look at the blonde.

The hooded figure took a step closer before allowing themselves to mouth his name "Takashima." As they stood there watching over him those cold words played inside the blonde's head, that scene that could bring down anyone.

The greenhouse was an extremely sad place to be these days and everyone knew the reason. Hikari's death hadn't been received well by anyone. "So we're supposed to plan the cultural festival," Ryuu announced as he shifted through some of the papers on the table. "I say that we should do a..."

"Everyone should smile," Akira whispered before starting to cry but Tadashi held her closer. "Hikari loved festivals especially when she could see everyone smile." She looked over to the blonde who was in his own world, a world with some light in it still. "Kei, do you think we should do something in honor of Hikari?"

The blonde choked at this starting to feel breathless, he stared back at her with very wide eyes. "Like...like a goodbye?" he questioned in a desperate manner, something that the old Kei wouldn't have done. "No. It's not time to say goodbye, she still could...." he managed to force a somewhat creepy smile as the rest of the S.A felt their stomachs plunge.

"Do you know if it was an accident though?" Tadashi asked carelessly, "I mean, there are reports every so often about teenagers who comm----"

"Why would Hanazono kill herself!?" Iori, the new addition to the S.A, snapped back at them. Kei shuddered at how that was voiced and put his head on his lap. He blamed himself completely and everyone knew it, whether it was suicide an accident or even a murder he felt it was his fault. If he had met her at the station then she wouldn't have gotten hurt, he'd have been able to stop it. He could have stayed at the new apartment and driven her to the school. He would have moved the planets in order to do something if he knew that this would be the outcome.

"Has anyone been to see her parents?" Ryuu whispered, "Maybe...we could ask."

"I've spoken to them," Akira spoke up as Tadashi nodded, Iori took a long breath in before nodding himself. Kei stared at his lap before lifting his head and looked at them. His eyes were sore and he appeared extremely exhausted.

"It's not a happy place to be, there's no light there anymore." Kei whispered hugging himself before getting up and walked over to the door still not able to stand very well. This whole process was too much on him, how could he go back to life without her? She had changed him in all the right ways and he had lost her, he had lost his most precious person and the most important part of his life in one go.

"Kei," Tadashi called out to him, "Where are you going?"

The blonde refused to reply to that but instead spoke weakly, "There's no light in this room anymore. I want to find out where it's gone."

"You mean the light?" Tadashi asked, "But it's in the middle of the day there's light everywhere if that's what you're looking for."

"I mean my light!!" Kei snapped back at him unable to keep in control of his emotions anymore, "My Hikari!!"

End Chapter ONE-

Pocky to all reviewers ^-^