Here it finally is - the epilogue and the last chapter of this story. I hadn't initially planned to write it at all - in the initial story plan, the previous chapter was the last. But then you all kept asking for a wrap-up on this particular storyline in your reviews, so I decided to write this in the hope that it will give what you were looking for.

Thanks for going on this ride with me. I really enjoyed writing this story, and I hope you'll enjoy reading this last part.

Just keep in mind that this story is set after "Sex and Violence", back when there were no revelations about the demon blood, let alone Ruby. So it has become a little bit AU for all things that happened after that episode.

Enjoy!

Epilogue

He had imagined it differently.

Dean knew himself, and while he wasn't the type for self-reflection on a good day, he knew very well about his own shortcomings. Or whatever Sam and Bobby as well as other assorted people would call his shortcomings.

So yeah, he was vengeful. He held grudges.

Personally, Dean thought he had every right to. Especially in this case.

Nobody tried to mess with what was his and just walk away from it. Nobody. Not like this.

From the moment he had been able to hold a gun again, Dean had been thinking about retaliation. No, revenge. Pure and simple revenge. A clear message, short and distinct. Bloody, too. And knowing what he did about himself, Dean had imagined it all to go down quite differently.

He had thought blinding red rage was going to be involved, the kind where the rational part of his brain stopped functioning, leaving it up to that primal urge deep inside of him to deal out punishment as it was earned.

He had fully expected to lose control over himself and not regret a single second of it later.

But it all turned out different.

It was a bit anticlimactic, even.

The moment the door to the barn opened, Dean felt an eerie feeling of calm settle over him. Of course the distant, primal part of his brain was screaming to jump at that bitch and tear her from limb to limb, to rip her apart with his own bare hands and squeeze every last dark drop of demonic blood out of her body to make sure she would never, ever mess with their lives again, but Dean took a deep breath and closed the lid on that dark gorge inside his head.

It was surprisingly easy, and wouldn't that have been food for thought in every other situation. But not now.

Now, all of Dean's attention was focused on watching Ruby as she entered the barn and walked inside the seemingly empty building. Dean could see her stop in the middle of the room, her eyes roaming around searchingly. Ruby's gaze passed the old wooden partition behind which Dean was hiding without the slightest moment of hesitation, and through the gaps in the old wood Dean watched as she turned around once, looking left and right, then stepped further into the barn towards the ladder leading up to the hayloft.

The moment she turned her back on him, Dean slowly rose from his crouching position and silently stepped up behind her.

"I wouldn't climb up that thing."

Ruby spun around, and with a grim satisfaction Dean watched surprise and shock flitter across her expression as she recognized who was standing behind her. Dean cocked an eyebrow and allowed a grin to pull up the corner of his mouth.

"The thing's old and rackety. You might catch a splinter or something."

Ruby's eyes went from Dean to the wooden partition he had been hiding behind, then to the barn door as if judging the distance and her chances to make it there before he caught up with her. After a second or two, a scowl settled on her face and she crossed her arms in front of her chest defiantly.

"Dean."

He would have thought it impossible to fit as much contempt into one syllable as that, but somehow she managed to.

"How did you…" Ruby interrupted herself and shook her head. "Of course. The hex bags."

Dean reached inside his jacket and withdrew the cloth-bound bag, tossing it to the floor now that it had outlived its usefulness.

"You can say about witches whatever you want, and trust me, I don't have many good things to say about your kind, but they do have some useful tricks. You had no clue that you weren't alone, did you? By the way, if you're looking for Old MacDonald, our farmer is on his way to the local ER. He's going to be fine, even though that particular demon wasn't too keen on going back to hell."

Seeing Ruby's slightly flabbergasted expression, Dean couldn't help but laugh.

"Now come on. You didn't seriously expect that it was going to be hard to find you. For the past months you've done nothing but chase every demonic omen in the hope that it was going to get you closer to finding Lilith. Whatever effed-up reason you have for running after her like a lost puppy, it made finding you a piece of cake."

Ruby's eyes narrowed. "Sam and I had a deal. I helped him save your life, and he was not going to come looking for me."

Dean shrugged. "Yeah well, Sam might have made that promise, but I didn't. Trust me, I was screaming bloody murder on the inside the whole time while the two of you were chatting."

Dean took a step towards Ruby, and with a grim satisfaction he noticed that Ruby took a corresponding step back, careful to keep the distance between them. Dean kept moving, his hands hanging unthreateningly by his side, but keeping up the constant motion so that Ruby didn't get a moment's respite and was constantly focused on where Dean's next step was going to place him.

