Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

A/N: Huh...my birthday was only a few days after Deidara's...

"SEMPAI!!! OH, SEMPAI!!! LOOK WHAT I FOUND!!!"

Deidara glanced up from the bonfire he had set up to see Tobi dashing towards him, a large bundle heaved over his shoulder. However, as the orange-masked goof drew closer, Deidara saw that it was not a bundle, but a girl that Tobi had captured. She had long raven-black hair, pearly-white eyes, and a pale complexion. She also looked like she was scared out of her mind, and really, Deidara couldn't blame her.

"Look at it, sempai!!" Tobi exclaimed as he placed the girl down on the ground; she was tied up with chakra-embedded rope, "Isn't it cute?!!"

Deidara slapped his palm against his forehead; why did he have to be partnered up with such an idiot? "Tobi, you shithead! You don't even know where that thing has been, un!! Take it back into the woods where you found it!!! It looks like it's probably riddled with STDs!!! I am NOT going to get a STD again, un!!!"

The black-haired girl wanted to tell them to at least call her a 'her' instead of an 'it', but the chakra ropes left her words muffled.

"Aww, but sempaiiiiii...!! IT'S SO KAWAII!!! I WANT IT!!!" Tobi squealed, pulling hard on the girl's cheek for emphasis. Deidara grumbled something unintelligable under his breath.

Kneeling down in front of the girl, Deidara stared at her for what felt like hours on end. Finally, he stood back up and grunted. "Hmmm...it IS cute...un. Dammit...now I'm not so sure if we should get rid of it! I like cute things...un..."

"So...can I keep it...?" Tobi asked hopefully, putting on his best 'Sad-Puppy-Dog-Eyes-Look'.

"Well, I don't think the boss will like us keeping pets, un," Deidara replied, scratching his chin, "But...I guess it'll be alright for a little while. We can use it as a human-shield, un!!!"

The girl let out a gasp of shock. 'HUMAN-SHIELD...?!! All I wanted to do was train, and yet now look at the situation I'm in!!!'

"YAAAAAAAAAY!!!" Tobi picked the girl up and swung her around wildly, "I'M GONNA NAME YOU HINA-CHAN...'CAUSE YA KINDA LOOK LIKE A HINA-CHAN!!!"

Poor Hinata was definitely not going to have a good day today...