Disclaimer: Not mine. Not making anything. I'm not returning them until I'm damn good and ready! This is for Sasha's Muscle challenge on RW. My apologies in advance, since this hasn't been beta'd. All mistakes are mine. Hope you like!

Another Day, Another Disaster

"Stephanie, please! Why can't you just quit that horrible job, settle down with Joseph and start a family? You're not getting any younger, and at this rate, you'll be killed before you even walk down the aisle!" Helen Plum pleaded to her youngest daughter as she automatically set the chicken salad and rolls onto the table that Steph had had Tank stop at Giovinchinni's for on her way over.

Stephanie Plum, the Bombshell Bounty Hunter, sighed as her head dropped into her hands, her elbows propped on the table. She had narrowly escaped another catastrophic explosion this morning, and didn't feel up to having to defend herself so early in her day. In fact, she'd barely had time to finish her second Boston Crème before all hell broke loose. The father of one of her skips, Harold Kowalski, had set off a pipe bomb underneath her beautiful new (to her) silver Honda CRV, adding a small can of gasoline and some emergency flares to the mix. The resulting explosion not only decimated her vehicle, but Lula's newly detailed fire engine-red Firebird, which was parked behind her, and Mrs. Baggett's faded Datsun hatchback, which was parked in front of her. Other casualties of the blast were the windows of Vincent Plum Bail Bonds, in front of where all three cars had been parked, and those of the bookstore that sat next to the Bonds office. Fortunately, no one had been seriously hurt, other than a few superficial cuts from flying glass and ringing eardrums. Unfortunately Steph had suffered the brunt of those injuries, along with a pounding headache, since she had been standing right in front of the windows when they shattered from the force of the blast.

She'd been treated at the scene, then taken down to the station to give her statement. Tank, who had shown up at the scene to check on her in Ranger's absence, had waited until she was finished and given her a ride to her parents' house so she could reassure her family she was alive and well. She almost wished she'd forgone that pleasure, since her mother's constant harping about her job was making her head ache even more than the effects of the blast. She'd long ago given up trying to make her mother understand that marrying Joe wasn't an option; heck even being a couple was out.

Several weeks ago, after another one of their many loud and much talked-about screaming matches, they finally sat down and talked, really talked, about where they saw their lives heading. It had been an enlightening conversation for the both of them. Surprisingly, there had been no screaming, no yelling, no accusations of cheating or one leading the other on. For once, Joe hadn't brought up Steph's working relationship with Ranger and his men, and she never retaliated with any cracks about his 'closeness' with Terri Gilman. They'd eventually stood up, shook hands, and parted as friends. Not even breakup sex, though not through lack of trying on Joe's part. She dodged his groping hands and skipped out his front door, suddenly feeling like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. She felt free for the first time in her life.

Now as she listened to her mother whine and cajole, she felt her left eye begin to twitch. She really needed to escape before her head split. Too bad she had to stick around until she could talk her mother out of keys to the Buick. That ugly, powder-blue gas-guzzling monstrosity that she'd be forced to drive until her insurance check came through for the CRV was her only means of transportation; at least, that she would accept. Never mind that Tank had offered her one of the Broncos from the endless supply of vehicles parked in the underground garage at Rangeman. No way was Steph going to allow anything to happen to another one of Ranger's cars on her account!

She sighed, lifting her head and looking at her mother's face. "Mom." Her voice was low, trying not to make the pounding in her head any worse by sudden movements or loud noises. Helen Plum continued to rant worriedly as if Steph had never spoken, crossing herself repeatedly as she extolled the virtues of becoming a 'Burg wife and mother who never had to worry about stalkers or exploding cars.

Steph closed her eyes and leaned her head back, crossing her hands over her stomach as she sprawled back in the chair. "Mom." A little louder this time, hoping her mother would stop the incessant guilt trip she was trying to lay on her. Helen didn't even blink.

"Mom…mom…mom!" The last she nearly shouted, and felt pain slice through her head. She wearily got up and headed to the cabinet above the sink where the Tylenol had recently been relocated, seeing out the corner of her eye her mothers' jaw drop at Steph's raised voice.

"Stephanie Michelle Plum! You will not raise your voice to me, young lady! I'm still your mother, and you will treat me with the respect I deserve!" Her mother's face was flushed pink in anger, and Steph stifled another sigh. She swallowed two caplets of the pain killer and chased them down with a glass of water, setting the empty glass in the sink before turning around to face her mother.

"Mom, why do you insist that I get married again? I tried that before, remember how that worked out? As for kids, I don't think I even want kids. Certainly not now, and maybe never." As many times as they'd had this conversation, she couldn't help but be exasperated at the consistency of her mother's topic of choice, and it was clearly heard in her tone of voice.