"Just in case you were wondering, the demon had no idea where Lilith is."

Ruby laughed hollowly. "What, you're giving out information now?"

Dean shrugged. "I felt like sharing. You know, for old times' sake."

The words tasted bitter in Dean's mouth, but for now he wanted to keep Ruby talking while he waited for the right moment.

"Truth be told, you were here a little faster than anticipated. I thought for sure it would take you longer to get here from Wyoming."

Ruby struggled hard, but Dean saw the flicker in her eyes for a second. He chuckled.

"Now come on. Once you figure it out, you're very easy to read. There's demonic omens all over the States, and you're trying to find out which ones are the trail Lilith is leaving. The bitch seems to have a knack for leaving chaos and destruction wherever she goes, right? And that's what you're looking for. Crop failures and magnetic storms to tell you where a demon could be, mysterious disappearances and particularly heinous domestic violence, and presto! Ruby makes a run for it to look if Lilith is in town. Am I right?"

Ruby bit her lip, her mouth pulling into a grimace, but Dean could clearly see that his words had hit a mark. And really, if she hadn't wanted anyone to know how she was going on about finding Lilith, she shouldn't have told Sam all about it.

"So, Wyoming was a bust, right? Bobby thought as much. A problem requiring an exorcism, but nothing anywhere near Lilith's league. And you were too late for the party there, too. That must really suck."

"You don't know anything, Dean."

"Oh no?" He took another step, slowly edging them under the hayloft without Ruby noticing where they were going. "I know that whatever reason you have for finding Lilith, you sure seem to be out of luck. Did you ever think that maybe Lilith doesn't want you to find her?"

"Of course she doesn't!" Ruby shook her head. "I want her dead just as much as you do."

"Trust me, you don't. Besides, you seem to forget that while you had your little moment of revealing it all at the motel, I was lying there on the bed hearing every word you said. You might have had Sam wrapped around your little finger with all the lies you fed him, but don't you go around trying to tell me that you're trying to find Lilith for the greater good. Whatever the hell you're up to, it's nothing good as far as I'm concerned. And it's going to stop now."

He took another step towards Ruby, and as he had thought she took another step back. Dean would have laughed about how easy it was to anticipate her if he could have spared a thought.

"You're not going to kill me, Dean. You're not."

At that, Dean actually couldn't help the laugh that escaped. His hand strayed near the hilt of the knife where he had pushed it inside his jeans, not touching it, but reassured by its presence.

"And why ever not?"

Ruby cocked an eyebrow and for the first time since Dean had revealed herself made a step to the side that was not an immediate reaction to something Dean had done. Crossing her arms behind her back, she smiled and looked at Dean from the corner of her eyes.

"Tell me Dean, how is Sam these days?"

Something inside of Dean clenched at Ruby's mentioning of Sam's name, but he forced down any reaction. She wasn't going to goad him like that. Not again. Not with Sam. Ruby was only trying to get the upper hand in the conversation again, the desperate attempt of a demon who knew that she was cornered. Nothing more.

Things were good between him and Sam. Better than they had been since his return from Hell. That was something Dean was sure of, and nothing Ruby said could change that.

"We both know our Sammy, Dean."

"Don't call him that," Dean snarled, but Ruby only laughed.

"Don't you try to change the subject. We both know him, and we know that he wouldn't break a deal he made when his dearest brother's life was hanging in the balance. Sam would have never gone against his word and sought me with the intention to kill me. I gave him what he wanted, for a final time, and he was only too happy to let me go once the witch was dead. So what did you tell him? How did you explain your sudden need to know how I was going on about finding Lilith? And what did you do once you thought this might be a place I was going to come looking for her?"

Ruby took another few cocky strides to the side, walking in a half-circle around Dean. Dean turned with her, always keeping his face towards her. Their little dance was moving them slowly but surely directly underneath the hayloft, and Dean didn't stop it. He kept careful track of their movement, but in the meantime was content to let Ruby talk.

"Or did you wait until he was asleep before you snuck out of the motel room? You Winchesters seem to have a knack for that kind of thing. Sam was getting pretty good at it."

Dean only shook his head. "You know nothing about us."

"Oh no?" Ruby laughed, her confidence getting stronger as the conversation progressed. "I know enough, trust me. I know enough about Sam. Things he'd never even dream about telling you. And I know you, and how desperate you are to keep Sam by your side. I know how afraid you are of being alone, of seeing even your freak of a brother desert you and leave you all on your own. Because we both know that as soon as you're alone you're not going to see any more reason to keep living. Isn't that so, Dean?"

