Drabbley, angsty things.
Note at bottom…
T-E-S-S
p.h.i.l.o.p.h.o.b.i.a
-fear of love-
Tess Tyler often gets confused. After all, there is a fine line between love and hate and lust, and when mixing all three, it can be dangerous. But Tess lives for danger. She lives for the blurred colors that look so much prettier when she doesn't know where she is. And the burning alcohol that travels down her throat. And the expensive, leather jackets she clambers onto, trying to inhale the last scent. And the smoke that she breathes, keeping her alive. Yes, Tess lives for this. But, if she loved something, it would all come to an end. Because it's a known fact that everything she loves or loves her leaves her. Because love takes patience, and support, and trust, and dependency, and compassion, and all the things she really can't be bothered to have. Love hurts, and Tess hates hurting. Tess only likes pleasure. Because hurting causes pain (which she wants to be immune to) and tears (which smear her makeup). Tess much rather have forgotten nights, and drunk strangers, and be best friends with bartenders. That way she's prepared when someone leaves her. Because she knows they eventually will anyway. They always do. And every single time, each person takes a little more of her with them. She knows one day they'll take so much of her that she'll whittle away to nothing, and the last couple of strings she's hanging onto will break.
But that's ok; she's kind of tired of hanging anyway.
N-A-T-E
a.t.y.c.h.i.p.h.o.b.i.a
-fear of failure-
Nate Black is a winner. Nate Black gets everything he wants because he pursues, and persuades, and persists. His three P's. So when Caitlyn Gellar comes along, he knows he has to have her. She's broken, and bitter, and boisterous, and he wants her so badly. But Caitlyn (oh sweet, bitter Caitlyn who he thought he had) falls for an equally vitriolic, oppressed, and more narcissistic boy, who has no rhyme, reason, or meaning. Nate liked patterns, therefore he didn't like this non-meaning boy, nor when he saw Caitlyn's broken, lying eyes light up with love and admiration for such a person. So, Nate found another girl. A girl who reminded him so much of Caitlyn, but in such a different way. But the non-meaning boy found her too. Eventually, Nate's options were numbered and diminishing slowly but surely. So Nate moved on next to next, until he lost count. Suddenly, his three P's didn't matter anymore. Because he was on top, and he had control, and he had the power, and he could be the one to break all these different people.
Don't they see? Better a sore winner than loser, and Nate liked to win.
M-I-T-C-H-I-E
t.r.o.p.o.p.h.o.b.i.a
-fear of making changes-
Mitchie Torres hated change. She hated changing schools, and classes, and friends, and chords on her guitar. She even hated changing clothes. The thing she probably hates most is changing years. She use to love her birthday, until one day, when she turned ten, she found that after you had your birthday that year was gone forever. Another year of false hopes, and false promises, and painted smiles. On her nineteenth birthday, real change comes. That's the day when her feelings change. She changes her mind, and realizes she no longer loves Shane Grey. She loves his brother. The one who always changes his mind, and his hair style, and guitars. So, she just sits there quietly, afraid of either too much, or too little change. She's not sure of which. But either way, she's sure of one thing.
She hates that change isn't there when she needs it the most.
C-A-I-T-L-Y-N
a.s.t.h.e.n.o.p.h.o.b.i.a
-fear of weakness-
Caitlyn Gellar doesn't do emotions. She doesn't do tears, or yelling, or happiness. Caitlyn Gellar does fake smiles, and biting her lip until it bleeds, and watering eyes. Heaven forbid emotion, though. Because emotion allows people in, and shows weakness, and Caitlyn Gellar certainly doesn't do weak. If Caitlyn Gellar did weakness, she would practically give into anything. She would be unhappy with Nate, instead of pining after Shane. She would believe ever sweet lie Tess told her, and every not-so-sweet one that came from Mitchie. Caitlyn can't do weak. Because if she does weak, her heart will shatter. Not bruise like Mitchie's, or break like Tess's, or bleed like Ella's. But shatter.
And everyone knows if something shatters it hits everyone around it too.