"Because I want you to be happy! Look at Valerie; she's settled and happy with Albert and the girls, and she never has anyone threatening her! Stella Tucci, who was three years behind you in school is married and has six children! She never has to roll in garbage! And even Linda Giovinchinni only works part-time at her family's deli, and that's just because her mother needed her gallbladder out." Her mother was clearly running out of fuel; Steph suspected she'd be pulling out the bottle of Four Roses that was stashed in the cupboard behind the olive oil any moment now.

"Why is it so important to you that I become just like Val? Why can't you accept me as I am? Me!" Steph couldn't hold back the irritation in her voice. She was so tired of being compared to her perfect older sister. She shivered at the prospect of staying home changing dirty diapers and picking up after a man who thought her being barefoot and pregnant was the perfect life.

Her mother stopped and stared at her, a look of disapproval on her face. "Because you belong to the 'Burg, Stephanie! It's your station in life to become a proper wife and mother. That's how you were raised; to be like everyone else!"

Steph snorted. "The worst thing I can be is the same as everybody else. I hate that you expect me to be just another 'Burg clone. I don't want to spend my life living through others when I could be living it myself!" Nope, not happening. She'd spent the past eight years trying to break free of the 'Burg, and she'd be damned if she would settle down to that existence. She needed to fly!

The older woman gaped at her, momentarily at a loss for words. "How can you say that? What's wrong with becoming a wife and mother? It's how you become a woman Stephanie! Not running around chasing after criminals and getting your cars blown up. And certainly not hanging around with thugs and prostitutes!"

What the…Steph's eyes narrowed.

"Just what do you mean by that, mom? Lula's a file clerk, and she helps me with my skips. She's my friend." She tried to rein in her temper, keeping her voice even and blinking back the tears of anger that threatened. "And Ranger and his guys are not thugs! Ranger's my best friend, and he keeps me safe. Those men of his are also my friends, and they'd die before they'd let anything happen to me! You know that!"

Her mother shook her head. "But don't you see, Stephanie? That life isn't safe! Look how many times you've had to have those men rescue you! How many times you've almost been killed! If you married and had children, you wouldn't have to worry about your car blowing up, or some stalker threatening you! You'd be home safe, and I wouldn't have to explain to everyone why my daughter gets into so much trouble!" She could see her mother was very close to tears, frustration and fear clearly evident on her face.

Steph swallowed a lump that suddenly rose up in her throat. Her headache hadn't abated one bit, and she began to massage her temples. She looked up at her mother's face, feeling somewhat guilty for the fear she saw, but steeling her resolve at that last comment.

"Why do you feel like you need to explain, Mom? It's none of anyone's business how I decide to live my life. And it's not your responsibility to feed their need to know. Tell them to mind their own lives, and stay out of mine! Yeesh!" Her head was pounding so hard she was ready to cut it off herself. If she could just get the keys to the Buick and head back to her apartment…

Her mother was frowning at her, not that it affected Steph much. She'd given her that look so many times in the past 30-odd years that it didn't have the same affect any more. She used it herself on occasion, not that it was any more effective to those she chose to use it on.

"Stephanie, you need to think about what's best for you. You can't keep risking your life like this. It's not a proper job for you to be doing. The Morellis aren't going to accept this behavior from you any more. Even now it's debatable if they'll countenance a marriage between you and Joseph." She sighed and sat down at the table, stirring the chicken salad absentmindedly.

Steph sat down across from her and let out a sigh. "Mom, Joe and I are never going to get back together. It's over, finished. I don't love him enough to change myself into who he needs, and he doesn't love me enough to accept me as I am. I don't want the 'Burg way of life. It suits you and Val. Stella and Linda too. It won't make me happy, though. It never did. My life now, crazy as it is, is what's best for me. Please understand that."

The disappointed sigh she heard her mother expel was nothing new. Along with the frowning looks, they only made her want to do something spectacular that would make her mother proud. To finally see approval or pride there. The looks she only bestowed upon her sister.

She decided this conversation had gone on long enough. She needed to go home and sleep, and try to put the days events behind her. "Mom, I need to go home. Can I borrow the Buick? It's gonna be a while before I can get another car." She rubbed her temples again, trying to ease the pain a little. The light was beginning to hurt her eyes, and if she waited much longer, she wouldn't be able to see well enough to drive. No way could she stay here all day with this headache.

Her mother got up and got the keys out of the kitchen drawer underneath the phone, handing them to her wordlessly. Steph got up from the table, mumbling a thank you and shuffled out the door. She couldn't wait to stand under her shower and wash away the grime of the morning, then fall into bed and sleep.

She pulled the Buick out of the garage and pointed it towards her apartment, the bright sun causing her to wince as another shaft of pain lanced through her skull. Just a few more minutes and she'd be home.

As she turned the corner and pulled out onto Hamilton, another shaft of pain shot through her head, blinding her to the speeding truck that roared towards her. She wasn't aware of the danger until she heard the sickening crunch of metal and felt the door pinning her in her seat, the force throwing her upper body violently sideways and cracking her head painfully against the big steering wheel.

Then everything went black.

Tbc?

Word count without title & disclaimer: 2127