The words were like a sucker punch to Dean's gut. He knew that they shouldn't be touching him like they did, but he couldn't deny that there was some truth to them.

"So we both know you're not going to kill me, Dean. You're not going to sneak back into the motel room and feed Sam some crap story about how you had to go on a burger run in the middle of the night while he thought the job here was long finished already. And because you're nothing but a big pathetic baby, you're not going to burden Sam with the knowledge that you went behind his back and broke his word in his stead. So yes, I'm fairly sure that you're not going to kill me, Dean. You don't have what it takes."

"Like Sam has?"

Ruby's smile grew feral. "Like Sam has. He has a big part to play, and I have no doubt that when the time comes, he's going to step up to all expectations. Supersede them, even. If you weren't holding him back, Sam could already be great."

Dean felt a twinge in his gut as Ruby threw Sam's exact words at him. They shouldn't hurt anymore, but they did. And probably they would hurt for a long time to come.

"And that's why you were trying to make him leave me behind."

"It would have been so much easier." Ruby shook her head. "Sooner or later he's going to do it anyway, Dean. Better prepare. One day Sam is going to leave you behind. It would have been so much easier to just end it now. And he had been grieving for you already, but I'm sure you witnessed all that firsthand. It would have been the best for everyone if Sam had just turned around and never looked back when he had the chance. I only want what's best for Sam, do you really blame me for trying to make him see that?"

Dean laughed, a harsh and mirthless sound that sounded strange to his own ears.

"You know, I should thank you for that."

And Ruby's feeling of superiority seemed to crumble a little at that non-sequitur.

"What?"

"I should thank you for making Sam believe I was dead even when you knew better. And for trying to make him leave me behind."

"And why would you have to thank me for that?"

Dean smiled, knowing an opportunity to grasp the upper hand in the conversation again when he saw one. And this was one he wasn't going to let pass.

"Because without your little mind-games, Sam and I would probably still be lying to one another. We'd still be keeping things from one another, chasing after Lilith and other demonic bitches without realizing that we're missing something important here. If you hadn't tried to make Sam leave me for dead, we might have figured that out too late."

Ruby looked flabbergasted for a moment, the smile dying on her face before she forced it back on again.

"Oh. So you and Sam talked, is that what you're trying to tell me?"

They were standing under the hayloft now, and when Ruby made a step to the side, Dean stepped in the same direction, blocking her path to walk out from it.

"Nearly losing everything kinda puts all the other stuff into perspective, it seems."

"I'm sure it does." Ruby shook her head, looking at Dean with what would have been a pitying expression on any normal human being with feelings. "Listen Dean, I don't want to rain on your parade, but I've spent a lot of time with your brother lately. And trust me, Sam seemed anything but ready and willing to open up about what we were doing when he snuck out on you. And with good reason. Trust me Dean, if you know only half the things your brother did while he was with me, you wouldn't be standing here chatting with me. You'd be a pathetic mess. For the past years, you've done nothing but tell Sam where to go and what to do! You've been controlling his entire life, forcing what you thought was best onto him, and beating him down whenever what he wanted to do went against what you thought best. So answer me one question Dean – after all that, how can you think that whatever Sam told you was even close to half the truth? After all the secrets, the contempt, the hate – how can you be sure that he's ever going to reveal everything to you again?"

It was Ruby's big gun.

It was the moment when she thought she was pushing his buttons. Dean knew that.

It was what Ruby did: planting doubt, using their weaknesses against one another.

And she was right. After all the lies, the mistrust and deceit, Dean should have every reason to doubt that Sam had told him everything. Sam had lied before about what he had done. He had kept things from Dean before.

It didn't take a genius to figure out that trust was their weak spot, and while Ruby was no genius she definitely was a great schemer and a manipulative bitch who knew her job.

But Dean didn't only remember the lies. He also remembered the conversations he had had with his brother ever since they had left the motel after the witch's spell had been broken. He remembered the only rule to these conversations – everything on the table, no holds barred, and no accusations.

And most importantly, Dean remembered how Sam had struggled to tell some of the things he had been hiding from Dean, how hard it had been for him to reveal some of the downright lies he had told his brother. Dean remembered the moments when it had seemed as if Sam would prefer somebody gauging his eyes out with a rusty spoon to speaking out his next words, and how he had still said them. And he remembered how it had felt when their roles had been reversed and Sam had been the one to force unpleasant truths from him.

It hadn't been comfortable. It had been anything but. But it had been necessary, and it had been good for them. It had been the purge they had needed, and well worth the pain in the end.

