Two and a half months after her wedding day, Evelyn woke up before daylight - sick. She sat up in bed and her head started spinning. She lay back down only to have her stomach start churning. She rolled onto her side and the queasiness seemed to get worse. She starting heaving and knew that there would soon be a mess on the floor. Evelyn moaned as she rolled herself out of bed and rushed to the bathroom. She had barely made it to the toilet when her stomach started ejecting it contents. Evelyn held her head over the bowl and retched until her eyes were filled with tears. After her stomach was empty, several moments had to pass before it completely settled down. She pushed herself away from the toilet, took a deep breath, sat on the floor and waited to see if her stomach would start rumbling again. After several minutes, she pulled herself up on her knees to the sink. Evelyn reached for the facet and turned on the water and washed out her mouth then splashed water on her face. She took another deep breath then slowly stood up. Her head started spinning and she quickly put the lid down on the toilet and sat down.
Evelyn had never been a sickly child nor a sickly woman but this morning she was feeling terrible, awful in fact. She propped her elbows on her thighs, cradled her head in her hands and sighed. It was horrible feeling horrible. As Evelyn sat there wishing the nausea would pass, she wondered if she had eaten something bad or if she had caught some virus. After several minutes, she slowly stood up and the queasiness remained but it was not as bad as it had been. Evelyn held her stomach as she slowly treaded back to bed.
"Evelyn?" Rick groaned when she sat down on the bed. "What are you doing up?" he asked, still more asleep than awake.
"I had to go the lavatory" Evelyn said as she began to ease back down in the comfortable bed.
"The what?" Rick said in a groggy voice.
"The bathroom" Evelyn said as she lay on her side.
Once she was settled, she felt Rick's arm around her waist then felt his chest snuggle up against her back. Within seconds, Rick was snoring and Evelyn knew it would be awhile before she would be able to fall back to sleep.
"Rick" she said as she nudged him.
"huh?" was his muddled response.
"You're snoring" she said.
"um hum..."
Rick quieted down for a few minutes before the fainted sound of a snore crept up into Evelyn's ears. Evelyn began to hum along with Rick's snores and before long she had drifted back to sleep.
When Evelyn finally woke up, the room was filled with the morning light that seeped in through the cracks in the curtains. Rick was still snuggled up against her back, still snoring. Evelyn threw back the covers, swung her legs over the side of the bed and sat up. She blew out a big breath and held her stomach, willing it to remain settled. It did and she concluded that she was over her early morning upset. Evelyn stood up and her head became to spin and she fell back on the bed.
"whew" she breathed. "oh god" she said in another breath as she grabbed her stomach and shot up from the bed.
She was heaving all the way to the bathroom and prayed that she would not empty her stomach on the floor. Evelyn made it to the toilet and fell to her knees. She lowered her head and retched but nothing came out. She felt as if she would throw up all of her insides as she continued heaving. When she was finally able to lift her head, her eyes were red and watery. Evelyn used the back of her hand to wipe her mouth then pulled herself up to the sink and repeated the routine she had performed just hours before.
And this is how Evelyn woke up for the next week. One her sixth day a nausea, while she was sitting in front of the commode catching her breath, Rick walked in.
"What's the matter Evelyn" he asked, concern etched on his features as he squatted down next to her.
"Nothing" she said as she took a deep breath.
"Something's the matter" he frowned. "You're sitting in front for the toilet looking like you threw up last night's dinner!"
"I'm fine" Evelyn tried to reassure him and herself. "Really."
"Then why are you looking like death warmed over?" he asked as he noticed her ashen face.
"I look like death?!" Evelyn frowned at his insult.
"Yeah" he said.
"Well... MR O'Connell" Evelyn said, hurt at his assessment of her appearance. "At the moment, YOU aren't exactly the most handsome man I've ever seen!"
Rick had blood shot eyes and sleep marks all over his face. His hair was a complete in disarray.
"And your breath stinks!" she said just before she pulled herself up on her knees. "I don't need your help" she said when Rick tried to assist her in standing up. "oooooohhh" she said and would have fallen back to her knees if Rick had not caught her.
"Don't need my help huh?" Rick said as he held her around the waist and lowered the toilet seat.
"No" Evelyn said as Rick guided her to sit on the toilet lid.
"I'm taking you to see a doctor."
"No..." Evelyn hated doctors. "I'm fine. It was probably something I ate."
