Notes: Just a little something I thought up really quickly. I won't bother trying to place it in continuity, since doing that with Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicles alone makes my head hurt something fierce.

Summary: Hiiragizawa Eriol was born with Clow's magic, the memories to control it locked inside of him. All he needed to regain them was time, and a few years in the care of the Dimension Witch.

A Price to be Paid

A Cardcaptor Sakura - xxxHolic Crossover Oneshot by

Nate Grey (xman0123-at-aol-dot-com)

His first memory was not of loving parents, but of two frightened people who wanted to be rid of him.

Eriol does not hate or love them: he merely understands. Babies who levitate toys in their sleep are not considered normal.

At the same time, he does not think of them as parents, just as they stopped thinking of him as their child. Instead, he merely considers them temporary aids to Clow's will, and those, however insignificant they may seem, are still necessary from time to time. Eriol occasionally sends them large sums of money with no explanation, but there is no love behind this act, only a sense of duty that makes little sense to him.

He remembers, with startling clarity, that the first person he ever loved was not so much a person as it was a talking dust bunny. It slept beside him at night, woke him with a new song every morning, and greatly resented being called "it," though after a while, pretended not to notice when Eriol did so as a joke.

He recalls Yuko, Maru, and Moro, untouched by time, unchanged from the first moment he met them. This is a fact that has never bothered Eriol, and was actually a source of great comfort. To live without fear of death coming for those precious to him was a wonderful, elusive gift that he was far too young to appreciate. It is one of his greatest regrets, but there is nothing to be done about it now.

From the start, Yuko was strict but warm, loving but distant, mysterious but open. She did not see Eriol as a freak, rather, she claimed he was boring and depressingly normal for a child of such great potential. He has adored her for that since.

"The price for your room, board, and lessons has already been paid," she told him, "by a great man you know nothing of. In the simplest terms, he laid down his life for you. As such, he was a grand fool, but grand, nonetheless. You should always keep this in mind for the days ahead."

Despite the price being paid, Yuko managed to find another, as she always did. For every day that he worked in her shop, Eriol regained a lost memory. Even now, he cannot recall exactly when the transition from simply living with Yuko became working for her, only that he enjoyed both immensely, and as a result, could not really separate one from the other in his mind.

"You have recovered all the memories you can in this way," Yuko explained on their last day together. "The rest that were meant for you will gradually come back, the longer you remain outside the shop. But once you leave, you will no longer have a need for this place, and so you can never return to it. And even if you wish to keep your memories of this shop, I must ask that you pay a price for those, as well."

In the end, the only thing Yuko asked for was his likeness: that is, his facial features. Even then, she only made a copy of them, rather than taking them entirely. When he asked why, she merely smiled in that sly way of hers and told him it was a discount, because she adored him in return. When he asked again, she sighed and admitted, "For posterity, if you must know."

Eriol liked to think it was more because she would miss him, too, and that gazing upon his face, day after day, would offer her some small comfort. Because if that was the case, it was a price he was all too willing to pay.

Even after leaving Yuko's shop, however, he found that it's influence remained with him in the most curious ways. Only after they had been together for several years had he noticed how amusing Spinel Sun's false form could be, or why those warm hugs and silly songs of Nakuru's sometimes made him ache in a way he'd tried so hard to forget.

And perhaps it was a blessing that in all his travels, not once did Eriol ever encounter anyone that reminded him even remotely of Yuko, and how much he missed her. It should have been a blessing, at least, but somehow, it always felt more like a curse.

The End.

Endnotes:

I did this largely because my first impression of Watanuki was of a skinny Eriol. I'm not implying that they're directly related or anything, just that they look alike to me, is all.