Uncle Lester's Princess

By jerseygirlinoxford (sue)

This is a follow up to Daddy's Little Girl. And this is written for Kym because she needs a little happy right now. This is a Gabby story.

Part One

Lester was stuck on monitors again. There was some kind of flu bug that was going through the Merry Men like shit through a goose. Rangeman was seriously short staffed at the moment. Ranger and Stephanie had been working extra shifts to fill in the gaps. He overheard them talking in the kitchen. "It's either Grandma Mazur, or we don't go," Stephanie groaned.

"No way, Babe. She made a point to show Gabby all the Disney porn. I'm afraid of what she's going to teach our daughter next," Ranger insisted. Lester smiled as he remembered Ranger's adventures in babysitting last week. Gabby certainly put him through the mill. Steph came out of the kitchen sniffling with tears in her eyes. Shit, he thought. Steph was really looking forward to tonight. She and Ranger didn't get out alone that much anymore. Hell….he could handle Gabby for a few hours. He was just planning on watching TV tonight anyway. He had to cover another shift tomorrow. He nudged Junior to keep on eye on the monitors and approached Steph. Ranger was right behind her.

"Uh….hey," Lester began, "I can watch Gabby for you tonight." He looked at their confused expressions.

"You want to watch, Gabby?" Steph asked in disbelief. Lester nodded.

"Sure. I'm her favorite Uncle," he replied with a huge grin. "Look…I know you guys were really looking forward to going out tonight. Plus, you've been working all those extra shifts. We'll be alright. We'll just watch TV or some Ranger-approved Disney movies. I mean…it's only for a few hours…how hard can it be?" Ranger and Stephanie exchanged smiles. "I know Ella's sick, but she's still in the building incase I need her."

"Why don't you ask Kym to come over?" Steph offered. "You know that Gabby loves her. She can help you." Lester looked sheepish. "What did you do?" He sighed and ran a hand through his short and spiky hair.

"Kym wants to take a break. She thinks I'm immature and don't take anything seriously," Lester explained. He was really taking their break up hard.

"Yeah….I hear she's busy tonight anyway," Junior chimed in. "She's got a date with the new resident from the ER." Lester flipped him the bird. Kym was an ER nurse at St. Francis. Lester met her through one of the many emergency trips there for Stephanie. He really thought she was the one. Okay…so maybe farting the Star Spangled Banner was a little immature but that took major skill. There are a lot of high notes in that song. Shit…who was he trying to kid. The only people who appreciated his flatulent skills were the guys. Well….and Gabby. He really impressed her when he lit a fart. Steph wasn't too pleased when she found out about that one.

"We'll be fine. I'll take her to McDonalds for dinner. Then, we can come back to my place and watch TV or something," Lester assured them. That and he didn't want to be alone. Too much time on his hands would lead to thinking about Kym….and that sexy little Cocopelli tattoo on her hip. Okay….STOP! God, he missed her. Steph gave him a hug and kissed his cheek.

"Thank you so much, Lester. Gabby's going to be thrilled."

"I better not come home to find that her vocabulary was expanded again, Santos," Ranger warned. Yeah…like she didn't learn enough from her own father, Lester thought. "And make sure you hide all the porn!" Ranger headed into his office. Stephanie stayed behind.

"Gabby will be fine with you," she reassured him. "And don't give up on Kym, Lester. You're a great guy….kind, loyal, fun….but sometimes a girl doesn't always want to feel like she's babysitting when she's with her boyfriend. Understand?" Lester nodded. Yeah…and maybe they don't want their breasts to be called hooters all the time either. "We'll bring Gabby down when we leave. She's going to be so excited."

Lester went through his magazines and videos before Gabby arrived. Damn. He didn't realize how much porn he had laying around. He started to throw the stack of magazines in the trash but changed his mind. If Kym didn't take him back, he was going to need these. BANG BANG BANG!! Gabby.

"Open up Uncle Lester!" He smiled.

"Who's there? I don't see anybody through the peep hole," Lester teased her.

"It's me, Uncle Lester!"

"Me who?"

"Mommy…Uncle Lester is acting like a dick. Doesn't he love me no more?" What? Lester threw the door open. Ranger was staring wide-eyed at his daughter. Stephanie knelt down.

"Gabby, dick is not a nice word. And of course, Uncle Lester loves you. He was just teasing you," Stephanie told her gently.

"But Uncle Tank, and Uncle Lester, and Daddy, and Ram, and Hal……" The veins on Ranger's neck became distended.

"I know they all use bad words, but that doesn't mean you can. It's not nice…okay?" Stephanie explained. Lester picked her up.