"Well the doctor can tell us that" Rick said.
"I'M telling us that!" Evelyn said. She hated it when Rick acted like a dictator. "It was something I ate!"
"Well, I want to hear it from somebody who knows what they are talking about" Rick said.
They sat in the bathroom for another five minutes arguing about going to see a doctor. The argument continued as they both got dressed and went to the kitchen for breakfast.
"I mean it Evelyn. YOU are going to see a doctor. You could have some deadly virus or something."
"What's all the yelling about?" Jonathan asked as he came into the kitchen, still in his pajamas.
"Evelyn is sick."
"I am NOT!"
"Yes you are!"
"NO I AM NOT!!"
"YES... YOU ARE!!"
Jonathan looked from one combatant to the other, as his sister said NO she was not and his brother-in-law YES she was.
"What's the matter Evy?" Jonathan asked, figuring it would be safer to side with O'Connell.
"NOTHING! NOTHING! NOTHING!" Evelyn yelled as she stomped her foot.
"Then ask her why she was puking her guts out just a few minutes ago" Rick said to Jonathan as he continued frowning at Evelyn.
"That is so ill-mannered!" Evelyn frowned back, referring to his crude description of her bout with nausea
"Answer the question!" he said. "WHY were you puking your guts out?!"
Evelyn fumed at Rick then turned her back on him and stomped out of the kitchen.
"I'll be at the museum at twelve!" he yelled after her. "And I'll drag you to the doctor if I have too!"
Rick heard the front door slam but he knew Evelyn had heard him.
"So, do you think something is really wrong with her?" Jonathan asked as he too began to worry.
"I don't know" Rick said as he ran his hand through his hair. "I don't know what I'd do..." he did not want to think about Evelyn having some killer disease.
"I'm sure she's fine. She's a sturdy old mum" Jonathan said, trying to assure Rick and himself. He didn't know what he'd do either if something terrible were wrong with Evelyn.
************************
"Mrs. O'Connell, you're in perfect health" the doctor said.
Evelyn breathed a sigh of relief at his words. "Why am I have these horrible bouts with nausea then?"
"You're expecting."
"Expecting what?"
"A baby."
"A baby?" Evelyn was sure she had not heard right.
"Yes, a baby" the doctor nodded in the affirmative.
"A baby?" she said again.
Evelyn did not know the first thing about babies. How in the world could she be expecting one? Then her face turned red as she thought about how she had come to this state of expectancy. That husband of hers was an insatiable one, not that she was complaining. She began to tingle inside as she thought of his caress, his touch. A tiny smile formed as she thought of his hot breath in her ear, his explicit words that made her body react just as his skilled hands did. And then when he invaded her body...
"Mrs. O'Connell? Are you OK?"
"Yes" Evelyn said, turning a darker shade of red. "I was just thinking... oh never mind. Are you SURE about this doctor?"
"Positive" he smiled. "Would you like for me to bring in your husband and tell him the good news."
"Oh no..." Evelyn was not sure she was ready for a baby, let alone Rick being ready for one. "I'd like to tell him myself. But would you please tell him that I am doing fine. He's been a bit worried about me."
After hearing from a professional that Evelyn was OK, Rick breathed easier. But Evelyn did not. A baby. She was expecting a baby and that news was not settling well with her. This was unexpected and she and Rick had not even discussed children. Though she knew she wanted them one day, today was not that day. A mother. She did not know how to be a mother. And with her own mother gone, whom could she turn to for guidance? The more she thought about her shortcomings in the area of motherhood, the more depressed she became. A baby was a precious thing and Evelyn felt so inadequate.
Evelyn wished with all her heart that her mother were there to ease her uneasiness and tell her that everything would be all right. She found comfort in remembering her mother and her soothing voice. She pulled out the family photo book and flipped through the pages. There were pictures of her father, her mother, her parents together. Pictures of her, Jonathan, her and Jonathan, her and her mother, her and her father, Jonathan and their mother, Jonathan and their father. There were pictures of the entire family together. Evelyn smiled as she remembered them as a family. And now she was starting a family of her own. But could she do it? Could be she the mother her own mother was?
When Evelyn flipped to the last page, there were two folded notes tucked in the crevices that held the pictures. One had Jonathan's name scripted on it and the other had her name. They were written in her mother's hand. Evelyn removed the note addressed to her and unfolded it.
