Disclaimer: The show is the property of The WB and the lyrics at the beginning are by Nine Inch Nails. The only thing I own is the idea for the story.

Pairing: Brooke/Lucas with minor Naley

AN: This takes place about five years after season 4 and the THH graduation. For the sake of the story let's pretend that season 5 and 6 never happened, I know I do in general… Anyways, hope you enjoy!

-II-

Chapter 1 – The line begins to blur

The more I stay in here, the more it's not so clear
The more I stay in here, the more I disappear
As far as I have gone I knew what side I'm on
But now I'm not so sure, the line begins to blur...

-BL-

There comes a certain time in one person's life when you find yourself looking at your own life from outsiders' perspective and end up wondering where the hell did you go wrong? It just so happens that for Brooke that moment came while she was at an after party organized by the Mark Jacobs himself to celebrate his new fall/winter collection he presented that night. It was a strange place for a moment of self-reflection and contemplation of your own existence but she wasn't all that surprised. In fact, it seemed kind of appropriate.

She was standing by a group of gentlemen who were involved in a heated discussion that she wasn't paying much attention to, holding a half empty glass of champagne. It was too warm and it did nothing to cool down her body in this hot New York summer night.

Brooke could feel her short dress sticking to her body and not in a good way, making her desperate for an exit. Maybe she could hold it together for another hour before waving him from across the room, signaling that she's had enough and it was time for them to leave.

But for now she needed to stay and mingle or at least stand by the bar and smile, pretending she was having the time of her life. Which was usually the case, but tonight even faking it proved difficult to do. Perhaps she was just tired. After all there was a limit to how many after show parties a girl could attend in a week without feeling like she was about to pass out. But this was the Mark Jacobs after party and there was no time for rest.

God, since when has her life turned into an endless whirlwind of parties, fashion shows and false pleasantries? And what happened to it all being about making the clothes she loved and making your dreams come true? Guess it shared the same fate as those Mark Jacobs dresses after tonight's show. It sold out.

She was lost in her own thoughts that run rampant, making her head feel like a center of a raging twister, when something that one of the men standing beside her said caught her attention.

"I know, but don't you think that those first time authors get a lot of undeserved attention from the press as it is?" he asked a guy beside him.

"Yes, but they need it in order to develop and eventually succeed in the business. How will they ever get famous if bookstore owners store their book in some dusty corner in the back? All they could hope is that some poor soul will be brave enough to venture from the safe haven of some of the best known writers like Steinbeck, Hemingway, Salinger or Tolstoy and pick a first time author of a book he never heard of instead," the guy said sarcastically and added with a shrug "Like that's ever gonna happen."

"I have to agree with Kevin on that one," a woman standing beside the dark haired guy said "For example, around three months ago I accidentally found myself at the book signing of Lucas Scott, a first time author from a small town. His book is amazing, I read the whole thing in a day but if I haven't accidentally came there that day I'd probably never look it up on the shelves or read it for that matter."

"See, just like in fashion business, advertising and marketing are everything," Kevin said, looking pleased.

"And what about the talent?" the other guy asked. "Doesn't that count for something? I'm sure that the Scott guy had to have some talent if he got that far. I mean getting your book published is a pretty big thing."

Brooke sighed at the mention of his name before drinking up the rest of her champagne. Haley did mention it once, Lucas getting his book published, but she wasn't really paying much attention. Or at least she was trying not to. Because he was the part of her past and she didn't care what he did with his life now. Or so she told herself.

"Scott, like that Charlotte Bobcats player that retired after that terrible accident, what was his name-" the blonde standing next to Kevin said.

"Nathan Scott, yes they're brothers actually."

"God, he is so handsome. He could totally be a Kelvin Cline model."

"I know," another one agreed with a loud sigh as Brooke tried not to role her eyes.

"If Lucas is anything like him then I have to go to one of those book signings once," the blonde added as they both laughed.

Even though it was very worm in the room she trembled, feeling light-headed all of a sudden. Brooke was never a big fan of reading but there was that one afternoon a few months ago when she walked by a certain bookstore four times trying to work up the courage to go in before giving up and going to work instead. She came to her company an hour late and was greeted with a worried looking Millicent who told her that Victoria needed to see her right away.

"Oh believe me he is, and he's got that old school charm going for him that just knocks you of your feet. But don't bother, last I heard he was engaged to some tall blonde chick," said the brunette, thinking for a moment before adding "Maybe she's a model."

"Well, then I've got a shot," the other one said as the whole group burst into laughter.

Brooke decided she's finally had enough since this conversation made her want to throw up for multiple different reasons. One being that she couldn't believe she actually hang out with this sort of people now, since obviously they couldn't be more superficial even if they tried to. The second reason was Lucas Scott. He was writing books, being a person he always wanted to be and she was changing the world by being involved in a conversation about hot guys and models.

Somehow, she was certain that this was not what he had in mind when he wrote those words about her. Where was that brave, brilliant, fierce girl now?

