He's gone…

We had been together for so long, and now…

Gone.

Such a strange word… It seems so foreign to my mouth… Edward's gone… That just seems so much worse.

All that I can seem to do is cry, and sometimes it's easier for me just to have no feeling at all… I seem to have blocked everyone out of my life… I seemed to have pushed everyone away…

Isn't it strange, that in times like these the first people you push away…

Are the ones you need the most.

I'm not as stupid as everyone thinks I am though. I know he'll never come back… Once Edward Cullen has made a vow, I know that he's bound to keep it…

So why do I still keep the hope that someday he'll come back?

How is it, that I still believe that his vow to me would someday pop into his head, forcing him to come back into my arms.

But would my arms be open to him?

So much pain he caused in these past months being so far away… How do I know that I want him to be with me?

Because this pain in my chest is telling me that I can't ever want him again.

But I know deep down that I need him so much…