My Dearest Daughter Evelyn
As I sit here watching you sleep, I fall more in love with you by the second. I am still amazed that you are mine. I ask myself over and over what I did to deserve such a gift as you. I may never understand why you were given to me but I will promise you that I will do my best to be a good mother.
I was absolutely terrified when I found out I was carrying your brother Jonathan and when he came into the world, my fears did not cease. Instead they increased because I loved him so much that I was afraid I would not be able to give him all that he needed. Your father was an angel as he bear up under my hysterics and eventually I became more comfortable, then more confident that I could care for Jonathan properly.
And now I have you. Even though my fears and insecurities returned, as I look at you, I know nothing in this world or the next will stop me from loving you with all my heart.
And one day, you will have your own precious gift from above and I know, even as I look at you now, that you will love that child with all you heart.
From the heart of your mother, With all the love she has for you.
Evelyn had started crying when she saw her name written in her mother's hand and now she was in total tears as the fruit of love began to blossom in her heart. She could do it. She would do it. Her mother's letter had wiped away her fear and uncertainty. This was her baby and she would do whatever it took to be a good mother.
And now it was time to tell the father.
**************************
It took Evelyn another three days before she was almost ready to tell Rick about her condition. She had decided she would tell him that morning but it was not until later that evening that she finally found the right words.
"Rick?" Evelyn called as she walked into the sitting room.
"Yeah" he said without looking up from his task of cleaning his weapons.
"I need to speak with you" she said as she walked over to him.
"OK" he said, stilling focusing on his weapons.
"Do you mind putting that down" she said with perturbation as she stood over him.
Evelyn's emotions were unstable due to her condition and her tolerance for having only part of Rick's attention was low. He looked up when he heard the agitation in her tone.
"What is it?" he asked, looking up at her frown. "Is something wrong?"
"No. Not..." Evelyn began. "Not exactly."
"What do you mean, 'not exactly'" he said.
"Nothing's wrong" she said.
Evelyn stood there looking down at Rick and Rick sat there looking up at Evelyn.
"What is it Evelyn?" Rick asked when she continued to stare down at him.
"I'm... ah..."
"Yeah" Rick motioned with his hand for her to continue. "You're... Evelyn" he said when she stood mute. "Are you sure you're OK?"
"I'm fine" Evelyn said as she pulled out the chair and sat at the table.
Evelyn set her forearms on the table, folded her hands together and breathed a heavy breath as she looked at Rick.
"Rick"
"Yeah"
"I have something to tell you."
"I figured that much out."
"Are you... no that's not what I what to say. I have a condition."
"I thought that damn doctor said you were OK!" Rick panicked.
"I am" Evelyn said then reached for his hand. "I'm fine. Really" she said as she saw the fear in his eyes.
"Well, what kind of condition do you have?" Rick asked, still a little anxious.
Evelyn took a deep breath as her heart pounded.
"I'm expecting."
"Expecting what?"
"A baby."
Rick sat looking at Evelyn, not saying anything, not quite sure he heard her correctly. He frowned a bewildered frown and shook his head as if to clear it.
"Rick?" Evelyn said after a few moments. "You're what?" Rick said at the same time.
"I'm... I'm... expecting a baby" she said.
Evelyn watched Rick's reaction and it was not what she had hoped for. Evelyn expected him to be surprised. She surely had been. And maybe a little apprehensive. She had been more than frightened at the thought of being a mother. But then, after the initial shock, she expected him to be happy. They were having a baby and, after getting over the fear and doubt, that was the happiest news a couple could receive.
Or at least that was what Evelyn thought. Rick's reaction went from disbelief to surprise to... uneasiness then anxiety then dread then rejection. He never made it to happiness.
"Rick..." Evelyn whispered, her voice shaking. Aren't... aren't you happy... about the baby?"
Rick could not answer her without hurting her. A kid? That was the farthest thing from his mind - a kid. He did not want to think about a kid. A kid needed parents, a mother and a father. He was not ready to be a parent, a father and did not think he would ever be ready.
"How did it happen?" he said, more to himself than to her.
"How?" Evelyn said.
Rick was asking how did this happen. If she knew, he had to know. Then Evelyn saw something she did not want to see. The look in his eyes said a baby was not something he particularly desired.
"You don't... you don't want the baby..." she whispered in an accusing voice as she slowly stood up.
