How can I even try to explain the cocktail of emotions that stirred in my stomach the moment my eyes met her gaze?

I could hear from across the hall the muffled sobs she was trying to supress, I can still imagine her, clutching onto her pillow like a lost soul in pain. Her slender figure, vulnerable and fragile. How I longed to embrace her and tell her everything would work out... How I longed to shed those unwanted tears...

I was still with Ren, although my feelings had considerably evolved since the last time we met. The spark he had woken up in me had died out through the weeks of separation, to be replaced by a strong feeling of irritation each time he wanted to get closer.

I remember sitting at the table I made for Hachi, looking outside the window for an answer. The strawberry glass was as close as I'd allow myself to get, although my lusting feelings hadn't stopped growing for the past months... She had hit me right in the heart, with her childish attitude which I would normally have found flabbergastingly annoying. But hey, it was Hachi. She could lighten up your day with her presence.

So there I was, about to enter my room, when I heard her sobs invading the apartment. The pain I felt was inexorably horrible. I felt a sudden coldness rush through my spine as my lungs were fighting for air. Tears had welled up in my eyes and I quickly wiped them off with my jacket. I had an internal dilemma that would not go away...

At night, I couldn't help but dream about her sweaty figure screaming my name, I cannot count the times I tried to stop thinking about her, the times I rushed to Rens house for a quick fling that would leave me more confused.

The need of protecting Hachi had overcome my previous need of seeing Ren, her smile brought a heart-warming sensation Rens didn't. But I couldn't tell her, she was heart-broken with all that Nobu and Takumi crap. I didn't want to force my presence on her, she was so easily influenced it was unnerving.

Then, as if spoken from a distant world, she lightly said my name. I remember holding the doorknob so hard my fingers hurt. I didn't want to see her crying. My world would crash down in front of her. Who knew what I was capable of; with her so defenseless?

"Why... I don't understand..." I didn't understand either at that moment, why was I incapable of going and comfort her? Was it because seeing her in that state would only increase my need of her being?

"It can't be..." She was muttering loudly, something she did when she thought she was alone. I was thinking about eavesdropping when she opened the door. What an embarrassing moment that was. I felt like a child being caught stealing candy. Of course, Hachi was much sweeter than any candy out there.

"Nana?!" She asked surprised. Well, who wouldn't be. I could feel this crimson blush crawling along my face, which immediately made me look at the floor.

"Uhm, well, I heard you..." God, that was a lame comeback. My fingers twitched, I desperately wanted to get out of this awkward situation.

"What did you hear?" She asked rather nervous. Was she trying to hide something from me? I raised my head only to notice her puffy eyes. My hand instinctively reached to caress her face wet with crystal tears. She jumped slightly at my action. I couldn't help but laugh.

"I guess I'm going to have to do that more often so you won't jump when I get a little more intimate." My bravado had launched this pervert line at her. I couldn't help but feel a tang of guilt. She didn't want me, what was I doing, hitting on her?

"What did you say Nana?" I could see the shock filling her eyes. Way to go. She had unconsciously moved farther away, pinning herself against the wall.

My hidden lust erupted from nowhere and I quickly found myself fighting my hormones as my body inched closer to hers. Why resist such a temptation?

"I was asking, why were you crying?" My left-hand had slid down to her hip, carving in my mind the image of her body. We were dangerously close. I could scent her perfume, her quickened breathing was a whisper in my ears. That girl had me falling head over heels for her.

"Tell me Hachi, so I can beat the hell out of the miserable boy who hurt your feelings." I could sense her moving underneath me, so I reluctantly moved aside to free her from my imposing posture. I quickly glanced at her but felt drawn to her completely innocent action. She bit her lip, staring at the ceiling. She left me at a loss for words. She was astoundingly beautiful.

"What if it isn't a boy?" She defiantly looked at me. Searching for an answer in my eyes.

"Well, I'm still going to beat the crap out of her." I offered a smile. That was an interesting comeback. So Hachi has the hots for a girl?

She edged forward, reducing the space between our faces. Her right hand was circling my waist; pulling me closer. Her eyes were closed, as if absorbing this moment. Her left hand played with my hair nervously. I couldn't help but feel an explosive hotness rising up in my body, I needed to touch her.

She looked directly into my eyes as her hand slid underneath my shirt. A loud gasp escaped my mouth. A devilish smile stuck on her face; she slowly caressed my stomach.

"Are you really going to beat the crap out of her?" She asked innocently. Unconsciously, she had licked her lips, and my ardent body could take no more. I closed the gap between our bodies. The sudden hotness must have surprised her, but she seemed to cope with it.

"No." There was a sparkle jumping up and down through my spine, I'm sure Hachi felt it too. It was the kind of thing you only feel when the two of you really want it badly. Or maybe my lust was so bad it counted as Hachi's too.

"Good, so I'll be able to do something I always wanted to do." She bit the side of my neck, and slowly kissed her way to my chin.

"I'm not going to let you do whatever you want." I moved away form her embrace, and her blushed face was the sign I was waiting for. I took her hand and led the way to my room. She fell onto the bed and I somehow managed to fall on her. I contemplated her, asking the gods above how such beauty could exist.

"You are breath-taking." She said slowly. Her head tilted slightly to the side, while her lips parted. I closed my eyes, realizing this was just a mistake.

"I don't want you to regret this." I needed to touch her and to feel her and to see her fulfilled face of pleasure. But I never wanted to force it on her.

"I know I won't." Her hands forcefully dug into my hair and pulled me closer to her. The lust was emancipating from both our bodies, while her tongue dashed out to meet mine. She unsettled me at first with her actions; I wasn't sure if I should stop her and tell her to think about it. I stared into the pool of her eyes, and I knew I didn't mind making mistakes every now and then.