Suddenly, it was hard to breathe and her eyes landed on Blake's back a few feet away. This room was becoming smaller and smaller by the second much like her own body and she was overwhelmed by the need to escape, run as far as she possibly could in these shoes. But how can you run away from yourself?

-BL-

Making her way through the crowd she finally reached Blake, breathless "We should go."

"Okay," he agreed, and she breathed a sigh of relief, glad he didn't ask her any questions about this sudden need for leaving, for once not telling her to take a cab and go home because he wanted to stay just a little bit longer.

"Are you alright?" he asked as he rubbed his hands up and down her arms to warm her up, genuine concern in his voice "You're trembling."

"I'm fine, just a little tired," she lied easily, grabbing his hand as she urged them through the crowd of people, making her way towards the exit, ready to face the paparazzi outside. As the doorman opened the front door and they stepped out it hit her like a ton of bricks.

It was almost as if these last couple of months she has been blindfolded and now finally someone has untied the fold and she opened her eyes for the first time in so long.

Everything was a mess, a big fucking mess but not the mess her white summer dress was after that night spent at the beach with him, or the way her hair looked when she'd walked out of Tric after a long night of dancing at 3 am with her friends, a smile plastered on her cherry-glossed lips. No, it was more like the kind of mess the main living room of her parents' house was the morning after they had a big fight that ended up with them telling her that her dad was leaving and that they were getting a divorce, with shattered vases and expensive china, and their family photos lying on the carpet, glass broken just like her heart.

That's precisely how she felt right now, her fingers intervened with Blake's, a fake smile in place, reminding them all on what they wanted to have, reminding her what she lost a long time ago. She lifted her head up to look at him, her deep hazel eyes locking with his brown ones, as she desperately tried to quiet that little voice in the back of her head that wondered why they weren't blue. It was a silly, useless wish but she was a fighter all her life and she'd be damned if she'd admit defeat now.

But the man standing next to her was a perfect reminder of how willing she was to settle for less rather than to fight, and every time she looked at him she had to suppress the urge to throw up right then and there.

These days she didn't know who that person in the mirror was that was staring back at her anymore but she knew it wasn't Brooke Davis. Because she would rather die than settle for anything, especially when it came to love.

Yes, she didn't know who that person was but she knew that somewhere deep down there was still that person she once knew. A fighter, not a conformist.

-BL-

An endless line of people called out her name, photographers snapped their cameras as she made her way down the red carpet and to her car, feeling more alone than ever. But somewhere deep down she also felt something she hasn't in so long, that tiny glimpse of hope that she could be that person again and that the mess she was in will be nothing but a reminder of the bad times once she finds her way. But right now she had another way to find, the one that would lead her out of the crowd that was surrounding her.

Finally, she reached the black limousine and got in, followed closely by Blake as he closed the door, silencing the cheers and screams of the people outside.

Her lips turned from a smile to a frown in a matter of seconds, when she was completely sure no one could see her anymore. Her eyes were cold, determined, void of any emotion as she turned to face him. She had to do this, it was now or never.

"Blake-"

"Yes honey?" he asked, looking at her with those dark brown eyes, oblivious to the turmoil in her head.

She avoided his eyes knowing she would lose her determination and choose to focus on the diamond ring on her hand instead as she said "I- I want you to move out, as soon as possible. I'd really appreciate it if you could move out your things tomorrow when I go to work since you do have the key, and please make sure you leave it in the hallway before you head out."

"But Brooke-" he started, completely dumbstruck by her words "You can't just- we're getting married in 2 months!" he said, stupefied "I love you-"

"Blake, you and I both know that this has nothing to do with love. So please, don't make this into something other than a mutual agreement of two grown up people that benefited from this relationship for quite some time, but now it's over," she said glancing at the small ring again and then finally looking up at his pleading eyes "And let's face it, there was a LOT more benefit there for you then for me-" she said pausing "-honey."

Blake Raines was a PR in a company managed by his father who owned a rather successful real estate business, not exactly the smartest guy ever but he could be charming every once in a while and she could get lonely. Plus he was photogenic so he looked good in newspaper standing next to her.

He was about to say something, but didn't get a chance because she picked up her pink blackberry as the first notes of Eta James's At last filled the spacey interior of the car.

"Hey tutor girl," she said, her voice sounding raspier than usual as she tried to just breathe and focus on something other than the man she's been living with for the past two months who was currently looking at her as if she'd gone mental.

"Brooke Davis- what an honor it is to hear from you," said a voice on the other side.

"Haha, very funny Hales," she replied, her lip curving into a smile.

"I'm not trying to be funny Davis. I almost gave up all hope of reaching you on the phone or in person."

"I've been busy lately," Brooke finally admitted, ashamed.

"And that Miss Davis is the understatement of the year," Haley said with a loud sigh.

"Yes, well that's the price you have to pay if you want to own all the shoes from Manolo Blahnik spring/summer collection or the latest Hermes bag, in all colors, of course."

