I do not own these character's, just this fanfiction.
**Warning: This does mention abuse, verbal and physical. It does NOT go into detail, but it is strongly implied. You have been forewarned.**
Bella's POV
Bella scrambled through her overstuffed duffel bag and sighed in relief as her hand closed around her most prized possession. It was her diary, of sorts, she wrote in it everyday. She left no detail of her life out, she spared no emotion or memory. Sometimes, when her days were dark and there seemed to be no hope left within her, she would read back on the brighter days, the happier times when she was innocent enough to believe life was all rainbows and sunshine, as if nothing could ever go wrong. Oh, how that dream had been shattered into a million pieces. Everything had been fine until bella's mom, Renee, had married Phil. Phil had seemed like the perfect gentleman. He was charming, smart, affectionate towrds Renee, and protective, he was also the varsity coach at Bella's high school. He was the man every woman openly coveted and every man secretly envied. Unfortunately, it had been Renee who had caught his undivided attention.
They had wasted no time making things official. Their wedding was the same day as their 3 month anniversy, and it had been beautiful. Renee had seemed to glow with happiness as she practically floated down the aisle to Wagoner's march. Everyone in Forks had been in attendance, the local newspaper even said it was the wedding of the year, showering Phil and Renee with overated praise.
The year that had followed that "glorious wedding" was one of pure hell for Bella. From the outside, Phil, Renee, and Bella looked like the perfect family. That assumption was so off base that it actually made Bella chuckle darkly with bitter resentment and malice. You see, Phil wasn't as lovable once you actually saw the REAL phil. The real Phil was possessive, not protective. The real Phil was charming, but only with outsiders. The outsiders being anyone besides Renee and Bella, anyone who thought Phil was as great as he claimed to be. The real Phil was smart, but only at controlling and manipulating people and their circumstances to his liking. The real Phil was affectionate towards Renee, but only after he had degraded her to tears, humiliation, and ugly bruises that could be covered over with clothing.
People would always come up to Bella and tell her how lucky she was to have Phil as a dad. Phil...her dad... yeah, right! MENTAL SNORT. Real dad's didn't hit their daughter's, verbally or with a physical blow. Real dad's didn't tell their daughter's that they were worthless and that no one would ever want them, or that they were ugly beyond words. Real dad's didn't beat their wives and force their daughter to watch, threathening that the beatings would be more severe if she didn't. Real dad's didn't try to control their daughter's, atleast not to the extent that Phil does. No, phil was not her dad. He was a fake, an imposter, an actor that twisted the lie's so that they look like truth's. Bella hated him, with everything that was within her.
She had been brought up to believe that you were never supposed to hate anyone, ever. But things had changed, drastically. She wasn't that little naive girl anymore. She did hate. She was bitter, and hurting, and she felt isolated. Her best friends didn't even know about the abuse, no one knew. They did know that Bella had changed over the last year, but they just assumed it was a hormonal spell she was going through. I wish I could tell them. Would they look down on me? But Bella already knew the answer to that. Of course they wouldn't. They would hug her, cry with her, fuss over her, protect her, help her. But then Phil's dark, menacing voice floated through her head. IF YOU EVER TELL ANYONE, I SWEAR I'LL...Bella shut out his voice with a grimace before she could finish the thought. Bella feels as if she has been backed into a corner, between a rock and a hard place. She knew that she should tell someone, anyone, but she knows that Phil may just hurt her mom, or her, even worse.
The worse pill to swallow this last year was that her mom just allowed the abuse. She took it, and took it, and took it. Over, and over, over again. Bella had even stepped in and taken her mom's place in the abuse. Bella had finally had enough one night. She stepped between Phil and Renee and took the blows for her mom. And her mom had just stood there and watched. She hadn't moved to stop Phil, she hadn't moved to protect Bella, she didn't even cry out. She had just allowed it. When Phil had finished, he'd commanded Bella to clean everything up. After he had left the room, Bella had wiped blood from her mouth and looked up at her mom. Her mom was standing over Bella, looking down at her with empty, yet disapproving eyes. Renee's next words had broken Bella's wounded heart, and shattered her dreams of fleeing Phil. "You shouldn't have done that, Isabella. Clean yourself up and wipe that blood up off the floor. I don't want to see one speck left, or I might have to tell Phil that you disobeyed me, and he would be very angry. We don't want that, do we, Isabella?" Bella had stared up at her mother as if she had grown another pair of eyes. Bella couldn't find her voice, she had just stared up a Renee from her position on the cold kitchen floor. Renee walked out of the kitchen, leaving a broken-hearted Bella behind. That night, Bella realized her mom wasn't the woman she once was. She was a fluke now, just like Phil, always pretending like everything was ok, when their world was actually being torn apart.
