PRETEND

Ouran High School Host Club

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hi guys! This is my first fic for OHSHC! This is actually written for iu_fanfiction, but I also wanted to post it here. Enjoy! Reviews, please?

All disclaimers apply.

It was already 2 am, and she couldn't sleep. She turned to her right and looked at the silver glow of the moon. She couldn't sleep at all despite all the housework that she did since morning. She had her personal maid, but she loved doing things on her own. She massaged her temples and stood up. She looked at her husband peacefully sleeping on their bed. He looked serene and calm in his sleep, and the smile on his lovely face could tell that he was having a lovely dream.

Ootori Kyouya. After Tamaki married Éclair, she definitely strived to move on and forget about Tamaki. She wanted him to be happy; she knew that seeing his real mother would make him happy and contented. After all, Éclair is not as bad as she thought. Éclair visited them one summer and she actually got some time to spend with Éclair. She knew that Tamaki's mom worked at her household and had wanted to see his son after parting with him for so long. His mom's stories made her fall in love with Tamaki though she hasn't seen him yet. He was really adorable as a child. He took care of his mother back then. She went to Japan to see him, to let him know how she feels, but unfortunately Tamaki did not get a lovely impression from her. But she never gave up on how she felt. She yearned for Tamaki to return her feelings. Haruhi, after knowing all of this, thought that letting Tamaki go would be the best things. She helped Éclair to capture Tamaki's heart, despite the wreck that she was causing her heart to feel. After all, it would be best if Tamaki would see his mother and be happy with them. After letting Tamaki go, she saw everything that she wasn't able to see before. Then there was Kyouya. He was the one who held Haruhi at her weakest. He was the one who felt Haruhi's pain. She never thought that she could move on from the piercing pain that she was experiencing. He helped her heal; in fact he was the cure to what she felt. She learned to love Kyouya, and married him.

She opened the windows and let the cold gust of January breeze cool her face. Tamaki. When they visited this morning, she felt that pain again. She could remember Éclair's hand on his, his goofy face and Éclair's delight in his goofy smile. He hadn't changed much, but she could see how happy he was in Éclair's arms. It pained her so much, so much that she felt her heart break at the sight of them giggling at her husband's comical jokes. She grinned and squeezed her husband's hand. She loved the warmth on his hand as he squeezed it. Kyouya really loves me and I love him. I have moved on, haven't I? She glanced at her husband once again, and saw her face. No, she doesn't want to hurt Kyouya. Not Kyouya. She tried so hard to suppress this feeling that she feels whenever Tamaki is around. She wanted to give her full attention to Kyouya; she wanted to love him as much as Kyouya loves her. He never left her during the times that she needed someone the most. It's been a year since they got married, but Kyouya never regretted his choice. She shivered at the sudden blow of wind and she held her silk robe tighter against her slim frame. Flashbacks. Tamaki. Why did they have to leave so soon? We could've had a reunion with the other host club members for old times' sake. She felt a tinge of guilt as she took a peek at her husband who was sleeping peacefully. "Tamaki. If only fate didn't play a trick on us. We could've ended up together, ne?" She cried painful tears, tears that wanted to come out from her hazel eyes. Tears that had been welling up in her heart for so long, tears that could've been laughter and happiness. She carefully wiped her fragile tears, some of which wetted the snow-white blanket which covered their entire bed. She never stopped loving Tamaki. Her thoughts were always about him; her heart seemed to drift to where he is. She slipped inside the warm blanket and tried to sleep. She stroked her husband's hair and tried to brush Tamaki off her mind. He was like a ghost that kept on haunting her, an incurable disease that spreads throughout her system. She hated it; it was so unfair, knowing that Tamaki has gotten over their relationship a long time ago. She was stuck in this hell hole, a black hole that kept on pulling her back despite her tremendous effort in moving on.

"I love you, Kyouya. I do."

She knew that this was the biggest lie that she ever said in her life. She drifted off to sleep, not knowing that the person beside her wept.