Okay so that was a lie. I was no faster, was I? Considering… The last time I updated was what, October? And it's January now?

Stripysockz: OMNOMNOM REVIEWS. Of course he's enjoying his attention, it's Sunstreaker~ D

Starfire201: Megatron would agree. Fully.

Meteor Prime: HECKYES I'm back! I'm sorry; I'm a naturally lazy person. And of course he likes pink. Annnd if he saw this I'd be gone.

Thanks for the reviews~

Disclaimer: Do not own~

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Starscream stared at the spinning wheel in front of him, his optics widening slightly as he gazed at the sharp point of the needle before him. To the right of him, off stage, Thundercracker tapped his foot impatiently while Skywarp urged the aerial commander on as subtly as he could.

But Starscream wouldn't do it. In front of him, Sunstreaker rolled his optics with annoyance and tapped his foot impatiently; placing a hand on his hip and turning his great head to the side as he waited.

But still, Starscream wouldn't do it.

As murmurings from the audience began Starscream whirled around, and with a shaking hand he pointed at the great needle of the spinning needle. "I'm not touching that." He warned, glaring directly at Skywarp who hung his head with exasperation.

"But it's part of the play, Starscream!" He yelled back to his commander, who folded his arms across his chest and glared at the purple and black counterpart.

"I don't care, I'm not touching it."

Sunstreaker snorted, lowering a hand to brush at his black garment. "Don't tell me you're afraid of needles."

Starscream turned around, his upper lip curling as he regarded the Autobot. "And what if I am?"

Sunstreaker shrugged, wincing as the fabric dug into his shoulder joints uncomfortably. "Well, I guess I'll have to do this then."

Starscream arched his optic ridge, his smirk broadening as he stared directly at the Autobot. "Do what?"

Sunstreaker's robed arm flew out, grasping the Decepticon's hand in a tight grip. Starscream's optics flashed with panic and he let out a loud yelp as Sunstreaker pulled the air commander's hand down, and pressing the tip of the Decepticon's digit onto the tip of the needle.

Everyone was silent; Starscream's face was the picture of horror as he stared at his finger, the needle, and finally Sunstreaker, who merely shrugged and let go of the hand.

Staggering back Starscream let out a tiny whimper; then, with a whir of failing mechanics and quite possibly panic the air commander dropped to the floor in a dead faint.

From the sidelines, Thundercracker watched, his left optic twitching as his commander dropped to the ground. Then, briefly emerging from his position at the side he pointed sarcastically to the prone form, his mouth twisting into a sneer. "My commander, femmes and mechs." At Skywarp's glare Thundercracker returned to his spot, shaking his head sorrowfully and muttering about mechs who offlined themselves.

Sunstreaker looked down at Starscream's prone body, finding himself indignant to the fact that the aerial commander hadn't even been able to faint on the bed that he was supposed to position himself on. With a resigned sigh he picked up Starscream's legs and pulled him none too gently to the bed, smirking when the Decepticon's head knocked against the spinning wheel. Then, with a heave he deposited the Decepticon on the bed, taking care to tuck him in before stepping onto the stage's trap door, disappearing in a cloud of green smoke.

The stage went dark momentarily and the audience could just barely see the group of other 'bots, their frames blackened, moved about the scene, changing it quickly before the lights brightened again to reveal Thundercracker on stage, accompanied by a now positively murderous looking Ironhide with a snickering Sideswipe and a smiling Jazz.

Thundercracker, armed with a hastily painted sword and shield, stood before Sunstreaker, who looked as thunderous as ever in his role. Raising his hands the yellow Autobot screeched, "Now you shall deal with me, old prince, and with the powers of hell!" And with that a large cloud of hazy green smoke bubbled over the stage and into the audience, where anyone in the front row (Minus the ducks of course, they seemed to be enjoying the entire ordeal from what anyone could gather) raised their feet almost disgustedly.

Optimus raised an optic ridge and turned to Prowl, who, throughout the play, had seemed to be sinking lower and lower in his seat, until finally his head was resting in his hands and his doorwings drooping so far, they seemed to meld into his back entirely. "Do you think Smokescreen was involved?" He asked, hoping to distract Prowl's no doubt aching processor.

"I don't know. I don't care. I just want to go back to the Ark, where it's nice and safe and logical." Prowl moaned and lowered himself even further, and Optimus couldn't help but wonder if maybe the tactician was hoping that the floor would swallow him up and take him far, far away from here. As he pondered, his head turning back to focus on the play, he wondered if he might follow.

