Series: Invader Zim

Pairing(s): ZADR (aka Zim/Dib)

Summary: Fear grips and holds. Panic pushes and sways. Confusion confounds and teases. Nobody is immune, not a visionary teen who never saw within himself, not a hidden alien who was never seen before, especially not when everyone finally opens their eyes.

Disclaimer: Invader Zim and all related characters, etc. are the property of Nickelodeon.

Other Notes: Okay, I'll honestly tell you that I'm only posting this up here now because I figure if I start putting it up, that'll motivate me to actually finish the last few parts of it. Yes, yes, I'm horrible like that. xD Every part is gonna be about this long, and you'll see how many parts there are. Let me go ahead and tell you that this isn't gonna be fluffy, or action-packed, or any of those things. I'm aiming for character development, one high-stress situation, and realism. Also, you can call this fanfic arguably AU, because I pretty much gave every human on Earth besides Dib and Gaz the adequate intelligence that they never display during the show. ^^; And let it be known that the ZADR is so mild it's not even funny; it's mostly undertones and thoughts and stuff. I have no idea what here could possibly look like fluff, but if it looks like fluff, it isn't. You're wrong. xD If you're looking for "fluff," then you're looking for my one-shots.

This fic being what it is, I feel that a lot of things in it can be called extremely iffy at best, so please, leave a review and tell me what needs fixing. Or leave a review telling me I'm doing well, just to make me feel better! Or leave a five-page-long essay on how and why I suck. Just leave a review. Please. xD

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It wasn't something that he'd ever admit out loud, he knew. No matter what; they could hold him underwater without his PAK and he still wouldn't admit it. In fact, he forced himself to think, there was absolutely no way that he could even consider the idea in reference to himself. It was simply ridiculous, he decided. He was far above such idiotic, inferior weaknesses.

He knew that that was a lie, of course, but he didn't see how that was at all relevant.

And so, as he ran in the rain from the smoldering wreckage of his beloved ship, his eyes wide and panicked and his breath coming in short, insufficient puffs and his three remaining spider legs quivering beneath the weight of his wildly shivering body and his invader instincts making his finger twitch violently towards the glove where his self-destruct button hid, Zim reminded himself in incoherent bursts of broken thought that invaders are never afraid. The tears flying wildly from his eyes and his antennae perking up frantically at the powerful shouts of the human mob ten or twenty meters at his rear were lying, lying! He wasn't afraid! He couldn't be! Fear? He hardly knew the meaning of the word! He was shaking from the cold, damnit, it was the cold! Tears? Invaders do not cry! Never! It is the rain, only that, and he wasn't sobbing or hyperventilating or anything of the sort!

Because, Zim told himself frantically as he tripped over his broken fourth spider leg and rolled into a puddle at the edge of the street, invaders are strong and never show fear because there is never any fear to show! And, Tallest be damned, Zim was an invader!

He was a proud Irken invader!

He forced that thought through his (oh so very superior!) mind as he curled up briefly in the puddle as though he could hope to hide in the night-blackened water away from the frightened numbness in his skin and the violent shaking through the whole of his being. Oh, he would never admit it, never, never, but Zim knew he was scared. Oh so very, very scared like he had never been before in his life! And it had been a long life, with many near-death experiences throughout it all, but what of that now! The humans, they had shot down his ship! His superior ship! They had, they had captured GIR, they had found Zim out! They were so very close to capturing Zim! And then they would... they would study him and they would cut him wide open and they would... they would...

Zim widened his eyes as he stared down the street, his mind grasping for some slight comfort and some slight solution. Where was he? What neighborhood was this? Where could he hide, where, where, where?

Zim summoned the whole of his unsurpassed willpower and used every ounce of it to strengthen his resolve that he would absolutely not allow himself to expire in this filthy place. He had to find somewhere! There had to be somewhere! He pushed himself onto his feet with slender arms shaking and bending wildly as though pushed around by the chaotic wind, then slipped and nearly fell back into the puddle before he thought to catch himself with his spider legs. He ran, sprinted, leaped, bounded down the street, mind racing for a location, absolutely anywhere where he could hide! The humans, they were catching up to him, they would capture him, they would... they would...

A house stood out to Zim like a lighthouse in the darkest storm. Familiar? Was it familiar to him? He couldn't be bothered to consider it; he bounded towards it with limbs flying in all directions as though they could make his spider legs move faster than they already were. He stopped at his arrival, innate survival instincts compelling him to yank one pillar of the house's security field out of its deep-rooted position in the ground. Pointing the dangerous, sparking end of the pillar towards the door of the house, Zim sprinted forwards to knock the door open and off one of its hinges, tripping forward onto his face in the process.

"Zim! What are you doing here?!" Dib snapped, startled out of watching Mysterious Mysteries, jumping off the couch into a threatened stance.