Well worth it all because Ruby's words did not have the effect the demon desired. About a month ago that would have still been different, but right now Ruby's words didn't cause any pain, or doubt.

After everything that had happened over the past weeks, he and Sam were past that. Or so Dean hoped and prayed. But there was one thing he was sure of, and that was that Ruby was never ever going to stand in between them again.

He wasn't going to start that whole vicious circle all over again by doubting his brother now.

And when her words didn't have the desired effect of either unsettling Dean or setting him into a fit of denial-induced rage, Ruby seemed to realize that something had shifted since the last time her path had crossed that of the Winchesters. She took another step to the side, but this time Dean made no move to hide that he was blocking her way out of the barn.

Within a few seconds, the balance of power in their conversation had shifted again, and Ruby hadn't even noticed. Dean sneered at Ruby as the realization sank in and something like fear started to show on her face.

"You know, you keep saying how you remember what it's like to be human. But somewhere down the line, between Hell and screwing with people up here, you have forgotten that there's more to being human than living and breathing and not having to worry about being sent back to hell any second. And you know what? I feel sorry for you."

All pretence of control had vanished from Ruby's face, but at those words she visibly bristled.

"You what?"

"I feel sorry for you, Ruby."

Ruby shook her head and took a small step forward.

"How dare you? You pathetic, weak and self-loathing bastard have the guts to tell me that you feel sorry for me? You are nothing, Dean. Your brother could be everything you always wanted to be and never had the chance to, and you say you feel sorry for me because I'm able to see that while you're still stuck in denial?"

Dean smiled, a genuine, pitiful smile, and shook his head.

"No. I feel sorry for you because Hell has burnt away so much of your soul that you think what you remember about being human is real emotions. You have no idea what it means to be human, Ruby. You have no clue about loyalty, trust or devotion, or even about love. You have no idea what it means to be human anymore, and yet you're clinging so much to the idea that you still know all that. Makes you the pathetic one of us, don't you think? You remember being human, and you remember that once upon a time you had all that, but now all that's left of it is an even darker pit in your black hole of a soul. And now you envy everyone who can still feel all these things that you only have a lingering memory of. And that, Ruby, that's why I feel sorry for you."

Ruby's mouth gaped open, and for a few seconds she made move to speak but no words came out. Dean watched her with a shake of his head.

"And there's another thing that you'll never learn."

Ruby looked up at Dean, some of the defiance back in her eyes.

"And what would that be?"

"To pay attention so that nobody can maneuver you underneath a Devil's Trap."

Dean grinned and let his eyes flicker up towards the hayloft above them. Ruby's eyes grew wide, and then her gaze went upwards to follow Dean's.

To the wooden floor of the hayloft.

The bare wooden planks that were unmarred by chalk or paint.

Because yeah, the plan had been to put a Devil's Trap right there, but that had been before Ruby's early arrival had screwed up the schedule.

But Dean didn't wait for Ruby to register that little fact. The second her eyes glanced upwards, Dean burst into movement. He pounced, crossing the distance to the demon in one big leap, while he pulled the knife out of the waistband of his jeans mid-movement. He brought his arm up, ready to bring the knife down once and for all, but Ruby must have seen the movement from the corner of her eye, the fragment of a second before it would have been too late for her.

Dean felt a strong blow to his arm and nearly lost his grip on the knife. His momentum carried him forward and into Ruby, and the two of them tumbled to the dry straw on the ground of the barn. The impact knocked the air out of Dean for a second, but he tried to tighten his grip on the knife instead of letting go. The element of surprise was no longer on his side, and he knew he'd better end this before it turned into a long physical fight.

But Ruby had seen the knife and knew that this time Dean wasn't going to back down on his threat to kill her. So she fought with desperation. And with unfair tricks. Just as Dean brought up his left hand and curled it into a fist to use his momentary upper hand, Ruby pushed at him and rammed a knee at him from below – right into his groin.

Ruby's angle was off so that the blow didn't hit him full force, but damn it hurt plenty. Eyes watering from the pain, Dean forgot about punching Ruby and instead grabbed the lapels of her jacket, pulling her up and banging her head hard against the concrete barn floor. Then he punched her.

But she was a demon, and the woman whose body she inhabited was long since dead. With no consideration whatsoever about possible damage, Ruby lurched up and threw Dean off of her. But even as she still scrambled to her knees, Dean was lunging towards her again. He didn't even bother to get up entirely. Instead he scrambled to his knees and lunged headfirst into the demon just as she was about to get up again, at the moment when her balance was still somewhat shaky.