"Bells? Are you in here?" Alices always cheerful voice floated up the stairs, wrapping around Bella like a security blanket, and giving her the strength to walk to the doorway. "Yeah, I'm up here, Ali. I'll be down in a sec.!" Thankfully, her voice sounded normal, which was suprising after were her train of thought had been just second's ago.
Bella mentally shook the abuse, rejection, out of her thought pattern, atleast till later. Right now she had some serious fun to have with her friends. The summer after Bella, Rose, and Ali turned 5, Ali's parents brought the girls up to a rather large cabin located in the dense forests of Washington. They had stayed for 2 weeks, swimming in the lake to the left of the house, and playing Marco Polo in the olympic sized pool. They had had a great time that summer, and they'd kept up the tradition every summer, eventually adding Jasper, Emmett, and Edward to the mix as well. They were all best friends, and they were extremely close.
It wasn't until the last few months that some of those feeling of Brotherly/sisterly love began to shift, and change into something unexpected. It all started when Em told Rose, in so few words, that he liked her. She had run to Alice and Bella partically squealing with delight. It hadn't taken them long to start going out. Now they were almost insperable. Em takes great delight, maybe alittle too much delight, in running over boys away from Rose. After Rose and Em had been going out for a few weeks, Alice finally told Edward how she truly feels about him, turns out, he feels the same about her. They are adorable together. The love radiating off of Ali is almost tangible, and you can't help but feel happy around the two of them.
"B? Are you comin'? The game is about to start!" Just his voice made Bella blush. Jasper. Her Jazz. He had moved to Washington from Alabama when he was 7 and Bella was just turning 6, but he'd never lost his husky, southern drawl. (I know that in the books he's from Texas, but I was born in Bama. I just wanted to show a little state loyalty. Ha.) It was...dreamy almost. He was the one she wanted. Sometimes she even thought he liked her in return but she could never be certain. They were close but she wasn't bold like Rose and Ali, she didn't want to be the one to make the first move, she wanted him too. Besides, her heart had been broken so many times the last year that she didn't know if she could stand anymore rejection or adding insult to injury. She'd been in love with him for years, but neither Ali nor Rose knew it was him. They knew she liked someone, but they weren't sure who. They'd been questioning her for months. But with everything that had been going on at home, Bella felt guilty just thinking about starting a relationship while her mom was at home being beaten and broken. The cold thought brought her back to reality. "I'm coming, Jazz!"
As Bella descended the stairs, she paused to look at her group of best friends. They were huddled, indian style, on the floor in a circle. There was a space saved beside Jazz. He saw me staring a looked up at me and gave me a heartbreaking smile that did something funny to my heart. I smiled back, a real smile. I hadn't smiled in earnest in...months. It felt foreign on my face, but not uncomfortable. The rest of my friends saw Jazz smiling and they all looked up too. Ed and Em smirked, Ali and Rose glanced back and forth between Jasper and I, and then realization seemed to dawn on their faces, their smiles were from ear to ear.
"Bells! Ok, we can play now!" Ali was almost jumping with excitement. Everyone laughed, but I stayed frozen at the bottom of the stairs. And then, suddenly, my dam broke. The tears that I'd been trying to fight and hide began to cloud my vision, making it hard to see. Rose saw me and quickly stopped laughing. A look of worry and concern took over her face. "Bella! What is it? Are you ok?" Everyone immediately turned to look at me, Rose's question mirrored in their eyes as well. Their concern caused a strange noise to escape my lips, it was a cross over between a hysterical laugh, and a sob. "Bells? What is it?" They were on their feet now, crowding around me, enveloping me in hugs.
Then it all came to me. I knew what I was about to do may make Phil hate me more, but I knew what was right, and I had to do it. I was going to do it. I drew in a shaky, uneven breath. With tears rolling down my cheeks, I said the words I had held back for so, so long. Far too long. "We have to talk. Please, I need your help. I don't know what to do anymore." The tears were coming faster now.
"What is it, Bells? We're here for you. What's wrong?" It was Jasper. He was the closest one standing to me, and he wrapped a protective arm around me shoulders, drawing me to him.
So, what do you think? Yes? No? Maybe?
Please review!! It would help me see how I want this story to go.
Thanks!
-Kennedy
P.S. If you'd like to, check out my other stories. I have two other Twilight stories that are not done yet, but will be updated soon, and one story called 'A Moments Reprieve'. It's derived from The Mortal instruments series.