"Evelyn..." Rick stood up and reached for her as he tried to find the right words to say.
"No!" she put her hand up to ward him off and took a step back.
"Evelyn..." he took a step toward her and reached for her again.
"no..." she said as tears formed in her eyes and she took another step away from him. "Stay away from me" she said as she backed out the room.
"Evelyn..." he tried again.
"Don't!" she said as a tear slid down her cheek and she turned and ran to their room.
Rick watched her go, unable to move, unable to find the words to explain to her. He was torn inside, not wanting to hurt the woman he loved, but not wanting to admit to the fear inside of him.
Evelyn shut the bedroom door and locked it. She turned and leaned against the door then slid down to the floor. How could Rick not want the baby, their baby? she wondered as her heart broke. She loved him and she already loved the baby she carried. Her baby. His baby. Their baby. How could he not want this baby?
Evelyn's unbalanced hormones enticed her imagination to run wild with speculations. She wondered if it had been a mistake marrying him. She had only known him a few short weeks and he had asked her to marry him. She had said 'yes' so quickly and without a second thought. And now she was beginning to see that was a mistake.
But Evelyn loved him. Or at least she thought she did. Had the first man who had dared to steal a kiss from her sweep her off her feet? Had the knight in shining armor who had rescued the damsel in distress dazzle her? Had the adventure they survived together trick her into believing they shared something special? Had she been a fool to marry him?
'Yes' she thought as she cried silently. It was obvious that he did not love her, she reasoned in her unreasonable state of mind. How could he love her and not want their baby? One of the reasons she fell in love with the baby inside of her was because it was a part of Rick. And she loved Rick. Yes she did love him, she knew in her heart she did. But was she a fool to love him?
Evelyn was crying when the doorknob turned.
"Evelyn" Rick called. "Open up."
When the door did not open, Rick tried again. "Evelyn open up."
"GO AWAY!" she said.
"Evelyn..." Rick laid his forehead against the door. "Open the door" he begged. "Please."
Rick was met with silence and he immediately got angry.
"Open the damn door Evelyn!"
"I said GO AWAY!" Evelyn yelled back. If she were given to using fowl language she would have told him a thing or two. But she was a lady and fowl language was not proper, no matter how upset she was.
"OPEN THE DOOR!" Rick said in frustration as he turned the doorknob again.
Rick instantly remembered the last time a locked bedroom door stood between them. He had locked her in but this time she had locked him out. If he were not so angry with her and himself, he would have laughed.
"GO AWAY!" she said again.
"Fine!" he said and turned away from the door.
Evelyn sat on the floor crying and Rick sat at the casbah drinking. Neither one knowing where they would go from here.
Evelyn had never been a sickly child nor a sickly woman but this morning she was feeling terrible, awful in fact. She propped her elbows on her thighs, cradled her head in her hands and sighed. It was horrible feeling horrible. As Evelyn sat there wishing the nausea would pass, she wondered if she had eaten something bad or if she had caught some virus. After several minutes, she slowly stood up and the queasiness remained but it was not as bad as it had been. Evelyn held her stomach as she slowly treaded back to bed.
"Evelyn?" Rick groaned when she sat down on the bed. "What are you doing up?" he asked, still more asleep than awake.
"I had to go the lavatory" Evelyn said as she began to ease back down in the comfortable bed.
"The what?" Rick said in a groggy voice.
"The bathroom" Evelyn said as she lay on her side.
Once she was settled, she felt Rick's arm around her waist then felt his chest snuggle up against her back. Within seconds, Rick was snoring and Evelyn knew it would be awhile before she would be able to fall back to sleep.
"Rick" she said as she nudged him.
"huh?" was his muddled response.
"You're snoring" she said.
"um hum..."
Rick quieted down for a few minutes before the fainted sound of a snore crept up into Evelyn's ears. Evelyn began to hum along with Rick's snores and before long she had drifted back to sleep.
When Evelyn finally woke up, the room was filled with the morning light that seeped in through the cracks in the curtains. Rick was still snuggled up against her back, still snoring. Evelyn threw back the covers, swung her legs over the side of the bed and sat up. She blew out a big breath and held her stomach, willing it to remain settled. It did and she concluded that she was over her early morning upset. Evelyn stood up and her head became to spin and she fell back on the bed.
"whew" she breathed. "oh god" she said in another breath as she grabbed her stomach and shot up from the bed.