Again, they tumbled to the floor, straw everywhere around and between and above them, and Dean struggled to get a solid grip on the knife again. He raised his right arm to bring the knife down, but Ruby was fighting him tooth and claw, holding against his arm with both her hands, straining and panting with the effort.

Dean was still reeling with pain from his nether regions – and honestly, she had earned to die like the bitch she was just for that – but this time he was clever enough to keep his most private parts well away from her knees. But it was a battle of strength that wasn't going anywhere for the moment. With both her hands Ruby was able to hold Dean off, and lying on the ground with no leverage whatsoever Dean would need to let go and get to his feet again to get the knife in the demon somehow. And something in his brain was simply unwilling to let go and give Ruby another shot at getting to him before he got to her.

No, it was pushing her down until her strength ran out and he could stick the knife in her.

But then there was suddenly a touch to his hand, the grip of fingers encircling his wrist and going for the knife. For a second Dean was confused. Ruby still had both her hands on his forearm trying to push him off, and his free hand was clawing at hers in an attempt to pry the fingers off. So the appearance of a fifth hand out of nowhere confused him and sent his mind reeling for a second.

But only for a second.

Then Sam's voice said "Dean, I got it!", and Dean let go of the knife, and in one movement twisted to the side, letting himself fall to the ground. He took a firm hold on Ruby's arms with his hands, and stunned as she was by Sam's sudden appearance Ruby was too shell-shocked to let go of Dean's arm in time.

Dean rolled to the side, and his hold on Ruby and his momentum turned the demon right with him, exposing her side.

Ruby's face was right in front of his, and for a second all Dean saw was how her eyes widened in recognition and fear. Then her whole skull seemed to light up from the inside, her body jerked and convulsed a few times as her grip on Dean's arm tightened. With a final groan and flash of orange light glowing underneath her skin, her hands went slack and she sank to the ground unmoving, eyes staring ahead brokenly.

Dean freed his arm from her hands and rolled to the side, panting hard and finally able to curl up around his aching…middle, groaning in pain. Sam was by his side in a second, hand on his shoulder and his voice worried.

"Dean? What's wrong? Are you hurt?"

The feeling of witnessing Sam's panic and being unable to do anything to react to it was still too fresh in Dean's mind. Dean didn't want it to ever be repeated, no matter how bad the pain in his groin was right now. So with superhuman effort Dean uncurled slightly and shook his head.

"She kicked me. Right where it hurts most. That bitch!"

Sam chuckled, a relieved bubble of laughter not even Dean could begrudge him for, and patted his shoulder a few times.

"Come on. Let's get out of here, and I'll buy you a beer and an ice pack."

"Ha, ha. You're a riot, Sam."

But Dean stretched out his hand and allowed Sam to pull him to his feet. Standing slightly hunched over, he put his hands on his thighs and breathed deeply a couple of times, waiting for the pulsing pain to stop. Sam's hand unerringly went to his shoulder again, squeezing once.

"You okay?"

Dean brought up one of his own hands and patted Sam's. "I'm good."

He straightened fully and looked over at Ruby's body, barely noticing that Sam's hand slipped off his shoulder as she did so. Ruby was lying on the ground, her own knife sticking out of her side where Sam had rammed it between her ribs.

As Dean looked, Sam went over and bent down over Ruby's body. He pulled the knife out of her side and with a disgusted grimace wiped off the blood on the dead demon's jeans before he put it into the inside pocket of his jacket. Then he looked up at Dean and shook his head.

"Dude, I told you it was stupid to leave you here while I took the farmer to the ER."

Dean just waved his brother off. "Nah, it's okay. I had it under control."

Sam raised an eyebrow and cocked his head to the side. "She kicked you, Dean. In the groin."

Dean shrugged. "And now she's dead. That should teach her."

He looked up at Sam, and for a second something passed between them that Dean would have been unable to put into words. He only knew that it was something important, and for a second time stood still as the last thing that had been unsettled between them was put to rest.

Dean nodded his head at the door to the barn that stood still open from Sam's hurried entry.

"Come on, let's go. It's over."

Sam nodded, then looked down at Ruby for a second. When he looked up again, Dean had the feeling that somehow his little brother was standing straighter than before.

"Yeah, it's over."

For a moment they kept their gazes locked, then they both turned and walked towards the door and out to the car. Time to put this to rest and focus on the more pressing matters in their lives. The Apocalypse. Lilith. Or maybe something less worrying for just one night. That promised beer and ice pack sounded good. If Sam threw in a burger, some fries and a crappy horror movie on TV, things were good in Dean's world.

The End.

Thanks for reading. As always, please let me know what you think. Thanks a lot.