S-H-A-N-E
a.g.l.i.o.p.h.o.b.i.a
-fear of pain-
Shane Grey doesn't get close enough to something for it to hurt him. Shane Grey stays distant, and doesn't take chances or 'what ifs'. He acts on impulse. Not thinking. Just saying or doing. So when he does Tess Tyler, he doesn't think about the consequences, and he defiantly doesn't say sorry. When Mitchie finds out is when he starts to regret what he did, and as she walks away he lets her go, because seeing her broken eyes might cause him pain. And pain leads to caring, and caring to suffering, and suffering back to pain. It's a nice little circle that he doesn't want to be a part of. If anything is going to cause him pain, he decides it has to be himself.
Because his wounds are self-inflicted.
E-L-L-A
c.a.c.o.p.h.o.b.i.a
- fear of ugliness-
Ella Martinez likes pretty things. She likes sunsets, and bubbles, and smiling. Ella doesn't like ugly things. That's why she has to be perfect. But, no matter how hard she tries, she can never see perfection. Perfection is flawless skin, and eyes that light up, and a blinding smile. Perfection is pretty, and pretty isn't her. So, Ella makes herself feel pretty. She watches glitter flow from her body, and she realizes that it's so much prettier inside then out. Because, even if her eyes and smile don't glitter, the pretty shimmering liquid does, and so does the razor that catches the light. And when Ella doesn't eat? Well, it's not that she's purposely doing it. It just makes her feel so much prettier when she can proudly state she wears a size zero, which almost all the pretty models wear too. So even if she can't be completely pretty, she's so close she can taste it.
And she's certainly not giving up on it, because pretty is as pretty does, and Ella likes pretty.
J-A-S-O-N
d.e.c.i.d.o.p.h.o.b.i.a
-fear of making decisions-
Jason Greene doesn't like deciding. Deciding can never be undone, and can break promises, and lose friends. Deciding is hurtful, and hurtful is ugly. And who wants something ugly when you can have something so much prettier? Sure, a little lie here and there can't hurt anyone, right? When people talk about Tess's little addictions, Jason pretends he has no idea what they're talking about. No one needs to know that he's aware Tess goes missing for days, because if he told where she was, it would be deciding against keeping his promise to Tess, and that's more important to her then her being able to seek help. When girls ask him if Nate is cheating on them, he decides not to tell, because he knows that Nate really loves Caitlyn anyway, so it doesn't make much of a difference. And if he told the other girls that, he would be deciding not only to go against Nate's trust, but to break Caitlyn even more than she is. And he knows that decision keeps her from falling completely apart. He decides not to stop Ella from doing the things she does, even though he uses all his might to tell her she really is beautiful, but he also decides she must have issues with herself, and that she should work them out. He decides not to interfere with Mitchie and Shane's relationship. And he tries. He really, really, really does. But he doesn't try hard enough, because he accidently decided to kiss Mitchie that one night, and now he's afraid to ever again.
And decides it's better if he just keeps his mouth shut.
Storilikaphobia- Katie's fear that you don't like her story :l Please prove it wrong??
I tried hard, and had good intentions, and it started fine, but then I lost track and left it sitting, so when I came back I had lost my ideas. They're floating around somewhere, and defiantly not in this story. If you find them, return them? Please and thank you.
It's not my favorite thing I've done, but I don't think it's the worst. Haven't done Camp Rock in a while, and I remembered this the other day when looking through my files. And I didn't mean to rhyme when I just wrote that… Anyways…
I like 'Truth Be Told' more, not playing favorites or anything. Some of this just didn't make sense. My mind is elsewhere.
Two notes: 1. My updates are going to be weird, and off and on because it's the end of the school year, and hectic, but also because I'm really sick, so I have to have surgery thingy over the summer, so I have all these medicines in my system. Nothing extremely bad, but that's why my stories are a little wacked out, because of my headaches, and such… Not a good excuse, but still.
Second, happier note. For all those who read, and still remember, 'That's What She Said', I've suddenly have had inspiration again, so expect one or two updates in the next week or two???
Noreviewamastorphobia- The fear that you won't review… I really want to be cured, and would be so delighted if you do :)
Review that is… Because the button is right there and wants to be poked :)