She was heaving all the way to the bathroom and prayed that she would not empty her stomach on the floor. Evelyn made it to the toilet and fell to her knees. She lowered her head and retched but nothing came out. She felt as if she would throw up all of her insides as she continued heaving. When she was finally able to lift her head, her eyes were red and watery. Evelyn used the back of her hand to wipe her mouth then pulled herself up to the sink and repeated the routine she had performed just hours before.
And this is how Evelyn woke up for the next week. One her sixth day a nausea, while she was sitting in front of the commode catching her breath, Rick walked in.
"What's the matter Evelyn" he asked, concern etched on his features as he squatted down next to her.
"Nothing" she said as she took a deep breath.
"Something's the matter" he frowned. "You're sitting in front for the toilet looking like you threw up last night's dinner!"
"I'm fine" Evelyn tried to reassure him and herself. "Really."
"Then why are you looking like death warmed over?" he asked as he noticed her ashen face.
"I look like death?!" Evelyn frowned at his insult.
"Yeah" he said.
"Well... MR O'Connell" Evelyn said, hurt at his assessment of her appearance. "At the moment, YOU aren't exactly the most handsome man I've ever seen!"
Rick had blood shot eyes and sleep marks all over his face. His hair was a complete in disarray.
"And your breath stinks!" she said just before she pulled herself up on her knees. "I don't need your help" she said when Rick tried to assist her in standing up. "oooooohhh" she said and would have fallen back to her knees if Rick had not caught her.
"Don't need my help huh?" Rick said as he held her around the waist and lowered the toilet seat.
"No" Evelyn said as Rick guided her to sit on the toilet lid.
"I'm taking you to see a doctor."
"No..." Evelyn hated doctors. "I'm fine. It was probably something I ate."
"Well the doctor can tell us that" Rick said.
"I'M telling us that!" Evelyn said. She hated it when Rick acted like a dictator. "It was something I ate!"
"Well, I want to hear it from somebody who knows what they are talking about" Rick said.
They sat in the bathroom for another five minutes arguing about going to see a doctor. The argument continued as they both got dressed and went to the kitchen for breakfast.
"I mean it Evelyn. YOU are going to see a doctor. You could have some deadly virus or something."
"What's all the yelling about?" Jonathan asked as he came into the kitchen, still in his pajamas.
"Evelyn is sick."
"I am NOT!"
"Yes you are!"
"NO I AM NOT!!"
"YES... YOU ARE!!"
Jonathan looked from one combatant to the other, as his sister said NO she was not and his brother-in-law YES she was.
"What's the matter Evy?" Jonathan asked, figuring it would be safer to side with O'Connell.
"NOTHING! NOTHING! NOTHING!" Evelyn yelled as she stomped her foot.
"Then ask her why she was puking her guts out just a few minutes ago" Rick said to Jonathan as he continued frowning at Evelyn.
"That is so ill-mannered!" Evelyn frowned back, referring to his crude description of her bout with nausea
"Answer the question!" he said. "WHY were you puking your guts out?!"
Evelyn fumed at Rick then turned her back on him and stomped out of the kitchen.
"I'll be at the museum at twelve!" he yelled after her. "And I'll drag you to the doctor if I have too!"
Rick heard the front door slam but he knew Evelyn had heard him.
"So, do you think something is really wrong with her?" Jonathan asked as he too began to worry.
"I don't know" Rick said as he ran his hand through his hair. "I don't know what I'd do..." he did not want to think about Evelyn having some killer disease.
"I'm sure she's fine. She's a sturdy old mum" Jonathan said, trying to assure Rick and himself. He didn't know what he'd do either if something terrible were wrong with Evelyn.
************************
"Mrs. O'Connell, you're in perfect health" the doctor said.
Evelyn breathed a sigh of relief at his words. "Why am I have these horrible bouts with nausea then?"
"You're expecting."
"Expecting what?"
"A baby."
"A baby?" Evelyn was sure she had not heard right.
"Yes, a baby" the doctor nodded in the affirmative.
"A baby?" she said again.
Evelyn did not know the first thing about babies. How in the world could she be expecting one? Then her face turned red as she thought about how she had come to this state of expectancy. That husband of hers was an insatiable one, not that she was complaining. She began to tingle inside as she thought of his caress, his touch. A tiny smile formed as she thought of his hot breath in her ear, his explicit words that made her body react just as his skilled hands did. And then when he invaded her body...