"I still love you, Princess," he said and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "You got a kiss for me?" She smacked him on the lips. Gabby seemed to be a little more quiet than usual. "Is she okay?" Steph frowned.

"I think she might be coming down with something. She feels warm but her temperature is normal. Maybe we should stay home." Steph bit her lower lip. Ranger sighed.

"She'll be fine, Babe. Lester can call us for any problems," Ranger insisted.

"Don't worry Steph. We'll be fine. We 're going to McDonalds, Princess."

"Yea! McDonalds!" It was the first spark of the true Gabby. "Can I get a Happy Meal, Uncle Lester? And a milkshake?"

"You can have whatever you want, Princess." He turned to Stephanie and Ranger. "Get outta here and have some fun. Say goodbye to Mommy and Daddy." Gabby gave each of them a hug and a kiss.

"Bye Mommy. Bye Daddy. I love you." Ranger pulled Steph to the elevator and Lester took Gabby inside. "Are we gonna see Kymme tonight, Uncle Lester?" Shit! He only wished.

"No. It's just going to be you and me." He sat her on the couch. "I'll put on the Cartoon Network for you. I'm going to change my clothes, and then we'll go to McDonalds…okay?" Her face lit up like a Christmas tree. Steph had her dressed in a Hello Kitty long sleeve tee shirt and jeans. She had all her hair pulled up to the top of her head in this little waterfall-like pony tail. Hello Kitty. That reminded him of the Siamese cat tattoo Kym had on her left shoulder. Gabby's smiling face brought him back to reality.

"Yea! McDonalds! Uncle Lester?"

"Yeah?"

"Can we go to the McDonalds with the slide?" Yeah…he liked that slide, too.

"Sure, Princess. I'll take you on the slide. Be right back." He quickly changed into jeans, a Henley, and sneakers. He came back out to the living room but didn't see Gabby. "Gabby?" He looked over the counter and almost shit himself. She had one of his magazines.

"Uncle Lester!" she exclaimed in surprise. "These ladies gots no clothes on! Look at all these boobies!" Oh shit! Double shit! Ranger's-gonna-rip-off-my-dick shit! He left the stack of porn magazines on the counter. He grabbed the magazine out of her little hands.

"Uh….yeah. They are…um…Uncle Bobby's. Uh…his medical magazines. You know…because Uncle Bobby does…um…medical stuff," he stammered. Please buy that explanation.

"Okay." Thank Christ! He put the stack on top of the fridge.

"Are you ready to go?" She nodded.

"But I gots to go pee-pee first."

"Oh….okay." He took her little hand and led her to the bathroom. "Can you…uh…do this by yourself, Princess." Please say yes.

"You have to help me with my pants, Uncle Lester, but Mommy showed me how to wipe my 'gina." Lester cringed. Although 'ginas were his favorite subject, it didn't sound right coming out of the mouth of a little girl. He pulled down her jeans and sat her on the toilet. It was sort of creepy actually. Not taking care of a little girl, but taking care of a little girl with her pants down and talking about 'ginas.

"I'll stand out here. Let me know when you're done…okay?"

"Okay Uncle Lester." Damn. He felt like a child molester. He forgot about this part. Well at least this is only #1. He smiled remembering how Ranger got stuck with #2. And how the Hulk pissed all over himself as Ranger threw him out of the bathroom. "I'm all done!" He lowered her to the floor and pulled her up her jeans.

"Okay, Princess, let's go." She looked up at him and gave him her mega-watt smile.

"I love you, Uncle Lester." They made fun of Ranger because Gabby had him wrapped around her little finger. He didn't want to admit it, but he, too, was under Gabby's spell.

"I love you, too, Princess."

Lester took Gabby to the McDonalds on Hamilton. It was the first McDonalds in Trenton, and the only one to have the play area with all the old McDonalds characters: Ronald himself, The Hamburgler, Mayor McCheese, the Grimace, and the Fry Guy. It was a typical busy Saturday night. Those getting out of 5 o'clock mass were lined up in the drive thru lane. Others wanting to grab a quick dinner before the movies or other evening activities were waiting on line inside. Lester parked the SUV and helped Gabby out of her booster seat. He took her by the hand and led her inside.

"Kymme!" Gabby called out. Lester whirled around to see a tall girl with straight brown hair wearing scrubs heading for the other exit. Upon hearing her name, she turned around. It was Kym. Lester's heart pounded heavy in his chest. He watched as she smiled when she realized it was Gabby that called to her. Gabby ran over, and Kym picked her up. Gabby gave her a big kiss and hug. "Hi, Kymme! I missed you! Uncle Lester's getting me McDonalds."

