Hey guys! I cannot believe how long it has been. See, with all the reviews on my Paintball oneshot, saying that I really should write a sequel, I felt really under pressure to make it as good as the first one. This one is still hopefully amusing, but it becomes more tactical as opposed to humorous while the actual battle plays out.

As I said, I'm worried that you all will be disappointed by what I have to give to you compared with how long you've all waited for this sequel, but here goes nothing!

Say hello to The Cullens and Paintball: Return of Bella.

Carlisle POV (just to be different)

I heaved a great; dramatic sigh. This again.

It was another normal day; early afternoon, and I had just come home from the hospital. Guess what I find greeting me around the back of the house near the woods; instead of the usual bored kids playing games or making out, and Esme in her garden.

I suppose you realise I am about to tell you.

Alice, handing out bulky packages of ammunition. My gentle Esme, putting together some scopes for the sniper guns. Emmett, wearing an intense, army-like expression on his face as he handed out guns one by one after loading them and firing them into the ground to check that they worked. The rest of them sitting around, looking excited at the prospect of killing.

A truly chilling sight.

After staring for a moment at the activities before me, I decided I had three choices. I could either back away quietly; join in the fun; or revolutionise the rules completely with my greatest and most awesome invention ever. And no, telling you what it is now would just ruin it for you. I might just wait until the time is right, then blow their minds with the unveiling of something so intense, something so clever, that they will not even see it comi-

"Carlisle has a great and awesome invention that he's deciding whether or not to tell us!" yelled Edward instantly. All heads snapped to me and Edward grinned like a little kid who got his enemy in trouble.

My eyes narrowed.

His eyes narrowed.

We narrowed our eyes at each other.

Alice POV

OOH! Even I didn't see that coming! It must have been totally spontaneous. LIKE SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION! That would hurt. HAHA! MAYBE EDWARD WILL SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST! Carly would laugh. HEEHEE he hates it when I call him Carly! CARLY AND EDDY HAHAH!

Maybe I shouldn't have tried to see if laughing gas worked on vampires.

Emmett POV

After lengthy discussion (I hope Eddy heard me talk like that) we got Carly to reveal his secrets. What he had was AWESOME! The game was automatically AWESOME! This was going to be AWESOME! And hopefully the teams would be changed this time otherwise us being owned again would not be AWESOME! D:

Carly POV

As expected, they got it out of me eventually.

When I revealed the syringe shots, Emmett nearly fainted (with happiness).

"Here they are," I said smugly. "The first ever knockout drug for vampires."

There were 'ooh's and 'aah's which I took with yet another self-satisfied smile. Then I explained the rules I had devised to harness fully the awesomeness of my little darts.

"Now, to make it fair for the game and not end it too fast, these only will penetrate if fired with an exceptionally straight aim from a distance, or if they just hit one of us close-range.
Say for example, Bella gets hit, okay? It goes in, she yells out in a moment of pain -just to make the game more exciting, the darts are quite painful for a moment – and she's down. Whoever shot her picks her up and takes her to somewhere he thinks her own team won't be able to find her, and then he runs off for more hunting. He's not allowed to guard her, and there's not much need – guarding is dangerous for him, and also, the darts are extremely potent. They-"

"How potent?" interrupted Edward suspiciously, an eye twitching. I watched it with my mouth slightly open to see if it would do it again. "It's not going to hurt any of us, is it?"

I sighed. Edward was somehow so... naïve.

"They won't kill, and they won't leave any lasting damage. Relax!" I assured him. "Anyway, the reason for me saying that guarding is pointless, is that once you get hit by a dart, you're down for at least twenty-four hours, unless someone from your team comes and revives you. Everyone will be given three antidote shots to administer as they will."

"Is that all?" asked Rosalie sarcastically. "That's not heaps to remember or anything."

She was met with awkward silence.

"Never mind," she muttered irritably.

Bella POV

"So, are we getting started?" I asked excitedly.

"Wait a minute, what about teams?" asked Emmett suspiciously. "We got screwed last time because the girls had Bella. We get her this time!"

