Chapter one
I hear the gun go off and feel myself turning cold. I'm falling and there is nothing I can do.
My DCI just looked at me in shock and called me "Bolly". Neither of us could believe that he had shot the bullet, that it had gone so wrong. I just focused on him as I drifted. Then the others came and I could see the shock in their eyes too, they looked from me to Gene and I knew what they were thinking. But he didn't shoot me on purpose. He didn't look at the others but kept his gaze on me. I could feel myself drifting away, but I couldn't die. Could I?
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"Mum? Are you ok? You were talking in your sleep again." God, it was the second time I had been dreaming of them, and since I had only been back for three days it wasn't looking very good.
"Sorry Molls, I'm ok. What was I saying?" I couldn't remember saying anything but I certainly knew what I was dreaming of, Gene.
"You just kept saying 'I'm home now' and 'I can't go back'. You sounded really scared. Oh yeah and you kept saying someone's name, it was a mans name…Gene. Who is he?" Oh God, this was the question I wanted to skip. I didn't like thinking about him, it hurt too much, and I didn't want to talk about him, especially to my 13 year old daughter.
"No idea, anyway it was just a dream. Nothing to worry about Molls." I hugged her tight, successfully ending the discussion. Oh I did miss her so much when I was gone; it felt so good to hold her again and for her not to be a dream. "Go get ready for school, Evans taking you again today. I have to pop into work to collect some stuff." I didn't tell her that the 'stuff' was about Sam Tyler and the other world that I couldn't stop thinking about.
"Ok, love you mum. Be careful."
"I will, love you too." I watched her walk out of the room and then I let out a deep sigh. Gene. Why couldn't I just let go? I was home now, where I wanted to be. So why did I keep thinking about my life there? It's not like I'd ever go back, I wouldn't leave Molly again. But he needed me, he screamed at me to wake up from my coma in '82. No, I couldn't go back. But what if I didn't have a choice in the matter? No Alex, you can't think like this. It's not good. So I got up and got ready, like everything was fine and normal.
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I knew I shouldn't be driving, but oh well, no one would find out. Jeez what was happening to me! The old me would have never gone against doctors orders! But I had changed in my time away, which was mainly down to one man in particular. I parked up outside the station and climbed out of my car, I missed the Quattro. I missed it's speed and it's flashy look, but mainly I missed it's driver. As I walked up the steps I felt strange, like I didn't belong here, at this station, or in this decade.
There were only a few people in the office, on their flashy computers. They wouldn't notice me slip in and grab the file from my desk. I hoped.
"Alex? What are you doing here? You shouldn't be at work, you should at home resting." Caught, I turned and looked at my DCI, who was nowhere near the same as Gene Hunt. He was younger, fitter, posh and hated all things old fashioned.
"Hi Rob, I just thought I'd pop in and grab some work to read over while I'm off. You know me, don't like sitting around doing nothing." I tried my best to look seductive and bat my eyelids but fear I may not have succeeded seeing as I looked like shit.
"Ok but be quick. Don't want you to work yourself too hard either, do you hear me?" Stop acting all concerned you posh bugger. I wasn't used to my DCI being all caring and touchy feely, my most recent one was completely the opposite. But that was one of the attractive things about Gene Hunt, he acted like he didn't give a toss when really when you got to know him better he was kind and caring, if not a tad bit overprotective.
"Ok" I grabbed the file, "bye Rob" then got out of there. I needed fresh air. No… I needed a drink.
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"Ahhh, lovely" it was nice, not perfect, but nice, just relaxing in my flat with a glass of red wine and Sam Tyler's file resting on the coffee table. I hadn't opened it yet, I couldn't bring myself to read all about the people I myself had grown to love. I had after all based my first impressions of them on what he had written, but I now knew them closely and cared about each of them. I sipped my wine, it tasted too expensive and good, nothing like Luigi's 'house rubbish' as the Gov had always called it. It wasn't the same drinking on your own; it didn't make me feel as good as I thought it would. Then I realised why. It was him that always made the drink so good, so satisfying. Thinking this I let a tear escape and roll down my cheek. I missed Gene Hunt so much.
I gasped. Bloody hell Alex, did you really just admit that? But it was true. I felt like part of me was missing, I didn't feel alive anymore. Sam had said that; he said he hadn't felt alive in 2006 when he'd woken up. Gene was right. We were a team, in more ways than one. We had been a broken team before I left, but we still had our connection. He needed me. He needed me to clear his name and be there for him. And I needed to explain and make him see the truth. But that would mean going back, and I couldn't do that. Molly needed me as well. Did she need me as much as him? Of course she does Alex she's your daughter! I shook my head, "I seriously need help".
"What can I do to help you Ma'am? Please tell me what to do." My head snapped to the T.V. where I could see Shaz sitting next to an unconscious me. I nearly spilt my wine in shock. Was I imagining it? No I wasn't. I could clearly see her sitting there holding my hand talking to me. But I hadn't been contacted by anyone since I saw Gene in the hospital, and I still hadn't gotten over that yet. What made it worse was that Shaz seemed to be crying.
"Oh Shaz don't cry." I couldn't bear seeing her so upset. She was a true friend to me. "I'm ok, I'm home. You can't help me Shaz."
"Everything is such a mess. The Gov's been accused of shooting you and is trying his hardest not to get arrested. Ray and Chris believe he didn't do it but I'm not sure. I mean he did threaten to kill you in front of all of us, but then he was so distraught after they charged him. I'd never seen him so upset. I don't know what to do anymore." She looked wrecked, I so wanted to help her, to hug her and tell her that everything was fine. But it wasn't. I knew now what I had to do, I didn't know how but I knew I had to get back to them somehow.
I got off of the sofa and knelt in front of the T.V. looking closely at the picture on the screen. "Shaz, I'm going to come and help you, I don't know how, but I will." I touched the screen with my hand and as I did the picture went fuzzy. "No don't go! Shaz!" But the picture didn't disappear; it changed. I could now see a rough looking Gene Hunt sitting on his own drinking. He was crying. My Gov was crying. "Gene. Don't. Please don't." I hated seeing him upset, it hurt me.
"Come on Bolls, just wake up already. I need you. I didn't mean to shoot you, it was an accident. They think I did it on purpose, but I'd never…I'd never hurt you on purpose. You're my Bolly." He let out a deep breath then. "Come on Gene snap yourself out of it. If anyone saw you crying like this they'd think you had a heart." He downed his drink in one and walked over to a tape player. I recognised it, oh my God, he's in my flat. He pressed play and I heard my voice fill the room.
"I had an offer today. An offer that may have got me home. But I didn't take it, I couldn't be what they wanted me to become; corrupt. I couldn't do that to him, it would break him."
Gene pressed stop and sat back on the sofa. "Who's him? Is it me? If it is me Drake than I have been a twat. I can't believe I didn't trust you, but you did tell me loads of crap that no one would have believed. But I should've." He let out another sigh and poured h8imself another drink. I hadn't realised it, but I was crying. Crying for him. He really did need me. If I didn't go back I didn't know what would happen to him, he'd probably become depressed and an even worse alcoholic. I had to help him get his life back on track.
"Don't worry Gene, I'm coming to you."
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