Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia. Or its characters. Or anything. I do however own my writer's block for my other story…

A/N: I love the Zelos/Lloyd pairing to bits. But reading the stories with it, it looks like in most of them, Zelos is all too close to a rapist. And what's with the crap of Lloyd always getting bottom? Yea, so I decided to see what I could do about that. I'm trying to stay true to their characters so…please let me know how I'm doing.

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"Lloyd earned the title of Mr. Oblivious!"

Chapter one: the Coliseum.

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"It totally smashed me into the ground!" Zelos pouted. "My beautiful face!"

"Shut up," Lloyd said. "Professor, you can heal him, right?"

Raine sighed. "I don't think he needs…"

"You don't think I need healing?" Zelos sputtered. "Come on! I thought I was going to die! When it started spitting those fireballs at me…" He shuddered. "I'm maimed. I may never look as gorgeous as I once did again! It's a terrible tragedy for the world!"

Lloyd rolled his eyes. "So, are you all right or aren't you?"

"Do I look all right?"

"You're never all right," Genis piped up.

"Shut up, brat."

"Damages to Zelos's body appear to be close to nothing," Presea said. "Chances of death or permanent injury…approximately zero percent."

"What about scars?" Zelos pleaded. "I don't want my beautiful body marred, you know!"

There was dead silence.

"I'm not feeling the love…"

Lloyd rolled his eyes. "At least I was still cheering for you. Everyone else was cheering because they liked seeing the Dragon Knight smack you across the floor with its axe."

"Aw, come on. That was painful, man…"

"The point is, I was still cheering, okay? I said I would. Even after you got smacked into the wall and started crying."

"I wasn't crying! I was…laughing."

"Sure, sure. Whatever." Lloyd stood, obviously trying hard not to laugh.

"It's not funny," Zelos said indignantly.

"Look, Zelos, I'll show you how it's done. Besides, someone has to earn back the money you lost." Lloyd stood up and registered himself in the Advanced Singles Match. "Just you wait."

"You think you can win? When the Great Zelos Wilder failed?"

Lloyd rolled his eyes again. "You got smacked by an axe, Zelos. I think I can probably do better than that. Besides, you're slow."

"I'm not slow!"

"And it looks like you're dancing in the middle of battle. At least I look like I'm fighting."

"It's my natural agility!"

"You're not supposed to dance when you fight!"

"It keeps them from knowing where I'll be next."

"The Dragon Knight got you pretty well."

"That's different. Its axe was bigger than I was."

"Whatever. I'll still get farther than you ever will."

Lloyd's name was called and he moved to go inside.

"Hey! Lloyd!"

Lloyd glanced back. "Yeah?"

"Uhh…" Think of something to say. Anything. Like…good luck. Or you can do it. Or…or…damn, he was drawing a blank. He suddenly blurted, "put on a show that will make me fall in love."

"Yeah!" Lloyd agreed, proceeding through, oblivious of Zelos smiting himself on the head repeatedly, wondering what in all the levels of Niflheim had possessed him to say that.

Sheena immediately smacked him.

"Ow!"

"Don't be creepy towards Lloyd!" she snarled.

"Ow…Why? Would you prefer I was creepy towards you?"

She smacked him again, and he fell to the ground.

"Just leave Lloyd alone!" she said, then stalked off.

"I thought I was gonna die again…"

"Maybe you could stop being so weird, then," Genis suggested, seeming almost…civil.

"All I said was…"

"Something that could be easily misinterpreted," Regal finished, also glaring at the ex-Chosen.

"Oh…come on. You know Lloyd. Even if someone was in love with him and told him flat out, he wouldn't notice."

Colette was suddenly flushing and finding the ground very interesting. "No kidding," she muttered to herself. Still, Zelos heard it, and he felt his eyes narrowing before he could wonder why.

"Chance of Zelos falling in love with Lloyd and Lloyd noticing…approximately two percent."

"That much?" Yuan asked, suddenly popping up from nowhere as he so often did.

Zelos screamed a very high-pitched scream, then cried, "Don't do that!"

"You scream like a girl."

Zelos crossed his arms and turned away, grumbling. He didn't scream like a girl. He didn't dress like a girl. And he most certainly didn't look like a girl!

"He's fighting the Dragon Knight," Yuan noted.

"Avenge my honor, Lloydie!" Zelos screamed out towards his friend.

Lloyd gave him a 'yeah, yeah' look from below, then gripped his swords more tightly and faced the dragon that was easily ten times his size, appraising it carefully.