"No, Emmet," said Alice evenly. "That was with paintballs. We were all moving human speed, so we should have technically been even, but Bella was at a slight advantage not having to concentrate on her speed, or not destroying the gun by holding it too hard – plus she had the handicaps we gave her anyway. This time, we're all total equals – and with vampire made guns too! I just love titanium..."

Emmett was left somewhat confused by all of this, and didn't respond. Alice was right, as everyone could see, but for Emmett, a simpler answer might have been required.

Rosalie leaned over and murmured, "... you actually have a chance this time, basically."

"Oh!" he said excitedly, sitting up. "Well let's go then!"

"Indeed," said Esme happily, making to stand up, but when she looked up again, everyone was gone. She pouted. "Oh, my violent family of idiots."

Then she smiled again.

"Idiots that I plan to beat! Come on, Dorothy! We're off to see the w-" began Esme manically, with a stupid smile on her face, before she was hit in the back of the net with Emmett's dart. She squeaked in shock for a second, then collapsed, one arm still raised in offering to the nonexistent girl from Kansas she had been talking to.

Emmett POV

HAH! YES! I actually got to FIRE MY GUN this time! Yes! And to top it all off, I know a great place to take her!

Which reminds me, I really have to get Bella. After the embarrassment of last time's scenario, everyone will be trying to get to her, and I have to be first!

And I will! Because it's only fair, a-HAHAH-... hurgnn....

Third Person POV

Emmett's body collapsed forwards, revealing a triumphant Bella standing behind him, gun outstretched.

"Hah!" she murmured quietly under her breath, kicking him in the chest lightly to make sure he was down. "Out like a light!"

She moved around him cautiously and bent down to examine Esme's fallen body. She reached one hand out, murmuring.

"Looks like a puncture straight to the base of the vertebra, possibly puncturing the spinal cord; very effective anthropologically speaki-EGO ASSINUM VITUPERO!" she interrupted herself, screaming out hysterically before jerking and tripping over her mother-in-law to land sprawled on her side, the picture of defencelessness.

"That'll teach her," muttered Edward, trying not to think about the fact that he had just shot his Bella. He was all prepared to go into a sermon in his head about his 'angel, so fragile and delicate and lovely and beautiful...' etc, but then his eye twitched in warning and he spun around.

"YOU-" he began hotly as he saw a flash of a tuft of spiky black hair, before it was prickling his face and a gun was jabbed unceremoniously upwards under his jaw.

"Night Edward!" called Alice cheerfully, and he gagged as he tasted the sedative that had been fired straight into his throat, and he fell.

Alice POV

I surveyed the scene with glee. They were ALL DEAD! ALL OF THEM! AHAHAHA! AND I WASN'T! They'd all wasted time being all stupid and heroic and stuff and surveying the scene, they'd forgotten, like complete FOOLS, to look behind the-

Carlisle POV

I felt a strange, unexplained satisfaction as I watched my hyperactive daughter's tiny body succumb to the poison almost instantly. I was perched on the roof, and sniping from there had a certain rogue feel to it that filled my limbs with manic electricity – it was adrenaline, and lots of it.

I wanted to jump, run, swing! Stretch my unbreakable muscles to their limits. Unfortunately, the very adrenaline pushing me to do this was preventing me from acting upon my urges – the smell of vampiric bodily chemicals is extremely strong to other vampires, and I'd be like a clown among mimes.

Ah, a very fitting analogy on many levels. I was just beginning to contemplate this when I was kicked sharply in the back, and I lurched forwards, half turning. Another sharp sting to my chest was felt a moment later, and I looked up to see my beautiful Rosalie, looking down at me with a mixture of satisfaction and glory, as she mercilessly flicked me off the roof with her foot.

I fell for an age, feeling like I was also falling through my mind – the drugs were affecting me. Unfortunately, as my body span to have me facing head-down (because the head is the heaviest extremity) I was still conscious, due to being a healthy adult male: the sedative took its time.

So, as my spine snapped with a sickening crack; my eyes began to prickle; and I lost all feeling from the neck down, I saw my daughter slide gracefully down the water drain on the side of my house and leap daintily over me to awaken her fallen comrades.

My last action as I succumbed to the darkness for God knows how long, was to slur out a sentence.

"Hurry youhr buhtt upp, Jhathpahh...."