And then it occurred to him. Where was Megatron? He hadn't seen him anywhere, and the thought crossed his mind, now, that maybe this was an elaborate trap sprung by the leader of the Decepticons to lure them into a safe area, and then pick them off. He cast a wary glance to the Decepticons across the row from him, and he narrowed his optics as he searched for the Decepticon leader. It wouldn't have been his worst plan, considering Megatron's half-cocked plans in the past were, if anything, inventive. Like that giant purple griffin. That was when he knew that Megatron was well and truly out of most of his ideas.

He wasn't, however, expecting Megatron's massive form to appear on stage as the smoke cleared. He looked miserable, for upon his head was stuck a giant cardboard dragon's head, painted black with a mouth stuck open wide, with little white pieces glued in to form teeth. Taped to his back were stubby little wings, and on his hands and feet were booties and mittens, also painted to match the dragon's colour scheme. Thundercracker let out an involuntary snort and had to cover his mouth with his hands and turn away.

The audience let out a collective gasp and Optimus lowered himself in his seat, on his way to imitate Prowl, who was now practically on the floor. "This is my enemy. This is who I have been at war with, all this time." He sighed, rubbing his face plate before once again looking at the stage.

Megatron heaved a great sigh before turning to look at the audience, the outrageous dragon head wobbling as he moved. "Roar." He said, almost miserably before turning back to Thundercracker, who had erupted in another fit of laughter. Behind him the three fairies were all snorting with laughter, Ironhide in particular having to lower himself to his knees, he was laughing so hard.

Then Megatron pinged a message to each of their heads, his message loud and clear though the menace behind was lowered considerably due to his get up. "I will kill him. I will kill you. Especially if you do not stop laughing right this minute."

Thundercracker, for his part, managed to stop laughing long enough to clumsily, with the aid of the three fairies, plunge his sword into the arm of Megatron, who took it angrily, made strange gurgling noises, and promptly fell to the ground, where he was gently lowered through a trap door.

Then Thundercracker was off, racing up makeshift steps and up to were Starscream lay, still unconscious from the needle pricking from before. Here, Thundercracker froze, and he cast a warning glance to Skywarp who merely shrugged and waved for him to continue on.

With an angry sigh Thundercracker lowered his face close to Starscream's, and hesitated once more before planting an angry kiss on his superior's cheek.

Unfortunately (Although fortunate for the play) Starscream chose this very moment to wake up, and with an angry screech raised a hand and brought it to hit Thundercracker's face, who reeled backwards and landed on the ground. "It was part of the play, you fragger!" Thundercracker yelled, his hand on his stinging cheek.

All at once Starscream looked around him, his optics widening as he took in the audience. Then with another screech he jumped from his bed, running off stage with Thundercracker following him with loud, angry stomps.

The stage darkened again and the Autobots took to talking to themselves, Bluestreak erupting into a fit of giggles until he was silenced with a stern look by Prowl, only to start up another fit when Wheeljack made a comment about Starscream and the sounds he made.

By the time they'd quieted down again they were shocked to see Ratchet on stage, a large fluffy moustache pasted on his face, and a large costume with several pillows shoved in to assume the role of a large stomach. He was glowering angrily as Starscream gave him a grudging hug, before being tugged away by a stone-faced Thundercracker to dance.

"What are you doing? Starscream hissed angrily as he was spun around in what he soon determined to be a waltz.

"If we just finish this fragging thing, we can go back home and never speak of it again." Thundercracker hissed back as he danced with his superior, working hard to ignore the dress that was now changing colours from pink to blue and back again.

And then the curtains dropped. It was all silent momentarily until Autobots and Decepticons alike erupted into a loud round of clapping, and the curtains rose again to reveal the entire cast, each taking reluctant bows to their audience.

Skywarp looked especially pleased and he gathered up his ducks, which were quacking and flapping their wings about them, and carrying them up with him to the stage he took a bow himself, placing the ducks on stage before him.

"Can I go home now?" Prowl asked from the audience and Optimus made a sideways glance, smiling under his faceplate.

"Not until we can all file out on our own."

"Did I ever tell you how cruel you are?" Prowl said in reply, his mouth twisting into a frown as he stared at his leader.

"No, but I'm sure it'll become a regular saying." Optimus shrugged and leaned back, watching as the curtains dropped again and standing as everyone else did, Prowl a little too quickly. He watched as his tactician sped off through the crowds, ducking and weaving through arms and legs before making his way outside before undoubtedly speeding his way home.

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Shorter than the rest. Next one has to do with ice and cardboard boxes. And Skyfire. I think. Or something else entirely, I dunno yet. D: I'm never doing a play again. I don't think, anyway.