"I missed you, too, Gabs." Lester walked over to them. "Hello, Lester." Lester gave her his best smile.

"Hi, Kym." He checked out her scrubs. "You working tonight?" God, he hoped so. That would mean the rumors about her and the ER resident were wrong. She nodded and then put Gabby back down.

"Yeah. I got a call about an hour ago. We're short staffed with this virus that's going around. So, I cancelled my plans for tonight and agreed to pick up an extra shift," she explained. Lester's heart sank. Damn, she did have a date.

"Uncle Lester and me are gonna watch movies tonight, Kymme. I gots to see his booby books that are for Uncle Bobby's medicine. Right Uncle Lester?" Lester turned crimson. Kym sighed and crossed her arms.

"You left your porn mags laying around for a child to read?" This was not helping to win her back.

"Uncle Lester….how come you are all red?" Kym just shook her head and knelt down to give Gabby a kiss goodbye. "Kymme…how come you don't come to see Uncle Lester no more?" She glanced up at him.

"I'll let Uncle Lester explain that one to you, Gabs. I gotta go." Lester watched her leave….again. Damn.

"Come on Princess." Lester noticed the line had gone down. At least something was going right for him tonight.

"Welcome to McDonalds…can I help you?" a high school-aged boy impatiently asked.

"Uh…yeah. I'll take a Double Quarter pounder with cheese meal, supersized with a Pepsi….."

"We don't have Pepsi…we have coke," the kid rudely interrupted. Lester rolled his eyes. Fat little bastard.

"Whatever. And a hamburger Happy Meal with….what do you want to drink, Princess?" He picked her up and sat her on the edge of the counter.

"Pepsi!" The kid let out a long and exaggerated sigh. He leaned forward and got in Gabby's face.

"I just told you. We don't have Pepsi. We have Coke," he said nastily. Gabby's lower lip started to quiver, tears ran down her little cheeks, and began to sob.

"Uncle Lester! He was mean to me!" Lester lost control. He grabbed the kid by the collar and pulled him forward.

"What the hell is wrong with you? She's 3 years old. If she asked for Pepsi, just say okay. She's not going to know the difference….." He trailed off as he felt a gentle tapping on his arm. He looked down at Gabby.

"Three and a half," she corrected.

"Sorry, Princess. She's 3 and a half. You're lucky I don't make your fat ass run across the street to the 7-11 and get her a real Pepsi. Now get her a damn Happy Meal with a Pepsi before I knock your teeth down your fuckin' throat," Lester growled. He felt more tapping.

"I want a milkshake, too," she added through her sniffles.

"And a small milkshake." The pale kid was visibly shaking.

"Uh…w-what f-f-flavor?" Lester looked down at Gabby.

"Pink!" Pink? What the hell flavor was pink? He looked to the kid for help. The kid stared back wide-eyed. He was afraid to give Lester the wrong answer.

"Uh…strawberry?" he asked Gabby hesitantly. Lester and the kid waited anxiously for her answer.

"Pink!" she insisted. Lester mouthed… 'Strawberry'…to the kid. The kid nodded vigorously.

"One pink milkshake coming up!"

Lester could feel all the stares as he took the tray over to a table in the corner. He put the tray down and got Gabby seated. The kid gave her a large fry and about one of each Happy Meal toys that they had. He then set up all her food before he dug into his own meal. A heavy-set woman with a young boy were sitting at the next table. She glared at Lester.

"You really shouldn't use that kind of language in front of child like that. What is wrong with you?" she told him indignantly. Lester recoiled. Like he needed this shit right now.

"Uncle Lester was gonna knock Fat Ass's teeth down his fuckin' throat 'cause he was mean to me!" Gabby exclaimed in his defense pointing her little finger at the woman. Oh shit. "Right Uncle Lester?" Lester could feel his ears burning. "How come you're all red again?"

"Um….let's hurry up and finish so we can go on the slide," he replied. The best defense was to ignore the whole thing.

"Okay," she agreed. Thank god. "Uncle Lester?"

"Yeah, Princess?"

"That lady gots a booger hanging out of her nose." Lester looked over at her and snorted. The lady overheard and wiped it away with a napkin. Now it was her turn to be embarrassed. Good…take that you nosy, ugly, wouldn't fuck you with Tank's 10 foot dick Bitch!

After Gabby finished her pink shake, Lester took her out to the play area. There were a few kids but it wasn't crowded. The Booger lady and her son were out there. She shot Lester a death glare as she put her son of the Fry-guy rocker. Lester flipped her the bird. He was hoping Gabby wouldn't catch that move but she did. She gave him the finger.

