The Importance of Names

By: CrystallicSky

Disclaimer: I don't own Xiaolin Showdown or any of its characters, nor do I make any profit or attempt to with the writing of this or any of my other pieces.

Warnings: Language, sexual implication, homosexuality, etc.

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"General Grant."

"No."

"Napoleon."

"Certainly not. That would imply a complex."

"Yeah, you're right…Charlemagne?"

"No."

"Spartacus?"

"…why? No, it doesn't matter why. No."

"Nostradamus."

"No."

"Umm…Hannibal of Carthage!"

"…do I really have to explain to you all the things that are wrong with that?"

"Mmmm, I see your point. Maybe…Mozart?"

"I'm not partial to it."

"Vivaldi, then?"

"Could we navigate away from composers?"

"Fine. Thanatos?"

"I don't like it."

"Anubis?"

"The god of embalming?"

"Okay, okay, um…Hel?"

"If you must do this, I would rather the name not be female."

"Gotcha. Azrael, then?"

"I'm flattered that you're picking the names of gods, but gods of death have quite the negative connotation in this case."

"You're right…OH! How about Chu-Jung?"

"…Chu-Jung?"

"Yeah, yeah, it's perfect!" Jack exclaimed happily. "He's the god of fire and executions and rules over justice, revenge, and death!"

"Just how is that perfect?" Chase dubiously inquired; it was obvious by his tone, however, that he liked the name.

"Your phallus is a thing of great power!" the goth dramatically intoned. "Raw power, like fire, and should you choose, you could easily use it via method of sex appeal to punish those who transgress against you: seduce them and then have your revenge! Chu-Jung is the perfect thing to name it."

The everlord folded his arms across his chest, thinking it over. "Hmm…I suppose Chu-Jung would be acceptable," he conceded. "If you're absolutely sure you won't back down on this…giving my cock a name issue."

"All guys should have names for their dicks!" Jack protested. "And no, I won't back down on it. Besides," he gave a crude gesture to his own crotch, "Darwin's getting lonely down there without a playmate that has a name."

"Why did you name it that?" Chase wondered of his lover.

" Because," the redhead shrugged with a grin, "it ain't going inside a woman and making any kids, so it's doing its part to help natural selection."

The elder man chuckled at that. "You geniuses are an odd bunch," he said.

"We're eccentric!" Jack declared, pouncing his lover back to the bed and straddling his hips. "Now, c'mon, I think Chu-Jung and Darwin should be formally introduced…"

Chase smirked at the albino, agreeing, "I do believe you're right, Spicer…"

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A/N: Just a silly little drabble I thought up out of nowhere; I'm actually on a roll right now considering I'm working on and getting ever-closer to finishing two or three other fics besides this one.

Anyways, though, enjoy my creative spurt while it lasts 'cause God knows when the next one'll be! Thanks for reading, and I hope you liked the fic! :D