And with absolutely no ado at all, I present the second installment of Walking Backwards…

Alice planned it all, down to the last second. And to be honest, I was grateful to her. I didn't want to play it by ear but still, her nosy attitude was getting on my nerves.

I paced around the room, counting everything that came into view.

"Thanks," I whispered.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" He asked.

I nodded.

Alice took my hand. "We have to go, Bella."

Jasper gave me a quick half-hug and went to embrace his petite wife. I couldn't help but cringe. I turned away from them, but I couldn't block out their thoughts completely.I wasn't jealous but I did feel a pang longing, wishing for what Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, Emmett, Carlisle, and Esme all had.

--

The plan was to sneak in through Edward's window after midnight. The idea petrified me but having Alice there was reassuring. I wasn't at all sure that I could do this, but I was positive that I couldn't leave Forks. I couldn't abandon my family like that. It would be too cruel.

Flash, My mouth against his neck, kissing up his throat. "I love you…" His head resting on my chest, as if to hear my heart beat…

"Please?"

I drew in a deep breath, and although it wasn't needed it helped just a bit to calm my nerves.

"Let's get this over with." My lips barley moved over the words.

Alice scaled the tree before me, creaking open the window. I flinched and the sound in my ears was a scream.

You can do this; I know you can, Alice tried to comfort me.

I didn't respond, just took one last gulp of air before I grasped the first branch of the old maple.

I had been right in my guessing, this was Edward's room. His CD player sat on his desk; dozens of albums scattered around it, the blue collared shirt he had worn the day before lay over the back of the oak chair in front of his computer. My eyes scanned over his possessions and I felt kind of bad, intruding on his privacy like that but it needed to be done, I had to know if I could do this. I let my eyes wander last to Edward himself.

Edward was lying on his side, wrapped in a light off-white sheet. His mouth was closed, his beautiful bronze hair falling over his face. I felt myself drawn to him, like two magnets. The urge to kiss him was almost too much. And it shook me a bit.

I stood there, watching him intently, completely resolved in my newest realization, the realization that a boy who's blood was better than the rest, a boy that probably hated me, a boy that I'd almost killed, that that boy was the one I wanted.

"No." At first I thought the boy had woken up. My shoulders tensed for impact, although there was zero possibility that a fragile human like him could ever hurt me. At least not physically.

"Bella…" he groaned. I crept over to his bedside.

"What, Edward?" I breathed.

He sighed and burrowed his face in the pillow.

I watched him longer, kneeling beside his bed, my position never changing. His pupils flickered under his eyelids. I was dying to know what was whispering through his mind. My teeth ground together in annoyance, my eyes squinting. Finally I relaxed, letting myself stand.

"Goodnight, Edward, sleep well." And the last of my breath left me.

Alice touched my shoulder. We should go.

I closed my eyes as I turned my back on the boy.

--

"What happened?" Emmett pestered the moment I was through the door, grinning. "Did you make out with him?"

If he was killable I probably would have murdered him a long time ago.

"No, Emmett," I sighed. "He was asleep the whole time, I just watched him."

Emmett stomped his foot. "You are so boring," he wined.

"And you are such a baby." Rosalie saved me and I flashed a gracious smile in her direction.

Rose walked over to Emmett's side and stole a kiss, smirking into her lover's lips.

Esme and Carlisle were grinning stupidly at me.

I knew what they were thinking.

"What?" I demanded, trotting over to the stairs. "I glance at a boy once and you two get all googely eyed at me."

They looked hurt and I started apologizing in an instant. "Esme, Carlisle, I-"

Carlisle held up a hand, stopping my protests. "Bella, it was our fault; we got ahead of ourselves."

I blinked.

"Uh-" I stuttered.

Esme took me into her arms. "We love you, Honey, and we just want you to be happy. If us leaving you alone means that we're fine with it."

I closed my eyes and buried my head into her neck. "I love you too, mom, dad. I don't know what I'd do without you." My eyes burned. I may not have husband but I had my mother and father and, for now, that was all I needed.

--

Of course, Alice being Alice had a second plan. And knowing her, it would be something as completely insane as this.

"Please," She begged as we weaved through the hordes of students flooding the halls. "For me?"

Okay that was definitely against the rules. As we all knew, Alice's best weapon was her puppy dog face.

"Fine, I'll do it." I crumpled under her gaze. I was a total wimp of a vampire.

One thing I'd learned in my years with Alice was that she always won. Over Carlisle, over Esme, over Rosalie, over Emmett, over Jasper, and over me. It was just something you had to learn, to always get on her side first. Because you can't ever win against a physic pixie, yep, that's the truth.

I looked down, my mood thundering dangerously, a bold of lightning crashing down through my bones. The clouds the gathered behind my eyes and rained down my throat. My fists clenched at my sides.