Rosalie POV

My senses were in complete overdrive as I dashed at probably close to the speed of sound from body to body, carelessly stabbing antidote doses into the chests of my teammates. My eyes flickered around wildly, searching for any infinitesimal flicker or flash; my ears strained and muted breathing along with my hurried footsteps were the only sounds I heard, which unnerved and agitated me more than anything; my chest felt for all the world like a heart still resided there, thumping its living rhythm in a desperate encore to survive....

I was on total and complete alert.

As I flattened myself to the ground next to Bella, I looked at my last syringe. I wanted to save it, so I shoved it quickly into its cap with a satisfying click, and rummaged around in Bella's own hip bag for one of her needles. I stabbed her too, then rolled onto my back, keeping myself as squashed to the ground as possible, and held my breath.

The sounds of waking vampires and an already awake forest assaulted my sensitive ears. Maybe Jasper was too afraid to come close; formidable as I was.

After a moment, I dismissed that thought. I was alone in the middle of our backyard with slowly waking teammates sprawled around me in a slightly gruesome but highly amusing pileup of corpses. I had nowhere to run – if he was waiting for me to stand up so he could pick me off from a vantage point, he was going to have to wait.

I'd make Alice do it instead. He wouldn't shoot her... and even if he did, I'd still get away. Someone has to be beautiful.

Bella POV

My brain pounded inside my skull, as though it was trying to get out. I groaned loudly, and received a kick in the head for my trouble. I was about to loudly voice my complaints when Rosalie's urgent voice hissed into my already irritable ears and shushed me. Events of the thirty or so seconds before I joined the list of casualties trickled through my mind and I groaned at how stupid I'd been not to assess the situation before going in, then groaned once more because I groaned in the first place and I was supposed to be quiet,

Rosalie kicked me again.

Edward POV

Floating in the darkness... neither detached nor attached... there's some background noise...- what is that?

Sounds kind of like... music... what is this place? What's going on? Are we dead; did we die? Dammit Carlisle, if we're dead because of your stupid sedative, I'm going to damn well kill you.

The music is back... what the hell is that? It's getting louder, I wonder if it has lyri- ARGH!

Never gonna GIVE YOU UP!
Never gonna LET YOU DO-O-OWN!

'Oh, God! God, no! NO!!'

Esme POV

As I lurched sluggishly to consciousness, my mind blurted out the first things that it was aware of, before my mouth could catch up and think about what it was saying.

"Pull the hatch forward!" I squealed. "A value meal, you say? WHAT DAY IS IT GOOD SIR?"

My muscles twitched spasmodically and I jerked into a clumsy roll onto my belly.

"AND OUT OF THE OCEAN, THE GREAT CHALUPA KING. HE COMES WITH HIS MIGHTY BOLT OF ELECTRIC LIGHTNIGH FURY, MY CHALUPAS, I, DEFEND! FROM THE KING OF THE GREAT, CHALUPA SEA! WITH HIS ARMS OF MODERN STEAM POWERED ENGINE OF THE FUTURE-"

Alice POV

I bolted upright, my mouth responding to something my ears had heard but my mind hadn't actively processed.

"SIX NINETY-NINE FOR A VALUE MEAL, SIX NINETY-NINE FOR A VALUE MEAL!"

Jasper POV

I watched my sister and adoptive mother hysterically screaming out the lines to the song that the disembodied head on 'The Cloak' sings at the beginning, before Rosalie hauled them up irritably, ushering them away.

I decided to ignore their insanity, putting it down to after-effects of the sedative and its antidote.

I surveyed the scene, my geotactical mind processing the scene automatically. I knew that if I fired at them, they'd all come after me, and no matter how accurate I was, I only had three needles per-clip, and there would still be one to chase me down while I reloaded.

I waited with bated breath as they stumbled together into the woods opposite my perch. Rosalie was frustratedly ushering them all along quickly, her head snapping back to look anxiously over her shoulder every now and then.

TO BE CONTINUED

Yes, that's right, my lov-er-ly readers, I decided to chapter-ise this one so I didn't have to sit down for four hours writing ten thousand words (exaggeration, I know, I know). It'll only be two or possibly three chapters; I just don't want to sit here typing on and on. :D