"Look Uncle Lester! I can do that, too!" She was so proud of herself. I'm in deep shit, he thought.

"I see that, Princess. Uh…just don't show that to your Daddy….okay?" She smiled and bobbed her head up and down.

"Okay. Come on Uncle Lester, you have to slide with me," she insisted. Gabby started to climb up the steps inside Mayor McCheese. Lester ruefully examined the size of the entrance. It was a lot smaller than he remembered. "Hurry up!"

"I don't think I'm gonna fit," Lester explained. She began to pout and the lower lip quivered. Oh Christ. The lip! Fuck me. "Okay…I'll try." The tiny staircase curved around the back of Mayor McCheese up to his head. The slide came out from under his mouth. Lester squeezed himself into the narrow space. "Shit," he groaned.

"You said a bad word, Uncle Lester," Gabby's voice floated down from above him.

"Sorry, Princess." Jesus. This wasn't such a good idea. He tried to push himself into Mayor McCheese's head but couldn't get any further. "I don't fit, Princess. I'm sorry. I'm going to have to back out." Please don't cry, he thought.

"Okay," she sighed. He could tell she was disappointed. He would do anything for her, but this was physically impossible. He tried to back up but couldn't move. Fuck me….I'm stuck, he said to himself. He tried to twist himself but that didn't work either. This wasn't happening. It was bad enough that he was stuck inside Mayor McCheese, but he had Gabby with him. He tried to reach for his phone but couldn't get to it. Fanfuckingtastic.

"Gabby, I'm stuck." He looked up. She was looking down from the head.

"I can help you," she told him. She grabbed his hair and started to pull him up. He yelled out in pain.

"OUCH! Uh…no, Princess. I don't think that's gonna work. Can you come down the slide and see if you can reach my phone?"

"Okay." She disappeared from his site and went down the slide. He relaxed when he saw her again.

"Hey Mister….are you gonna sit there all day? I want to use the slide!" Lester craned his neck to see who was talking to him. It was the Booger lady's mutant kid.

"Uh yeah, Kid. I'm having so much fun that I think I'm gonna just sit here," he replied sarcastically. Gabby stood there and watched.

"I'm telling my mom!" He ran off.

"Gabby…try to see if you can get my phone out of my back pocket." Gabby looked at where he was pointing but couldn't reach it.

"I'm sorry, Uncle Lester, but I can't reach your butt."

"What's going on here?" Great….the Booger Lady.

"Uncle Lester is stuck and I can't reach his butt," Gabby explained.

"You are unfit to care for a child. You are foul mouthed and a pervert!" Booger lady huffed.

"He's not a pervert….he's a Puerto Rican!" Gabby insisted. Lester couldn't help himself. He started to laugh. Good one, Gabby!

"I'm glad you find this funny. I'm calling the police!" Booger lady took out her phone.

"What's going on here?" Lester shifted to see who that was.

"Uncle Joe!" Gabby ran to him and he picked her up. It was Joe Morelli and his wife Kathy. "You gots to help Uncle Lester, Uncle Joe. He's stuck and that ugly lady is gonna call the cops on him!" Joe handed Gabby to Kathy and walked over to Mayor McCheese. His smile got wider.

"Oh yeah…..Steph and Ranger are gonna love this." He walked around Mayor McCheese trying to survey the situation. He leaned in close. "You should have stuck to the Grimace….he's a little bigger." Then Joe laughed. Great, a fucking comedian in addition to being a cop.

"Don't worry, Lester. We'll stay with Gabby until we can get you out of there," Kathy reassured him. Joe looked at the opening again.

"I hate to tell you this, but I think we need to Fire Department to cut you out of that thing."

"The Fire Partment? YEA!" Gabby got all excited and clapped her hands.

***Back at the Control Room at Rangeman***

"Talk!" Tank barked into the phone. He was out of commission for another week from being impaled in the ass by the leg of Gabby's chair. They knew he was off line.

"Um…I'm sorry to bother you but Ranger's out," Zip replied. Tank sighed.

"What is it?"

"We just heard over the police scanner that there is an adult male stuck inside Mayor McCheese at the McDonalds on Hamilton." Tank waited for more. "They just called for the fire department to cut him out."

"That's fucking interesting but so what?"

"Um….Santos is babysitting Gabby, and he took her to McDonalds a few hours ago. He's not answering his phone." Tank's chest hitched. Then he full out howled with laughter. Gabby strikes again. "Send whoever's closest. Make sure Gabby's okay. Call me back with an update." This was better than a chair leg in the ass. He called back to the Control Room. "Make sure they get pictures of this."

TBC

Hey….the night's not over yet!