Alice patted my arm. "It's okay." She whispered. But in her thoughts she said

He loves you.

I glared at her.

"You don't know that."

She smirked at me, her little feet flying away down the hall.

So many thoughts whirled around me, their currents pressing into my head until bursting.

I have three papers to write tonight, I've always been such a procrastinator…

Me pregunto cómo Rodrigo está detrás en México, yo espero que él esté bien-

What is wrong with him? How could that idiot dump me? Me!? That girl is a lousy…

The constant noise, buzzing, trilling; it could drive anyone mad. The voice on the outside of my ears the thoughts on the inside in my head, the thousands of blood types pressing into my nose it was all overwhelming. All extremely irritating.

I slid into the girl's bathroom, shutting the stall and locking it. If I could cry I would. The pressure was over whelming me. Alice kept pushing on me to make a move on Edward and I was too much of a wimp to say no. But I could never let Alice see me like this, a vampire acting so much like a human. I got up and walked out of the bathroom stall. I went out to find Edward and tell him what I had to tell him. The truth.

--

My insides were shaking as the cafeteria came into view, the students stuffing their mouths with the hell-food they needed to sustain themselves. Edward was sitting with Newton and that Jessica Stanley girl, my insides crawled at the sight. As I walked towards them, Newton and Jessica both turned towards me. Newton gave me a look of pure adoration. If I could have thrown up I would have. Jessica gave me a death glare. If looks could kill, I'd be dead ten times over.
"Edward," I called. "Can I talk to you about something?"
His eyes widened. "Sure," he replied simply. He got up and walked over to me. I could smell his breath, his heart beating through his veins; I could feel my teeth ripping through the tendons and muscles of the neck finally to split open the- wait? What was I thinking? Edward wasn't food, god that sounded like some Disney movie or something. I sighed, cursing myself inwardly.

I chewed on my lip as he took is seat across from me. Our feet touching under the table, his innocent emerald eyes boring into mine, I froze.

He was blushing, a trait I'd lost along with my humanity.

"So…" He started, looking down at his hands. "What did you want to tell me?"

I opened my mouth and then closed it. "Um…" I finally said. "I-I did have something to tell you."

"Ah... what was it?" he asked, still looking away.

I noticed that neither of us looked at each other as we spoke. He was so beautiful, his alabaster skin almost as luminescent as one of ours, his eyes such a deep green. I just wanted to listen to his voice and never let it stop.
"Well...I wanted to ask you if you wanted to hang this weekend." I blurted, knowing that Alice would kill me if she heard this. Which, I sighed, she probably did.
"Sure," He sounded too excited.

"This isn't a good idea," I warned him. "You shouldn't want to be near me. It's not safe."

Edward finally looked at me in the eyes. "I feel very safe with you."

I stood up. "Okay, I'll meet you at your house on Saturday at noon. Bye."

I could feel Edward's eyes trailing after me.

"Good… bye…" He muttered.

--

"Alice," I growled. "I am not wearing this!" My voice broke through two octaves. "I look like a- a…" I trailed off in horror. The shirt didn't even reach down to my belly button and the jeans... I flinched.

"Come on, Bella, for me?" Alice fluttered her eyelids.

"No." I put my foot down. "I am wearing what I want to this date!"

Alice's lip quivered. "Bella?" She squeaked.

"No."

"Bella?"

"No."

"For me?"

I pressed my fist into my forehead. "I promise you, Alice, I won't wear something that bad. I just don't want to look like a hooker."

The door creaked open. "You're going to be late if you keep this up," Rosalie purred from behind me.

I sighed. "Thanks Rose. Now Alice, leave." I opened my walk-in closet –courtesy of You-Know-Who- and stared at the walls of clothing. Finally picking out a white camisole and a beige cardigan from the shelves I added a light pair of blue-jeans and I skipped merrily along down to my car. And I froze in horror. My beautiful Volvo was bright pink. I slammed my fist into the drywall, leaving a huge gaping, fist-sized hole. I'd have to make it up to Esme later.

"Damn you, Alice." I cursed.

I ran back inside to grab the keys to my Aston Martin Vanquish. As I got the motor running I cringed. I didn't want Edward thinking I was spoiled rich, despite the fact that the latter was true. Cash wasn't important when you had a daddy-doctor who could work twenty-four seven and a physic sister who could predict the rise and fall of the stock market.

When I got to his house –which took absolutely no time- I parked around the corner. Waiting. 11:58, 11:59… finally 12:00. I inched the car around the corner and into his driveway. I could hear him in his house, slipping on a pair of shoes and taking one last look in the mirror.

Please, I prayed to god knows who. Please let me not screw this up. I took a deep breath.

"Edward, here I come." I pushed open the car door and slid out of my seat. Each step towards his door was terrifying, each step closer and closer to my demise. My hand hovered over the doorbell for exactly five seconds before I gathered the courage to press the small, rectangular button.