"Mrs. O'Connell? Are you OK?"
"Yes" Evelyn said, turning a darker shade of red. "I was just thinking... oh never mind. Are you SURE about this doctor?"
"Positive" he smiled. "Would you like for me to bring in your husband and tell him the good news."
"Oh no..." Evelyn was not sure she was ready for a baby, let alone Rick being ready for one. "I'd like to tell him myself. But would you please tell him that I am doing fine. He's been a bit worried about me."
After hearing from a professional that Evelyn was OK, Rick breathed easier. But Evelyn did not. A baby. She was expecting a baby and that news was not settling well with her. This was unexpected and she and Rick had not even discussed children. Though she knew she wanted them one day, today was not that day. A mother. She did not know how to be a mother. And with her own mother gone, whom could she turn to for guidance? The more she thought about her shortcomings in the area of motherhood, the more depressed she became. A baby was a precious thing and Evelyn felt so inadequate.
Evelyn wished with all her heart that her mother were there to ease her uneasiness and tell her that everything would be all right. She found comfort in remembering her mother and her soothing voice. She pulled out the family photo book and flipped through the pages. There were pictures of her father, her mother, her parents together. Pictures of her, Jonathan, her and Jonathan, her and her mother, her and her father, Jonathan and their mother, Jonathan and their father. There were pictures of the entire family together. Evelyn smiled as she remembered them as a family. And now she was starting a family of her own. But could she do it? Could be she the mother her own mother was?
When Evelyn flipped to the last page, there were two folded notes tucked in the crevices that held the pictures. One had Jonathan's name scripted on it and the other had her name. They were written in her mother's hand. Evelyn removed the note addressed to her and unfolded it.
My Dearest Daughter Evelyn
As I sit here watching you sleep, I fall more in love with you by the second. I am still amazed that you are mine. I ask myself over and over what I did to deserve such a gift as you. I may never understand why you were given to me but I will promise you that I will do my best to be a good mother.
I was absolutely terrified when I found out I was carrying your brother Jonathan and when he came into the world, my fears did not cease. Instead they increased because I loved him so much that I was afraid I would not be able to give him all that he needed. Your father was an angel as he bear up under my hysterics and eventually I became more comfortable, then more confident that I could care for Jonathan properly.
And now I have you. Even though my fears and insecurities returned, as I look at you, I know nothing in this world or the next will stop me from loving you with all my heart.
And one day, you will have your own precious gift from above and I know, even as I look at you now, that you will love that child with all you heart.
From the heart of your mother, With all the love she has for you.
Evelyn had started crying when she saw her name written in her mother's hand and now she was in total tears as the fruit of love began to blossom in her heart. She could do it. She would do it. Her mother's letter had wiped away her fear and uncertainty. This was her baby and she would do whatever it took to be a good mother.
And now it was time to tell the father.
**************************
It took Evelyn another three days before she was almost ready to tell Rick about her condition. She had decided she would tell him that morning but it was not until later that evening that she finally found the right words.
"Rick?" Evelyn called as she walked into the sitting room.
"Yeah" he said without looking up from his task of cleaning his weapons.
"I need to speak with you" she said as she walked over to him.
"OK" he said, stilling focusing on his weapons.
"Do you mind putting that down" she said with perturbation as she stood over him.
Evelyn's emotions were unstable due to her condition and her tolerance for having only part of Rick's attention was low. He looked up when he heard the agitation in her tone.
"What is it?" he asked, looking up at her frown. "Is something wrong?"
"No. Not..." Evelyn began. "Not exactly."
"What do you mean, 'not exactly'" he said.
"Nothing's wrong" she said.
Evelyn stood there looking down at Rick and Rick sat there looking up at Evelyn.
"What is it Evelyn?" Rick asked when she continued to stare down at him.
"I'm... ah..."
"Yeah" Rick motioned with his hand for her to continue. "You're... Evelyn" he said when she stood mute. "Are you sure you're OK?"
"I'm fine" Evelyn said as she pulled out the chair and sat at the table.
Evelyn set her forearms on the table, folded her hands together and breathed a heavy breath as she looked at Rick.
"Rick"
"Yeah"
"I have something to tell you."
"I figured that much out."
"Are you... no that's not what I what to say. I have a condition."
"I thought that damn doctor said you were OK!" Rick panicked.