But Zim ignored the human entirely and fully, scrambling to his feet and racing towards the stairs. He had no idea why; his mind was racing far too quickly for him to catch the thought processes behind the decisions he was making. His instincts only told him to avoid his enemy's lab and to avoid his enemy, but since he was already in the house, only the bedroom, only the bedroom could be safe. Zim didn't know it, but his instincts realized that it was only in Dib's bedroom that the human could have hidden the numerous weapons and devices that he had stolen from Zim throughout the years. And how else could he stand a chance against the coming mob?

***

Dib could only stare, mind racing to make connections, as his enemy, utterly drenched, shook and shivered and tripped over himself as he sprinted up the stairs towards Dib's room. What in the hell was going on? But first things first, Dib made sure to close the door as best he could (Zim had come painfully close to breaking it completely); even after all these years, whatever Zim could do wasn't nearly as threatening as what Gaz would do to him if he left the door open in this awful storm. But closing the door took barely ten seconds and Dib was running up the stairs after his enemy before he heard his bedroom door slam shut.

Between seeing Zim burst in, running up the stairs, down the hall and through his bedroom door, Dib barely had time to comprehend anything—anything—that was going on before he stood, absolutely still from shock, watching his enemy stand in the corner of his room, eyes panicking and irrational, shaking violently and visibly, completely drenched and hurting from it but hardly even noticing, and completely and utterly terrified.

Dib barely realized it through the desperation that raced through the air at that moment, but the sight of Zim looking like that was one that broke his heart, completely and utterly.

"Zim?" he tried, concern filling his voice as though the alien weren't his mortal enemy at all, "Are you... What happened?"

He stepped forward towards the Irken, taking in Zim's appearance more and more; his antennae were in disarray and twitching madly, his invader uniform was damaged, his left boot was missing...

"Stay back! Leave me alone!" Zim cried, and Dib felt himself wince at the way his enemy's voice cracked in fear. Zim's usual rage was barely there, dodging in and out of the cacophony of despair and panic and fear that swirled around the alien like a hurricane.

"No, it's okay, I'm not gonna hurt you!" Dib cried instinctively, disbelief welling in a distant corner of his mind at the words coming out of his mouth. This was his enemy. His very vulnerable enemy! Without his disguise! Shouldn't this be a good thing? Shouldn't it... shouldn't Dib be happy, laughing even?

But Dib only raised his hands in the universal "I am not a threat" signal, attempting another step forward before he heard the slight whimper that escaped the alien before him. Dib felt utterly broken as he realized that Zim was shrinking away from him in the most profound fear that he had ever seen anyone demonstrate.

"What happened?" Dib asked, trying hard to hold back on the desperation in his voice; how could he let his enemy know how much seeing Zim in this state was tearing him apart?

"Th-th-they! Out there! And you... you're not... Stay back!" Zim shouted as decisively as he could after his nearly-incoherent babbling. "Stay away from me, you filthy worm, or I'll... I'll vaporize your brain! Your organs! All of them!"

"Take it easy, Zim, I'm not gonna hurt you! Just tell me what's going on!"

"You're going to cut me apart and tear out my squeedily-spooch!" Zim shouted loudly, voice hoarse with fear and forced rage. He hugged his arms around himself, as though to keep his organs from coming out on their own. But his arms shook so heavily that he could barely keep them tight around himself and he simply fell to his knees, eyes shut and teeth gritted together in a feeble attempt to steel himself against the incessant shivering coursing through his body.

"I... No, I'm not, I just..." Dib could hardly take it any longer. How could he possibly just stand there while Zim looked so utterly broken and afraid? This was so uncharacteristic of his cocky, overconfident demeanor most of the time, so what could have happened? What had terrified Zim so utterly? He couldn't have been... found out? That couldn't be it, could it?

Could it?

Dib didn't waste another moment considering it; his heart took control of his limbs and before he knew what was what or why, he was running forward and pulling Zim into a tight embrace.

But it was less than comforting, he supposed, as Zim suddenly tensed up completely, his eyes shooting open. "No, get away! Leave me alone, do not touch Zim!" he shrieked, pushing away Dib as best as he possibly could, but Dib kept his hold on the alien strong.

"It's okay, Zim! I'm not gonna hurt you, it'll be okay!" Dib shouted over Zim's protests and realizing just how horrible he was at calming people down. He was so very near crying at Zim's utterly pitiful state, but instead he reached up to stroke the back of Zim's head in hopes that he could maybe get Zim to stop freaking out.

Zim kept protesting, but quieter and quieter until his voice became a babbling whimper. He was, Dib realized, completely out of breath and utterly overwhelmed. And still quivering and hurt and drenched completely.

Then it clicked for Dib: Zim was completely drenched. With water.

Hurriedly, he reached over to yank the blanket off of his bed, still holding Zim with one arm. He all but held his breath as he let go of Zim completely to wrap the blanket around the alien; he wished he could have gotten a towel, but he couldn't just leave Zim here like this! "Here," Dib offered meekly to the alien, unable to ignore the suspicion and paranoia glaring at him through the panic, "You should dry off, right?"