Zelos watched the red-clad swordsman, chin on his hands, somehow unable to pull his eyes away. The way Lloyd would move around the huge monster, taking every opportunity that presented itself, no movement wasted, and—

"Kratos won't be happy when he notices you're leering at his only son, Zelos," Yuan said in a singsong voice barely quiet enough to not be overheard.

Zelos flushed. "Sh…shut up! I'm not leering!"

"Still, I can't blame you. He is pretty hot…kind of like his father." Yuan then fell into a dreamy silence.

"Are you in love with Kratos?"

"Me? No. No, not at all. Why would you say that?"

"No reason…"

"Exactly. No reason. No reason at all."

"Is that why your eyes are going all shifty?" Genis asked, sliding up and looking at the angel. Zelos had a minor panic attack as he wondered how much the young mage had heard.

"What are you talking about? My eyes aren't shifty."

"Sure. And Zelos wasn't leering at Lloyd."

"I WASN'T LEERING!"

Everyone turned to stare at them. Genis had a smirk on his face. Yuan looked amused.

"At….at Sheena, I mean."

"Creep!" Sheena yelled, smacking him upside the head with her Money Bag from Luin.

"Ouch!"

"Will you all please be silent?" Presea said, sounding almost irritated. "I cannot hear the announcer."

They fell silent, and Zelos decided it was far too dangerous to look at Lloyd, so he looked at the Dragon Knight. It didn't stay that way for long, though. Before he knew it, he was staring at Lloyd again.

Well, I might be watching his technique. To see why he's doing so much better than I did. But I'm NOT leering!

Really. Honest.

The Dragon Knight suddenly spat a steady stream of fire at Lloyd, forcing him back. It continued to spit its fireballs of doom at him, then smacked him into the ground with its unnaturally long and giant and evil axe (also of doom).

"That's what got me," Zelos said, but no one seemed to care.

Lloyd forced himself up and unleashed a Double Demon Fang before the axe could hit him again. The Dragon Knight exploded as monsters always seem to when they're killed. Lloyd grinned his idiot grin as he managed to stumble off the Arena floor.

"Told you I'd do it," Lloyd said smugly.

"Bud!" Zelos suddenly hugged Lloyd. "I thought you were going to die!"

"Aaack! Can't…breathe…"

"Zelos," Raine said impatiently, tapping him on the shoulder with her staff. "Let Lloyd go so I can heal him."

"Oh, so you'll heal him, but not poor little old me? I feel so alone…"

"Are you usually this dumb or do you have to work at it?" Yuan asked.

"Ouch…"

Kratos entered and opened his mouth to say something when Yuan let out a squeak.

"Is there a mouse in here?" Sheena asked.

Raine looked around nervously. "M…mouse?"

Yuan suddenly started doing some stuttering that would have put Genis to shame.

"Yuan," Kratos said, sounding almost concerned. "Your face is red. Do you have a fever?"

Yuan let out a high-pitched wail and ran off in the other direction. Kratos gave the retreating Renegade a confused look that had been seen on Lloyd's face all too often.

"So, old man!" Zelos said, feeling the need to force some cheerfulness into all this. "What brings you here?"

"An old friend—Will Raynard—sent me here to get a sample of a Dragon Knight." Kratos sounded vaguely irritated. "Apparently one of the last remaining."

"It exploded," Colette said.

"It…what?"

"Lloyd did it!" Zelos said.

Lloyd glared. "Zelos!"

"Well, you did!"

"I wouldn't have if you hadn't told me I couldn't do it!"

"You exploded it?" Kratos said slowly, not looking amused. At all.

"I didn't know it would explode. I thought it would just…you know, die."

Kratos groaned and passed a hand in front of his eyes. "Very well, then. I'll find another."

"I am heading home," Presea said.

"Ah…um…me too!" Genis said quickly.

"Whatever. You chumps do what you want. I am off to meet some ladies." Zelos walked out the door. Genis followed him.

"You know, meeting more women won't help you get over him."

"G…get over who?"

Genis fixed him with a level stare, then walked off.

"I WASN'T LEERING, BY THE WAY!"

Yuan suddenly appeared behind him. "Meet me in the Triet Renegade Base."

"Gahhh! Don't do that, I said! It's creepy! Hey, where'd you go?"

The blue-haired Renegade was nowhere to be found. Zelos hook his head and decided to just spend the rest of the day sleeping. It might clear his mind a bit.

He did not leer at men. Especially not at Lloyd. He…admired them.

No! No! I do not! I'm just…sleep deprived.

Sleep deprived. That was it. It was all it was.

Decided and feeling much better, Zelos went home to sleep.

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A/N: Hehehe! I got a Tales of Legendia reference in here! *ahem* Anyhow. Please review. It'll make me happy.