"I am" Evelyn said then reached for his hand. "I'm fine. Really" she said as she saw the fear in his eyes.
"Well, what kind of condition do you have?" Rick asked, still a little anxious.
Evelyn took a deep breath as her heart pounded.
"I'm expecting."
"Expecting what?"
"A baby."
Rick sat looking at Evelyn, not saying anything, not quite sure he heard her correctly. He frowned a bewildered frown and shook his head as if to clear it.
"Rick?" Evelyn said after a few moments. "You're what?" Rick said at the same time.
"I'm... I'm... expecting a baby" she said.
Evelyn watched Rick's reaction and it was not what she had hoped for. Evelyn expected him to be surprised. She surely had been. And maybe a little apprehensive. She had been more than frightened at the thought of being a mother. But then, after the initial shock, she expected him to be happy. They were having a baby and, after getting over the fear and doubt, that was the happiest news a couple could receive.
Or at least that was what Evelyn thought. Rick's reaction went from disbelief to surprise to... uneasiness then anxiety then dread then rejection. He never made it to happiness.
"Rick..." Evelyn whispered, her voice shaking. Aren't... aren't you happy... about the baby?"
Rick could not answer her without hurting her. A kid? That was the farthest thing from his mind - a kid. He did not want to think about a kid. A kid needed parents, a mother and a father. He was not ready to be a parent, a father and did not think he would ever be ready.
"How did it happen?" he said, more to himself than to her.
"How?" Evelyn said.
Rick was asking how did this happen. If she knew, he had to know. Then Evelyn saw something she did not want to see. The look in his eyes said a baby was not something he particularly desired.
"You don't... you don't want the baby..." she whispered in an accusing voice as she slowly stood up.
"Evelyn..." Rick stood up and reached for her as he tried to find the right words to say.
"No!" she put her hand up to ward him off and took a step back.
"Evelyn..." he took a step toward her and reached for her again.
"no..." she said as tears formed in her eyes and she took another step away from him. "Stay away from me" she said as she backed out the room.
"Evelyn..." he tried again.
"Don't!" she said as a tear slid down her cheek and she turned and ran to their room.
Rick watched her go, unable to move, unable to find the words to explain to her. He was torn inside, not wanting to hurt the woman he loved, but not wanting to admit to the fear inside of him.
Evelyn shut the bedroom door and locked it. She turned and leaned against the door then slid down to the floor. How could Rick not want the baby, their baby? she wondered as her heart broke. She loved him and she already loved the baby she carried. Her baby. His baby. Their baby. How could he not want this baby?
Evelyn's unbalanced hormones enticed her imagination to run wild with speculations. She wondered if it had been a mistake marrying him. She had only known him a few short weeks and he had asked her to marry him. She had said 'yes' so quickly and without a second thought. And now she was beginning to see that was a mistake.
But Evelyn loved him. Or at least she thought she did. Had the first man who had dared to steal a kiss from her sweep her off her feet? Had the knight in shining armor who had rescued the damsel in distress dazzle her? Had the adventure they survived together trick her into believing they shared something special? Had she been a fool to marry him?
'Yes' she thought as she cried silently. It was obvious that he did not love her, she reasoned in her unreasonable state of mind. How could he love her and not want their baby? One of the reasons she fell in love with the baby inside of her was because it was a part of Rick. And she loved Rick. Yes she did love him, she knew in her heart she did. But was she a fool to love him?
Evelyn was crying when the doorknob turned.
"Evelyn" Rick called. "Open up."
When the door did not open, Rick tried again. "Evelyn open up."
"GO AWAY!" she said.
"Evelyn..." Rick laid his forehead against the door. "Open the door" he begged. "Please."
Rick was met with silence and he immediately got angry.
"Open the damn door Evelyn!"
"I said GO AWAY!" Evelyn yelled back. If she were given to using fowl language she would have told him a thing or two. But she was a lady and fowl language was not proper, no matter how upset she was.
"OPEN THE DOOR!" Rick said in frustration as he turned the doorknob again.
Rick instantly remembered the last time a locked bedroom door stood between them. He had locked her in but this time she had locked him out. If he were not so angry with her and himself, he would have laughed.
"GO AWAY!" she said again.
"Fine!" he said and turned away from the door.
Evelyn sat on the floor crying and Rick sat at the casbah drinking. Neither one knowing where they would go from here.