"I wouldn't know about that," Haley replied trying to keep the sarcasm at the minimum level.

"Right, and why are you calling me this late in the evening again?"

"I'm getting married," she announced proudly.

"What?" Brooke asked, shocked, her voice raising an octave "You finally divorced hotshot? But I thought you two were finally getting back on track-"

"Brooke-"

"I mean Nate is doing better and he finally got back to basketball and stopped thinking only about himself"

"Brooke-"

"And you said that your sex life is better than e-"

"Brooke!"

"What?!"

"I'm getting married to Nathan."

Brooke was even more confused now "But aren't you two married already?"

"Yes." Haley confirmed with a sigh "But we decided to renew our wows."

"Oh."

"And Jamie's' birthday is coming up soon too so we thought it'd be-"

"That's so nice, in a sickeningly sweet kinda way."

"And that's exactly the kind of response I expected from people, so thank you for that," Haley said with a laugh.

"Any time, tutor mom."

"So, that means you're coming then?"

"What?" Brooke asked, feeling lost yet again.

"To the wedding. You were my maid of honor after all," Haley said "And you haven't seen Jamie since his second birthday."

"That's just low, playing the guilt card is not gonna work with me."

"How about the best friend card?" Haley asked with a laugh.

Her natural reaction was to say no. Sure, she wanted to be there for her friend but going back to Tree Hill was not an option for so many reasons that she didn't know where to even start. She looked back at Blake, thoughts of how wrong, how foreign her own life seemed right now filling her mind, and she realized that going to Tree Hill may be exactly what she needed right now. So she said…

"Alright I'm coming," hoping Haley didn't take her lack of enthusiasm the wrong way.

"Okay, so the wedding is this weekend but I hope to see you on Wednesday night at 8.30 sharp. That's when we're having a little get together at Tric."

"I think I can make it there tomorrow," Brooke said, trying not to panic. How could she leave work, even if it was just for a couple of days?

"That's great, it would be nice to see you earlier, we'll grab lunch or something. Oh, by the way-" Haley said, pausing, as if she was remembering something "Is Blake coming?"

"No, he's busy with work," Brooke answered automatically looking at her now already ex fiancé. She didn't want to explain that they kind of broke up to Haley over the phone. She was too tired to answer her questions right now or to spoil her happiness with her own problems. There would be plenty of time for explaining later.

"Too bad, I was hoping to finally meet him," she could hear her friend say on the other line.

"Maybe some other time."

"Yeah. I'll see you tomorrow Davis."

"Yeah, I hope so."

Brooke hung up not really sure what just happened yet. She closed her eyes trying to remember what her yoga instructor was explaining at last week's class about slow breathing and relieving stress. But in the end she concluded she didn't remember a thing cause she has spent 80 percent of the class on the phone, business related of course.

Opening her eyes, she knew she had her answer. Picking up her phone she pressed number 1 on her speed dial and waited. After two rings someone answered.

"Brooke, its one o'clock in the morning, I mean can't this-"

"Millicent please, I know it's late but I need you to do something for me."

"And what would that be?"

"Book me a plane ticket for Tree Hill, North Carolina, as soon as possible. Text me with the details after you're done."

"Tree Hill? But Brooke, you have a meeting tomorrow early at nine am, and Ralph Lauren is-"

"Cancel it all. A good friend of mine is renewing her wows this following weekend and-"

"Should I send a gift?" she asked.

"No, Millie I'm going there."

"Oh."

"I'll leave Catherine in charge, and you'll be there to help her out. But if something important comes up you can get me at my number, but only if it's a life or death kind of important, okay?"

"But-"

"Millicent, I'm not asking for your permission here." she said with a stern voice, the one she used only once before when talking to her friend and assistant, that time her collection got a bad review Millie hid from her.

"Okay I'll text you with the details later."

"And Millie- Please pack up Blake's stuff while I'm away and send it to his apartment please," she said and looked at her now already former boyfriend as the car stopped in front of a building on the Upper East Side.

"Brooke-"

"Goodbye Blake," she said opening the door for him to get out.

As she watched him leave she couldn't help but think how handsome he looked in his suit and the shirt half buttoned up, his hair in disarray after a long night. There was a time she'd follow him inside, unable to bare the feeling of loneliness that she was left with in an empty limo. Now she didn't mind being alone, she wasn't such a bad company.

And maybe she wasn't even alone.

With a sigh she leaned on the smooth leather seat of the limousine as the thought occurred to her. She hasn't even asked Haley who else was coming to the wedding. Was Rachel or Mouth coming? Would her bestest friend from high school days be there? Would Lucas?

She didn't know why but she hoped the answer to the last question was no. Because if the fast beating of her heart was any indication, she wasn't sure she could stand if the answer was yes.

Or rather, she wasn't sure her heart could.

-BL-

A/N: So this chapter was pretty Brooke centric but I promise that the other characters will make an appearance in the next one, most importantly Lucas of course. That is if you guys think there should be a next chapter. If not then I'll just leave it the way it is I guess.