Whatever It Is

Chapter 1

Here we go again!

Ok, this one starts in Season 3, during TOW Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister…I think the episode title pretty much explains which episode it is, ha. I don't think I've seen this story done before…It starts at Joey's party, so lines from there are not mine, I'm just using it to set up the rest of this chapter. Oh, and I used transcripts from friendscafe, so I won't take credit for that. Oh, and the characters aren't mine, either. Ok…

_._._._._._

"Hey, Joey, where are the jello shots?" Monica asked.

"I don't know, Chandler is supposed to be passin' 'em around," Joey looked around the apartment, finally spotting Chandler, nearly-empty tray of shots in hand, attempting to share one with their ceramic dog. "Chandler!"

"Hello-dillio!" he greeted the rest of the group, making it obvious where the jello shots had gone.

"Oh, somebody's feeling better!" Ross quipped.

"Stick out your tongue," Monica practically ordered.

"Take off your shirt!" Chandler shot back, but gave in to her request seconds later, revealing a dark green tongue.

"Oh my!"

"Oh my god! How many of these did you have?" Joey asked. "These are pure vodka!"

"Yep! Jello just like Mom used to make!"

_._._._._._

Less than an hour later, after the arrival of Joey's seven sisters, Chandler had somehow managed to make out with nearly half of the room, causing the party to start dwindling down.

"Hey, Mon," he walked up behind Monica, who was sitting on a barstool, talking to Gunther, who moved away at Chandler's arrival. He felt no need to be the next victim of whatever game Chandler was playing, obviously seeing how many people's throats he could stick his tongue down for the night. "Get drunk with me! Everyone here is wa-ay too sober."

"Well, that's because someone drank all of the shots," she smiled, patting his chest.

"Then, how 'bout we go 'cross the hall and get the rest from your refrigerator," he slurred the last few words as he grabbed her hand, attempting to pull her up, but stumbling backwards in his drunken state.

"No, I think you drank them all, Chandler," she kept hold of his hand, not letting him fall.

"Hey," he stood back up straight. "Don't fraternize me, Mon," he looked at her, as if replaying the words in his head.

"Don't patronize you?" she offered.

"Yea, don't patronize me, Mon," he repeated. "I heard Joey say there's more. C'mon," he pulled at her hand again.

"Fine, but they're not for you, they're for everyone else to catch up with you," she gave in, following him out the door.

Monica fumbled through her purse for her keys, and Chandler placed one hand on top of the doorframe, steadying himself, perhaps a bit too closely to Monica. "What are ya doin' there, drunky?" Monica turned to face him, realizing how close he was standing.

"Waiting for you to unlock a door that is never locked," he stated impatiently.

"I, um, have my keys," she held them up. "Just waiting for you to move so you don't fall in when I open the door," she smiled.

"You have a really pretty smile," he whispered, removing his hand from the door and placing it on her cheek.

"Chand-" Monica started, realizing where it was going. He had already attempted to make out with Rachel, Ross, and at least four out of seven of Joey's sisters. However, her realization came too late, as he cut her off, and she felt his lips against hers. For a few seconds, she kissed back; she hadn't been that fervently in a long time. But remembering that it was Chandler, that he was extremely drunk, and still hung up on Janice, Monica moved to push him away. "Chandler," she mumbled against his lips.

"Just a couple more seconds, Mon," he whispered back, but they both jumped apart when the door to Joey and Chandler's apartment opened.

"Better you than me," Gunther said to Monica, closing the door. "And better her than Rachel," he added, walking towards the stairs.

"Jello shots," Chandler took Monica's keys from her hands, attempting to unlock her door. When unsuccessful, Monica took the keys back. "There you go, fraternizing me again," he smiled, this time attempting a joke, and getting the look from Monica he often got after making a joke, which was what he had hoped for. It was her look for him and him alone.

"You, mister, are cut off," she shut the door behind them, walking over to the refrigerator. "These are for everyone else," she turned around, tray in hand, to find Chandler now slumped in the chair at the kitchen table closest to the refrigerator, his happy demeanor suddenly gone. "What's wrong?" she set the tray down.

"Nothing, it's just," he sighed, looking down. "You make me feel hopeless."

"What?" Monica folded her arms, not sure what his drunken mind had intended that to mean, but unhappy nonetheless.

"No-no-no," he jumped up next to her. "Not like that!" he sighed, leaning back against the table. "I mean, you're…amazing. You are gorgeous, and smart, and talented, and amazing, and…look at you right now. You don't have a boyfriend, your job sucks-"

"Good job digging that hole deeper, Bing!"

"I'm not done yet," he explained. "I mean, look at how great you are, and all that you don't have right now, and then," he exaggeratedly motioned to himself. "Look at me. If you don't get any of that, there is no way in hell I will! I am no where near as great as you are," he looked down, not at her.

"At least you have a 'grown up' job?" she offered.

"That I hate," he scoffed. "At least you get to wear big, fake boobies at your job?" he offered back, causing her to laugh and hit him playfully.

"You don't give yourself enough credit," Monica leaned on the table beside him. "However, in your attempt at flattery, you just depressed me," she grabbed two shots, handing him one, and taking one herself. "Here's to us!"

_._._._._._

"Monica? Chandler?"

Rachel's voice cut into Monica's sleep. She sat up slowly, placing a hand on her head, a hangover starting to set in already, but soon decided against sitting up as she lay back down. Disoriented as to where she was sleeping, she finally realized she was in Chandler's room. Eyes wide, she looked down, realizing that she was fully clothed and under his blanket, and he was fully clothed and above his blanket. Looking at the time, 4 AM, and then at Chandler's half-open bedroom door, she realized that Rachel had probably assumed both she and Chandler were still gone, but now heard her in Joey's room.

"Hey," she whispered, nudging Chandler, who made a few noises in his sleep and moved towards her. "Chandler," she tried again.

"Mmm."

"Chandler," she whispered again, and his time his eyes flew open wide, realizing it was Monica in bed with him.

"Mon? Why? What the hell happened?"

"I was hoping you could answer that," she laughed. "I don't remember much after jello shots at my apartment."

"I…probably only remember half of the night up until that point," he smiled at her apologetically.

"I think they're looking for us," she continued to whisper. "But, I thought that this," she motioned between them, referring to their fully dressed state, "looks a whole lot less compromising than us walking out of your room together."

Chandler laughed, rubbing his eyes, "God, how much did we drink?" He rolled closer to Monica again, burying his face in the pillow beside her.

"Rach!" Joey yelled from the door. "They're here!" he yelled again, oblivious to the two groans the first shout had elicited. "No, not he, they!"

To be continued….

Please review…they make me smile! And my puppy literally just puked on my flip-flops, and I had to throw them away, and although it sounds amusing…yea, not so much…so, I could use a smile. Anyway, review! Thanks :)