The door creaked open.
"Hello," My voice seemed too inhuman; although that made sense it annoyed me.

"Hey," Edward leaned his head against the door frame. I smiled shyly, causing a blush spread across his pale cheeks.

I motioned to the door. "Can I come in?"

He jumped and blushed even redder, "sure," he muttered.

He led me to the kitchen, pulling out a chair for me to sit. My eyebrows creased a bit at this, I thought the trait of pulling out a lady's chair had stopped years ago. He turned to counter.

"Water?"

"Hmn?"

"Do you want some water?"

I shrugged and then realized he wasn't looking at me. "Sure, if it's not a bother."

Edward opened the refrigerator. A burst of cold air rushed out and I felt him shiver. He quickly grabbed the pitcher of water and poured it into two plain glasses. He carried them back to the table, setting one in front of me and taking one for himself.

He took a sip. "Where are we going today?" I looked around the kitchen, spotting the flaws in the table where a glass had been set, and the nicks where a knife once hit.

I choked down a swallow. "I have a special place in mind."

"Where may that be?" He put the glass to his lips but didn't drink.

"A little place only I know." I looked up at him through my impossibly long lashes. He blushed. I chuckled.

Suddenly I was in front of him, my thumb under his chin, tilting his head up to mine. "You're lovely when you do that," I purred. His heartbeat sped up. I ran the back of my hand along his cheekbone. Then, "No, this is wrong."

"W-what?" He stuttered.

I closed my eyes and looked down, sinking away from him. "It's dangerous for me to fall in love with you."

Then it was he who touched my face, bringing my eyes to his. "You can fall in love with whoever you want, even if it's not me." He whispered.

I stood up suddenly, causing him to fall back into his chair. "We should go. We'll need enough time if we're going to get home before dark."

"Yeah," He stood, looking more than slightly distracted.

He followed me to my car gaping at the luxurious Aston Martin Vanquish before him. "Is this yours?" He asked.

I shrugged. "Yeah, Alice trashed my Volvo so I was kind of left with no choice."

He opened the driver seat for me and I climbed in. "Thank you," I muttered.

Edward looked down at his hands. "You're welcome."

I started driving, as soon as we were out of town realization hit me. Trapped in that small little car, his scent washing, pumping over me, he was physically in danger. I took a deep breath. "Oh, God," I choked.

I slammed my foot into the brake and clenched both of my hands over my nose.

"Are you alright?" Edward's voice was frantic.

"I-I-" I stuttered. I threw the car door open. "I think I'm going to puke," I lied, jumping out of the car and running to the side of road. Dry heaves racked my body.

"Shh, it'll be okay." I felt one of Edward's hands pulling back my hair, the other on my back.

After my body stopped heaving I sat back into his arms. Relishing in the warmth

"Are you alright?" He asked.

"Yeah," I lied. The truth was that I was more confused than anything. My body had automatically rejected the scent of his blood; I had been fighting so hard…

I wiped my mouth on my hand.

"L-let's go," I stuttered.

He wouldn't let me drive the car, even though I insisted I was fine. I watched his face as he clutched the wheel, his knuckles turning white, the open window blowing in his face.

"Are you okay?" I finally asked.

"No." He grunted. Then, "You scared me."

I looked at him sadly, his beautiful human hair blowing out behind him, his beautiful human eyes staring straight at the road. Then I looked again. The motor purred under his grasp, I wanted to touch him so bad it hurt.

"Edward," I whispered.

He glanced at me with those deep emerald eyes. "What?" He turned back to the road again, the car speeding up a little.

I twisted my marble hands together. "I'm not who you think." I muttered to myself. "I can't love you; if I ever bit you…"

Edward's posture stiffened, his back going ridged, his abdominal muscles clenching. "What did you say?" He asked through his teeth.

My eyes widened. "I didn't say anything."

His gaze flickered to me and then back to the road.

Silence.

"You lie."

I wished my body had some kind of reaction. Instead I looked down into the dark leather seats, searching for some pattern to the crazy scribbles that ran down the sides.

"You said bite."

I looked into his eyes, letting some of the monster sneak through. "I said nothing."

I saw the recognition in his face, of the creature I was. Creature. Not human. I think somewhere in his mind he knew the truth, but these lies I've weaved worked. At least for now. I wondered when they were going to break.

He turned back to the road again. "Where are we going?" He asked through his teeth.

I growled in the back of my throat. "To Port Angeles, dinner, is there a certain place you like?"

He shrugged. "Not particularly."

I turned away from him, looking out through the glass at the world rushing by. We were slowing down. My eyebrows creased. "What are you doing?"

Edward pulled the car to the side of the road.

"Okay, give."

I froze.

"What are you?"

The question hung in the air on a thread.

14